The three detectives walked into the morgue, and found a pensive looking Melinda practically glaring at the file in her hands. She looked so deep in thought that she didn't even look up when the three came to a stop in front of her.
"Dr. Warner?" Carisi called questioningly, but received no response.
"Melinda?" Fin called a bit louder…..still nothing.
Amanda, never being the patient one, put her fingers in her mouth and blew out, releasing a loud whistle, making even both men jump in surprise. Carisi glared at her, while Fin shook his head in amusement at the always impatient blonde, but both bit their tongues when Melinda finally looked up at them.
"You wanted to see us?" Amanda said sweetly, batting her eyelashes at the older woman, who at the moment seemed like someone just killed her cat.
"Before I hand you this file. Yes, I double checked. I ran the DNA almost a dozen times before I called you. NO, there was no cross contamination. Yes, I'm sure of the findings. And no, I have no idea how it can happen," she counted off hastily, her voice not only firm, and leaving no room for arguments, but audibly shaken.
"Melinda, why don't you just cut to the chase?" Fin suggested, and she handed them the file.
"When your vic's DNA went through the system, there was a familial match," she explained, as Amanda took the file from her and popped it open. All three immediately gaped at the printed paper, before Carisi finally raised his eyes to meet the equally baffled ones of Melinda Warner. "That can't be!" he breathed in shock.
Melinda opened her mouth to agree with him, when her eyes snapped to Fin when the last three words she expected left his mouth. "Yes, it can."
Once Melinda looked closely, she noted that the only one who seemed completely shocked by the news was Carisi. Fin and Amanda, despite being initially shocked, were now more concerned.
"This complicates everything!" Amanda pointed out, dropping the hand that's holding the file to her side, and running the other through her hair.
"You two knew about this?" Melinda demanded, almost angrily, though her drop dead look was directed at Fin.
"Not this," Fin defended, his hand pointing to the file still in Amanda's hand. "She told me a couple of years ago, after Elliot left. We were out in a bar, and apparently it was her birthday."
"Can someone please explain to me what the hell is going on?" a frustrated Carisi almost growled.
"I think that's a story you both should hear from her," Amanda answered softly.
"Does Barba know?" Melinda wondered, and the only two detectives who seemed to know what was going on, shrugged. "She told me after Nick left, and we haven't mentioned it since. But they were close before they started dating, so he may have an idea," she replied, the last sentence seemed to be more wishful thinking than anything. It was going to be hard enough telling Olivia about this, and adding Barba's name to the list was not something she wanted to do.
"How do you wanna handle this?" Carisi pipped up.
"I don't know," Amanda breathed in frustration, before she turned around and made her way to the elevator. Fin motioned with his head to Melinda to follow them, before he joined Carisi and trailed behind a now too-pissed-off-to-reason-with Amanda. It wasn't lost on Fin how close the blonde had gotten to Olivia, and how they both seemed to have a lot in common. So it was only rational for Amanda to be taking this personally. It's not like it wasn't personal for him too. Hell! It just became personal for the entire department. But he had been doing this longer than Amanda had, and he knew that someone had to be the level headed one, and it sure as hell wasn't going to be Olivia. Come hell or high waters, the bitch who did this was going to be caught, and he knew Barba would fry her. This was personal for him too. But if they all let their feelings get to them, they may slip, and the defense can use it to claim vendetta.
Once they were inside the elevator, Amanda seemed to have finally regained her bearings. He saw sanity slowly creeping back into her eyes, as the gears in her head turned desperately in an effort to process the information, and try to come up with a solution. He thought it was a good time to lay down his plan.
"Amanda, how about we talk to Barba first? See where he stands with this, I don't think Liv's been dating him for nearly eight months and never mentioned this, so he might be able to help us break the news to her," he suggested, and when she offered no objections, he continued. "If Dodds is still there, we'll pull him out of the office, and talk to him in the crib, then we can all figure out a way to tell her."
