Season: HI!
Narrator: Don't you "Hi!" Us. Where have you been!?
Season: Uhmmm... well...
Narrator: This better be good.
Season: Shut up and let me talk. So I understand I've been gone for a couple months...
Narrator: You recently posted a semi-amourshipping one-shot so you really don't have any excuse.
Season: I'm getting to my explanation. LET ME TALK!
Narrator: Someone's grumpy...
Season: You would be too if you're sick.
Narrator: Aren't you always sick when you leave this story on hiatus or something? Damn you have a weak immune system.
Season: ANYWAYS! I'm currently sick but I was working on this chapter for the last two months. I've gone through at least THREE different versions of what I wanted before I was satisfied. I was considering a new year's special at first but then I'm like naaaaah, then the second part was similar to what I have in his edit except that I changed some parts and kept them for the next chapter. I've decided to try to write that way.
Narrator: What way? You don't even have a writing style.
Season: To update and be writing a chapter to update soon. This way you guys know to expect a new chapter sooner or later.
Narrator: That's... not such a bad idea. I'm impressed. Can we keep sick you longer?
Season: I feel like death. Why would I want to feel like this just to satisfy your need for me to update? I'm about to deduct your pay again.
Narrator: SAVE ME! Please read and review!
Season: You don't deserve anything since you always try to put me into trouble with the readers. I love them all. Don't make them hate me.
Narrator: FINE!
[-]
Stupidity Does Not Earn You Heaven
by: Season Of Magic
{-}
"Alright, time to get up you little munchkin!" Dawn was literally shaking her seven year old awake.
"But mooooom it's Saturday!" Brianna whined.
Dawn encircled her arms around Brianna and dragged her up from bed. "Up! You! Go!"
"Hnnnnggg." Brianna said as she yawned multiple times.
"This is payback for Christmas." Dawn said trying her best not to laugh.
"But Christmas was months ago." Brianna attempted to break free from her mom but only failed and nearly dragged both of them down to the floor.
"Keep this up and you're not getting any s'mores tonight." Dawn stated.
Brianna's eyes light up. "Sugar!? Chocolate!?"
Dawn sighed. "That's what enticed you?"
Brianna let herself be held up by her mother and now appeared awake enough. "It's s'mores mom!"
"You're not going to be this enthusiastic when it's your turn to pitch the tent." Dawn couldn't help but say.
"I've been training all my life for this moment." Brianna stated.
Dawn wanted to roll her eyes. "Of course you have now go get changed and remember to dress warm."
Brianna nodded and as soon as she was finally free, ran straight to the bathroom. If she hit herself with the door on the way... no one had to know.
"We couldn't have just woken up at noon like normal people do on the weekends?" May couldn't help but ask as she and Ash made their way outside.
"Where'd be the fun in that?" Ash exclaimed.
"Yeah, fun." May said as they began the walk next door. "Not so much for me."
"We collected wood for this reason. We're making a bonfire remember?" Ash stated.
"I remember being out in the cold, collecting branches and other things with Brianna, yes." May said. "You however, had work." She added usung air quotes to state that Ash did not do anything.
"Oh shush." Ash said.
With their bickering they had made it to Dawn's front door in no time. May opened the door with her key.
"Are they still asleep?" Ash wondered as they walked inside.
"Nah! Dawn said she'd be waking up Brianna early as payback for Christmas." May said.
Both Ash and May took off their coats, hats and scarves while they waited to hear for sounds of life.
"I'll go start on coffee. You want some?" May asked as she began to walk towards the direction of the kitchen.
"Caffeine me up!" Ash exclaimed loudly.
Brianna heard their voices and ran from her room. "Mom! They're here!"
"Great, you called upon the great munchkin troublemaker good going Ash." May stated.
"I'm no troublemaker." Brianna said as she stuck her tongue out. "And only Ash and mom can call me munchkin." She said as she walked down the stairs.
"Hello munchkin." Ash said as he opened up his arms.
"Hello to you too," Brianna said as she noticed and tackled into Ash for the embrace. "Dad."
"Yes, pretend I'm not here." May replied, ruining the moment.
Brianna glared from Ash's embrace.
Dawn brought out her notebook and a pen. "Okay time to go over our list. Hot chocolate mix, marshmallows, graham crackers, chocolate bars, tea bags, rice, sausages... wait this is all food and that's not my handwriting."
Brianna glanced over and looked at it. "That's my list mom. I went shopping with May yesterday."
May nodded. "Yeah, and you forgot to add all the extra stuff we bought too. Hot dogs, buns, ketchup, mayonnaise." She said as she grinned.
"We're going camping for two days guys, it's not a week." Dawn couldn't help but state.
May nodded. "Right, of course." She said in agreement. "But have you forgotten how much Ash eats?" She couldn't help but add.
"That's true. Okay so since May and Bri have our food covered..." Dawn stated.
"And our firewood." Bri interrupted.
"And our firewood, apparently." Dawn said. "What's next?"
"I just need to bring the sleeping bags." Ash said.
Dawn nodded as she flipped over to the next page in her notebook where her checklist was at. "Sleeping bags... Check. Tents? I still have mine from when I was a coordinator and it's in good condition Bri and I should be able to use it."
