MasterFranny: I know there were only Bryan and Tala interacting with Kai, so soon enough Rei will have his own chance as well.

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Rating: PG-13 may get higher…

Warnings: Contains Yaoi, which is male x male relationship. Don't like, don't read, don't flame. Got it?

Disclaimer: if I owned BeyBlade, Kai would be making out with all the other males… but you don't see that in the episodes so no, I don't own.

"Talking"

'Thinking'

"(Talking into other languages)"

–Dreams sequences, flashbacks, memories–

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The Way You Feel

Chapter 05 When friends can't remember you

Kai looked rather amused as he eyed the 'thing' that was now in front of him on a plate, a slight grin –or better said, a smirk– clear on his lips, before he glanced up, meeting the expectant faces of the teens that called themselves his friends.

They clearly looked proud of their cooking results… on the other side, he wasn't really convinced, despite the amusement.

Crimson eyes danced back and forth from them to 'it', knowing just how hard the teens had worked to prepare it, even though, Kai did not know what 'it' was in the first place. To him, the four teens looked so expectant he couldn't find the strength in him to refuse to taste what they cooked.

They did that for him and him alone.

He felt rather warm inside, because they'd taken time to do something they had never done before, and all for him. How could he deny them at least a mouthful?

Not that he was glad they blown up the kitchen, not at all, but all the care they put into cooking, just for him… that was almost touching. Some part of him wondered, if they had always been this nice even before –before he lost his memory.

Some part of him was telling him that no, this was a side no one knew existed –and he felt proud to be the one seeing this, but also sad because… it meant they were underestimated. He could not understand his feelings completely, so he put them aside for later on.

Carefully slicing a spoonful of the 'thing', which happened to be almost all black on the outside, and rather raw–looking on the inside, Kai swallowed and forced himself to ignore the details and the horrible appearance. As long as his… friends cared, it would not go wasted.

Lilac, azure, reddish and pale eyes all stared at him, almost leaning forwards, as Kai placed the spoon in his mouth, bracing himself for the worst.

…

And it was.

It damn was.

The taste was… horrible. It stung his tongue worse than a burnt, filling his mouth with a bitter and disgusting taste.

It looked like a piece of burnt salt with raw fish and it was hard to chew as well, though on the inside it was falling into tiny crumbles.

So, as he forced himself not to pass out on the spot, he quickly grabbed a napkin and spit the 'thing' from hell into it, falling in a coughing fit that caused tears in his eyes as well. His mouth and his insides were burning and he felt like he was choking, damn it!

"(W… water… please…)" he rasped out, his pale complexion turning a sickening shade of green. Had he ever tasted something this awful? Gods, he hoped not.

All the four teens stared at his reaction as their expectant looks turned to shocked and baffled ones, all rather surprised that their experiment didn't turn successful –though, how could they have been oblivious to their failed attempt, being the thing of a charcoal black on the outside, that no one knew.

Bryan was the first to react as he reached out for a glass of water and swiftly handed it at the slate haired teen, who gulped it down like there was no tomorrow and asked for more with a desperate wave of his hand, so Bryan simply handed him the bottle, and Kai drank it down whole without even stopping to breath.

"(So… it was bad, wasn't it?)" Ian asked miserably. If he'd been able to pout, he would have, but he couldn't, and in his trying he resembled more a scary ogre–like sulking guy than a normal, pouting teen.

Kai panicked. He didn't want them to feel bad about this…

Forcing his coughs to subside, he managed to form a shaky grin as his face scrunched up, "(No, it… it wasn't…)" he coughed more, bravely fighting back the urge to throw up. "(It was just… well…)" he couldn't find a word to explain the horrible, awful, hellish taste of the 'thing' that would not be offensive and he started to fidget uncomfortably.

Spencer warily picked a small, almost invisible bite from the 'thing' and spit it in another napkin the moment his tongue brushed against it, starting to grimace from what he had thought was a good, sweet bun and that ended up being one of the possible ways to torture someone into spilling their innermost secrets.

