They get into the hospital room through the window, as Sakura doesn't look like she has the patience to go through the proper route, and respecting hospital admin isn't on the list of Yugao's priorities at the moment.
The second they're inside, Sakura heads for the clipboard at the foot of Shin's bed, eyes scanning the illegible scribbles on the page with far more comprehension than Yugao would've expected.
"Penetrating abdominal trauma, hematoma in the right thigh, mild tissue destruction in both hands and feet, mild concussion," Sakura mumbles, frowning at the paper. "AIS Three, but they ran an ECG, CT scan, blood panel and urinalysis… Senpai, was he electrocuted?"
"They seemed to think so because of the burns on his hands." Yugao explains, slumping into the chair at Hayate's bedside and reaching out to hold his limp hand, running her thumb over his knuckles anxiously. "But I don't know what the verdict was."
"Looks like his skin was burned at the point of contact but his internal organs don't show signs of electrocution." Sakura mutters, frowning, then drops the clipboard and moves closer to Shin, green-glowing hand settling on his forehead. "Do you know what happened?"
"Hayate was on guard duty." Yugao sighs, propping her other elbow on the mattress and dropping her head onto her hand while her eyes traced over Hayate's still features. "Shin was staying at ours' after training. About an hour ago, he ran into my room, told me to alert the hospital, and jumped out the window. ANBU patrol found them, and the body of a Sand jounin."
Sakura's head snaps up at that, a sudden look of recognition in her eyes as they fall to Hayate, before she smooths her expression into something more sympathetic. "And how's Hayate-san?"
"He's badly cut-up." Yugao admits, too tired and stressed to sugar-coat her words. "The medics put him in a medical coma, but they seem confident he'll pull through."
When Sakura simply nods, seemingly content for the silence to settle between them, Yugao voices what's been bugging her since she recovered from the white-hot terror upon seeing her fiancé on the brink of bleeding out.
"You never told me Shin's a sensor." It doesn't quite come out as accusative, because she isn't mad about it per se, but whatever Sakura hears in her voice is enough for her to tilt her head and frown, glancing from Yugao to Shin's unconscious face.
"Is he a sensor?" she asks, seemingly unsure, and it's Yugao's turn to blink.
"He sensed Hayate from halfway across the Village." She says slowly. "I'm a decent sensor, but that sort of range is usually reserved for the Yamanaka or Senju."
Then, when Sakura's frown doesn't ease and she continues to contemplate Shin's sleeping face, Yugao feels the pieces slot together in her mind. "Wait, you didn't know?"
"We never called it by name." Sakura replies with a shrug, turning away from Shin to shoot her a wan smile. "Remember, senpai, that we came from ROOT. The standards for excellence were much higher there. The fact that Shin always knew where we were wasn't really questioned. It was just… a fact of life, you know?"
A fact of life. Yugao repeats in the privacy of her mind, too tired to really be as disbelieving or hysterical as the blasé admission would usually require. Sure, yeah, alright.
"Do you know his range?" she asks instead, after she wrenches her thought process away from Sakura's complete dismissal of the sheer skill needed to do what Shin did.
"Not really." The girl admits, frowning at the wall. "But, if you recall, he did track me to Kumo once, that time with fake agent Lizard."
Whatever Yugao could've said to that is interrupted by the door suddenly opening. Genma rushes through, eyes falling on Hayate with concern, then flickering to Yugao with sympathy, but he freezes when his gaze lands on Sakura.
Then, an ugly sneer twists his face, one Yugao hasn't seen on the man in years, and he shakes his head, stepping back through the door just as quickly as he'd come in.
"I'll be back when she leaves." He throws over his shoulder, then shuts the door behind himself, not quite slamming it because they're still in the hospital but making his displeasure clear nonetheless.
Yugao sighs, tired and exasperated, but when she glances at Sakura, something apologetic or commiserating on the tip of her tongue, the girl is staring at the door, mouth slightly agape and eyes wide and confused and hurt.
"Um," she asks, her voice breaking on the word, and she blinks rapidly, and Yugao realises with a start that her eyes are glistening, "what was, um, that about?"
She doesn't know. Yugao realises with a start, a realisation which is immediately followed by, Genma, you idiot.
"Sakura do you… know about Aoba?" she asks carefully, and Sakura blinks again, though she raises a hand to wipe at her eyes before any tears can fall.
"Who?"
That answers that, I suppose.
"Aoba. Yamashiro Aoba." Yugao explains with a sigh, scrubbing a hand down her face. "One of Genma's closest friends."
"…Okay?" Sakura mumbles, still sounding confused, eyes wide and shining still, and Yugao's struck by how young she looks in that moment.
Shit, most of the time she also forgets the kid is twelve, Crow was right.
"Aoba is, or was, also known as agent Bat." Yugao tells her, and it takes a second before the realisation hits, but when it does, Sakura freezes. "Genma's been avoiding you for a few weeks at this point, since Aoba's demotion was announced."
"I've been busy." The girl hedges, clearly hearing the indirect accusation beneath the words and not meeting Yugao's gaze for the first time in years. "But why is he mad? Does he think I reported Bat- sorry, Aoba- to, what, to…spite him?"
"I don't know what he thinks." Yugao admits flatly, stifling a yawn and squeezing Hayate's hand for comfort. "But apparently, you reported Aoba right after Gen tried to warn you off Wolf."
"That's a coincidence." Sakura defends, and she sounds annoyed now, the earlier hurt replaced with defensiveness. "I reported Bat because he intentionally allowed a comrade to get hurt."
"Yamashiro's younger sister was on your Yamanaka's genin team." A quiet, hoarse voice interrupts them. Both of them startle, heads jerking to where Shin is lying, blinking blearily and wincing at the bright light that came on when Genma opened the door.
"I'm so fuckin' sick of hospitals." He mutters immediately after, and that's enough to jar Sakura into motion.
"Shin!" She exclaims, moving to rush to his side, though she jerks to a stop as his words register, turning to Yugao with wide, questioning eyes.
