Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. The song "Finding A Good Man" is by Danielle Peck and I do not own it in any way.
Desperado
Chapter One: Finding A Good Man
Blind dates and horror stories
Pushy gals and fast movers
Let's dedicate this girls' night out
To big-talkers, bad losers
"Marly?" Remus Lupin whispered, his voice barely audible as he eased his flatmate's door open. "Are you awake?"
When she didn't answer, Remus quickly and silently slipped into the room, which was dimly lit by a single flickering candle on a bedside table. Through the light, Remus could just make out the lime green robes draped over the window, acting as a curtain by blocking the afternoon sun, and the posters and pictures that were taped haphazardly on the walls.
"Marly?" Remus asked again, stumbling over a pile of dirty clothes and stubbing his toe on a box. "Damn it."
"Mmremush?" came a mumbled voice from underneath the pale green down comforter on the full size bed that Remus was struggling to make his way to.
"It's nearly two in the afternoon," Remus scolded gently, sitting down next to Marlene, Marly if you wanted to live to see another day, McKinnon, his lifelong best friend, and pulling the comforter down to reveal her face.
"So?" Marly asked, wiping her light blue eyes furiously as she began to wake up.
"So," Remus continued, a bit amused by the situation as a whole, "your work schedule on the refrigerator seems to say that you were supposed to be at work almost two hours ago."
"I'm sick," Marly explained in a pathetic voice. She brought Remus's hand to her forehead and said, "See? I have a fever."
"No, you don't. The only way you're sick is from the two pints of ice cream you ate last night," Remus smirked, but feeling her cheeks for good measure.
"That's why I'm sick, then," Marly pouted, trying to pull her comforter up again, but Remus held tight. "Come on, Remus, I want to mope."
"You've been moping over more or less two weeks now," Remus countered. "When are you going to resign to the fact that you do have to rejoin the living world?"
"Two to three more hours," Marly sighed, taking Remus's hand once more time and pulling him next to her, so her back was to his chest and his arm was wrapped around her tightly.
They sat silently like that for a few moments, and then Remus cleared his throat and asked in a soft, comforting tone, "Are you going to be okay?"
"Eventually," Marly admitted, letting Remus pull his fingers through her hair. "I don't know why I'm so upset about it all. Gerald was quite the git and, after all, I broke up with him."
"Why did you ditch him?" Remus asked gently, not having actually talked to her about it since it happened.
"Turns out he's married," Marly snorted, "with two kids."
"Oh, ouch."
"Yeah, apparently the blighter's wife found out, too," Marly added. "She blames me, naturally, and he didn't want me to get hurt. Maybe he should've thought about it before he got involved with someone that wasn't his wife."
"Maybe," Remus couldn't help but chuckle. This wasn't the first time Marly had caught herself up in some sort of scandal and been completely oblivious as to what was going on. "Does his wife know who you are?"
"No, thankfully," Marly replied. "Which is definitely good because I don't want to deal with the dungbombs and all that other childish stuff like from Timothy's girlfriend."
"Neither do I," Remus agreed, remembering how embarrassing it was to wake up to a dung covered front door.
"Oh, Rem, why is it we had to meet in the sandbox all those years ago?" Marly mused as Remus comfortingly ran his fingers through her brown curls that almost matched his perfectly.
"Well, I'm sorry," Remus replied, pretending to be hurt. "Would you like to move out and start over?"
"Shush," Marly retorted, swatting him over her shoulder. "You know what I mean."
"I'd have to say that the fact you made us sign a contract when were fourth years so stating that we would never be together that way makes it all your fault," Remus rolled his eyes, practically reciting from a script after having this conversation whenever Marly had a hard heartbreak, which seemed to be every other week.
"Oh, yeah," Marly sighed. "Besides, you're too tall for me."
Remus rolled his eyes once more and made a face behind Marly's head that included full sticking out his tongue and crossing his eyes.
"Stop making that face," Marly scolded without turning to look at him.
"What face?" Remus asked innocently, untangling himself from around Marly and sitting up.
"Don't play coy with me, Remus John," Marly replied, sitting up as well but bringing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them protectively.
"Whatever you say, Marlene Cecilia."
