CHAPTER 16

Now that the fighting was over, the adrenaline pumping through Miguel, Sam and Hawk's veins finally ebbed, and they finally turned to each other, Sam and Hawk staring at Miguel, who was looking at them with an unreadable expression on his face. A long silence overcame them as they took in the presence of the other. A couple of moments later however, they broke the silence and motionlessness as Sam walked towards him, wrapping her arms around him as tightly as she could and pulling him into a crushing embrace. Miguel, who had been knocked in the sides a couple of times during the fight, had to stifle a groan in pain as he felt his ribs crunch.

"Thank God, you're okay." Sam murmured, tears threatening to spill over her eyes.

All of the fear and anxiety she had felt since she couldn't find him after the tournament finally faded a little. When she had found out where he was, who he was with, she very nearly had a heart attack. She had immediately pictured the worse - that he was either in grave danger or had become one of the gang members himself - but having him in her arms, safe and sound, made all of that worry disappear. However, that emotion was replaced with anger, and she quickly let go of Miguel, and then shoved Miguel backwards into the wall behind him.

"What the HELL is wrong with you?! You just run off to Mexico and don't tell anyone?!" Sam shouted. "Do you have any idea how much worry you caused?!"

"I'm… I'm really sorry, Sam. I just… I needed to go and I…"

"You needed to go?! To one of the murder capitals of the world?! You're insane!" Sam exclaimed, before yanking Miguel into another tight embrace. "God, I'm so glad you're okay!"

Sam went through this insane cycle, flitting from anger to relief and then back to anger about 10 times before she finally calmed down enough for the three to walk back onto the main road and back towards Hawk's car. Sam's hand was tightly in Miguel, Miguel protectively draping an arm around her shoulders too, making sure that no other sons of bitches tried anything. Not that they would at this point. Gossip was the only thing that spread in this town faster than narcotics. So the streets were dead quiet as they walked down the main road and eventually over to the side-road where Hawk had parked his car.

"Miguel, can I ask you something?" Sam asked quietly as they walked along the street together.

"Yeah, hit me." Miguel replied.

"Why did you leave so suddenly?" Sam murmured in a voice not much louder than a whisper. "Even if you were hell bent on leaving and we couldn't talk you out of it, you could've stayed until after the tournament. I needed you after. We all did."

Miguel sighed and looked down, staring at his feet and not looking Sam in the eye.

"Hey, yeah, look, I'm really sorry about the way I left. It was a real dick move to just sneak away. I just… I knew that if I talked to you or my family or anyone, I'd be talked out of it and I'd lose the courage to go."

"Yeah, and that's a good thing! You'd get to be at home, enjoying your summer. Not in this crazy city!" Sam exclaimed. Miguel shrugged.

"This place isn't that bad." Miguel mumbled, to which Sam laughed in disbelief.

"Really? Need I remind you of what literally JUST happened like 15 minutes ago?" Sam remarked. Miguel nodded.

"I mean, sure, it's rough around the edges but when you get to know it, trust me it's a whole lot better."

"Yeah, right." Sam scoffed, just as they reached Hawk's car. "Alright, you need to go pick up your things from wherever you're staying before we go back to L.A?"

Miguel looked at her, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"Huh?" He grunted, perplexed. "Sam, I… I'm not coming back with you guys."

Both Sam and Hawk's faces paled slightly in shock, and as Hawk watched Sam's face fill with anger and upset, he knew that he needed to get out of this situation ASAP.

"Okay, well I can recognise a ticking bomb when I saw one so I'm just going to go wait in the car. Whenever you guys are done, we can get going." Hawk said, before turning to Miguel. As the two boys looked at each other, there was a newfound respect and appreciation for Miguel in Hawk's eyes, which is why Hawk didn't get into a yelling match with him about not coming back like he knew Sam was about. He merely embraced his friends, the two doing their traditional fistbump before Hawk pulled him into a hug. "Thank you. So much. You saved my life." Hawk murmured into Miguel's ear. Miguel shook his head.

