Title: 逃げる手 - The Hand That Bleeds
Rating: T
Summary: "I don't want to be a Hero. I want to be a Healer. My Quirk is made for healing, like my mom's, not fighting so I train to fight like a Hero to be a Healer. I want to help others to the best of my abilities." Hisoka Matsushita, raised by her mother and who never knew her father, never could quite understand where the path she would eventually take would lead her to.
Current: Followers: 403, Favs: 332, Reviews: 314, Communities: 13, Views: 114420
Disclaimer: I do not own Boku no Hero Academia. Boku no Hero Academia is written and illustrated by Kōhei Horikoshi-sensei. No profit was made in the writing of this fanfic.
Beta: Ana-DaughterofHades
Now To Answer Some Reviews:
TheBookFrog- Who's a gremlin? Thank you for the review. I hope you like the chapter.
AlphaWolfe10- Eh. That's okay. It happens but, hey, you never know. Maybe I'll like it again in the future! My eldest stepsister is a huge Disney fan! She's got all the classics and even some jewelry and merchandise from the franchises. I think my favorite would be the Tinker Bell Series? Not really sure. What would you favorite be? And to Hisoka. How can you be so sure that she'll be back to her old self? People can change a lot in a short time span. Maybe she'll never be able to be who she once was... Maybe she doesn't want the others to find out or to help her... How can they help her in the first place? They've never really dealt with something that Hisoka's going through. Well... Let's find out about all of that later on. ^^ Thank you for the review. I hope you like the chapter.
Vedahzii- Indeed she is. I am really happy to have her as a friend and you as well. You really are a wonderful person (and dragon), Vedahzii. I just know you'll continue to be that wonderful, amazing person that you are now far into the future. I just know it. ^^ Thank you for the review. I hope you like the chapter.
Chapter 61
To A Decision
Location: Hisoka's Room, Fifth Floor of Heights Alliance, South Side of U.A. High School Campus, Northern Musutafu, South of Tokyo, Honshu, Japan
Date: October 18, 20XX
Hisoka let out a long, tired sigh, eyes opening slowly, and blankly stared up at the ceiling. Another sleepless night - one to add to the already long list - and it seemed that it'd only continue from there. On and off that switch flicked. Oh, how she wished she could flick it off for once and just sleep a dreamless slumber. She was... starting to remember the dreams...
Since that... thing... that voice... appeared, she remembered what those dreams were like. It had been a blessing she had taken for granted, it seemed.
'You know who I am.'
She refused to believe she was that. That was not her. Never her.
No, she didn't. She couldn't. She couldn't. She couldn't. She couldn't.
NeverNeverNeverNeverNeverNeverNever-
Well, she didn't remember what it was nor did she want to. Did it honestly even matter?
'I've always been with you.'
FrombirththeSinsoftheFatherthefatherthefatherthefatherFamilyHisFAMILYhis-
Blood...
"Ah..." She was bleeding again. Brown eyes glanced at her hand, blood dripping from the deep crescents her nails, tiny bits of red resting at the edges of them, had unknowingly created. She stared intently as the droplets that flowed thick and scarlet in her veins grew bigger, gathering, and sliding down her palm and trickling down her arm. It flowed like a lazy river, slow and steady. Such a sight to behold. To think something such as this was what kept beings alive...
It...
It was so...
Before she could think anymore, Hisoka sat up quickly before it could touch her bed linen or her clothes, grabbing a rag from the bed shelf. She started from the bottom, sliding upward before setting the rag against the wounds in order to erase the evidence. Letting out another sigh, deeper and longer than before, she shook her head getting away from such thoughts. Not now. This was not the time for that.
Not this time.
Not now.
Shoving the blanket off with her legs, Hisoka rolled over and got up from the bed to head towards the small balcony. Opening the sliding glass door, she stepped outside, feeling the fresh night air wrap around her. Taking a deep breath, she let it enter and cool down her heated body, before deciding to lean over on the rail (she really needed to get a chair or two out here) that overlooked the casual garden that occupied the center of the small courtyard that was free for them to use . Hisoka seemed to be using it a lot lately to look at the moon and whatever stars were able to shine through the city lights. It was a little nice thing to help her think. Whenever there was a cool breeze, that made it just a tad better as well.