Remus glanced around the room again and made a disapproving noise from the back of his throat. "How can you live with it being so dark in here?" He reached up above the bed and tugged at her work uniform, allowing the sunlight to stream through the window and into the rest of the room, illuminating the rest of the chaos. "And how can you live with it being so damn messy in here?"
"I'm hardly ever in here, Mum," Marly scoffed, disdainfully feeling the messy mop of curls on her head that she called hair.
"You've been in here for nearly two weeks straight," Remus retorted, collecting her dirty laundry and placing it in her empty hamper. "Why do you have this if you don't use it?"
"Remus, you honestly sound just like my mum," Marly staggered out of the bed and to her feet, revealing the pyjama pants she'd stolen from Remus and her own tank top.
"You know, my grandmum gave me those for Christmas a few years back," Remus said offhandedly, glancing over his shoulder. "Those are my favourite pyjamas."
"They're a bit big in the waist," Marly jabbed at Remus, pulling open her closet door and fishing for some clothes to wear. "I don't know why you're making me get out of bed if I'm just going to move onto the sofa."
"That reminds me," Remus turned to face her, folding what he assumed to be a clean sweater. "Lily stopped by Flourish and Blotts today on her lunch. Apparently the two of you were supposed to meet for lunch today - "
"Oh, bloody hell," Marly swore, choosing a brown sweater. "That's the second time this week I've forgotten. That gets hung."
"Anyway, she said that since you stood her up you have to go out with a bunch of people tonight," Remus finished, sidestepping Marly to go to her closet.
"Great," Marly groaned, ripping her dresser open to extract some jeans and undergarments. "Girls' night out."
"You know, getting out of the house might be good for you," Remus replied, turning to make her bed. "You're supposed to meet her at some Muggle pub in London. It's on the same block as Diagon Alley and all that."
"Muggle?" Marly scrunched up her nose.
"I guess," Remus shrugged, smoothing out the comforter. "She said she had big news."
"She didn't tell you what it was?" Marly asked, holding her clothes to her chest with her hip jutted out.
"She probably wanted it to be a surprise and she knows that you know how to manipulate me," Remus shrugged.
"Well, whatever, I'm going to go take a shower," Marly sighed, backing out of the room. "And, Rem, stop cleaning my room."
"We both know that if I don't do it, you certainly never will," Remus cocked an eyebrow. "That's why I do your laundry, too."
"You're so strange," Marly pointed out.
"Yet you keep me around."
"You pay half the rent, clean my room, and do my laundry," Marly smirked. "And no romantic attachment whatsoever. What more could I ask for?"
"I'm glad that's all I am to you," Remus replied, fluffing her pillows.
"Basically, yes," Marly grinned, turning down the hallway to the bathroom. "Showering!"
"About bloody time," Remus shouted back, an amused expression on his face.
"Marly!" Lily Evans exclaimed over exuberantly, nearly knocking her drink over as she very furiously waved to her friend as she walked through the front door. "Marlene McKinnon, over here!"
"I can see you, Lily," Marly smirked, clutching her purse close to her as she made her way over to the table that her group of friends were sitting at.
"I'd started to think you were dead," Adrianna McKinnon, Marly's younger sister, joked as she pushed Lily's drink out of her elbow space.
"Well, Anna, if you'd come and visit me ever so often, perhaps your mind would've been put at ease," Marly shot back, taking a seat between her two other friends, Sheila Applegate and Katherine Reynolds.
"Look, Marly, I knew you'd want a brandy so I ordered it for you already," Lily grinned, her eyes wide as she pushed the drink toward Marly.
"How long have you guys been here?" Marly addressed her other friends, not being able to suppress a grin at how Lily was acting.
"Hardly an hour," Katherine shook her head, looking as amused as Marly felt, as she took a drink of her seltzer water.
"You know how Lily is," Sheila put a hand over her mouth and lowering her voice so only Marly could hear her. "She just needs to smell a drink to get inebriated."
"Hey!" Lily's eyes managed to get wider, threatening to fall out. "No secrets at this table!"
"Of course, Lily," Sheila smiled. "I was only telling Marly how amazing you look tonight."
"Oh!" Lily exclaimed, grinning widely. "Thanks!"