All three nodded, just as the elevator's doors slid open at their floor. "Fin, why don't you pull him out? And Carisi, I want you to actually step in and tell them both what the jurors told Fin and I, as well as the description Eddie gave us. This should keep the conversation between them going long enough for us to talk to Barba," Amanda told him, and the younger detective merely nodded.
But as it turned out, they didn't have to worry about the first part of their plan. For as soon as they entered the squad room, they found none other than Barba leaning against Fin's desk, with his phone pressed to his ear. His eyes narrowed slightly at the four of them, one eyebrow quirking up when he saw Melinda with them, bearing the same face the other three had.
The Spanish words he was saying into the phone suddenly gained speed, and by the time they came to a stop in front of him, he had already hung up.
"Is everything alright?" he cut to the chase, his eyes suspiciously studying all of their faces, and warily looking at Melinda. It was never good news when the ME decided to make the trip to the squad room herself.
Carisi took that as his cue to head for Olivia's office. "We need to talk to you," Amanda said instead, gesturing with her hand towards the crib. This somehow made the knot in his stomach twist tighter.
When Olivia's eyes cut to the interaction going in the bullpen, it didn't go unnoticed by Dodds, but he had assumed that the detectives would come inside anyway, to give him any updates. He was surprised when the only one who came into the office, was Carisi. The confused look on Olivia's face as she watched Fin and Amanda lead Melinda and Barba towards the crib, had him turning around in time to see a very confused Barba following the other three. He sidestepped Carisi, and yanked the door open.
"Detective Tutuola, a word!" He demanded, before stepping back into the office, without waiting for Fin to reply.
Fin glanced over at Amanda, and she nodded reassuringly at him. "I've got this Fin," she assured him.
Fin walked back towards Olivia's office, as the other three continued to the crib.
Once he was inside, and before he even got a chance to close the door behind him, Dodds immediately turned towards him. Not even giving Olivia a chance to ask any of the thousand questions on her mind. It was quite obvious that the Chief did not appreciate being dragged in on a Saturday, especially under the circumstances. If only he knew that it was about to get worse.
"Lieutenant Benson said that you and your partner spoke to some of the jurors on Lewis's trial, seeing as they were the only ones who had access to the records of the injuries," Dodds started, and Fin nodded. "She also said that they may have said something to implicate one of them in this," he added and once again nodded.
"When they delivered the verdict, the forewoman said that they had concerns regarding the Lieutenant's conduct that they were not sure how to address, and that they wanted it on the record," Fin started, quoting the forewoman's word for word.
"Alright." Dodds urged him to continue.
"According to the ones we spoke to, the forewoman was the only one who had an issue! The rest were not only okay with it, but also said that the Lieutenant should've shot him!" Fin dead-panned and Olivia nearly chuckled at the grin plastered on his face as he said the last line. "They said that she was the only one who returned a 'not guilty' verdict on all four charges, and refused to budge. But when they said that they were gonna request a replacement, she caved and gave them the kidnap and assault, but claimed that she wasn't sold on the attempted rape and murder. And said that if she doesn't get to tell the judge about her 'reservations', that she will declare a hung jury, which will likely lead to a miss trial. And since by then they weren't sure if they still had the grounds to replace her, they came back with the verdict they delivered, and let her put her reservations on the record." He finished, and Olivia was shocked. The voice of the forewoman echoed in her head as she declared they found him not guilty of attempted rape and murder. She knew that her conduct was questionable, but like Dr. Lindstrom had told her, no one can really expect her to have any other reaction. She knew she beat Lewis while he was handcuffed, and she knew that when the forewoman testified to the grand jury that she gave him a brutal beating, that she was right. But she had lied, she had told everyone that she had lunged at her. And she can't come out and say it now, she never even openly admitted it to Barba. She knew that he knew she lied, but he never confronted her, and she didn't want to risk his job. She had come out in public and admitted that beating was brutal and uncalled for, but then Murphy stepped in and claimed it was a gambit to lure Lewis out, and she let him save her. But now…all of that may have led to an innocent girl going through hell for four days. The kind of hell she was all too familiar with.