But that still didn't make up for the lack of sleep. God, she was tired...
Hisoka truly hated to admit it but she was... scared of what she'd see if she were to close her eyes. She couldn't remember physically what the dreams were, but she knew they weren't good. She knew what they were about or at least a part of them... She only wanted a dreamless sleep. Just once.
But no.
Not this time.
Who honestly knew...
Hisoka stayed like that for a while, just staring up at the sky. It was a song for the beholder's eyes, a midnight painting. Another cloudy night, the rolling grey clouds floated over the stars they occasionally concealed along with hiding the slim crescent moon in its full glory behind them. The stars, ones that greeted their ancestors, twinkled in a series of varied brightness and dimness. She liked staring up at the sky. It was a simple activity to pass the time. She could think here, alone with her thoughts like always - 'You're never alone. I've always been here.' - or just let her mind wander into nothingness.
Just a peaceful pastime...
Yeah...
Peaceful...
Glancing downward, she frowned and stood up straight when she caught movement in her peripheral vision, raising an eyebrow when she caught someone climbing from one balcony to the next one over. What in the world... As a cloud moved away from the moon, its dim light allowed her to see the person had blonde hair in a certain style that only belonged to Aoyama-san.
What was he doing?
The rather flamboyant boy jumped over to his balcony, landing in his usual pose before he snapped his head up towards her so fast, she wondered if he got whiplash. She frowned as they stared at each other. Aoyama-san...
She didn't really know much about Aoyama-san except that he was from France, liked cheese, and didn't really get involved with others. He usually ate his lunch alone and never really participated in most social situations. Hisoka could only count on two hands the conversations she had with Aoyama-san and even then, they were short. Hisoka never went out of her way to talk to the teen, the other only coming to her for a question or to tell her a random fact, figuring he was one who preferred to be alone than with others.
Aoyama-san still had his rarely ever-changing closed smile though he gave her an unidentifiable stare before he winked at her, posing differently with a peace sign near his winking eye. Hisoka only gave him a confused look as he held a finger to his lip and slipped back inside like a little shiny snake.
No really... What the hell just happened?!
What was he doing on Midoriya-san's balcony?
You know what... She didn't want to know what was happening. This seemed to be between Aoyama-san and Midoriya-san. There was no reason to get involved with how much was already on her plate.
With a sigh, she went back inside falling face-first onto her pillow with a groan.
Hours later, sometime in the early afternoon and with a stack of empty plates, Hisoka stepped outside her room and down to the kitchen. Grabbing the apron, she began to cook.
Location: In Front of Heights Alliance, South Side of U.A. High School Campus, Northern Musutafu, South of Tokyo, Honshu, Japan
Date: October 18, 20XX
"Today was so hard!" Ashido complained, hands thrown up in the air as she walked with the other girls in her class.
Jiro let out a hum, a tired but thinking expression on her face. "Training did run longer than usual."
"I wonder why..." Yaoyorozu wondered thoughtfully.
"Yeah! But it was worth it! We got to work on our super moves with Cementoss-sensei!" Hagakure cheered, jumping a bit.
"That is true. We should be thankful for all the help he gave us today."
"Yeah!"
The girls continued to chatter about today's training as they headed towards Heights Alliance, the rest of the class scattered around them mixing with the other students of the school. Tsuyu simply listened, letting out a sigh as she stared up ahead, walking with Fumikage on her other side. Training had done a number on her, on all of them. All she wanted to do was see Hisoka and crawl into bed together with her after eating some of her delicious food. But she knew that wasn't going to happen. Hisoka was likely still sick and who knew when she'd come out of her room... Tsuyu (and more or less everyone in the class) wished she'd just get better.
Black eyes looked up when she heard her name called. "Tsuyu. She'll be fine," Fumikage told her, a knowing look in his eyes.
"Yeah but I just can't help but worry. She hasn't answered any of our messages yet."
"You know how Hisoka can get. She won't answer messages for at least a week sometimes," he added nonchalantly with a yawn, muttering an 'excuse me' under his breath afterward.
"How... often does she do that?" Todoroki interjected, lightly frowning.
