I hope you all haven't been too anxious waiting. Here's the next chapter and Chapter 6 is coming in a few minutes. Please leave a review to let me know what you think :)
Chapter 5 - Secrets
"So what happened? I thought you where staying at the Bakery? Dont you have to work today?" My mother asks me over breakfast.
"Nothing happened mum, I just came home is that alright?" I snap back in her direction, playing with the food on my plate. I'm too sick to eat right now as the Hangover from last might has actually started to sink in. "Yes I do have work today but not until later." I dont know how I'm going to deal with work today. I'm gonna have to see Peeta and after last night thats going to be hard.
"What time?" Mum asks me.
"In 2 hours." Its currently 10am. I have been home for 5 hours now and I've cleaned my clothes, cleaned myself up and tried to perfect walking as if nothing happened but there is still a little falter in my step. I took some of the pain killers from mums cupboard but it didnt make much difference to the pain. I also quickly read through one of mums books. It says that the pain should subside in the first 24 hours which is good. I put on a long necked top to cover the marks and I plan on leaving my hair down for the next week.
"Well you better hurry up and get ready then." She says and I smile slightly trying to cover the fact that my mind is racing.
Before I know it, I'm on my way to the Bakery. I still cant stop thinking about last night and the fact that I just cheated on my first boyfriend with his brother and he doesnt even know about it. I dont ever have to tell him but I'm not that good at keeping secrets. I'm tempted to just find Masan and tell him that I'm ill so that I can go home and not have to deal with it but I cant because I could use the money and I'm going to have to deal with it eventually. And besides I start school again in a couple of days so after that I wont be able to work as much.
"Katniss?" I hear and look up to find myself walking through the door of the Bakery. I didnt even realise that I was here. Peeta stands there looking at me with Rye behind him. Heat starts to rise up in my body when I see Peeta's face and I know I need to get out of here quickly. Oh god. I can feel the bile rising up in my throat and I sprint past them, up the stairs and straight to the bathroom throwing up everything. It burns my throat as I see the food that I had eaten just this morning.
"Hey." I hear from the door and I turn around expecting Peeta but Rye is standing there instead. Just the look on his face causes me to break down and I grab hold of him and pull him into a hug, my tears soaking his shirt. "Hey its alright, come on." He says, trying to console me but I just tighten my grip. He sits on the floor next to me and brings me onto his lap. I can hear the pain in his voice as he tries to make me feel better. Its probably hard for him to see me like this because I know for a fact that I wouldnt be able to see Rye like this especially when he is always so strong. I've always tried to be strong but sometimes you just have to let it all out.
"Sorry..." I mumble, pulling away from him slightly and kissing him. My mind is racing with thoughts of Peeta and all I can do is kiss his brother.
"Its alright. You dont have to be sorry." He says, pulling away from my lips. I feel him reach over to flush the toilet which I forgot about. "Come on lets get you home." He says to me and I start to shake my head.
"No I'm fine, let me work." I say with a slight quiver in my voice.
"Katniss you cant work like this." He doesnt let me say anything against it as he helps me up off the bathroom floor and leads me downstairs where Masan, Leaven and Peeta are standing. I focus my attention on Leaven and Masan as to not look at Peeta. I quickly glance at him though and I realise how much of a mess he looks. His eyes are black from lack of sleep or crying and his hair is all over the place.
"Are you alright?" Leaven asks me and I look back at him, nodding slightly. "Can I talk to you?" He asks and I follow him back upstairs and into Holly's room. Its empty as Holly will be downstairs somewhere. "As I said last night, You wouldnt expect me to talk to you like this but I have known you all your life and I know that you need someone to talk to right now so I'm here for you. You're not sick are you? Whats wrong?" He asks. It surprises me that he can see straight through me.
"My head is all over the place Lev and I dont know what to do." I say, letting a few tears fall as I look at him.
"Why whats wrong?" He asks again.
"Its Rye." I lie, partly. It actually is about Rye but its a lot more than that. "He just doesnt know anything. He isnt trying anymore and I'm sure that something is going on."
"Katniss I know what you mean. He was never like this before. I know him more than anyone and he has changed. And Peet agrees with me." I smile at him and nod slightly. He pulls me to him and I wrap my arms around his waist.
"Promise something?" I ask into his chest.
"Anything." He replies.
"Promise me that whatever happens, you wont hate me?" I ask and he pulls me away holding me at arms length. If Rye ever found out about me and Peeta, he would hate us both but I dont think I would be able to deal with Lev hating me too. I have to have atleast one of them that I can talk to.