"And that forewoman is the only one you still haven't talked to?" Dodds asked, and Fin shook his head.
"No, there's another one. But she's blonde," Fin told him, as if that explained everything, but Dodds looked confused.
"What does her hair color have to do with anything?"
"Well, as I was trying to say before you stalked off," Olivia nearly snapped. "Savina volunteers at the community center near where she lived, and on Monday, one of the parents offered to walk her home. Detective Carisi spoke with him, and he mentioned letting someone into Savina's building while he waited for her to let him know that she was safe inside her apartment," she continued, her tone still clipped, and slightly agitated.
"He gave you a description?" Dodds directed his question at Carisi.
"He said he didn't get a good look at her face, but she had red hair, pale skin, and was slightly overweight," Carisi listed off.
"And that matches the description of the forewoman," Dodds stated, not really waiting for an answer. "Can the vic ID her?" he wondered and Olivia shook her head.
"No, she said that either she was blindfolded, or the juror wore a mask. She said all she got is the voice."
Just then, the door to the office opened, and the other three walked in. Dodds, decided that this was his que to leave.
"Keep me posted of any developments," he ordered, before he took his leave.
Olivia took one look at the faces of those around her, and her heart dropped. She studied Barba, she knew him best. She saw a wide arrange of emotions flashing in his expressive eyes. His face was schooled properly, tense even. But his eyes, his eyes always betrayed him if you knew where to look.
"Sweetheart, we need to talk," he said softly, and she knew something was really up if he was calling her that at work.
A few minutes prior….
Barba and Melinda followed Amanda into the crib, and waited for her to close the door.
"Will someone tell me what's going on?" Barba now demanded impatiently.
Amanda sighed, finally coming to a decision about how to start. "When we came in earlier, I saw Savina's file open on Liv's desk," she started, and he nodded. "Did you read it?" she wondered, and once again he nodded. "Skimmed through it," he corrected.
"Did you notice the birthday?" she asked, and he nodded, his previously hardened stare softening significantly.
"Yes, I did."
"So you know the story?" Amanda alluded, and he sighed. "Yeah, I do. She told me about it after you told her Johnny D was Noah's biological father," he elaborated, directing his last statement at Melinda. "But what does that have to do with anything?" he asked, and Amanda sighed, handing him the file. He looked quizzically at her, but all she did was put her hands in her back pockets, as he popped open the file.
She saw his eyes land on the line in question, before an array of emotions clouded his eyes. She saw the fleeting moment of happiness, before the gravity of the situation dawned on him once more. Anger, pain, frustration all flashed in his eyes, before he finally looked up at her, and all she saw was sympathy. She just wasn't entirely sure if it was for Olivia, or Savina.
Barba couldn't believe his eyes, he read the line over and over again, his brain refusing to register the words he was actually reading. He simply refused to believe it, it couldn't be right. There must've been some mistake, a cross contamination of sorts.
The day he heard the sobbing story from Olivia was seared into his brain, the way she clung to Noah, the way she clung to him. He remembered the time it took him to get the mascara stains off his tie, the way his suit smelled of her for nearly a week. He felt happy, for a split second he forgot about the horrible situation they were in, he forgot about how exactly they came to make this connection, and merely thought of what it meant. But then it all dawned on him, and his heart sank. And that's when far too many emotions for him to name flooded him, and he finally raised his eyes to meet the pair that were currently studying him.
He looked at Melinda, his mouth opening to form a question, but she seemingly knew what was going through his mind. "I'm sure of the results," she stated before he got the chance to ask.
He nodded, almost on autopilot at this moment, before his eyes now found Amanda's. She looked like he felt!
"We figured you might know how to tell Liv," Amanda finally breathed, when it seemed like he wouldn't be saying anything.
Back in Olivia's office….