"At least every few months."
"But why?"
"Everyone has their own little quirks or ticks," Fumikage said with a shrug. "There's nothing to worry about. Knowing Hisoka, she'll be out and about by now. She's never down for long."
Tsuyu side glanced at him. "You really think so? Aizawa-sensei said she's rather sick..."
Fumikage nodded as they finally approached the tall, dark wooden double front doors to their home. "I-"
"Do you hear that?" Hagakure exclaimed, jumping and pressing an ear to the door. "Sounds like... humming?!"
Some of their classmates stopped behind the large group, others pressing their ears to the doors until a very annoyed Bakugo had enough of his annoying classmates acting like fools, who weren't moving the hell out the way, and kicked the doors open.
Location: Kitchen Area, First Floor of Heights Alliance, South Side of U.A. High School Campus, Northern Musutafu, South of Tokyo, Honshu, Japan
Date: October 18, 20XX
Hisoka moved around the kitchen with grace, grabbing a ladle to dish out the large pot full of curry along with spoons and plates, hearing the ding from the two large rice cookers signaling the rice was finished, as she let out soft hums - distractiondon'twanttothinkjustwanttomovedeny - as brown eyes glanced at the clock nearby - foodfeelbetterdon'tletothersworryneveralone - frowning lightly. She turned the burner off, the food cooked. They were rather late...
As she was moving to grab the spoon to mix the curry once more, her head whipped towards the doors as they were kicked open, and without thinking, her hand moved swiftly. Grabbing the closest thing, a fork, she threw it at whoever entered first. Hisoka's eyes widened a bit in surprise as Bakugo-san ducked in time, except for the four centimeters from the top of his head as it got itself stuck in the door. A few blond stands floated to the ground seconds later. Red eyes were staring at her in shock before they swiftly turned into annoyance.
"Ah..."
"You need better aim, One Eye." Bakugo-san scowled, scoffing.
Hisoka raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "And yet there's hair on the ground, Bakugo-san."
"Lucky shot," he hissed.
She shrugged. "Whatever makes you sleep at night."
Bakugo-san's Quirk activated, mini explosions going off in his hands as he took a step towards her. "Ha?! You wanna go at it?!" Others began to trickle in, wearily avoiding the fork that had appeared out of nowhere, while others gave it a confused look.
"Maybe another time. Right now there's food here and I am sure you're hungry." Right on cue, as if to betray him, Bakugo-san's stomach growled. "See?"
"Shut up, One Eye!"
"I have two eyes." She made a motion to her two eyes shown, her hair tied back to keep it out of the way. "Maybe you need yours checked if you keep on saying I've only got one..."
The short, spiky ash-blond haired teen growled, about to say something as he took another step forward when Kirishima-san placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. Hisoka didn't catch what the red head said to his friend as she became distracted by the others. And Shoto, being the last to step inside, got the fork out of the door. That was nice of him. Why did he give it such a weary look though? It was just a fork...
"Welcome back, everyone," she finally told them. "I've made dinner so go and wash up. I am sure you are all hungry. There's a lot of food here!" Hisoka set down some plates on the table before she took in the silence with a blink. Tilting her head, she asked, "What is it?"
Hisoka let out a squeak (that she'd forever deny happening until the end of time) as she was ambushed by three girls, Ashido-san, Hagakure-san, and Uraraka-san, tackling her to the floor, hugging her as they exclaimed their worries. She let out a soft groan as she landed on her tailbone hard. That was going to be bruised in the morning...
"You had us all worried, Hiso-chan!" Hagakure-san exclaimed, shoes tapping against the ground as her legs swung up and down.
Ashido-san buried her chin against her stomach, grinning up at her. "I'm sooooo happy you're better! We can hang out again!" Hisoka could see that she was unhappy though and Hisoka knew why.
No... No, she wasn't...
"Why didn't you answer any of our messages?!" Uraraka-san's eyes were filled with concern as she sat up on her knees. "Were you that sick?"
"I'm sorry..." Hisoka mumbled, half deflecting the question half answering it, before nodding. "I didn't realize I worried you all so much."
"You're better and that's all that matters."
"Yeah!" Sero-san nodded, grin widening. "You... are better, right?"