"(Horrible, absolutely disgusting,)" he managed to stutter, effectively restraining himself from voicing out the more colourful words his mind came up to describe the 'thing', shuddering.

He wasn't the one known for such language…that was Bryan, who proved himself worthy of the nickname he had –"Swearing Master"– by nudging at the 'thing', taking it in his mouth, spitting it on the floor without much compliments, and starting to curse and swear in a way that would have caused any low–life criminal to blush in shame.

"(Ian!)" Bryan towered menacingly on the Snake, "(You put salt instead of sugar!)"

"(But they looked the same to me!)" Ian whined, knowing that somehow, this was his entire fault, but he wasn't going to admit that.

Through this chaos, between Ian's vain attempts to escape Bryan's wrath, Spencer sulking about the bad taste, Tala pissed off with white streaks on his cheeks –the doom of the flour was still upon them… ha!- Kai started to laugh.

Not a maniacal laugh, not a childish laugh or a silly one. No, the laughter that made one cringe from stomach ache after a while.

It was just too funny.

He couldn't stop himself, but the best thing was, his laughter wasn't the only one. It was soon followed by a fit of snickers coming from Bryan and Spencer, giggles from Ian, and bark laughter –pretty much scary that's it– from the red head.

Kai stopped laughing to glance at them, curiously, knowing what he was witnessing was not by any mean normal, and felt something warm fill up his heart. Those people, those so called 'friends', whom he'd looked first since waking up with a clouded mind, at first had looked rather stoic and maybe even emotionless, except some flicker in their eyes, but now… they were open.

Not as open as the three men that came earlier, that scared the wits out of Kai with their words –insert a mental shudder on Kai's part here– but, more on a contented, only–to–be–witnessed–by–occasionally–few–people kind of open.

He almost felt special by looking at this.

When the four noticed Kai was not laughing anymore, but instead he was merely glancing at them, the laughter, barks, or snickers whatsoever stopped abruptly and silence followed.

Realizing it was his fault the laughter had stopped, and feeling quite embarrassed since they were now staring at him in confusion, Kai decided he should explain himself to them.

"(It feels…)" he tried, looking at them, "(like a…)" he stopped. He knew the word. It felt fitting but somehow, it was hard to say out aloud. "(Family…)"

On that matter, where was his family?

Did he have a family to start with?

Or were… were those teens his family? Could that be the reason why he felt this good with them?

"(Sort of,)" Tala replied softly, almost un–Tala like, before a wolfish smirk appeared on his face as he threw away in the trash the rest of the 'thing' with no second thought. "(We once used to live together… and we wanted you to come with us again now, before you had this… problem)".

Kai nodded, knowing deep down that this was not the time to ask for his family. Something was amiss, but he was willingly to wait.

"(I am going out to buy something at the café down the street… I bet you are all hungry like me now, right?)" Spencer stood up and waving lightly his hand he left, his mood increasing considerably at the thought of real good food.

"(Hey, wait for me!)" Ian was on his heels the moment he finished speaking and they could hear his pleading for Spencer to buy him candies.

To which they could hear him reply, "(It'll be my pleasure to trade you with candies, Ian)".

"(I think I am going to try and clean the mess,)" Bryan sighed. "(We will need to call someone to repair the oven… you know Kai, it was you who bought it for us,)" the Falcon looked fondly at the Phoenix, and Kai blinked.

"(Me? How?)"

"(You have… a lot of money,)" Tala was not at ease speaking about Kai's wealth, not if the one owning it couldn't remember why he was owning it or who gave it to him, but he figured it would be better to laugh it off like he usually did. "(You are a rich spoiled brat! You decided we couldn't live just by delivered food and you bought us the oven to force us to learn how to cook)".

"(Really?)" Kai frowned.