Yugao herself just nods, because while it's not exactly common knowledge, Shin is right.
Sakura frowns, seeming deep in thought, then she visibly shakes her musings off and heads to Shin's side, reaching for his forehead again.
"How're you feeling?" she asks quietly, smoothing his hair back in a way that strikes Yugao as oddly maternal before she shakes the thought off.
"Like I ended up on the wrong end of a Wind jutsu and got thrown through a concrete wall." Shin grumps, closing his eyes under Sakura's ministrations.
"And the electrocution?"
"It…went through me, I think." Shin offers, voice softer than Yugao's used to. "I've seen what Hatake's technique can do, and I definitely don't feel like I got hit with something like that."
"You can call him by his name, you know." Yugao cuts in when Sakura just hums, and even to her ears, she sounds exasperated, though she shoots Shin an amused look. "You two are friends."
"Yugao-san, don't kick a man when he's down." Shin grouches at her, a whiny note in his voice, though he doesn't open his eyes. "And don't say that about Hatake and me. I'd throw him off the Hokage Mountain for a dango stick."
Yugao rolls her eyes, exchanging a look with Sakura, though the girl appears more amused than annoyed even as she cuffs Shin over the head lightly.
"What even happened? Has anyone taken a report?" she asks, and Shin cracks his eyes open to squint at her, though he doesn't even pretend that her strike hurt.
"Yeah, an ANBU took my report before I passed out." He studies Sakura for a second, then sighs, clearly reading something from her non-expression. "I felt shishou's SOS signal, so I told Yugao-san to alert the hospital and ran to help. Killed the Suna-nin before he could kill shishou, then engaged the other shinobi when shishou passed out. Got a Raiton thrown at me, then, when that didn't work, a Wind jutsu strong enough to throw me clean through the wall, as I already said."
"Did you get a look at the other man's face?" Sakura checks, moving away from Shin to stand against the wall closest to the window. Shin seems to relax more against his pillows at the regained space and he looks grateful.
"No. He stayed in the shadow then melted into mud before I could." Shin gives Sakura a look at that which Yugao can't read, but Sakura seems to understand, if the way she pales is any indication.
Silent communication appears to pass between the siblings, then Sakura shakes her head and smiles wryly.
"Do I need to give you a lecture about running into danger without backup?" she asks instead of addressing whatever she's just learned, her tone idle, but the look in her eyes anything but.
Yugao thinks she's teasing, but…it's Sakura.
Shin snorts, waving a dismissive hand, looking like he's already feeling better. "Speed was of essence. Besides, it was Hayate-shishou. What was I supposed to do, wait for ANBU to get their shit together? He could've died."
Yugao thinks that's a reasonable explanation as far as 'rushing into danger alone' goes, but even if it wasn't, she's not about to complain about the fact that Shin's intervention likely saved Hayate's life.
She turns to smile at Sakura, but the girl has frozen, staring at Shin like she's seeing him for the first time.
Yugao is watching her as it happens, which is the only reason she realises the extent of the change – one moment, Sakura looks surprised, but still visibly worried. The next, all expression is wiped from her face as if it was never there.
As Yugao watches, her gaze grows flat, the jade as cold and hard as the gem it resembles. Her face becomes eerily blank, more mask-like than her actual mask, and the worry and surprise disappear from her eyes until there's simply nothing.
For a moment, Sakura's still, no emotion to be found on her face or in her posture.
And then, there's rage.
"You gave me," she hisses suddenly, her voice low and dangerous, and the drastic change appears to startle Shin, "so much shit – me and Inu – for getting attached."
She's staring at Shin, no warmth or sympathy in her eyes, and Yugao watches as Shin twitches at the word Inu, and despite his weakened state, appears to put his guard up, visibly wary.
"So. Much. Shit." Sakura – or whatever facet of her Yugao is currently witnessing – repeats, and her voice, despite the low tone, is chillingly cold and biting. "And now what?"
She studies Shin for a beat, utterly still, and Yugao feels like she ought to interfere in the sibling conflict, maybe step in and distract Sakura, because she's getting the disquieting impression that she's contemplating hurting Shin.
But whatever god of wrath and distilled violence appears to be possessing Sakura, it is not enough to break through that final, omnipresent need to put her siblings first. Instead, after another few seconds of simply staring Shin down, Sakura steps back, closer still to the window, a sneer curling her lip.
"You're a fucking hypocrite, Okami." Is all she says, and then she's gone, not so much as a rustle of leaves or puff of smoke to betray her save for the suddenly-open window.
Shin, even though it never came to blows, for the first time since Yugao has known him, looks hurt. Not physically, at least, but Sakura's accusation appears to have dealt more damage than the Sand jounin's sword.
"Do you want me to try and find her?" Yugao asks after a few seconds of silence, because for all that Shin started as Hayate's student, he has become someone Yugao genuinely cares for as well.
"Aa, no thank you, Yugao-san." Shin sighs, sounding exhausted all of a sudden, then seems to shake himself off, and when he meets her eyes, he's back to the proud, unflappable facade Yugao's familiar with. "That wasn't a version of my sister you'd know. It's easier and safer to just let her work it out at her own pace, trust me."
"…ROOT stuff?" Yugao guesses, and Shin smiles wryly.
"Remnants of the conditioning, probably. More than we initially thought."
"…Dangerous?"
"Only to herself."
Yugao very, very carefully doesn't wince.
"I…alright." She agrees, because Shin would know more about what to do in this situation, and she's willing to trust him on this. "Thank you, by the way."
Her heart breaks a little at the way he startles, looking away from the window his sister had exited by to meet her gaze with no small amount of incredulity in his eyes.
"You've saved Hayate twice now." she explains, waiting for the light of comprehension to dawn, but Shin just continues to look completely baffled. Like he doesn't know what to do with her thanks. Or like he's not used to getting thanked. "Whatever Sakura's feelings on your actions may be, I'm grateful. So, thank you."
