Sorry about all the flashbacks. But it is kind of neccesary, well for me at least.

Also please give me feedback. I have over 20 people that have me on their fave stories and/or story alert list. SO I know that I can get more reviews then I've been getting. ;

"Jera! You better hurry!" I heard Anthony call from downstairs.

"For what?" I whined as I looked up from my book.

"We're going on a hunting trip today." This hit me like a ton of bricks. I was hungry. Even though, unlike the others, I couldn't tell that for a fact by looking at my eyes. I could definately tell. But, I was afraid. I'd never been hunting before. What was I supposed to do? I hadn't even been outside this house since I first came.

"I don't have anything to put my clothes in," I said, making it my excuse. Someone, probably Bethany, tossed a small bag into my room. I sighed and got up. Carelessly, I put some clothes into the bag. I could always match out the outfits later. Then I picked up the bag and walked downstairs to join the others.

Gabriel smiled at me. "Read my mind, and I'll hurt you," I growled menacingly. Every time I did that, I surprised myself. It was a very odd thing to do. Yet I did it automatically. Bethany a cooing to Anthony. "Ok, let's go," I said. It made me feel uncomfortable to see the two together. It always made me think about Mark and caused my heart to ache, despite how little of time we had been going out.

"Alright, alright," Bethany said, still looking at Anthony. I rolled my eyes and dragged her out the door. Anthony drove with Bethany next to him. Gabriel and I sat in back trying to keep ourselves entertained with silly human games. I was surprised by how fast Anthony drove.

"Are you going to slow down?" I asked nervously. They all laughed. I pouted, not seeing the humor in the situation.

Bethany turned around to face me. "Just wait until you get behind the wheel as a vampire. You'll drvie just as fast."

I scoffed. No way would I be so careless. Would I? This whole vampire thing was very confusing. Gabriel started up again with the games shortly after this. Unwillingly, I played along.

Soon we pulled up to some forest. "Where are we?" I asked.

"Our hunting grounds," Gabriel said matter-of-factly. I shuddered. This whole thing was still so bizarre to me.

"Are we staying in a hotel?"

"Of course, but we need to feed you first so you don't go mad in a hotel full of humans." I saw what Gabriel meant. That would be really bad. Anthony parked and we all got out of the car. In a flash we were all in a deep part of the forest, where only serious hikers came. So said Bethany.

I stood puzzled. What was I supposed to do? I looked up at the canopy where some light shone down on my skin making my sparkle a little. Quickly I retreated to the shadows. "Ok, how does this work?"

"Bethany and I will show you," Gabriel said quietly. "Anthony will restrain you, but after we demostrate. You can do as you please." He smiled.

I sniffed the air lightly. What was that smell? Something told me that if I was still human, I would have hated the smell. But I was a vampire, and it was incredible. It's vague dry taste teased my tongue. Just then, two hikers appeared over the hills. They were the source. I must have it! My mind cried.

Gabriel's eyes widen. "Anthony, hold her back!" he hissed quietly. Just as I was about to lunged in order to pounce on them, Anthony restrained me. I growled inaudibly to the hikers.

"Watch," he whispered. So I did, while trying to struggle free from his hold. Gabriel and Bethany walked directly up to the two men. They smiled at them kindly, but then Gabriel and Bethany jumped on them. Despite his size, Gabriel was able to knock the taller of the two to the ground instantly. He pressed his mouth against the man's skin and sucked him dry of blood. Bethany did the same thing.

Wanting some, I growled. "Don't worry," Anthony. "You and I will go off and find some." I nodded my head eagerly. Then we both slunk away deeper into the forest. In a short time, we spotted a family of six. Perfect, three for each.

"Can we?" I asked excitedly. He nodded his head. I smiled and followed his lead. Instantly we enclosed the family. First I pounced on the father, while Anthony busied himself with the mother. Anxiously, I bit into the man's flesh. My mouth was flooded with the wonderful dry taste of his blood. Behind me, I heard the children shriek in fear. Yet they didn't run.

I was soon done and turned around to find Anthony snapping his mouth closed violently on one of the boys. I scanned my choices and settled on the oldest of the children. He was a boy and of course tried desperately to fight me off. The other two kids left cheered wildly for their brother. It was truly pathetic that they thought he would win.

One of the two left screamed in fear as in no doubt, Anthony attacked one of the two. Finally, I pushed myself on top of the boy. In a brief moment of sanity, I recognized his face. But where was he from? He seemed to stammer out my name, but it was too late; I plunged in killing him. I stood up and wiped my mouth.

There was one more. She was a little child. Her back was pressed against the trunk of a tree. She hugged her knees and looked at me in fear. I was instantly there and bit her. Her scream, just made me want to drink more. Soon, she and the rest of her family was dead.

Anthony and I disposed of the bodies so they would never be found. That's when I noticed something was different. I heard Anthony speaking, but his mouth wasn't opening. She did a good job for her first time.

"Thank you," I said politely.

"You heard that?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "My God, you are a mind reader like Gabriel!"

I sobbed uncontrollably as I told Jacob. "Jacob, I killed a family. And continued killing many others for years." His eyes were wide in shock. This is what I was afraid of.

"Oh, Jera, it's all right. You don't do that anymore."

"But Jacob I was a monster. I still am."

"No, no you aren't."

"Yes I am. And I figured out why that boy looked so familiar. It was Mark. The guy I was going out with before my parents' death." I gripped Jacob's shoulders and buried my face in his chest. "I'm a monster," I sobbed.

"You aren't," he said firmly, starting to shake.

"I am; that's why you werewolves exist, to destroy, us, the monsters. Why don't you destroy me?" I wailed.

"Because I loved you, and you aren't a monster. You did horrible things, but that wasn't your fault. Ok? It was out of control. So please don't call yourself a monster. I've done some horrible things as well."

"You are just saying that," I said coldly.

"No, I'm not. You know about everything between me and Bella right?" I nodded my head. "When she left me after Alice came back...I-I killed a man." He started shaking more. "And I bit one, she became a werewolf. But Sam banished her and I don't know what's become of her now." I looked up at him. A hot tear hit my face. Jacob was crying.

We embraced each other tighter and cried for our past mistakes. Jacob no longer shook, numb from my iron cold skin. It truly wasn't fair. Everything in the world had brought this to us, not ourselves. Or so we thought. It could have been both of us just feeling sorry for ourselves, but either way we were comforted. After all, we were in the arms of the one we loved the most.

Eventually, we both calmed down. We laid on the bed, Jacob holding me in his arms. I snuggled closer to him and closed my eyes. It felt almost like I was asleep.

Some of you guys are probably are wondering when Alice's...disturbing...vision will come true. Well don't worry. Though I wonder why you might. I know exactly where I'm putting it in the story. AND IT WON'T BE GRAPHIC. So don't worry about any of that junk. If any of you have seen the movie Chicago, it would be more along that lines