There was something more with Tala, when they were alone –when they were really alone. Tala warmed up more. More than he actually did with the other teens around… at least, from what Kai could see in these few moments.

His eye sparkled with something… warmth, but not only this.

Kai wondered if Tala had been like this before… before he lost his memory. And he wondered, if he too was used to conceal his emotions to others.

He found it hard to do. He felt… free, by showing what he felt. But there was that nudge, in the back of his head, that was trying to force him not to appear this open. As if it was somehow wrong.

Most of all, he liked to smile.

So, with no good reason, he let a grin trace his lips. Just a second, then it faded again, but the sparkle of happiness remained in his eyes and Tala raised one eyebrow, "(You can smile all you want,)" he stated with content.

The red head was happy, because Kai looked… relaxed.

Crimson eyes noticed something that was scattered on the floor, and slowly Kai picked it up, frowning –it was Tala's white coat, stained with blood, now dried and darkened.

"(What's this?)"

"(It's… a gift…)" Tala looked at it sadly. "(I was keeping it like a treasure)".

Kai paled.

"(That's my blood!)" He stared guiltily at it, his finger tracing slowly the red patters on the white cloth. "(I ruined it…)"

"(It's not your fault! It happened, it's not that important!)" Tala tried to make him feel better; he knew he shouldn't have said it. "(Really, Kai…)"

"(Who… who gave it to you?)" Kai said, depressed. "(It must have been someone important)".

"(It was you, Kai,)" the red head replied nonchalantly.

Kai stared at the coat and once again run his fingers on the smooth cloth, but suddenly, without warning…

–Start Memory–

"(Tala, wait!)"

The red haired blader turned around as Kai approached him with a big lump in his arms, and waited for him; two days had already passed since Biovolt's defeat, and Tala and the rest of the Demolition–Boys were still homeless, even though Kai had convinced the BBA's president to give them a second chance by renting them a house in Moscow.

Unfortunately, the house would be accessible to them only in a few days, so until then the four teens would stay in the Abbey. At least Boris and the guards were already gone.

The four would be there, completely alone.

"(Kai,)" Tala's eyes softened down a bit as he observed the other teen run up to him; he was still a bit angry at him, even though he would never be able to stay angered at Kai for too long.

But still, there were things they still had to talk about, and Tala didn't feel like forgiving him so easily, no matter if his heart ached when he saw Kai… no matter if his crimson orbs were showing a bit of care for him.

Maybe they would be able to be friends again…

"(Mr. Dickinson said the house will be ready for Saturday,)" Kai's voice was cold, but his tone was not, and his eyes were filled with something that warmed Tala up. "(I though that… well, the Abbey must be really cold, now that the heating is not up, so… I…)" he fidgeted with the lump in his arms, and Tala stood questioningly looking at him. Kai never ever fidgeted. "(Here,)" he finally said, handing the lump to Tala, not too gently.

Tala stood still, holding the envelope, not quite understanding what was happening, "(what's this?)"

"(It's a damn coat to keep you warm)" Kai looked away, unease at showing emotions. "(Consider it a present… from a friend,)" he added, in a hope–filled voice. He wasn't used to such acting and it came out quite clumsily.

Tala was speechless as he opened the envelope, azure eyes staring amazedly at the snow white coat in his hands. It was beautiful as well as smooth, and under his always cold fingers it felt warm. He admired the fur covering it almost entirely and glanced at Kai, who then hurried, "(it's not real fur, obviously, but it can warm you more than real fur, and it's… well, it looks good)".

Tala could only stare in awe at the beautiful coat.

"(You…don't like it?)" Kai felt a stab of disappointment but suppressed the feeling. It was clear Tala didn't want to be his friend again, but it was expected, after all Kai did, all the hurt he caused…

"(No!)" Tala hurriedly replied. He felt pretty stupid. But, he was so happy… Kai bought him a present, just for him, "(of course not. I mean! Yes! I love it,)" to prove his words he pulled it up, surprised at the amount of warmth it provided to his usually cold body. He snuggled into it almost unconsciously, pretty out of character, but he was too happy to care. "(See? It fits me… thanks, Kai)".

