It Wasn't Fair

Gabriella Moushigo

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A Month Later…

Tifa was scrubbing the bar down angrily. One of her customers came in right before the bar closed, munched on a basket of chips and salsa… before downing so many tequila shots that he puked. Of course, he didn't have the decency to throw up on the floor, where it wouldn't have been so gross. He spewed up over the bar, onto the counter and onto all of her clean glasses and utensils. At least she had a dishwasher now. After she finished whipping the mess up she opted to throw the rag out into the trash. She then sat at one of the booths in her bar and placed her head down on the cool surface.

The children were gone now. Then again, they had been gone since before all this Deepground business happened.

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Denzel found out he had an aunt still, on his mother's side. She just walked into the bar during business hours about two months ago, desperate. Avalanche's exploits were very well known and all of the members at some point were on the news or in the paper. The woman just happened to catch a glimpse of her nephew on the front page. She lifted the paper up into Tifa's face with a pleading voice, wondering if the boy, Denzel, was still in her care.

Tifa, being protective as always, was going to have to be convinced to let her young charge go with this woman. Denzel, hearing the noise, came downstairs to see what was happening. Upon seeing the woman he began to cry and ran to her, "Auntie!" The woman bent down and held onto the boy, both clutching at each other and visibly shaking.

"I'm so sorry," She repeated over and over again. "I'm so sorry, I couldn't find you."

It was more than Tifa could stand, her eyes welled up and she began to cry. She was happy for Denzel, but also, selfishly, a bit sad for herself.

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Tifa opened her eyes, forehead still resting on the table. She was sure her skin was going to be red once she lifted her head. She folded her arms underneath her face and rested her eyes once more.

Denzel was gone. She still got letters of thanks from his aunt and funny pictures Denzel drew in class. Denzel and his aunt hadn't had to deal with Deepground, being about one hour driving distance away from any one town. For that she should be glad.

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It took Tifa a week to realize that Marlene wouldn't be with her much longer either. Tifa loved the little girl and wouldn't hesitate to put her life on the line for her, but she couldn't do this anymore. It felt like she was being used in a way. She was put in charge of these children for so long that she wrapped her heart around them like they were her own. It was a bit like borrowing Marlene and Denzel only to have the parents take them back after she had grown so attached.

It wasn't fair.

She called Barret and asked gently if he wouldn't mind taking Marlene from her. He asked her if anything was wrong and she politely told him that everything was alright. She just needed some time to straiten things out. Not to mention that she would baby-sit whenever he needed.

The man had been shirking his duty for long too, he knew that well enough. He came by about two weeks later and took his little daughter.

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Even if it was a self inflicted wound, Tifa couldn't help but hurt as she had to see her young charge off. Again, another child was saved. Tifa had a hard enough time trying to escape Edge herself without having to drag two very scared children out of town with her.

Vincent, who visited her often, questioned if she was alright in his own way. The times he talked consisted of him making very clipped statements and dancing around the subject to see if she wanted to talk. He was a kind man underneath it all. He made things easier to bear.

Her thoughts brought her to happier times, times that Vincent had spent time with her.

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Tifa remembered how if she left a bowl of cherries next to Vincent at the bar, they would end up disappearing little by little until the bowl was empty. She looked a bit confused at first, then noticed that Vincent and changed seats so he could sit next to the other bowl filled with sugary cherries. She would raise her eyebrow at him and he would just stare blankly back at her before he couldn't help it and his eyes crinkled into a hidden smile. She teasingly called him a mooch and told him to order something before she kicked him out. He laughed a bit in his gruff voice, she liked that sound.

She teased him by giving him a cherry soda one day. It was his 'regular' now. It was coke of course, with the red cherry syrup from the jar added, and then she put about ten cherries in the glass for him to nibble on. She kept hiss glass full while he was there. She found it kept him from just downing all the cherries at the bar. He would sometimes come behind the bar, to her surprise, before grabbing a nip of rum to spike the drink with.

He would sometimes put the stems in his mouth and tie them into knots, leaving it on the counter as a present of sorts. It would always remind Tifa of that night Yuffie had visited the bar. Yuffie had suggested a game Tifa was all too familiar with, people threw the idea at her all the time. This time, she felt compelled to join in the game. It was just her, Yuffie and Vincent after all.