"You guys are scaring me," Olivia confessed, that sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach increasing when she saw Carisi reach behind Melinda and close the blinds, just like Fin did. They all stood in the office; Carisi with his back leaned against the door, Melinda and Amanda were both standing in front of the desk, with Amanda's hands in her back pocket, and Melinda's were buried deep in her lab coat. Fin merely stood behind the two women, one hand finding a fidgeting Amanda's shoulder to still her. Barba was the only one who made his way around the desk, and stood next to her. He had a file in his hand, one that he was clutching tightly…too tight! His knuckles were nearly white.
"There's a match on Savina's DNA," he spoke gently, and she gulped.
"Please don't tell me she's Johnny D's daughter too," she all but begged, and he shook his head.
"The hit wasn't criminal, it's law enforcement," he elaborated, and she gaped at him. A distant part of her brain made the connection, probably the part that was under the control of her heart, but the logical part quashed the idea. There was no way, she can't be. And yet….stranger things have happened. Her eyes wandered back to the picture of a smiling Savina on her desk, and she suddenly knew. She knew what Barba was going to say, she knew what was in that file, she knew why she looked familiar…she knew the truth.
But Barba didn't say anything, he merely opened the file in his hand, and gently placed it over Savina's, directly in Olivia's line of sight. He didn't do anything, didn't say anything. He let her find the line that would change her life forever.
Her eyes landed on the line in question instantly, and she stared at it. Her eyes frantically going over it again and again, even though a part of her knew before she actually read it, she was afraid of believing it. She felt Barba's comforting hand on her shoulder, and she finally cut her eyes to meet his.
He saw the tears glistening in her eyes, those beautiful terrified chocolate eyes. He saw the happiness, the confusion, the dread, the pain…..he saw the need in her eyes, the need for him to say it.
"Liv," he said softly, kneeling by her side at the desk, and holding her gaze steady. The hand that was on her shoulder, now moved to cup her cheek gently. "She's yours."
That did it. The tears that had pulled into her eyes, started to spill one by one. He saw the flicker of happiness, before the sadness and pain took over once more.
"But how?" she whimpered. "They gave me a dead baby!" she exclaimed tearfully.
"Olivia," Melinda now spoke, and waited till Olivia's broken gaze met her slightly steadier ones, before she continued. "Who are they?" she asked.
Olivia opened her mouth to answer, but closed it again, to stifle the sob that nearly escaped. She cast her eyes downwards, her gaze landing on the part of the picture that was peeking from under the file Barba placed in front of her. She pushed the file to the side, her fingers now tracing the smiling face before her.
"Liv," Fin called her gently, and she reluctantly raised her eyes to meet his. "Why don't you start at the beginning?" he suggested.
She took the picture into her hand, and she kept her gaze firmly on it. The distant echoes of pain-filled cries, drowning out the sounds of the two older women rang in her ears. She had spent nights recalling those few hours, how painful it was, the sweat that trickled down her face, how it seemingly took forever, the darkness that claimed her, and the silence that greeted her when she finally opened her eyes.
"I was still in patrol," she started, not even bothering to hold back the tears. It only made her voice all the more chocked up. "It was why I applied to SVU, I figured it was slightly less dangerous than the streets, and it was something that I wanted. I was living in Sheepshead bay, and I managed to keep it hidden till about the last week of the second trimester. I started to show, and the usual lie about weight gain was not cutting it anymore. Luckily, the transfer order to SVU came through, and I had enough time before I start to have the baby, and I had enough vacation days, so I took them off." She recounted, finally tearing her eyes away from the picture, and meeting Melinda's eyes. Who was now sitting in the chair in front of her office, and Carisi was perched on the back of Amanda's chair. Fin still stood behind the two women, with his hands shoved in his pockets, while Barba was now sitting on the armrest of her chair.