Kai's eyes smiled at him, warmly, though his face did not give away anything.

"(Wouldn't want you to get a cold, anyway… Wolfie,)" the Phoenix dared to add. "(Or you'll start acting pushy)".

Tala smirked, showing his fangs. He couldn't believe what he was witnessing, Kai was joking… with him. Like when they were both younger.

Maybe there was a concrete possibility of restoring their friendship, after all.

"(Don't you want to see that,)" he replied.

–End Memory–

Kai grabbed his head with one hand and with the other he swiftly grabbed the couch to prevent himself from collapsing, shaking his head weakly; the memory… if it was a memory… left him drained out of strength.

He let out a strangled and pained breath as Tala's arms circled his body, helping him down on the couch.

"(Kai! What happened?)"

"(I… I think I had… a flash of a memory…)" Kai stuttered. "(It was you and me… when I gave you the coat…)"

He couldn't see the happiness shining in the azure fiery orbs because he was keeping his own close, but he could detect it in Tala's voice as the Wolf answered, "(You will have all your memories back, Kai, I am sure of this)".

Kai looked up fiercely at him, his face showing determination. He knew deep down he was not weak and he wanted to find his memories back, the memories of those teens who were acting like a family to him. He was determined to show he could do this on his own, because he wanted to thank all of them for the support they gave him.

He felt like he owed it to them, they had been nice, they cared.

"(By the way… what did you mean by, team?)" He asked, looking at the icy eyed blader near him. The pain was dulled again, only that question lingered. "(Team?)"

"(As in, a BeyBlade team,)" Tala sighed. He knew the question would pop up eventually, so he'd prepared himself for it. "(You are part of)".

Kai's eyes filled with confusion, "(What's… BeyBlade?)" Then he looked worried, "(is it something I need to know? Is it something important?)"

Tala smiled –or at least, his eyes smiled. "(It's just…)" he stopped. How could he explain now? How could he tell Kai about the pain, the torments, and the hurt that beyblade brought upon them all? How could he put Kai under this kind of pain again? Now, that he knew nothing of it anymore?

But at the same time, how could he explain to Kai the exhilarating feeling of launching their beys together in the field, cheering them to the victory? How could he explain to Kai what BeyBlade meant for both of them?

Because even if it hurt them in ways no one would ever understand, Tala knew that they all loved the sport. It had been the only light in their darkness. How could he explain all of this to Kai?

"(Something we once thought was important)" he finished. He could not tell him, not now. This was something he was not ready to say.

Then something occurred to him. Something he hadn't thought about before. He rushed away, leaving a stupefied Kai behind, "(hey!)" Kai called out.

Tala did not turn as he went through Kai's old clothes, still bloody and scattered on the floor. "(Dranzer!)" He yelled. "(She's not there! She's not– wait, there's Black Dranzer…)" he pulled out the bit from the pocket of the dirty pants and shoved it to Kai whilst he continued searching.

Kai looked at him in confusion, not knowing what he was speaking about, and looked down at the thing he now held in his hand.

It was a small plastic chip, with a strange drawing on the middle, a weird looking bird that resembled a lot a phoenix, but was completely black. Kai blinked as he felt something invisible press against his chest, vanishing a moment later.

He could not understand the feeling, but looking down at the bit–chip he'd felt a thin wave of pain rattle his body. Why was that? There was nothing wrong with this plastic thingy, so why…

Tala raised his eyes from the clothes, despair clear on his pale face, and groaned, making Kai look up at him.

"(Dranzer's gone)" he said, shaking his head. "She's gone…"

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The first to actually arrive at the Demolition Boys' house was, of course, Tyson.