She gives him a few seconds to process, but when he continues to simply stare, she huffs, turning back to Hayate and tracing over the bandage on his neck with careful fingers. "Feel free to pretend this conversation never happened. I just wanted you to know."
It takes him a few minutes, but eventually, Shin speaks.
"I…" his voice is rougher than Yugao's used to, suspiciously wet, and she is gracious enough to not look at him as he collects himself. "I'm coarse and unpleasant on the best of days. I get along with Kakashi because we're both abrasive, obstinate bastards, but you- you all but took me in. You help me. You ask me to stay the night after training late because you don't want me walking across town at night even though you know what I come from."
Shin swallows, and for a moment, Yugao thinks that he's going to close himself off, go back to that untouchable, unflappable façade he shares with Kakashi, but he surprises her.
"Outside of my siblings, you two are the closest thing to a family I've ever had." He admits quietly, and Yugao's head jerks towards him without conscious input, not sure if she heard right. Shin's got his eyes closed and face turned down and away, as if anticipating her reaction, but he's not taking the words back, even though she can see the pink tinge on his ears.
"Saving Hayate's life…that's not something you need to thank me for." He finishes softly, and after a few more seconds, Yugao looks away and bites her lip, trying to talk herself out of-
-fuck it.
"Shin?" She asks, and she doesn't even try to hide the fact that her voice wobbles a little, but, damn it, she wasn't expecting to get blindsided like this. "Will you stab me if I hug you?"
Shin's startled laughter at her question isn't a yes, and that's all the convincing Yugao needs to do just that.
When Sakura comes to, she curses, ugly and annoyed.
She's in ROOT HQ.
Again.
And she can't recall how she got there.
Again.
Whatever her psyche is doing, whatever's causing these 'blackouts', she's getting reaaaally tired of it. At least she's not in a vine cocoon this time. And Shin's already in the hospital, so it's not like she can almost kill him again.
Small mercies.
She sighs, feeling all of her almost-thirty years suddenly as she pushes to her feet. Crawling out of the trapdoor that leads out of the HQ and into the forest on the outskirts of the Village, she squints at the sky, startled to find that the sun is up, and considerably higher than she expected considering she was woken up by Yugao in the middle of the night.
Shit, Naruto.
Her head's still discomfortingly empty, her thoughts quiet but not in the relaxing way. More like someone took any essence of her and scooped it out, leaving only the shell behind.
She cares for Naruto, has managed to separate his genin self for whom she's a mentor from the man whose hand had been in her lung, but she's not in the right mental state to deal with his particular brand of energetic right now.
Crouching again, she flashes through familiar seals and presses her hand to the ground, not even blinking at the chakra drain.
"Yu, Ryu." She greets quietly, and Ryu immediately steps closer, bumping his snout against her temple gently, and Sakura reaches up and absentmindedly scratches at his neck, taking a deep breath to ground herself. "I need a favour."
"Tell us, hime." Yu says, lowering his head to his paws and watching her expectantly.
"Feel like playing catch with Naruto for a few hours?" She asks, following Yu's lead and letting herself fall back from her crouch to a sitting position. "I need to get my head on straight, but he needs some guidance, especially so close to the exams. Worst case scenario, take him to Kakashi."
"Of course." Ryu rumbles by her ear, then takes the sleeve of her pyjamas between his jaws and tugs until she follows the movement and gets first to her knees, then to her feet. "But you need to get some sleep, hime."
"Half the reason I asked for the favour, Ryu." She mumbles, huffing a laugh, and Ryu nods, then jerks his head at Yu, and they both bound off.
Sakura smiles, grateful for her summons and to Shisui for providing her with the opportunity to meet them, then heads towards the Village proper and, more importantly, home.
On the way, she thinks of what to do with Naruto, and adamantly refuses to think of Shin, because every time she remembers the hospital, she remembers Sai's scared face when she came home and he had Shino over. Remembers the fear in his eyes when he apologised to her for getting attached. Remembers the anger she felt then, and in retrospect, it was nothing to what she's feeling now.
She's not against Shin forming attachments of his own. But she is against the way he went about it, and his blatant hypocrisy.
And then, a familiar voice snaps her out of her thoughts.
"Look, Kimi-chan, a ninken!"
The Village is still quite empty, the early hour and imminent Chunin Exams discouraging all but the most determined of merchants and the shinobi who had no other choice but to be awake from coming out.
In the relative emptiness of the street, Sakura's eyes find the speaker without issue, and her breath catches.
A man is carrying a child on his hip, though the girl looks a bit big for that carry to be comfortable for him. A woman is standing beside them, looking fondly amused if a little exasperated, her hand half-covering her eyes as the Inuzuka partner of the dog the man had pointed out grins, waving at the girl.
"Puppy!" The girl laughs, and in any other situation, Sakura would've snorted, because the ninken is around the size of Ryu and Yu, which makes him easily shoulder-height with the child.
But she can't, because she isn't seeing anything funny about the situation unfolding in front of her.
Because the girl? The girl has dark, shoulder-length black hair, and soft, grey eyes, and her facial features are strikingly reminiscent of Sasuke's.
And the man holding her? He is about as far away from her looks-wise as could be, with blue eyes and pale pink hair, while the woman with him is blonde, her emerald eyes bright even as far away as Sakura's standing.
She's looking at her parents.
And, if she's right, one of the Uchiha children they'd saved is on her father's hip.
Sakura bolts.
Inosuke steps into Intel at half past eight in the morning, coffee in hand and a pile of folders he can't ignore any longer under his arm.
Before he can head for the admin office, he's got Tonbo on one side and Iwashi on the other.
"There's a kid outside your office." Tonbo informs him cheerily from his left, and Inosuke pauses right before the turn in for the stairway to the admin office. "Try not to be your usual self, hm? The brat looks shell-shocked."
There's only one person in his life who fits the description 'kid' recently, and who would willingly seek him out, especially here. Inosuke sighs, nods at Tonbo and raises an eyebrow at Iwashi until the other man also takes the hint and fucks off, then changes course for his office.