"So," Marly took a sip of her drink, scrunching up her nose after tasting it. "Other than the disgusting drinks, what brings us to this fine Muggle pub establishment?"
"There's someone I want you to meet," Lily continued grinning. "He had to step out, but he'll be back and then you're going to meet him and fall deeply in love and shag." She began to giggle.
"Lord, Lily," Anna rolled her eyes. "I'm glad to see that after nearly twenty years of life you're still as mature as when I met you our first year."
"She was still immature when I got to know her my sixth year," Marly added, mixing her drink with the short, yellow straw. "But, I'm sorry, Lily, your plan has been thwarted."
"Why might that be?" Sheila asked. "Find a new guy already?"
"Just the opposite," Marly held her head up with dignity. "I'm swearing off men."
"Oh, yeah, all right," Anna rolled her eyes. "Come on, Marly, you were sneaking boys into our house when you were only a third year through Floo Powder."
"I'm serious!" Marly crossed her arms. "I am through with men. I'm sick of finding this seemingly perfect guy and then finding out there's some fatal flaw - like they're married."
"You know what really gets me," Sheila spoke up, "is when they're such bad mama's boys that they can't even stick up for themselves."
"At least you've never had one cheat on you," Anna grimaced, then put on a sly grin. "Then again, I'm sure he won't be cheating any time soon after what I did to him."
"However, that doesn't change what Anna said, Marly," Lily grinned. "You wish you could get by without a man."
"Excuse me, Miss Evans, I am a strong, independent woman of the 70s - in fact," Marly protested, holding up her drink. "I so swear on the holiness of the traditional girls' night out that I will be man free for, oh, I don't know - "
"A year!" Sheila suggested.
"No, it has to be an actual realistic amount of time," Anna shook her head. "I give her, ah, six months."
"I can do that," Marly replied confidently as the other women clinked their glasses together. Marly made another face after drinking the brandy and turned to see that the bartender was still vacant from the bar.
"Ah, the joys of being happily married," Katherine grinned, flashing her left ring finger happily.
"Oh, sod off, Kath," Anna playfully elbowed her friend in the side.
"Anyways, Lily, onto the topic of the hour," Katherine interrupted the man bash, putting a hand on her swollen belly. "What is this big news you promised to tell us once Marly got here?"
"Hey, don't blame me for my tardiness!" Marly put up her hands in protest. "It was Remus's fault - he managed to lose the sweater I wanted to wear while doing my laundry."
"Remus does your laundry?" Sheila asked, raising her eyebrows.
"Yeah, he's anal like that," Marly waved her hand in dismissal. "I'm definitely not complaining, though."
"So much for strong and independent," Anna mumbled under her breath, causing Marly to through her straw across the table at her.
"Excuse me," Lily interrupted, allowing Marly to marvel in how well her other best friend could speak, given her current state. "I do, in fact, have some big news that, well, definitely clashes with Marly's oath. Last night," her face suddenly split into a huge grin and she thrust her left hand out, which she had been carefully hiding for the right moment, "James asked me to marry him!"
"About damn time," Sheila scoffed, then gave a congratulatory smile to the bride-to-be.
"It was so sweet," Lily sighed, a dreamy look on her face. "I came home from work and he had the entire flat filled with lilies and there was a huge box on the kitchen table - "
"Oh, I totally gave him that idea," Marly interrupted.
"And I had to keep opening smaller boxes until I got to the one with the ring and, oh, it was so sweet," Lily finished, sighing deeply.
"Did you guys talk about a date yet?" Anna asked.
"Yeah, December 17, 1978," Lily smiled.
"That's in just over six months, Lily," Katherine reminded her. "Quite the short engagement."
"Oh, please, they might as well have been together since they were first years," Sheila interrupted. "The sexual tension was there at least."
"I thought Gryffindor Tower was going to collapse after they finally shagged without it lingering in the air," Anna added with a smirk.
"Against my better judgement," Lily interrupted again, her cheeks slightly flushed, although Marly didn't know if that was from the conversation or the alcohol. "I want you all to be my bridesmaids. I won't take no for an answer. There will be dire consequences if you even think about it."