Strange, considering that he didn't even know where it was in the first place, since he never even dreamed about going to visit them –but still.

He had asked around to every single person he could find. So he arrived first and without even stopping to regain back his breath he hopped up the stairs with astonishing vitality –that would have made Kai proud if he could remember who Tyson was, and could see him now– and rang the bell.

The only thing that mattered now was speak to Kai, to see with his own eyes if he really couldn't remember them. No matter if Tala tried to stop him. No matter if Kai really couldn't remember. He was not safe with them.

In the end Rei, Max and Kenny finally arrived, panting heavily, and stared breathlessly as the door opened, revealing the cold and emotionless face of the Russian Team captain; Tala glared hastily at them all and did not make a move to invite them in.

He knew why they were here; he didn't want them to anyway. Kai needed some time to relax with them before seeing more people who declared to know him, and certainly the BladeBreakers would only cause more chaos.

"We're here to see Kai," Rei hissed. "You will let us in… or…"

The atmosphere was tense, and Max cringed helplessly; things were only worsening up and he didn't like it, not at all. They were not there to cause problems, but he could see they were only doing this.

Kenny hid behind his back, thinking the same.

A voice could be heard from behind the Wolf's back and even if it spoke in Russian the BladeBreakers knew it was Kai. Tala looked inside, speaking back with a voice that sounded not as cold as they assumed it would, then he turned hastily at them again and huffing he stepped aside, letting them in, not without a loud growl of disapproval in their general direction.

The BladeBreakers entered the apartment, looking around trying to locate their friend.

Tyson saw Kai and froze; for a moment he simply stood there gaping at him, with wide eyes –he resembled a fish– too shocked to speak. Kai looked so young and out of place now, he realized, with no marks on his face, his scarf gone, and clothes too big for him.

He didn't look scary at all either, and this alone stunned Tyson more than anything else.

There was a bandage on Kai's head, his pale skin contrasting with his crimson eyes, that were looking unfriendly at them, but curiously all the same.

There was no icy coldness in his posture at all.

This wasn't the Kai he used to know.

Max and Kenny saw Kai and gaped, astonished he could look so differentwithout marks. Kenny couldn't but feel bad thinking that maybe -just maybe- Vassilj was completely right. Kai looked too young, too innocent.

Maybe he was suffering for amnesia, but that could have been Kai without the Abbey.

Maybe the Demolition Boys really were just unfortunate, and not evil at all… maybe Tyson and the others were simply wrong…

Max stared, almost worried. Even though he knew he could easily create a bond with this new Kai, he had the distinct feeling he would not like him… it would not feel the same. Kai was Kai, and this one was not the Kai he knew.

Rei saw Kai, and his brain process stopped dead. 'Shit, how can he look even more hot like this?' amber eyes trailing down his crush's frame, from his mark–less cheeks to everything else, taking in Tala's clothes (they were too big for him, but he looked positively great anyway, so Rei was not going to complain).

Rei had to fight the urge to jump on Kai to ravish him, but he promised himself he would soon make Kai fall for him.

"Kai!" Tyson was about to launch himself on Kai, but found his way blocked by Tala's furious glare as the Wolf stepped between the BladeBreakers and Kai.

"Who are you?" Kai glanced from Tyson to Rei to Max to Kenny and then back to Tala, waiting for one of them to explain. Then, as an afterthought, "you're the ones Mr. Dickinson told me about? Uhm… Max, and the others?"

Max's eyes brighten up at the mention of his name and jumped forwards, but Kai stepped back, mildly afraid, and warily positioned himself behind the Russian.

From his position behind Tala's back, secure from the new people, the slate haired teen could have a better look at the four standing there as if owning the entire house –which really was impolite from them.

The first was a bluenette, who looked like he could do with some athletic training –he looked so fat– and was at the moment yelling against Tala, who was effectively ignoring him and was having a glare contest with the one dressed in white.