When he spots her, he frowns and lengthens his stride. Once he reaches his destination, Inosuke crouches in front of Mongoose, studying the girl.
Her legs are pulled up to her chest, arms wrapped around her shins and chin propped up on her knees. Her eyes, though, are staring blankly ahead, almost through Inosuke, though he has no doubt that every one of her senses in on high alert. He can't see her mouth, but he's willing to bet by the frown marring Mongoose's brow that the expression he'd find on her face wouldn't be one he's seen before.
So he waits, knowing better than to try and touch. He counts almost three hundred seconds before the girl's eyes lose the far-away look and focus on him, though he wouldn't have spotted the glint of recognition if he hadn't been so actively looking for it.
Even then, the flicker that passes through the girl's eyes is…muted. And there's none of the bizarre joy that's usually on Mongoose's face when she spots him.
"Can you get up?" he asks evenly, watching for any nonverbal reactions, since he's not sure the kid can manage words.
He sees her hand twitch, fingers curling in a way that's much more likely to be intentional than a simple muscle spasm or anxious tic.
"Repeat?" he requests, and, as he thought, her fingers twitch again, same pattern. "I'm afraid I don't know that language." he informs her flatly, absently realising that there's only one type of sign the kid could use that he wouldn't know.
ROOT.
When Mongoose registers his words, her frown deepens a fraction before she forces herself to nod, the motion jerky and shallow, but undeniably an affirmation.
Rather than wait or continue having the conversation outside his office where every movement from the other Intel shinobi makes Mongoose's chakra twitch and her attention switch immediately to assess the potential danger, Inosuke rises, gesturing for the kid to do the same.
He blinks, and Mongoose is on her feet, though she's no more relaxed than she was when she was curled into herself on the floor. Stifling a sigh, Inosuke opens the door to his office and gestures for her to go in, shutting it firmly behind them.
He looks at Mongoose as he turns the lock, needing her to register that he's not locking her in, and watches as she tracks his fingers when he moves away from the door. When her eyes flicker to his face, there's not a hint of surprise in the icy jade when she finds him already looking, though she doesn't make a single move to sit down or relax from the tense, defensive posture she's fallen into.
Standing there in her blue and green turtle pyjamas, hair in disarray, he'd almost be able to believe the kid in front of him is nothing more than a kid, if not for the way her gaze is still sharp and wary, flickering around the office with the sort of constant vigilance usually seen on war veterans.
Instead of saying anything more, he heads to his desk and dumps the pile of reports he's brought with him, giving this new version of Mongoose the time to get comfortable in his space on her own terms.
Eventually, she takes the chair she usually sits in and drags it back, so when she sits, she's got both, the door, and the window in her periphery. And then, as she resumes her earlier position of nigh crouching on the chair, Inosuke notes the glint of metal by the tips of her fingers, momentarily illuminated by the light coming in from the window.
Senbon.
He's glad his common sense had advised him against trying to touch the kid before.
He turns his attention to the reports, making sure to keep his posture relaxed. Whatever this facet of Mongoose is, it's at least somewhat connected to ROOT, and he has a feeling that how he proceeds will greatly impact their relationship in the future, particularly in this context.
Finally, after almost twenty minutes since she settled into the chair, Mongoose takes a shuddering breath and fully relaxes, and when Inosuke glances at her, the earlier eerie blankness is gone from her face, replaced instead with fatigue and frustration.
"Welcome back." He greets, and when her eyes flit to him, a scowl twists her lips for the briefest of moments, though she also looks relieved.
Not fully 'back', then.
"Feel like telling me what happened?" he asks idly, surprised when Mongoose scoffs bitterly.
"Do I have a choice?" she mutters, and it's…not a tone he's heard from her before.
"Of course." He says, serious once again, putting away the files for the moment to meet her gaze and stress the importance of what he's saying. "Always."
And then, Mongoose sighs, frustrated, and scrubs a hand down her face, though he notes she never fully covers her eyes with her hand.
"I know." She breathes, slightly less antagonistic this time "It's just- I- Sorry."
He waits, expectant now, and Mongoose frowns again, looking away as she speaks.
"Shin's landed himself in the hospital. He- I got angry when I found out how. I lost…control." She looks like she bit into a lemon as the last two words pass her lips, and Inosuke's focus sharpens. "Next thing I remember is the ROOT headquarters. I got out, intending to head home, but on the way, on the main street, I-"
She trails off again, her gaze skittering around the room, and her expression a mix of longing and terror. She swallows. "I saw my parents."
Inosuke carefully, very carefully restrains his reaction to the words.
"And then?" he asks simply, and Mongoose sighs.
"Then I was here."
If only it could be so simple.
"Do you recall the time between seeing your parents and ending up in my office?" he presses, because these episodes of hers seem to be becoming more frequent than he's comfortable with. "Or the journey from the hospital to the ROOT HQ?"
He can't say he's surprised when the answer is a simple, stiff: "No."
[He wonders if such extreme dissociation can even be called a coping mechanism.]
"These moments where you 'lose control' appear to be increasing in frequency." He points out instead, choosing a different alley to explore and giving voice to his earlier thoughts. "Can you think of why that might be?"
"If I could, I wouldn't be here." Mongoose snaps, anger and frustration and spite dripping from her words in equal measure, and Inosuke pauses.
He remembers Mongoose admitting that she learnt medical ninjutsu from books. That she learnt history, and politics, and most of her jutsu from scrolls. Admitting, in one of their earliest sessions, her tone almost absent-minded, that she likes to read, but her chosen lifestyle rarely allows her to indulge the hobby. Remembers her calling herself a bookworm, a paper-ninja.
That thirst for knowledge certainly explains Mongoose's almost compulsive need to know everything, as well as the frustration he's seeing now – she doesn't know something about herself, and she's angry about it.
But, that's not important; the fact of the matter is: "There are many more reasons you should be seeing a psychiatrist than just finding the root of your dissociation."
That, however, has the opposite effect to what he intended.