"What do you mean?" He asks, confused.
"I did something. Something terrible." I say to him. "I cant tell you what it is because the person involved deserves to know first."
"Ok I promise. I could never hate you Katniss, you're like my little sister and you always have been." He says with a smile and starts leading me to the door.
"Dont let your dad send me home." I say as we walk through the door. "My mum will be asking loads of questions and If she finds out I was sick she will run about a million tests on me to find out whats wrong and I dont want her to make a fuss." He nods and we walk back downstairs.
Leaven talks to Masan about me not going home and he finally agrees but says that I cant be seen in the front of the shop lookng like this so he puts me on cleaing duty. I am to tidy up the back of the Bakery after the party last night whilst the Mellarks run the Bakery. Brooke comes over to assist me.
"Hey, how are you?" I ask her as she walks through the back door.
"I'm alright. You?" She asks in reply and I just nod. We fall into silence as we tidy up the house. She clicks on the radio and the music begins to blare out loudly. "Come one Katniss let it all go!" She shouts, dancing through the room. She grabs my hand and pulls me after her and I almost forget about everything that is going on. That is until one song comes on about cheating with someone.
He says his love for me could never die But that'd change if he ever found out about you and I Oh - but the love is cold It wouldn't hurt him if he didn't know, 'cause... When it gets too much I need to feel your touch I'm gonna run to you I'm gonna run to you Cause when the feelin's right I'm gonna run all night I'm gonna run to you He's got a heart of gold he'd never let me down But you're the one that always turns me on You keep me comin' 'round I know his love is true But it's so damn easy makin' love to you I got my mind made up I need to feel your touch I'm gonna run to you Ya - I'm gonna run to you Cause when the feelin's right I'm gonna stay all night I'm gonna run to you Ya - I'm gonna run to you Oh when the feelin's right I'm gonna run all night I'm gonna run to you
Its a very up-beat song but its enough for the questions to find their way into my head again. How am I going to tell Rye about all this? I cant keep it from him for ages. He deserves to know. If he had done something wrong then He would probably be alright after a while but he never did anything to hurt me this bad so I cant tell him lightly. Its going to cause a massive argument.
"Katniss?" Brooke asks, pulling me out of my trance. "You alright?" I nod and she shrugs before going back to cleaing. The music still blasting out from one side of the room.
"Katniss!" Someone shouts over the music and I turn around to see who it is. "Dad says could you please turn it down?" Peeta asks and I nod. He dissapears back into the kitchen and I turn the volume down on the radio.
For the rest of the day, Me and Peeta try out hardest to stay away from eachother but for some reason we keep being brought back together. for example, Masan asks me and Peeta to tidy the kitchen whilst he and Rye sort out the front of the shop and when we are all sitting on the sofa at the end of the day, Peeta walks in and the only free place is next to me. When Leaven and Brooke go back next door, Rye goes to bed and Masan goes to get Holly sorted to go back to Peeta's, where she lives now. Which means that Peeta and me are once again left alone.
When we are leaving, I stand to go and Masan suggests that Peeta get going too so that he can get Holly in bed so we end up walking out together and walking through the square together. When we get out of the square, I know that he walks through the seam to get back to the Victors Village so I just run away. I need to get away from his as fast as I can but I only get so far before my legs start to hurt. I glance back and he's standing there, staring right at me looking confused until his face softens and holds regret. I look back towards my house, igonoring the pain in my legs and I run again.
A couple days later, Me and Peeta are still really awkward around eachother but we have kind of got used to it by now. We are around eachother most of the time considering I'm doing the same kind of job as him and he is teaching me to bake. Rye does sometimes but Rye has a lot more to do than Peeta so Peeta has quite a lot of free time. He hasnt tried to talk to me about what happened, we normally just talk about the Bakery. I think that Masan has picked on something because he looks at us both funny when he sees us talking.
Today, I am starting school again and Rye promised to walk me up even though he doesnt have to go to school anymore. He finished at the end of the last games. He considers his life quite boring now, working day after day in the Bakery and not having much time to himself, thats why I'm over there nearly all the time. "Hey, how are you two?" He asks, adressing me and Prim who is walking quietly at me side as I walk up to him with my hands in my pockets. He's leaning up against the wall of the Bakery.
"I'm good what about you?" I reply to him. He pushes off the wall and takes my hand.
"Yeh. I'm good." He says to me and we set off walking towards school.