Yuffie said that if you could tie a cherry stem with your tongue, then it proved you were a good kisser. Whoever finished first, therefore, must be the best kisser.

"Ready, set, go!" Laughter peeled out of Yuffie's mouth as she placed a long cherry stem into her mouth before Tifa could even pick one up.

"Hey! That's not fair!" Tifa cried before stuffing one in her mouth trying to catch up.

Tifa and Yuffie giggled as they tried with all their might to tie a knot, making faces at each other. Vincent rolled his eyes at them more than once at their annoying laughter. He finally commented about what he thought of 'their game' after he sipped the muscadine wine in front of him. The drink he used to break up the monotony of a rum and coke. Tifa had brewed a few of these bottles herself. After having sampled it, he had to buy them all, liking the sweet taste. They would remain behind the counter until he came back again and he asked for a drink.

Yuffie, thinking he was such a party-pooper, ribbed him, saying that he was an old man and probably couldn't kiss at all after all that time in that dirty old coffin.

He surprised them both by stuffing a cherry stem in his mouth, they could not see his mouth as he worked it into a perfect knot and tossed it onto the counter.

"Wow! You must be a great kisser!" Yuffie practically shrieked, laughing. Perhaps she was hyper or maybe she had too much to drink.

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Things were good as long as he was still there talking to her. He had started coming to her about a year after the battle with Sephiroth and Jenova. He was quiet, but she enjoyed his company. Little by little, he would talk about himself after everyone left. She, the typical bartender listened to his stories. She greedily kept all his tales to herself, feeling so privileged to know him like no one else did.

She liked how he ate all the cherries in the bowl if she wasn't watchful. She liked how he would spear five olives on his talon like fingers and popped them one by one into his mouth while he read a book. She liked how when he was nervous or wanted to tell her something, his leg would twitch underneath the bar. The metal on his boots would click against the foot rest every time he jumped his foot. He began to get impatient for the bar to close some nights and would sometimes do all three at once.

She remembered that night he was drunk… when he said… Tifa let her thoughts slip off from that happy train of thought to think about reality for a change.

But now, now he wasn't here. She wasn't supposed to be here either. He was supposed to have come back already. She lifted her head off her arms, her forehead tingling and she knew it had to be red from pressing down on it.

Tifa was patient, but he was taking a while, and she was lonely. A month had gone by and he still hadn't returned from the cave.

Tifa remembered a girl by the name of Shelke who was assisting the WRO attack on Deepground. She had gone to find Vincent while Tifa made her final preparations to sell the bar. Tifa half wondered now if she should have just gone herself. Shelke might have looked very young, but she was of age… not to mention she imbued with Lucrecia's memories. That's the thing that frightened her the most.

She wondered if Vincent would ever come back now. Yes, Shelk wasn't Lucrecia, but still. She could understand if Vincent was tempted to stay with her, even if she was just a shadow of his former love. He seemed the type, as honorable as he was he was also very wrapped up in his past.

Tifa could still remember how Vincent talked about Lucrecia. It was sad listening to him sometimes, he disliked his past very much, but never felt anything but happiness after he met Lucrecia and wouldn't change a thing despite it all. She felt a little jealous. Not of Lucrecia per se, but the way he talked about her. She would listen to Cloud talk the same way about Aerith. They both spoke as if they were privileged to even look at them much less know them.

She wondered if anyone said the same thing about her sometimes. She wondered if she would ever be so loved like that.

She also wondered if Vincent would keep his promise now, her heart felt a little sting at that thought. Would he even tell her if he changed his mind? She did give him permission… Oh! Why did I say that? She pulled her hair in frustration. Ugh! Don't think that way! She berated herself, fighting the silent tears that the thought had brought on.

Her normally chipper mode was suffering, God she hated feeling this way. Tifa fell asleep with that, her head pillowed on her arms, she was exhausted.

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Hello everyone, I hope you enjoyed this little delve into Tifa's life after DoC. I promise that the story will pick up after I've built up enough momentum. Part of me thinks that these chapters feel like one shots. I was originally tempted to publish them all separately, but since they were related I didn't really want to do that.

Unfortunately, I think how I write sometimes really hurts my story. The abrupt changes in scenes give the chapters a jerky quality that I'm not too fond of. I hope you'll forgive me though, and allow me a few indulgences. I've started adding lines like "One month later" to help with scene changes. I hope it helps even though is sounds corny!

Read and review!