"Oh yeah?" Mongoose demands, sharp and biting, shifting on her chair, though he doesn't see her pull out the senbon again, even though he wouldn't be surprised if she did, in this state. "You keep saying that, yet so far, all we've done is talk."
"Talking in a safe environment helps establish trust, which is essential for any meaningful exchange in the therapeutic context to occur." Inosuke reminds her, keeping his voice intentionally inflectionless now, because he's not sure what Mongoose is angling for, but he has a suspicion it's unlikely to be nice. "What were you expecting? A mind-walk and an immediate solution?"
"You're a Yamanaka, aren't you?" she shoots back, eyebrow raised challengingly, and it's not the cheapest shot anyone has ever taken at him, not by far, but despite his best intentions, what makes it sting a little is who it comes from.
"My Clan techniques are a supplement to my knowledge and application of psychology." Inosuke informs her icily, striving for calm. "Not the foundation of it. And I'm not here to indulge your masochistic tendencies."
Those sharp jade eyes flit over his face, then, seemingly deciding against pressing those particular buttons again, she scoffs.
"The trust exercises are unnecessary." She tries, and Inosuke has an odd feeling like she's…reaching. Procrastinating, almost. "You're my Captain; I already trust you."
"In the field." He points out, still in possession of the grace and patience needed to not mention that she didn't react to his last comment, though he makes a mental note anyway. Mongoose's gaze flits to him for the briefest of seconds at that, and this time, she frowns instead.
"You've done a mind-walk on me before."
Ah.
"Of a specific memory." He sighs, pushing the remaining folders away so he can fold his arms on his desk and pin the kid with a flat, serious stare. "The kind you're demanding is different. It gives me full access to your mind and body, and nothing you can do would be able to stop it."
He waits a beat, giving the words the time to sink in, then concludes: "It's violating."
"I've thrown off a Body-Switch before." Mongoose mumbles, almost absentmindedly, then jerks, startled when her words register, and the look in her eyes is almost…afraid.
Like she hadn't intended to tell him that. Like she thought she shouldn't have told him that.
Inosuke decides against trying to unpack that, and nods instead.
"I can believe that." he says slowly, honestly, cataloguing her reactions. "Your mind is very well guarded."
Mongoose's frown deepens instead of easing at him agreeing with her, and she tilts her head, curious. "How do you know that?"
"In the hospital, after the mission with Bat." He explains, watching her for even the slightest tell. "The memory you were showing me ran its course. I got curious. But before I could 'snoop', I was informed I'd 'overstayed my welcome' and promptly kicked out from your mindscape."
Mongoose blinks at him for a few long seconds, her face completely blank save for the barest glint of fear in her eyes. Then, she appears to almost visibly switch thought processes, summoning back that mulish, reticent persona, and asks;
"Can you at least give me a diagnosis?"
Inosuke considers her, the way she almost has to force herself to meet his gaze when she realises he's waiting for it, then declares:
"No."
Before Mongoose can complain, or do anything, really, he continues.
"But I can tell you that even if I did use my Clan jutsu on you the way you're asking, it still wouldn't give you a simple solution. You've lived through things most adult shinobi don't experience, but your psyche is still that of a child, for all that you rarely act like it. It'll take years to work through that trauma alone."
[as he speaks, he carefully pushes the file he's been compiling on the kid during their sessions under one of the bigger stacks of folders; he knows what he'll see on the first page already: self-esteem issues; paranoia; survivor's guilt; CPTSD; dissociative amnesia/DID(?); passive suicidal ideation
The fact that he's been able to compile his list after barely a dozen sessions speaks to just how badly Mongoose needs help with managing her head.
Inosuke's urge to shake Hatake rears its head again. And Inoichi too, while he's at it, just for missing something this big, twice.]
"If I have so many issues, as you seem to think," Mongoose asks after a solid minute of simply staring at him, a complicated expression on her face, "why am I allowed to be out in the field?"
Inosuke snorts, though it's humourless.
Fuck Hatake and his penchant for adopting annoyingly perceptive geniuses. He's never the one who has to deal with them.
"Normally, your dissociation alone would be enough to take you off field missions." He tells her simply, and Mongoose does a visible double-take, frowning in a way that, for the first time since she got into his office today, is genuinely confused instead of confrontational.
"Then why don't you report it?"
"Because you don't trust the Hokage."
And there's the thing that's been gnawing at Inosuke since they started these sessions.
He realised after three meetings that Mongoose is a very, very good actress, perhaps even unconsciously. He realised after another two that she most definitely shouldn't be allowed out of the Village, or be in charge of genin brats, two of whom appear to be triggers for her CPTSD, at that.
He also knew, even after that very first meeting, that he won't take his findings to anyone, barring maybe Bear, while the Third is still alive.
So he shoots Mongoose a look, one he hopes conveys just how annoyed he is at the fact that he's now invested in her wellbeing, and continues. "It would be counterproductive to my goal of helping you if I recommended you for forced leave and doing so revealed such an easily exploitable weakness."
For the next few minutes, Mongoose just stares at him.
Barely blinking, barely breathing, just looking, her expression that of quiet wonder and not so subtle disbelief.
Then, she smiles, and it's small, tired, and barely a shadow of the grins she usually throws around, but it's undeniably genuine.
"Thank you, senpai." She says quietly, genuinely, then takes a deep breath that stutters on the exhale and adds, "And I'm sorry for what I said. I wasn't really angry at you."
"I gathered." Inosuke admits, though he doesn't let his guard down.
"Can I show you what happened in the hospital? And why I'm angry?" Mongoose asks after a beat, and now she sounds tired as well as looks it. "I…don't really want to talk about it. But I want you to know."
"Of course." Inosuke replies once he remembers how to make his voice cooperate, then, to hopefully distract the girl from his momentary lapse in composure, he adds, "We can talk about your feelings about seeing your parents again tomorrow."
Mongoose scowls at him for that, almost back to her usual self now, then gestures for him to come closer and closes her eyes.