"Nah, don't thank me, man. It shouldn't have happened in the first place. I'm sorry I dragged you into this shit."

"My decision to come here. Not yours. But it was you who saved my life just now. I owe you, man. I owe you."

The two embraced once more before Hawk got into his car and shut the car door, giving Sam and Miguel the privacy to have their conversation. Almost as soon as he was out of earshot, Sam spun around and faced Miguel, her gorgeous eyes still in disbelief as she stared at him in shock.

"What do you… what do you mean you're not coming back?!" Sam exclaimed. Miguel shrugged.

"I don't know. I'm just not done here, you know? I still have some unfinished business with this place. With my dad."

"Miguel! Come on! You can't be serious! You want to stay here?!"

Miguel nodded.

"Well… yeah. I mean probably not forever. I'll most likely be back by the time school restarts in September."

"3 months from now?!" Sam shouted, her heart beginning to pound faster and faster. She was having trouble breathing, her body struggling to keep up with her mind. She could not believe the words coming out of her boyfriend's lips. So many hours, days she had spent unable to drag her mind away from the excruciating worry. Pacing around her room, lying buried in blankets, staying up long nights watching netflix shows all to try to lessen some of the anxiety she was feeling. And now she was being told it was all going to start again?! And for three whole months! Three months with the person she loved most being in the hands of someone who could kill him at any moment! She didn't think she'd be able to last that long.

"Look, Sam, I know this isn't ideal, but…"

"Really, you mean girlfriends don't wish for their boyfriends at the hands of a psycho?!" Sam snapped, sarcastically, her panic taking over her voice. Miguel shook his head.

"Sam, trust me, it's really not as bad as it sounds when it comes to my safety. I know how to get around this city and besides… even if I do come into scrapes, my dad's been teaching me how to fight so I'll be safe."

"So the maniac is teaching you his ways? Greeaaaat, that's really reassuring." Sam commented. "Look, Miguel, we came all this way for you and…"

"Um… if I'm remembering correctly, I never asked you to come here with me?" Miguel interrupted. Sam shook her head furiously.

"No, but of course we were going to come after we heard who you were going to see! How could you even want to meet your dad! The man's a degenerate! A lowlife!"

"Don't talk about my dad like that." Miguel growled quietly, in a more aggressive tone. Sam looked at him, taken aback by his sudden switch from apologetic to angry.

"Excuse me?" She stammered.

"Look, Sam, I didn't ask for you guys to come! Not you, not Hawk, not Johnny! I don't need nor want the search party! I'm 5 months away from turning 18 and becoming a legal adult! Even if tomorrow, my dad turns on me, I can handle myself!"

"Fine, but at least let me stay here with you then?" Sam asked, hopefully.

"Yeah, no, that's not gonna happen." Miguel scoffed.

"See! You yourself know that this place is unsafe! If you don't want me being here, why can you get to stay here?!" Sam pointed out. Miguel glared at her, annoyed.

"Come on, Sam. You know full well things for me here are very different than they are for you. You've been here what? 30 minutes, and some assholes have already tried to rape you! You don't belong here, Sam. I know that, and I think you know that too. There aren't any other gorgeous, white teenage girls in Juarez and you know why? Because they taken by assholes like the ones we met tonight, and are raped and killed, sometimes not even in that order! I can't… I won't let that happen to you too!"

Miguel calmed down slightly as he once again met eyes with Sam and saw the sheer devastation in her eyes.

"Look, I know that I'm asking a lot. And I'm really really sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for any pain this might be causing you. But please, please just go home, Sam. Go back to normal life. And when I get back eventually, we can pick up where we left off. Is that okay?"