"I am," Hisoka answered.
"Then you'll be back in class then!" Kaminari-san gave her a thumbs up.
"That's good to hear!" Ojiro-san said, tail wagging slowly as the fuzzy tip slipped from a pouting Kaminari-san's hands. Looked like he was petting it again... There was worry in his eyes as well before they brightened up. He offered her a hand which she gladly took, the others getting up around her.
Others gathered, chatting to her. Sato-san mentioned an interest in her recipe and asked if they could swap some again later. Midoriya-san expressed his happiness before he began to mumble to himself, taking a notebook out of nowhere and beginning to furiously write something in it. Shoji-san nodded to her before he left to go put his stuff away. Bakugo-san had already left as well. Aoyama posed for her - she guessed it was his way of telling her he was glad to see her or something - before wandering off too. Mineta-san had given her a look with narrowed eyes, walking away as well. Kirishima-san came up to her right, punching her lightly in the arm, telling her not to scare him like that again.
She felt something squeeze her heart as a warm and fuzzy feeling entered inside. Had she really worried them all that much?
Before she could apologize once more, Iida-san clapped his hands, exclaiming, "Okay, give her some space everyone. We don't want her to get sick again after just getting better! So, go clean up and come back here to eat!" He made that chopping motion he usually did as the people around dispersed to their rooms, leaving only a few behind.
Momo stepped forward, grasping Hisoka's hand inside her own. "I'm so glad you are feeling so much better, Hisoka-chan. I know the others have already said it but you had us all so worried when you didn't answer our messages or wouldn't eat the first two days..."
Hisoka hadn't been hungry... She felt bad for wasting so much food they had made her...
Shoto came up to her left. "But that doesn't matter anymore. What matters is that you're here now."
Iida-san pressed his glasses up against the bridge of his nose before crossing his arms over his chest. "There's a lot of things you've missed, so you can use my notes to catch up. There are also a few things announced that I'll explain to you after dinner." With that, he nodded to her and left on the spin of his heel when she nodded back to him, catching up to the waiting Midoriya-san.
"You can use mine too, if you want," Shoto added, following after him.
"Mine as well. I've also got a wonderful tea my mother has recently sent me that'll help boost your immune system so I'd like you to have some during dinner if you don't mind."
"I'd love to have some," she told the taller teen.
"Wonderful! I'll go grab it now!" Momo smiled brightly at her before leaving temporarily to her room.
Hisoka watched her leave before glancing back at the two left, staring at her. She stared back. "I-"
Her eyes widened slightly when Tsuyu pulled her into a hug, her bag dropping to the floor with a thunk, as her arms wrapped around her, head falling onto her shoulder. "Idiot..." Tsuyu mumbled as Hisoka heard Fumi let out a huff and a snort, half of his mouth quirking upward.
"Yeah..." Hisoka agreed, wrapping her arms around her. She stared at Fumi, his knowing eyes telling her everything she needed to know. He knew she hadn't been sick. Sometimes Hisoka wondered if he knew her better then she knew herself... He knew but didn't say anything and for that, she was grateful. With a nod from him, he left the two girls alone.
"You had us, me, worried."
"I know."
"I'm mad at you..."
"Ah..."
With that, Tsuyu let go, giving her a stern look as she gripped her hand firmly. "You're staying with me tonight." She squeezed it once.
Hisoka's smile slightly, squeezing back. "Mmmmkay..."
Location: Common Room, First Floor of Heights Alliance, South Side of U.A. High School Campus, Northern Musutafu, South of Tokyo, Honshu, Japan
Date: October 18, 20XX
After dinner was done, everyone's bellies filled and the dishes sitting in the drying rack, Hisoka found herself sitting on the ground in front of the low coffee table with her own notebooks, one for each subject, and a stack of missed homework near her. In front of her were her math notebook and a few other notebooks of her classmates as her pencil began to scratch away, filling the previously blank page with equations and notes. She had already filled her history and English notebooks, those put off to the side. The TV played in the background. Gathered around her were her classmates lazing on the couches except for Bakugo, who was sleeping, and the other interns who had supplementary classes. Hisoka could only guess that she wasn't stuck with supplementary classes because she was usually able to keep up with everything in a timely manner.