Their earlier conversation won't be forgotten anytime soon, and Inosuke knows he'll have to watch for even more things in their sessions now, but at least this time, he doesn't hesitate when he puts his hand on her forehead.
"Those look like some serious thoughts, senpai." Sakura comments quietly when Inosuke pulls away and falls silent, seemingly deep in thought.
"They might be." He replies absently, though his eyes are far more focused than the idle tone would imply. "But I'm not sure you're ready to hear them."
"Tell me." Sakura requests, because if today has proved anything, it's that, conscious or subconscious, she trusts this man, far more than just because he's her ANBU Captain.
She'd noticed, although she did her best to not think about it, that occasionally, she'd lose hours. Particularly when she was scared or overwhelmed or didn't know how to handle something, which wasn't ideal in their line of work.
The fact that her unconscious self decided to run to Inosuke when she felt overwhelmed instead of back to ROOT HQ spoke to the man's favour more than any of Sakura's complicated feelings about trust and comradeship ever could.
Inosuke sighs, but he appears to have expected that answer, if the half amused, half wry look in his eyes is anything to go by.
"Your brother is human." He tells her simply, and Sakura blinks, momentarily thrown off-guard.
"I know that." she says slowly once she realises Inosuke is expecting a response, but the man just looks at her, unblinking and likely seeing far more than Sakura is willing to share at this point.
She feels stripped bare, both from the early morning start and the two episodes she had, and she probably should've taken the out Inosuke'd offered, but now it's too late to take her words back.
"Do you?" He asks, and though the tone is mild, the sharp look in his eyes makes them feel like a jab. When she fails to answer in the first five seconds, he continues.
"You've put him up on a pedestal, almost deified him." Inosuke informs her, and now his voice is serious, not quite accusative, but decidedly not the idle, conversational tone he'd assumed earlier. "Was his reaction hypocritical considering what he told you and your brother when you first escaped ROOT? Perhaps. But was your reaction justified? I'm not sure."
Sakura takes a deep breath, and as she releases it, she imagines snuffing out the spark of anger and indignation she can feel beneath her skin. She's almost thirty, mentally, but being told she's in the wrong stings the same as it did when she was really twelve.
"You're saying I…overreacted?" she checks, testing the word, the conversation feeling a lot like the one she'd had with Shin before she'd healed his lungs.
"Yes and no." the blond replies, and when she simply stares at him, waiting for an explanation, he huffs, a hint of that earlier amusement returning. "You hold yourself to impossibly high standards. What I don't think you've realised is that you unconsciously project those standards onto others."
"They're not impossibly-!"
"They are." Inosuke cuts her off, and he's serious again, and Sakura quiets. "It's not the childish ideal that the adults around you are perfect and without faults, but it's to the same effect. Someone close to you messes up, and it shakes you much more than a simple human error should."
"So, what do I do?" Sakura asks, and even she can hear the note of helplessness in her voice, and Inosuke seems to soften, though his expression doesn't change.
"Being aware of the problem is a good start. Beyond that, it's up to you." He explains, shrugging lightly. "Maybe consider apologising to your brother, though."
"I hate that you're so rational." She grumbles, settling more comfortably into her chair. "Makes it really hard to argue with you."
Inosuke snorts, the sound sudden and seemingly startled out of him, and Sakura manages a small grin, feeling oddly accomplished.
"Brat." Inosuke chastises, though he sounds more amused than annoyed, closing the folder in front of him and raising an eyebrow at her. "Go home and go to sleep."
"Can't." Sakura shoots back, raising a hand to rub at her eyes, Inosuke's words reminding her that she's been awake since three in the morning. "Gotta find Naruto."
"What do you need to do with him?"
"I sent my summons to keep him busy when I got out of ROOT HQ, but I need to make sure he's ready for the final round." She explains around a yawn, dropping her hand and stretching until her back pops, and Inosuke pins her with a judgemental look.
"What you need is sleep." He presses, refusing to budge, and Sakura rolls her eyes, beyond exasperated.
"Senpai, come on-!"
"Food and sleep." He repeats, cutting her off. "You go voluntarily or I knock you out. Your choice."
"I am not leaving Naruto to fend for himself five days before the finals." Sakura shoots back, meeting his eyes and letting him know that she's not backing down on this.
Inosuke sighs, sharp and annoyed. "Fine. What does the kid need?"
"Huh?"
"If it gets you to take care of yourself, I can look after the Uzumaki today." he explains slowly, like she's being slow on purpose, and Sakura blinks. "Just today, but that's the best offer you're getting."
Sakura consider the offer, considers Inosuke, and her own state of exhaustion. Then-
"…Alright."
"Great. Summon Chie and Tamaki, if you have the chakra for it." He orders, and Sakura stares, though when he raises an expectant eyebrow, she obliges, somewhat bemused. "Chie."
"Inosuke-san!" Chie greets, unusually enthusiastic, and Sakura stares at her summon, shocked at the chipper tone, especially when the tiger follows it with; "What do you need?"
Inosuke doesn't seem surprised in the slightest, stepping out from behind his desk and crouching to scratch behind Chie's ears. "Your summoner hasn't been taking care of herself. She needs food and sleep. Make sure she gets those?"
When the fact that she's being double-teamed finally registers, Sakura splutters.
"I-? What-? Senpai!" When Inosuke looks up, now scratching under Chie's chin, his expression is indulgent and not in the slightest repentant. "You can't use my summons against me!"
"Can." Inosuke shoots back, patting Chie one final time before he stands up. "Did. Now go sleep, or I'll get Bear on your case."
"Bear knows?" she asks before she can bite her tongue, the tidbit of knowledge distracting her from her quest to out-stubborn Inosuke.
"Had to check whether it wasn't a potential conflict of interests if I was your Captain and your shrink." he shrugs. "Got the official blessing and all, so unless you want to explain to the Commander why you're refusing basic self-care, I suggest going to sleep."
"Are shrinks supposed to threaten their patients?"