For the past couple of days, the marks arouns my chest have faded and now just look like light bruises but I still have to keep them hidden from everyone. The pain in my legs is still there but its unnoticed, as I'm fully able to walk again. I havent thrown up again since that one time and Everything seems to be kind of getting back to normal.
Its only about 10 minutes away and when we get there the school yard is half full. I remember when I used to come here just after I started dating Rye and Peeta used to come with us so that he could see everyone. He didnt have to go to school but he would still walk up with us. When I walked through the gates with Peeta on one side and Rye on the other, I would get such jealous looks but now hardly anyone looks my way except one person: Gina Stratser. Everybody knows she has always had a thing for Rye and he has never actually looked her way. I've told him about it but he doesnt believe it. Now its different though because when I notice her looking at us, Rye follows my gaze and watches her. I focus my eyes on Rye just before he winks at Gina. She smiles at him like I do. The smile you give someone that you love. I quickly look away so he thinks I didnt notice and he doesnt even mention it. Prim runs off the see Rory and Lilly and I'm left alone with Rye, feeling betrayed.
"I'll see you later Kat." He says and I turn around before he gets a chance to kiss me and I walk into the school not far behind Gina. I follow her into the dining hall and watch her walk over to her group of friends and start laughing.
"Katniss are you alright? Is something going on?" I hear from my side and I turn around to see Madge standing right next to me with Peeta's friend River. Madge and River have been dating for a couple of months now. River's only friends where Delly and Peeta so when they both no longer had to come to school, he started hanging around with me and then because I hang around with Madge, he got to know her and everything went from there.
"Yeh sorry, I just have quite a lot going on." I say in reply, still keeping my eyes fixed on Gina who is now sitting next to one of her friends, still laughing about something.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Madge asks and I think about it for a second. I can tell Madge. Everything that I have ever told her, she has kept as a secret. I cant tell her about Peeta because I cant tell anyone about that, Peeta wouldnt forgive me but Madge has had quite a few relationships so maybe she can help me with the Rye problem.
"Yeh but can we talk about it in private?" I ask, glancing at River.
"Yeh, River, I'll come and see you before lesson." Madge says and River nods, kissing her on the cheek and walking away. "Ok so whats wrong?"
I explain to her everything that I can and everything that Leaven said to me. Everything that Rye has been doing and the stuff about Gina this morning. "So what do you think I should do?" I ask her to finish off my explanation and she doesnt even think about it before answering me.
"I dont think you should do anything until you are absolutely certain that he is up to something. If it helps I will keep an eye on him for you. If anything happens, I'll come and tell you I promise." She says and I nod in thanks. "Okay well I better go and find River." She walks away from me, once again leaving me alone.
Its still really strange being at school without Peeta, Rye, Delly and Gale. I used to sit with Peeta at lunch because Gale's lunch fell at a different time than hours so it was really the only time that I actually talked to Peeta other than when we traded with the Bakery.
At 9, I walk down to my lesson. Its in the east corridor of the school which isnt hard to get to if you know where you are going. Outside my classroom is a long line of students. Each one of them are in my class. I take my place at the end of the line and wait for the teacher to show up.
"Morning class!" My Teacher says from the down the hallway just as my back hits the wall behind me.
"Morning miss!" Some of the students at the front of the line say. The ones that kiss up to her to get good grades and stuff like that. I'm definitely not one of them students.
"Now students we have a guest coming in today and I will tell you more when we get in." Miss says as she unlocks the door. We all file in and take our seats. Me in my usual seat at the back near the window. "Anyway, today we have someone coming in , you all know him very well and he will be spending the week with us as we have an art project to complete. And who nows more about art than Peeta Mellark." Oh great. I thought I would be able to get away from him at school and now he's coming here. Everyone is going to realise that something is going on when I cant talk to him properly. "Now he has agreed to do this on his own terms. We didnt ask him, he just heard that we had an art project to do and volunteered himself. I dont want any of you to give him a hard time."
"Yes Miss." Chimes out through the class again and then someone knocks on the door. I hold my breathe as Peeta walks through the door.
"Hi, sorry I'm late, I had a problem at the Bakery." Peeta says, stepping further into the room and smiling at us all. He focus' on me and nods awkwardly. I reply also with a nod and he turns back to the teacher.
"Thats quite alright Peeta." She says to him and he walks further towards the teachers desk. She tells him to sit wherever he wants whilst she introduces the project and he sits in his old seat right at the back next to where Delly used to sit. Apparently he's here to help with the art work not to teach us anything. He has also bought us a large canvas to do it on and is offering some of his paints to use. I notice that he didnt bring the paints that I bought him only the ones that he bought himself so my paints must be important to him.