That one was obviously Chinese, golden catlike eyes, black long hair, wearing Chinese outfit, and he looked pretty scary, but to Kai he also looked kind of cute, as in a feminine way. He mildly wondered if he could purr, scolding himself for his stupid and random thoughts.

Then there were two others, the one who jumped at the name 'Max', who was blonde and had a childlike face, with baby blue eyes, and a little one –almost as tall as Ian– whose eyes couldn't be seen anywhere; He had brown hair, a laptop under his arm and a huge pair of glasses on his forehead.

Kai could not place names near their faces, as supposed, and he couldn't feel anything coming from them (no sensations of friendship, nothing), but at the same time, they didn't look exactly foreign to him.

He knew he had known them before, but he could not remember.

As his head started to hurt he stopped his thoughts and blinked.

"I can't remember you," he stated simply wishing they would go away, too many visits were making him confused and slightly pissed off. "Why are you here?"

It was a shock for the four Japanese bladers, even if Mr. Dickinson had warned them, but they shook it off easily and determined expressions appeared on their faces instead –Kai needed to remember who they were.

It was the Dragon who spoke first, "I'm Tyson, they're Rei, Max and Kenny aka Chief," he pointed to the others. "We're part of the same team Kai! You're not with them!"

Kai narrowed his eyes but did not answer: here it was again, the 'team' thing. But what team!

"I think…" Tala stopped; this was a hard thing to do for him since he hated the BladeBreakers, but he knew how Kai felt towards them, and he loved Kai. "You can sit down so we can… talk".

He felt like he'd swallowed dust, but Kai needed to know about the Japanese team… curse Spencer and Mr. Dickinson and all of them…

Kenny stared at him in shock, feeling more and more guilty, Max smiled happily –he really wanted to become friends with them, they couldn't be that bad after all– Rei growled but sniffed and Tyson glared with superiority at Tala, as if he'd won some kind of contest.

Tala sighed internally and pointed roughly at the seats. This was going to be harder than he first thought, and he would have to brace himself… just for Kai. He was doing this for Kai.

"There," he huffed.

Kai glanced at him then at the others, sitting down; all he wanted was to go to sleep again, this was starting to be really annoying…

……………………………………………

Mr. Dickinson felt positively angered now, and this was not something usual speaking about him; he was not an impulsive person and he never got angry, not even against people he had some grudge against, so the need to break something was foreign to him.

And still, here he was, mumbling under his breath in order to calm down, effectively pissed off.

He'd been going back and forth from the Demolition Boys' house for too many times already, and he was annoyed. A lot.

He said to Tala that he would have been back in the evening, but now things required his presence, since the BladeBreakers were going to see Kai, and he had to be there; also, he had to call the doctor and ask him for more information, since he was Kai's legal tutor now that Voltaire was in jail.

He only wanted Kai's welfare, after all.

Still, he wasn't completely ok with the doctor's disposition. Kai needed calm, he couldn't stay with a bunch of teens that needed themselves some social rehabilitation, not with a bad amnesia at least. He wanted to speak to the doctor and…

"Stanley, we're here," Bruce sighed again, he was going through same trail of thoughts and was tired of it. He trusted the Demolition Boys, but Kai needed professional help.

Mr. Dickinson left the car with Bruce and Grandpa G on his wheels and as he walked up to the door he dialled the number Tala gave him, paying attention to dial it right.

After three seconds he felt someone lift the line at the other hand, and unconsciously straightened up.

"(Hello,)" he stated clearly in Russian, knocking on the closed door at the same time. "(I was searching for…)" he frowned. Tala hadn't said the name of the doctor, so he really didn't know who to ask for.

"(Hello!)" answered a cheery voice on the other end, not even waiting for him to finish the phrase. "(Here's Pronto Pizza! What would you like to order?)"

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MasterFranny: oooh, what's happening? You really want to know? Then drop me a review. I really love them and they make me write faster!