More or less.
There were still a lot of copying notes and homework to get done.
It was then she had learned about the Hero Training on their Super Move (She never really had a concrete one, really just combined some mixed martial art moves she already knew. She should really come up with something. At least one... Eh. She'd figure one out soon enough.) and the Culture Festival from Iida-san that was going to be held in a month. Iida-san had commented on how since the Sports Festival was for the Hero Department, the Culture Festival was for the other departments to stand out. It was also a way for them to destress after everything that's been happening, revolving around the Hero Department and all that.
During class, they held a vote on what they had wanted to do, from a maid cafe to a haunted house or even some food stand like mochi, takoyaki, or even handmade soba. Unable to decide, they had tonight to choose something or else Aizawa-sensei threatened they would do a public lecture.
Brown eyes glanced to her right, watching a flustered Iida-san tap away at her computer. "There's going to be something... A hint or some sign on what we can do..." he mumbled under his breath. Letting out a sigh, he leaned back, staring up at the ceiling.
Hisoka set down her pencil. "What exactly are you looking for?"
"Well, with how much stress Aizawa-sensei mentioned the other departments must be feeling, I'm trying to figure out a way to help them vent that stress. But I can't really think of anything. We've got to come up with a good plan." Iida-san drummed his fingers against the arm of the couch.
"I agree... We're all aspiring to be Heroes, after all, but they shouldn't have to go through this much stress. If that's the case, it would be a tall order for us to satisfy U.A. students, who have experienced the cafeteria lunch rush, with food even if some of us are good cooks," Momo explained.
Sato-san sighed, staring off mournfully. "So, food-related themes are a no go then?" He crossed his arms over his chest.
Momo nodded. "It would honestly depend on the individual. We need to be thinking about providing a service for other classes as a whole."
"When you put it that way, I guess you're right..." Shoji-san rubbed his chin with a thoughtful expression. "It wouldn't be right to select a theme based on our own desires.
"It pains me to admit it, but we're no match for the lunch rush no matter how good the food would turn out." Sero-san shrugged, letting out a defeated huff, as Sato-san nodded in agreement.
Hakagure-san began, "So that means..."
Momo continued, "Rather than serving food, we'll be delivering some sort of experience... and thinking back to our list from before..." She listed off, "A maid cafe, petting zoo, or a haunted house?"
"If we actually did a zoo, sanitation would be a problem," Hisoka added absentmindedly, pencil moving back to take notes.
"That would have been totally fun too!" Hakagure-san pouted, "Too bad. Why not a skit or a play then?"
"I don't think they'd want to watch a bunch of amateurs on stage. That'd just heighten their stress even more," Hisoka informed them. Mumbles went around with sighs of disappointment, unhappy with being unable to agree on anything.
Ashido-san leaned back, legs bouncing and thumbs playing with one another in her lap, muttering "It'd be really fun to dance with everyone..."
Shoto stood up, walking past her. "Yeah, dancing sounds good, don't you think?"
"Wow..." Ashido-san's eyebrow popped up. "You're the last person I was expecting to back me up on this!"
"Can I borrow this for a sec?" Shoto asked Iida-san who nodded. Crouching, he turned the laptop toward him and typed away. "There was that one thing... I forgot what it was called but it's where everyone's fooling around, dancing, having fun." After a few moments, he turned the screen towards everyone. "Something like that." There was a concert playing with music and lights and a large crowd dancing below a stage.
That was unexpected of Shoto to suggest... "An interesting idea."
"When did you become a party person, Todoroki!?" Mineta asked in shock.
"I didn't. I just thought Iida's idea was going in the right direction. We should put on something where everyone can go loose and enjoy themselves. It's a fitting idea for the occasion, don't you think?"
"Where did you get this kind of idea?!"
"Nowhere really..." Shoto shrugged. "It was a suggestion from my experience at the Provisional License training course."
"What kind of class were you taking?" Sato-san asked, looking at the two-toned haired boy in a new light. Hisoka wanted to know as well.
"I see..." Iida-san's eyes lighting up as a plan began to form.
"Well, if we're going to be doing something like that then we're going to need to learn how to dance," Hisoka started.