By the end of the day, My hands are covered in paint and I'm really tired. Its been a pretty fun day and that hardly ever happens these days. At the beginning of the day, we spent it coming up with the idea for the project and then for the last hour of the day we started it. Me, Madge and Gina where left with the job of mixing the paints so we ended up covered in the stuff and me at first I didnt want to be near Gina after this morning but after talking to her she seems quite nice. We talk about everything and anything. She tells me that she used to be in love with Rye which I already knew. She also expresses a likeness towards me. She says that she always admired me and my strength with everything that has happened. Obviously I thanked her.
Currently we are walking down the corridor towards the doors. Madge is at my side and Gina is walking quite far ahead of me. If you ask me, I dont think she liked me much at all, I think she was just playing. I dont really like her that much anyway. Peeta and River are walking just behind us, catching up. Madge and River are leaving us at the school gates so I get to walk to work with Peeta. Maybe I can ask him why he didnt tell me that he was coming in.
"Right well we will see you tomorrow then." Madge says as we get to the school gates. They will probably be going back to Madge's house. Her father is hardly ever in and its not like the do anything anyway. Madge likes to tell me everything so I just normally know everything that ever happens in her life.
"Yeh, see you tomorrow." Peeta says and we start walking towards the Bakery. "Katniss... I need to say something to you." He says to me but I keep looking at the floor. "I just need you to know that I'm about as awkward about this whole situation as you are but we are letting it show too much. Everytime you see me, your face goes red and you look like you're about to pass out and the other day when you threw up? What was that about? Anyway, I just want to say, how about we forget the whole thing and never think about it again? Maybe we can try and lead a normal life again?" I can feel his eyes on the side of my head.
"None of this is normal Peeta!" I shout slightly. "I cheated on my boyfriend! And whats worse is that it was with his little brother! What does that make me look like? He's going to hate me Peeta! I can't just forget about it!" We are both standing there looking at eachother now.
"Okay fine, we dont need to forget about it but remember Katniss that we are best friends and I just wish that we where again. I dont want this to stand in the way of it. Please just think about it please?" He purses his lips and we set off walking towards the Bakery in silence.
He's right, we cant let this stand infront of anything, It's not like it changed anything. They only people that know about it are me and Peeta and its going to stay that way. Nothing is going to change if we dont tell anyone so if me and Peeta forgot about it then it would be gone completely and we wouldnt have to deal with it ever again. We where and still are Best Friends so maybe we can be again. I just need to learn to let go.
"We have a big haul coming in tonight, dads going to need all our help." Peeta says to me and I nod.
We make it to the Bakery just in time. Rye and Leaven show up with the trolley full of all the ingredients. Without even thinking about it, Peeta picks up 2 of the sacks of flour and walks through the back door of the Bakery. I follow him inside and open the door to the store room for him before quickly running upstairs to go to the toilet.
When I get back down, nothing has happened except the fact that Peeta has now taken off his shirt. I feel my blood start to pump faster and my heart picks up beats. My hands are sweating and I cant seem to take my eyes off Peeta. His muscles across his front, tensing and un-tensing as he moves the sacks around. His face, beads of sweat pouring down from his curly blonde hair, which he brushes out of his face as he goes to get another sack from outside.
"Peeta?" Rye asks, walking through the door, stopping Peeta in his tracks. He turns around to face Rye. "How did you get those scratches all over your back?" Oh no! I find my legs moving me down the stairs and I walk over to where Peeta stands, facing Rye. "Has the one and only Peeta Mellark finally got a girlfriend? Had a little bit of fun did we?"
"No, I-I-I erm..." Peeta struggles for words. There is no way that you can lie about scratches on your back because you cant get scratches like that any other way. Why did I have to scratch him?
"I knew it. So who is she? Do I know her?" Rye asks, now excited.
"I dont have a girlfriend, nothing happened, can we just drop it please?" Peeta asks and Rye shrugs his shoulders and throws his right arm around my shoulder.
"As long as it isnt my Katniss." He jokes but neither me or Peeta can laugh, I can see the same fear in his eyes, that I feel right now.
When Rye has finally gone to get another sack, I walk over to the kitchen counter where Peeta's shirt is and throw it to him so that he can put it on. We cant afford someone else noticing the stratches. Just like I can afford for anyone to see my love bites. Not that anyone will as long as I watch what I wear.