She took a shuddering breath. "That day I was out running some errands, I still had a couple of more weeks to term. There was a storm that night, and I was rushing home, when I started having contractions. I didn't have a cellphone, and the closest building was the church. I rushed inside and told the nuns to call an ambulance, but they said the phone lines were out because of the storm. I honestly thought they were Braxton Hicks, but my water broke. One of the nuns was a nurse, and when she checked, she said I was ready to start pushing." She chocked-out. "I fainted right after I delivered, I don't even remembering hearing her cry." She whispered tearfully, her voice shaking as she tried to get through the story without sobbing. "When I woke up, the room was awfully quiet, no sounds of a screaming infant, no babbling, no shushing, nothing. And they all looked very, very grim. They said that she wasn't breathing, and that they tried everything in their power, but she just didn't breathe, that she was gone." She finally broke down, turning her body to bury her face in Barba's chest, who silently wrapped his arms around her.
The room fell silent, save for the muffled sounds of Olivia's sobbing. The two people who were hearing the story for the first time were as silent as statues, with Carisi fighting back his tears, while Melinda let them freely cascade down her cheeks. She was a mother, so she knew how hard it was to lose one. How you keep telling yourself through the pain of labor, that at the end of it, you will have a beautiful healthy baby. That it will all be worth it in the end, that you just had to get through those few hours of pain to get to the joy. Just like the rest of the team, child cases always got to her more than they should. She understood how the parents felt, and this one was no different. Except now…..now it was personal.
Fin was the first to break the silence. "Liv, I know it's difficult, but can you think of any reason they would think you didn't want this baby?" he asked, and she shook her head, as she pulled back.
"Well, they had a dead baby, so this was planned." Carisi now interjected, his voice heavy.
"Maybe not, it could all have been a weird string of coincidences," Melinda refuted. "Unless you've been there before, and had told them something they interpreted as not wanting the baby," she added, and once again, Olivia adamantly shook her head.
"The first time I set a foot in that place was that night, and the only thing I said, was that she was early, and that I just wasn't ready, and a little scared. I never said I didn't want her," she growled adamantly.
"That's nothing. I said the same thing about my daughter!" Melinda argued softly. "It's natural, once it's time for the baby, it all becomes too real, and you freak out. It's hormones!"
"Carisi, why don't you go to the church, and try to find out how the hell did any of this happen. But don't let them know what's going on, I don't want them lawyering up!" Amanda ordered. "Can you hold off on putting this into the system until we get a chance to talk to Savina?" she directed her question at Melinda, who nodded. Her eyes cut out to Fin when his phone buzzed. "That's the canvas, they found the canary." He informed them.
"Why don't you take it?" Amanda suggested, and he nodded.
"Liv, I gotta ask. Did you tell anyone about this at the time? I mean, how come this never came up." Amanda asked, and Olivia nodded.
"My mother knew. I called her once the lines came back, and she was there when I buried her. I have the file at home, ultrasound pictures, as well as the birth and death certificates. And it never came up, because a couple of years into the job, I told Alex Cabot about it, and she managed to get those records sealed. There wasn't a hospital paper trail, so it wasn't that hard." She answered. "I didn't want some defense attorney finding out, and using it as leverage whenever they pleased." She explained, and Amanda nodded.
"And what about the father?" Carisi asked, and Olivia scoffed. "When I told him I was pregnant, he said he knew a guy who can take care of this, and no one will ever know. I showed up on his doorstep a week later, and had him sign away his parental rights. I never saw him after that."
"Okay, why don't we go talk to Savina, see what she has to say about any of this. And we'll take it from there." Amanda offered, and Olivia nodded.
"I need the names of the nuns who helped you deliver." Carisi piped up.
"There were only two; Sister Agnes, and Sister Teresa." She replied instantly, and he nodded.
So here it is folks, a new chapter, and a long one at that too. To those who guessed Savina's identity, nicely done.
I know that some things may deviate from the canon timeline, but A) I never watched the earlier seasons of SVU and B) this works better for the story.
Let me know what you all think of this, and I should have another chapter up fairly soon.
Thank you to all the new follows and favorites, and of course a special thank you to those who take the time to review.