N/A: This chapter is dedicated to GiddyGirl, and her spontaneously combusting cauldrons. Everyone go read her stories! Go! Why are you still reading mine! Ok, read mine, and then read hers!
Disclaimer: Not mine. Nuff said. I also don't own the great big words song. It is by Micheal Mark and Tom Chapin.
Addy had finally come up with a foolproof plan to get Alice and Frank together. It just included many people helping her. But she was sure they would help her.
"What do you mean you're not going to help me?"
"You heard me, what you are doing is sneaky, deceiving, adulterous, double-crossing, fraudulent, witty, shifty, devious, and not to mention histrionic!" said Lia trying to shake he off as she followed her down the hallways.
"That's redundant!" said Addy running after her down the charms corridor.
"I thought you didn't know what that meant!"
"Yeah well since you and Lily, and Maddi wouldn't tell me I had to look it up!"
"You looked it up?" said Lia stopping in her tracks, "You actually looked it up in a dictionary? With pages and a cover and big words that descried other big words?"
"Yes!"
"No you didn't," she said, "You just asked Remus!"
"Remus, a dictionary, what's the difference!"
"Well for starters Remus is a person."
"Then he swallowed a dictionary! Because he uses really big words constantly and defines them with other big words!"
"He uses words like precisely and definitely."
"Yesterday in potions he told me my cauldron was about to spontaneously combust! And I didn't know what it meant so I asked Sirius but he didn't know so I had to ask Lily and she just told me to stop emitting sound through my vocal chords. But I didn't know what that meant either so I had to ask James and then Professor Slughorndocked ten points from Gryffindor for talkingand then my cauldron exploded!"
"You must have had a really bad day."
"Horrible."
"Alright, I'll make a deal with you, if you read the dictionary and actually learn the words I will help you."
"Deal!" said Addy and then she skipped away, humming some incomprehensible tune to herself.
The next morning the first class was transfiguration. Everyone had already taken their seats when Addy came dancing through the door, humming a song to herself, although in reality she was humming it quite loudly.
Suddenly she caught sight of Amelia and rushed over to her.
"Remember when you said I had a really bad day?"
"Yeah," said Lia, not quite sure where Addy was going with this.
"Well, say it again."
"Um, You had a really bad day?"
"Yes it was an appalling, atrocious, dreadful and horrific span of twelve daylight hours and twelve nighttime hours," she said dramatically, and Sirius and James applauded.
"Wow," said Lily, "Why are you doing this?"
"I'm just demonstrating in a practical structure to Lia that I did, without a doubt interpret the inclusive dictionary as she requested."
"You got her to read the dictionary?" Remus asked Amelia, cocking an eyebrowin suspicion.
"I don't believe it either," said Lia slowly.
"Well, deem it true because I accomplished just that."
"Wow," said Lily again, "I feel like I'm reading a book!"
Professor McGonagall walked into the room and Addy took her seat behind Lia, next to Sirius.
"Today class we will be turning tissue boxes into jewelry boxes," she said standing at the front of the class.
Addy rolled her eyes. She had already proved that she could do this last class as had Sirius and James.
"Ms. Mae, would you please pass out the boxes," said McGonagall pointing to a large box full of tissue boxes.
"Why unquestionably it would be my honor to be of assistance you in this audacious undertaking," she said, dramatically taking a bow.
Professor McGonagall gaped at Addy, unsure of what to say.
"When did you learn all those words?"
"Why do you all assume I'm dim-witted? I'm essentially moderately intelligent, Professor, I can't believe you, you stereotyped me as a dumb blonde per fault of the hue of my hair!" Addy wailed.
"Um, I'm sorry Addy," said McGonagall, quite taken aback.
"It's ok, I understand. You see I've grown up.
When I was a little kid, a "diminutive juvenile,"
"You mean yesterday," Remus interjected.
I hated to read and write, I was an "uneager bibliophile."
"That's redundundant!" said Lia
Now I love words for how they sound
And how they "communicate."
Perhaps I should explain myself, that is, "elucidate."
"She really did read it!" exclaimed Lily.
Great big words, I like big words.
Letter by letter, the bigger the better
Addy jumped onto Professor McGonagall's desk to continue her song.
Great big words. La la
Sirius and James joined in.
la la la la la la la la!
Now maybe you're "adept" at sports or "exceptional" at school,
Maybe you're "vainglorious,"
Which means you think you're cool.
"Who me?" said Maddi
But give me a "massive ideogram,"
A big word to make my point.
"I didn't know that!" said Lily
When you can "verbalize" yourself
You can really rock the joint.
Great big words, I like big words.
I get a thrill out of every syllable
Great big words.
My word of the week last week was "unique."
People thought I was one of a kind.
When my word of the day was "distingue"
People said I was very refined.
But they look at me like I'm an alien
When I say things like "sesquipedalian."
"What does that mean?" James asked Remus
"How am I supposed to know?"
But what, me worry? I can't go wrong
With a word that's a foot and one half long.
James takes out a ruler and begins to measure random objects.
Big words are "prodigious terms"
Now don't they sound delicious?
"I'm hungry," said Peter, randomly
They impress your teachers, confuse your enemies
And make your friends suspicious.
"What is she saying!" said Sirius, freaking out.
But that's okay we'll start a trend
That soon will sweep the nation;
The hyper-linguistic polysyllabic speech association.
"H.L.P.S.A. for short!" said Lily.
Great big words, I like big words.
No extra charge if it's very large, those
Great big words.
Great big words, I like big words.
Letter by letter the bigger the better
Great big words. La la la la la la la la la la !
(Reiterate please!) La la la la la la la la la la !
(Diminuendo.) La la la la la la la la la la !
(Grand finale!) La la la la la la la la la la!
"Ms. Mae! Would you just pass out the tissue boxes!"
Addy nodded and jumped off the desk. The Ravenclaws who had transfiguration with them had looks of shock on their face.
They didn't typically break into song at random intervals like the Gryffindors.
N/A: completely random, I know but it was fun to write.