"I can teach you guys!" Mina-san shouted, raising a hand at a dancing Aoyama-san who kept doing the same move.
Aoyama-san posed, winking at them all. "Two step!"
"Whoa!" Hagakure-san exclaimed in surprise. "Earlier he was a complete novice with some weird moves, but in just a day he's already mastered that dance! Ashido's instructions are the real deal!"
Hisoka added, "We also need music. Dance is about rhythm, after all."
"If we're talking about MUSIIIIIIIC!"
Hisoka looked up with her class at Jiro-san. "Wh-what?" She blushed at the sudden attention on her, headphone jacks rising up.
"We'll put on a live performance with Jiro's instruments!" Hagakure-san shouted, jumping up to the music-loving girl excitedly.
"Hold on a minute!" Jiro-san held up her hands.
"Why?!" Hagakure-san waved her arms up and down. "You're amazing at playing and performing, Jiro! And it's always so much fun when we're playing together!"
"I mean, Ashido... and everyone else, too... You guys all have amazing hobbies that are really useful to you as Heroes, you know?" Gripping her headphone jacks, she tapped them lightly against one another. Black eyes glanced away. "As for me, it really is just a simple hobby. And honestly, it's not something that I like bragging about to others..."
"So that was it!" Kaminari-san pointed at her, grinning. "That's why you were actin' all weird this afternoon!" Walking up to Jiro-san, he told her enthusiastically, "Being able to play all those instruments like that is super cool!"
"Jiro-san..." Hisoka set down her pencil, placing her hands on the coffee table to help push her up, and walked over to the girl. "It's your decision to do this or not. But know this, your music is something that puts smiles on your friends' faces and it can put a lot more smiles on a lot of other people's faces."
"I..."
"Don't dismiss such a thing as a simple hobby with something so useful. It's a perfect hobby for a Hero to have." Hisoka gave her a smile, making black eyes widen.
She let out a groan, dropping to a crouch as she messed with her hair. "God damn, Hisoka... Were you always so good at words?!" She glanced up at her. "After being told all that, it wouldn't be... rockin' of me to still refuse, huh?"
"Maybe. Maybe not." Hisoka shrugged before reaching out her hand to the other. "But if it's you, I know it'll be the best concert this school has ever seen." Jiro-san took her hand.
"You really think so?"
Pulling the other girl up, she nodded. "I do."
Jiro-san's cheeks heated up, raising both arms up without letting go of Hisoka's hand. "Then let's do it!"
"Then it's decided! Class 1-A will put on a music and dance club with live performances!" Iida-san shouted as the class cheered.
Location: Unknown
Red. So much red. "Wh-what..."
This was all her fault. She had to do something about all this. There was just so much coming out!
Dangerous. Everything was wrong.
She tried to, really, she had! Yet why could it not help? Just inky darkness all around her. She called again.
Nothing.
Nothing at all.
"You will be scattered-" (So weak. Something was wrong with them... They felt tired.) Something was happening.
"Ehehehehe. You won't be able to move at all when I'm around, girly." They were sinking - floating just above the line, mouth open as they tried to breathe more and more, arms and legs unable to move before sinking to the bottom - and yet they couldn't move fully.
"Why not just give in?" No! They had to run! They wouldn't be able to take them! (Move... MoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMoveMove! Move! They couldn't have herhim!)
Something grabbed her. (Madness- It felt like it was never going to end. It was unsure, but could one outrun this? Some have said you cannot outrun insanity; it was like your own shadow. It was always there - a constant companion beside them. Mocking-) "I just want you two to get along."
Go away!
"I can't." Darkness.
Crack...
STOP IT! JUST STOP!
REDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDREDRED-
"No."
Author's Note: What do you all think of the voice? I'm curious. No, I really am! Do you like it? Should it stay or should it appear only every now and then? Should it have a name? Etc. Etc. Bakugo knows better than to kick open a door. Or not really. This is Bakugo we're all talking about. Expldo boy. Lol. He might have lost more than just a few strands of hair if he hadn't of dodge it. That aim though! Hisoka you got mad arm strength for it to get stuck in the door!
I hope you enjoyed the chapter!
Please review, it is nourishment for me!