"Not if they're not prepared to follow through." Inosuke shoots back, not missing a beat. "I'm not threatening, so much as warning you." and then he grins, sharp and dangerous, and Sakura is oddly reminded of Ino at her scariest, and the thought sends a lance of nostalgia through her. "So, kid, what's it gonna be?"
"…I'll go sleep." She concedes, blinking to clear the memories from her mind and bending down to pick up Chie and drape her over her shoulders. "But I want you to know you're insufferable, senpai."
"I'm very good at it, too." Inosuke replies, and yeah, he's definitely laughing at her now, so Sakura narrows her eyes and takes a gamble.
"Now you sound like Kakashi." She huffs, trying her hardest not to burst out laughing when Inosuke's smirk drops and he looks like he's a step away from declaring war.
She's about to take it back, say she's joking, and then she yelps, just barely ducking out of the way of a pen thrown like a senbon.
"Oi!" She shrieks, laughing as she dodges the pencil thrown immediately after she straightens from dodging the pen. "Okay, okay, I'm going!"
She unlocks the door and ducks, letting the box of tissues smack into the wall instead of her head and grins as she pulls it open, blocking another pen with the door.
She pokes her head back into the room and sticks her tongue out, then hides behind the shield offered by the door when Inosuke grabs the whole pen holder and holds it up threateningly. "I'll be by tomorrow. Bye, Tamaki-chan, senpai!"
And then she yanks the door shut behind her, snickering at the sound of something solid impacting the wood immediately after.
Naruto is panting, laid out in one of the meadows by the edges of the Village, back propped up against a tree and two very big tigers sprawled next to him.
He'd been disappointed upon finding out that Sakura-sensei would be late, but the promise of playing 'catch' with sensei's big-and-scary tiger summons had been enough to push any disappointment to the back of his mind because he'd been too busy running for his life.
Apparently, there's kid-fitness, there's shinobi-fitness, and then there's run-away-from-tiger-summons-for-three-hours fitness.
So yeah. He's dead.
There's no way Neji's gonna be harder to outlast than two combat-specialising summons.
And then, as he's contemplating whether he has the strength to get up and go get Ichiraku's, a man appears at the treeline, Sakura-sensei's littlest summon about three paces ahead of him.
"Uzumaki Naruto?" The man asks, stopping a few metres away from him. The tiny tiger that had been leading him hops into the space between Ryu and Yu and curls up in the patch of sunlight, and though both of the bigger tigers grumble, they don't make a single move to dislodge the newcomer.
"Who's asking?" Naruto asks, frowning at the man. He's learnt to be more cautious after Jiraiya, especially after Sakura-sensei's reaction to that conversation, so he doesn't move beyond making sure his hand is comfortably close to his pack with the chili smoke bombs.
The man who'd spoken is tall and blond, with ghostly pale eyes and a scar on his face that makes Naruto think of the scary proctor from the written exam. Similar to Morino-san, this man exudes an air that makes Naruto's hair stand on end, though, unlike Morino-san, Naruto doesn't think it's intentional.
At his question, he simply nods, and to Naruto's surprise, he doesn't seem offended at all.
Then again, Naruto can't read even a single emotion on his face, so that's maybe not an accurate assessment.
"Yamanaka Inosuke." He says evenly, and though Naruto recognises the surname, he's about as confused as to who the man is as he was at the start. "I'm your sensei's shrink."
"Is Sakura-sensei okay?!" he asks immediately, sitting up in alarm, and the man holds up a hand, though doesn't otherwise move.
"She had a rough night so I sent her home to rest."
Naruto's bewildered, both at the bland, deadpan tone, and the reason behind the man's presence here, since he doesn't think he's the sort of man who'd be content to be relegated to messenger bird.
So, because he's never been good at restraint, he asks; "And, uh, why're you here?" then, taking in the man's posture and general disposition, he adds a quiet, "…Sir?"
The Yamanaka huffs, and Naruto wants to say that he's laughing, but honestly, he'd probably have better luck reading a brick wall.
"Because she's also stubborn as a mule," he explains dryly, though there's a light in his eyes that wasn't there before as he looks at Naruto, "and didn't want to leave you without guidance so close to the finals."
"So you're here to…help me train?" Naruto asks carefully, because he appreciates Sakura-sensei finding someone to help him when she can't, but she could've found someone less scary.
"Apparently." The man in question retorts, appearing resigned to his fate. "So what do you need, kid?"
"Sensei said that Hyuuga see chakra." Naruto offers after a beat, watching the man watch him. "Is there a way to…overwhelm them? Like, pump out a lot of chakra at once or something?"
The man simply looks at him for a few seconds, his whole body still to the point that Naruto wants to get up and poke him just to check whether he's an actual person, but then-
-then, the man smiles, and-
-yep, definitely scarier than scary-proctor-dude.
…And this guy is sensei's shrink?
"Tadaima." Sai calls quietly as he slips through the door, fresh from visiting Shin in the hospital, still present enough to mind the creaky floorboard under the welcome mat as he steps over the threshold.
"Okaeri." Shibi's voice comes from the direction of the sitting room, and Sai stills then sighs, toeing off his sandals and donning the guest slippers before he pads over to the living area, a quick chakra scan proving that Shino is not home.
"Shibi-sama." He greets, dipping his head and perching on the loveseat he usually claims with Shino. "I apologise for intruding."
"I've told you many times we consider you family, Sai. Family can never intrude." The man chastises quietly as he puts the letter he'd been reading next to the tray with the tea set. When he looks up, sans glasses in the comfort of his home, his gaze is warm in a way that never fails to make Sai feel inexplicably safe. "Shino went to the greenhouse, but he should be back in a few minutes if you came for him."
"I did." Sai confirms quietly, inclining his head in apology. "I have not been…as good a friend to Shino as I should've been, recently."
"If you mean over the last two months, then I'd like to remind you that it's the Chunin Exams. Shino understands why you've been spending more time with your team and your trainers rather than with us. There's no ill-will there, I assure you." Shibi replies, and Sai feels somewhat cheered, enough to actually meet the man's gaze when he looks up.
