Notes at the bottom

"I'm sleeping more and eating again

I'm starting over like a factory town

And you always build it better the second time around"

(Aron Wright, Build it Better)

OOO

Sitting at the bow, Helenus waited for the well-known profile of Corcyra to appear at the horizon.

Odysseus was in good shape, Telemachus' son was growing to Mantes' great joy, their alliance was as strong as it could be.

"How did you meet Odysseus?" asked Molossus.

His stepson was now accompanying him on a regular basis. After all, in a few months he would ascend the throne.

"A few years ago, when he finally came back from the war" he replied.

"Why don't you ever tell me about your past?" the prince asked after a while.

"I don't see how my past is of your concern" Helenus answered tersely.

"Oh! Don't touch me! Sorry I even asked!" muttered the prince.

Their relationship had improved after that argument, a few years before. Helenus had to admit that he was quite fond of the boy, despite his impulsiveness and that polemic attitude which were so typically Achaean – and probably age-related, too.

Sometimes, it occurred to him that Molossus existed only because Hector was dead and Troy had been defeated. And nevertheless, Helenus was glad that the boy existed.

He was aware that no other father in Buthrotum would have tolerated Molossus' irreverence and his puns. But, as long as they were alone, it wasn't a problem. It was their way, and it was probably impossible to change. Not to mention that it sometimes made fun, even if Helenus would never admit it openly.

The prince was quite curious about his past, and very persistent. He tried to catch him off guard with random questions, he openly pestered him, sometimes he even tried to manipulate him saying that Helenus didn't trust him enough.

"There are many bad memories in my past, I am sorry that I am not willing to talk about them!" he replied sarcastically.

"Alright. But there cannot be only bad memories in one's past" retorted Molossus.

But of course, this wasn't just about bad memories, was it?

There were things that he just didn't want his stepson to know, because he was afraid of his reaction.

Molossus was right: it was a matter of trust, but the point wasn't that the prince was not trustworthy.

Helenus closed his eyes with a sigh.

One day, he would have to face this fear, too. The fear of taking off his mask. The fear of trusting someone else like he had trusted Aesacus. He just couldn't bring himself to do it now, the very idea of it gave him chills. Besides, he didn't want anybody on the ship to overhear that conversation.

But he had to do it, sooner or later.

Then he would do it just before Molossus' coronation, in a few months. Maybe, the relief at finally giving up the throne would compensate the uneasiness he felt at the thought of opening up.

Helenus bit his lip to keep from smiling.

He felt kind of proud of himself.

He had just decided to open up with a person he cared about, without having to be convinced. He had decided to trust his stepson and hope that he wouldn't be rejected. And not because he was upset and couldn't keep his mouth shut: no, this was a choice.

Now he began to understand what Aesacus had meant many years before: "Your shyness will never prevent you from being strong, bold, wise, or anything you want to be".

It was true.

-O-O-O

It was late into the night and Helenus' cup of wine was empty.

"And that's all" he concluded softly.

Molossus stared at him in disbelief.

"You have been talking for hours and you say that's all?"

"I hope your curiosity is satisfied" said Helenus.

"Very much so. I think I understand you much better now. You're still annoying, though" the prince answered with a smile.

"You should talk, young man!" retorted Helenus. But Molossus noticed that he was fighting not to smile.

They were both silent for a while.

"I'm not sure that I can take your place" the prince eventually admitted. Since they were being so honest, he might as well say it.

"You can" replied Helenus. "But if you really think that you cannot yet… I can keep the throne for another while".

"You hate being the king" objected Molossus, frowning.

"Yes. And I think that you have nothing to worry about. But I can keep doing it, if you want me to".

The prince considered this offer for a while, but then he shook his head.

"It's alright, I will take over. But… I will need your help".

Helenus turned and touched the prince's shoulder. It was a very unusual gesture for him, and Molossus stared at him with wide eyes.

"You will always have it, my son".

This fiction is finally over!

Many thanks to everybody who have read this (and to Ennui Enigma for the reviews)

Notes:

I am very curious about the history of the Late Bronze Age. In my story, I tried to mix the fictional elements with at least some historical accuracy. My main sorces are:

- The book "1177: the year civilization collapsed" by archaeologist Eric H. Cline. You can find his conferences on YouTube, too.

- The YouTube video "who were the Sea Peoples" on the channel "History Time" and the YouTube video "The Bronze Age Collapse" on the channel "fall of civilizations" (I actually recommend both YouTube channels if you like accurate videos about history)

However, my fiction has many poetic licenses, including the "bronze crisis" and the fact that people living in the Troy area would worship deities like Artemis and Hermes.

The fictional sources are the Iliad, the Odyssey and the Aeneid. Helenus was scarcely mentioned and not characterized in these works, while Aesacus is my own invention. Eudorus was mentioned as one of Achilles' generals in the Iliad.

Helenus' personality has not been inspired by anybody in particular. His history, however, is inspired by the historical figure of king Aldfrith of Northumbria. Aldfrith was a scholar, destined to a life in the church, but he succeeded to his brother after his death in battle. His reign was not characterized by a territorial expansion but marked the beginning of the Northumbrian Golden Age, a time of great artistic development.

In my mind, Helenus looks a little bit like Egon Spengler from the 1984 Ghostbusters movie, with the same serious attitude (of course, without the glasses and the pompadour haircut). As for Aesacus, old Aesacus looks something like Clint Eastwood in my mind (just the face, not the attitude: if Helenus had yelled at Clint Eastwood, my fic would have been shorter for sure).

Thank you again to everyone who read this. If you are interested, I am writing two other fictions revolving around the same characters.

I'm looking forward to hearing any thoughts.

Medical warning: I have tried to portray Helenus' anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder in an accurate way.

Being in the Late Bronze Age, his therapeutic options are limited: lifestyle modifications, physical exercise and talking to a kind and understanding person. These things are all helpful when dealing with anxiety and depression, but I am in no way suggesting that every disorder of this kind can be handled with just that, without the help of a trained mental health professional.

One could wonder whether Helenus has avoidant personality disorder. I personally think that he does not meet the criteria for personality disorders: for some years, his symptoms severely impair his functioning, but this changes later in life, so I don't really see an enduring pattern here.