"I still have mine too." May said.
"Wow, really? Mine broke after I was in Unova so I had to get it replaced." Ash said.
Dawn thought about it. "My tent was made of waterproof material maybe that's why it lasted so long?" She asked.
May glanced to Dawn knowingly. "Your mom got you that tent didn't she?"
Dawn nodded. "Yeah, why?"
"Our tents were probably from the same company." May nodded.
Now it was both Dawn and May who glanced to Ash in a saddened manner.
"Your tent lasted you enough." May said as she patted Ash.
Ash groaned. "Just because I was in a different financial situation from you guys doesn't mean I didn't have good things." He pouted.
May grinned. "We wouldn't have survived without Brock and you know it."
Ash laughed. "You're right! Man, I owe him a lot."
"Brock?" Dawn asked.
"He's Pewter City's gym leader." Brianna couldn't help but say. "Tracey and Gary both have said he also cooks really good."
"He was my travel companion for a couple of years." Ash said. "And so was May."
"Aren't you the daughter of a gym leader?" Dawn asked.
May nodded. "Yeah! I guess Ash just has some kind of luck attracting some sort of gym leader into his life."
Brianna leaned close to Dawn. "They used to travel together because he broke her bike."
Dawn rolled over from laughing. "He did what!?"
Brianna crossed her arms. "Sssh!"
Dawn stifled her laughter. "I can't believe it." She said in between giggles.
"Misty was a gym leader too, and he broke her bike as well." Brianna whispered again.
Dawn was in awe. "You're kidding munchkin."
"I'm not, mom." Brianna said. "You can ask May." She said as she pointed to her.
May glanced over. "Ask me what?"
"Is it true that Ash br— " Dawn started to say but Brianna covered her mouth.
"Ssssh!" Brianna said.
May blinked. "That Ash what...?" She asked curiously.
"N-nothing." Brianna said as she kept covering Dawn's mouth. She let go when Dawn licked her hand. "Moooooom!"
Dawn took a deep breath. "Seriously, I can't with you." She said shaking her head.
"Ewww I probably have cooties now." Brianna said with a sigh.
"Just go wash your hand you'll be fine." May said.
Brianna pouted as she stood up. "Don't. Say. Anything." She glanced to her mom as she began go walk away.
Dawn raised her hands as if in defeat. "Yes, because you're the adult here." If there was a moment she really wished she could roll her eyes, it was this one.
"I told you a secret mom and you slobbered all over my hand." Brianna said.
"Because I wasn't breathing." Dawn couldn't help but state.
"Okay look go wash your hand munchkin we have to go over the rest of the list anyways so whatever secret you have of mine... it's safe." Ash said.
"I'm watching you three." Brianna said.
"You can't watch us if you're in the bathroom washing your hands." May said snickering.
"So, what is the secret?" Ash asked when Brianna was out of earshot.
"A mom does not break a promise with her daughter." Dawn said. "Even if said daughter almost made me die from lack of oxygen." She added.
"You were fine honey." Ash said, "Now spill."
Dawn pretended to throw away a key. "My lips are sealed."
"Are you sure it's okay for us to use your van for this?" Dawn asked.
"Of course. Don't you think it's much easier for all of us to travel in one vehicle than split up and get lost on the way?" Ash said as he finished loading everything into the trunk.
"That's true but still it's your work van..." Dawn couldn't help but reply.
Ash winked. "And I'll be getting free publicity out of this trip so ssssh."
Dawn laughed. "Sneaky."
Ash laughed right along. "Guilty as charged." He closed the doors to the van and grinned. "All set."
"Great! I'll go get everyone."
"Nah, let me." Ash went and opened the driver's side and showed Dawn a megaphone. Then he walked inside to the house with it. Dawn followed him.
"Ash's Moving Service is now Ash's Camping Service! All of those who wish to ride ACS with destination to Viridian Forest... LAST CALL!"
Dawn shook her head and laughed. Then she grabbed the megaphone. "Munchkin get out here or else you're stuck watching the house by yourself for two days while we eat all your s'mores!"
Brianna, who was in the kitchen with May packing up the snacks for the road poked her head from the door. "Five more minutes! We're making sandwiches."
Gary and Tracey stared from the living room couch.
"Seriously, why are we friends with such nosy people?" Gary stated.
"Because you care about them." Tracey said. "I'm just here for the food."
"I'm here for the food!" Gary said. "You're here because you care."
Ash grinned. "If you're not in the van by the time May and the munchkin are done, I might have to show you guys just how much I care."
"By leaving you guys on house sitting duties. With no food." Dawn added.
"You two are scary when you agree with each other." Tracey said. "Aren't they Gary?"
Gary sighed. "Shut it! I'm trying to resign myself to my fate of having to listen to whatever music loser-ville here has on that van of his."
"We're playing Bri's playlist." Both Dawn and Ash said into the megaphone together. "SURPRISE!" Then they walked out the house snickering to themselves.
"House sitting doesn't seem that bad an idea..." Gary stated. "I can always order pizza."
Brianna hopped over with a bag full of foiled wrappers. "Gary, Tracey let's go! Let's go!"
Gary resigned to his fate.