"I'll have popped by then, thankfully," Katherine nodded. "It was horrific when my sister-in-law stood up in my wedding, remember? She wouldn't stop complaining."
"Oh, Marly!" Lily said excitedly. "There he is, come on!"
"Fine," Marly sighed, taking her drink and getting to her feet. "Although, I'm sure you remember that oath I made just moments ago?"
"We all know you're going to break it," Lily rolled her eyes, taking Marly's arm and dragging her to the bar, where a tall, good-looking man with black hair was bartending. When she stopped, she leaned on the bar for support, as she had already passed her limit. "Okay, here we are - Marly, this is Sirius Black. Sirius, this is Marly McKinnon."
"Uh, Lily, Sirius and I have met," Marly raised an eyebrow, then lowered her voice. "We're all in the Order together, unless you somehow forgot."
"Just how much did you drink?" Sirius asked Lily, not bothering to hide his amused expression as he wiped the bar down.
"James told me that you were complaining that the two of you have never been properly introduced," Lily addressed Sirius. "He also said something about how Marly was quite the fox and you wouldn't mind getting into - "
"And this is where you'll stop talking, Lily," Sirius gave an apologetic look to Marly as he put his hand over Lily's mouth.
"Did you make this drink?" Marly asked accusingly, putting the glass on the bar.
"Brandy?" Sirius asked, not taking his hand off Lily's mouth, who was fighting with all her might. "Yeah, I think so."
"It's horrid," Marly said plainly.
"Well, I'm sorry, miss, this is my second night and I'm used to Butterbeer and firewhiskey," Sirius retorted, finally removing his hand and allowing Lily to breathe. "That's what your nose is for, Lily."
"Before you two start hating each other and then have a make up shag - "
"Lily, must you always be so crude when you're drunk?" Marly asked as Sirius turned to make her a new drink.
" - I want to inform you both that you're the best man and maid-of-honour for James and my wedding," Lily continued as though Marly hadn't said anything.
"James already told me," Sirius said over his shoulder. "I helped him set everything up."
"Me, Lily?" Marly asked. "Are you sure? I mean, you've known Anna, Katherine, and Sheila ages longer than me - "
"Yet, you are my best friend," Lily interrupted. "Yes, I'm sure."
"Here is your drink, her majesty," Sirius put down the glass in front of Marly.
"Thank you," Marly sniffed, then took a sip from the drink. "That's better."
"I'm glad I could aid in making you happy," Sirius smirked. "Now, if you ladies don't mind, I have other customers to tend to."
Once he was out of earshot, Lily turned to Marly. "Well?"
"Well what?" Marly asked. "Lily, do you honestly think Sirius Black is the kind of guy I'd go for?"
"What's wrong with him?" Lily asked, crossing her arms defiantly. "He's got a great sense of humour, he has a huge heart, he's fun to hang out with, brave, smart, incredibly handsome - "
"Then why don't you date him?" Marly suggested.
"Somehow I don't think James would appreciate me dating his best mate," Lily pondered for a moment. "Anyway - what's wrong with him?"
"He isn't my type," Marly replied, taking a drink from her brandy. Noticing the look Lily was giving her, she exclaimed, "What?"
"Oh, you're right, Marly," Lily sighed. "He definitely isn't your type. Besides, he isn't married, doesn't have any children, and has no criminal record. Where's the fun in that?"
"Lily, I gave that man more detentions when I was Head Girl than any other person at Hogwarts," Marly stuck her thumb in Sirius's direction. "Just lay off, all right?"
"Yeah, yeah," Lily rolled her eyes. "But, you're really missing out on what could be something great."
"Lily, if we're meant to be, it'll happen," Marly replied. "However, I can guarantee you that there is no chance that it would work out between Sirius Black and me."
"Whatever," Lily shrugged, leading Marly back to the table. "That's what you say."
"Stop saying stuff like that," Marly grumbled. "You know that when you pretend to be a Seer you're never right, right?"
"I am this time," Lily allowed a smile to play on her lips and then sat back down. "Now, girls, what do you think about colours for dresses?"
Author's Note: See? Much longer than the intro. :-) Not much to say other than thanks so much for reading and please let me know what you think!