"Thank you, oji-san." He murmurs, accepting the teacup Shibi holds out to him with a quiet thanks. "I…how have you been?"
"Well, thank you for asking." Shibi returns, taking a sip of his own tea before he focuses fully on Sai. "And thank you for another thing, actually."
Sai blinks at the change in tone, particularly when nothing follows. "Oji-san?"
"Inuzuka Tsume is a dear, if somewhat unexpected friend of mine." Shibi begins, and Sai frowns at the non-sequitur. "I was made aware that she recently spoke with your sister."
Sai nods hesitantly, because while he hadn't heard about what went on in the meeting, he'd seen Kiba around since, and the teen had given him an even wider berth than usual.
"Tsume's trust is a precious thing, so I won't repeat what she said, but she confirmed something I had suspected for a while, although I didn't know the full scope of the situation." Shibi continues, putting down his teacup and picking up the letter he'd been reading before, unfolding the paper in an almost reverent manner.
"I have a nephew." He says quietly, gaze trained on the paper instead of on Sai, and Sai takes the time to take a fortifying breath and sip his own tea to give his hands something to do. "When they were younger, he and Shino were raised as brothers. When Torune was seven and Shino five, they were approached by someone even I, a Clan Head, feared to refuse. The man wanted Shino, but Torune volunteered in his stead. I haven't seen him since."
Shibi looks up then, and Sai nearly fumbles his teacup, because there's more anger in the man's eyes than he's seen from any of his Clan in the three years he's known Shino.
"I'm sure you can guess that the man was Shimura Danzo."
Sai had guessed. He just didn't think Shibi would say it so frankly, nor that he would be saying it to him.
"This letter," Shibi continues when Sai doesn't otherwise react, folding the letter again and brandishing it like Iruka-sensei used to do with his teaching props, "is from Torune. It's the first communication I've received from him in seven years-"
Shibi cuts himself off with a shuddering breath and appears to revaluate his approach, visibly striving for calm.
"He's alive, he's with the Yamanaka alongside all the other ROOT recruits who could be reconditioned, and he's saying they're likely going to be back in Konoha in two, maybe three months, and 'could I please keep it a secret from Shino' because he wants to surprise him."
The man pauses, shooting Sai a small, quicksilver smile.
"I suspected you were ROOT from the beginning, Sai-kun." Shibi explains when Sai keeps silent, simply staring at the man as he collects himself. The admission feels like a bucket of cold water has been dumped over his head and Sai tenses, getting ready to throw himself out of the loveseat and out the door if need be. "But it was Tsume who made me realise that you're also responsible for its downfall."
Sai stills.
Then-
"Please don't tell Shino."
The plea is out of his mouth before he's fully thought it through, and a sad smile tugs at the corners of Shibi's lips in response, though he doesn't look surprised.
"I-I know he suspects something, he's too smart not to." Sai hastens to explain, though he's not sure why he feels the need to. "But- he cares for me. And- I'm scared. For him. For what he'd do or what could happen to him if- if he knew everything."
"I can promise that I won't be the one to tell him." Shibi agrees, cutting off Sai's fumbling explanation with his usual even, calm tone, and he looks…touched, though also concerned. "But as you said, Sai-kun, my son is smart. When Torune returns, he is very likely to put the pieces together."
"I'll tell him when he does." Sai promises, heart hammering in his chest. "I…Shino makes me feel normal, oji-san. I don't want to give that up, but I promise I won't keep the truth from him when he asks for it."
"That's all I can ask for, Sai-kun." Shibi replies, then sobers and stands up, gesturing for Sai to do the same.
When Sai does, cautious, not scared, never scared with this family, but somewhat wary, Shibi lays a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Thank you for bringing my nephew back to me." he tells him quietly, a wealth of emotion packed into the words. "And I'm sorry. I'm sorry the inaction of the adults who should've known better led to you and countless others losing out on your childhoods. You deserved better."
Sai stares, completely lost.
"I can't undo the past, but I hope I will be able to show you over the coming years how grateful I am for what you and your siblings did." And then, Shibi smiles, warm and gentle, though his face looks oddly blurry to Sai. "And I've told you before, but I'll say it again; you're family, Sai. My home and my help is always available to you."
Sai blinks a few times and his vision clears up enough that he can see Shibi better when the man's smile gentles even further. Shibi raises a hand to Sai's face, moving slowly, telegraphing his movements all the while, and lightly wipes under Sai's eye.
His thumb comes away wet.
As if that was the last screw holding everything together, Sai's composure shatters, and he hears the shuddering sob that wrenches free from his chest before he fully registers that it comes from him.
"Oh, son." Shibi murmurs, shifting his grip on Sai's shoulder to his neck and pulling him towards his chest, wrapping his other arm around Sai's back in a warm, secure hug.
Sai presses his ear to the man's chest and screws his eyes shut, and the comforting hum of Shibi's kikaichu is almost enough to drown out the sound of his sobs.
[when Shino gets home sometime later, he finds Sai curled up on the loveseat they usually share, deeply asleep. there are dried tear-tracks on Sai's pale face, and Shino shoots an alarmed look at his father, but Shibi just gives him a small smile and shakes his head. accepting that he won't be getting an answer just yet, Shino hangs up his jacket in his room and takes off his glasses, grabbing the scroll on genjutsu Kurenai had lent him when he'd asked and treks back downstairs. he grabs a cushion, carefully lifts Sai's head enough to sit on the loveseat as well, puts the pillow in his lap, then lowers Sai's head onto it. it speaks to Sai's exhaustion – whether physical or emotional, he can't be sure, but exhaustion nonetheless – that he doesn't so much as stir, merely snuffles quietly and remains asleep. Shino smiles to himself, small and private, and unfurls the scroll, setting one hand on Sai's hair and settling himself in for a long read.]
[the look on his face when Sai wakes up almost two hours later and realises that he'd a) slept in Shino's lap, and b) drooled on the cushion rather liberally, is enough to make Shino regret not having grabbed the camera from his room when he'd had the chance.]