The couple stared at each other for a long while, locking eyes and staring deep within the soul of the other. For people who knew each other as well as Sam and Miguel did, they both felt a lack of connection with each other that they couldn't solve. Sam could tell that Miguel was not going to budge and was 100% going to be staying here no matter what she said. He just couldn't possibly understand how much this whole deal was scarring her. As someone with the mental health disorders she had, though she could be very prickly on the outside, when someone managed to break through into her heart like Miguel had, he wasn't just important to her, but he was the most important part of her life and it wasn't even close. He had seen her at her very lowest and he hadn't shied away or turned on his heel and run, and she hadn't done the same for him. They had been through hell together, which is why this was killing her. Miguel couldn't understand how much he meant to her, but likewise, Sam couldn't understand how much this trip meant to him. She eventually looked him right in his chocolate eyes and she shook her head.

"No. No it's not okay. I'm sorry."

"What? What do you mean it's not okay?" Miguel asked. "Sam, I don't know what to say. I'm staying here either way. And there's nothing you can say or do that's going to change that."

Sam nodded.

"I know. But I'm also going to tell you that if you don't come home with Juarez, our relationship is over…"

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Miguel's jaw dropped as he felt those words hammer deep in his chest, rattling against his beating heart. He had to stare at Sam in a disbelief for a few moments to see if she was kidding, but she wasn't smiling so he realised she was actually being serious.

"W-w-what?" Miguel stammered. "You… you want to break up?"

Sam shook her head and she took Miguel's trembling hands in her own.

"No, no I don't want to break up, Miguel. I didn't realise I could care about a person so much until I met you. You know, this past year, despite all of the karate drama, was one of the best of my life and a large part of that was you. Our relationship. During our relationship were some of the happiest times of my life. You were the only person patient enough to stick around even when I was at my weakest after the school fight with Tory. You made me smile again after the whole thing, and I'll never be able to tell you how grateful I am to you for that."

"Yeah, so why do we need to break up?!" Miguel exclaimed. While Sam's voice had dropped to dead calm, he was starting to panic now.

"But… that comes at a cost." Sam continued. "Miguel, you have no idea what it's like to sit at home, knowing that the person you care about most in the whole world could die at any moment. You're in a pit of snakes, Miguel, and it's just a matter of time before you get bitten. And I don't think I'm going to be able to have the strength to say goodbye to what's left of you when that happens. Look, I really wish it didn't have to be this way, but I honestly just… I don't think I can handle all of the worry, all of that stress anymore. I'm really sorry."

Miguel's mind spun as he heard this. Emotions cascaded through his mind like a tsunami waves, throwing a cacophony of different feelings at him in a matter of a few seconds. He felt devastated. Shocked. Confused. Angry. Upset. Defeated. All of these feelings rushed through him, making his heart feel like it was being ragdolled around his chest. Eventually, Miguel calmed himself enough to respond.

"You know, I thought that if anyone in the world understood why I'm here in Mexico right now, it would be you. You know me better than anyone, and you know how tough it was for me to grow up without a dad. But no. You don't get it. And I don't even blame you, Sam. I mean, how could you get it? You grew up with literally one of the world's top 5 dads ever. A man who was always right there behind you, ready to catch you if I ever fell. I never had that. Nobody was truly always there to catch me and so if I fell, I'd end up landing on my head. And Johnny was great, don't get me wrong. He did so much for me. But there's still something missing, and that's by nature of the fact that he's not my dad. He's not my dad and he never will be. My dad lives here in Mexico, and I intend on building a relationship. So please tell everyone to call off the search party because I'm staying here."

Sam looked at Miguel, tears spilling over her lashes, as she nodded. She forced herself to stay calm, not truly break down yet.

"Okay. Then I guess that's it." Sam murmured. "Goodbye Miguel."

With that, Sam hurried back over to Hawk's car, collapsing into the passenger's seat and letting the tears and sobs fall, much to Hawk's concern.

"Just drive." She whispered, and that was all the license Hawk needed to pull out of his parking spot and speed away from Juarez, the teary eyes of an Ecuadorian following them until they finally reached a corner and turned out of sight…