AOE Saga
Alchemic Blend
Chapter 1: Interdimensional Idiots
The crew of the BiNebular had finished their two-week's vacation and had returned to the Resistance's Headquarters. It was in a secluded region of the galaxy where it would be very hard to find. Occasionally Imperial forces found it, but they were taken care of very quickly. The Headquarters had everything the troops needed for training; space hanger, VR combat training, armory, science lab, and sparing gym.
Draco and Chip had just finished their guard round and were hanging out in the brig of the BiNebular. Draco got bored with the computer games and was now fooling around with the dimensional door to the Chateau. "You should be careful with that," said Chip, "You could open it to a very dangerous dimension." Draco made a raspberry and said, "What could happen?" He then opened it onto a strange world with swirling colors and several platforms. The weird part was there were many food shops, kiddie rides, and other silly stuff. "What kind of weirdo dimension is this?" asked Draco. Suddenly PlasMorph came out of one of the shops. "PlasMorph? What are you doing here?" asked Chip. But several more PlasMorphs started coming out of the buildings along with duplicates of other people. Draco and Chip recognized Peter Griffin, Bart Simpson, Patrick Star, Billy, and several other cartoon characters that were well known for their lack of intelligence. Suddenly they started walking towards the doorway. Chip quickly grabbed some pastries they had brought with them for lunch and threw them over the heads of the duplicates. "Pie!" yelled a Billy. "Cake!" yelled a Peter Griffin. "Mmm, donuts," said a Bart Simpson. The duplicates quickly ran towards where the desserts had fallen. Chip and Draco quickly shut the door while they were all distracted. "What was that place?" asked Draco. "You know how there are some universes where smartness reigned supreme?" said Chip, "That place was the polar opposite. It's known as Dimension SMID." "SMID?" asked Draco. "Stupid Moronic Idiotic Dummies," explained Chip, "That place is filled with hundreds of duplicates of the dumbest beings known to exist. It is not a dimension to tamper with." "Okay," said Draco, "let me open one more door and then we'll get back to work." He pushed the randomizing button on the number panel near the door and opened it again, as Chip went to get more snacks.
Meanwhile in another dimension, four alchemists were working in their workplace. But these were not ordinary alchemists at all. In fact, they weren't even human. One alchemist resembled Bladebeak from 'Quest for Camelot' except he had arms like eagle's legs, eagle's wings coming out of his back, a cat's tail and legs, and two catlike ears poking out of his mantle making him a griffin instead of a chicken. Another was like a sea turtle with the head, hind legs, and tail of a calf. A quiver full of arrows was attached to her back and two launchers were on her flippers to shoot arrows. The only thing she wore was a metal cap with an arrowhead on it. The third alchemist pretty much resembled a sword with a golden dragon's head for a handle. The blade had the mark of a dragon's head breathing fire on it and was inflated to make more solid. His arms were the hilt and the wings were the scabbard split into half and mounted on the back of his shoulder blades. His tail was the belt to hang the scabbard on. The last alchemist had the body of an hourglass except the legs had separated to be four real legs and arms. The sand in the upper half had taken the form of a head with black eyes, a flat nose, and a turban fastened with an opal. There were two flip-open sundials on either side of the hourglass that had a mouth running along the part that jutted out when the sundial was flipped open. "Drat," said the griffin, "I'm out of bat wings again." "We'll go with you, Griffaxe," said the sea turtle, "we need to get some more material too. Right Ostarus?" "Right Bowturtle," said the hourglass. The three headed for the door to the supply closet. Griffaxe paused and said to the dragon/sword, "Drakesword, check the magic door. I think there's something trying to get in." "Yeah, yeah, sure," said Drakesword. Drakesword walked to the door, which had the ability to open to any place. He opened it to see what was on the other side.
Draco and Drakesword found themselves looking at each other in the face. "Is this another universe with duplicates?" they both thought. They started doing silly dragon-like antics in perfect symmetry. They thought for a second and stepped away from the doorway. Then they ran back and made a funny face. Then Drakesword disattached his wings and tail and started doing a very strange dance. "Oh, I can't do that," thought Draco and he walked out of the brig. Just then Ostarus walked back into the workplace and saw Drakesword was still dancing. "Er, Drakesword," said Ostarus. "Can't you see I'm busy Ostarus?" asked Drakesword. "Doing what?" Drakesword fully realized that Ostarus was there and said, "Uh, nothing, there's a weird duplicate dimension on the other side of the door." "Again?" said Ostarus and he walked toward the door. At around the same time, Draco had told Chip about what he saw and Chip went to investigate. Chip and Ostarus gave each other one look and said to each of their dragon-like friends and said, "You were right. That is one weird duplicate dimension." "Wait," said Ostarus, "I'm not a duplicate." "Me either," said Chip. They moved their hands close to each other and extended their pointer fingers. A spark leapt between the fingers and both of them gave a yipe and withdrew their hands. "What kind of creature are you?" asked Ostarus. "I'm a genetic experiment," said Chip, "Who and what are you?" "I am Ostarus, a sand djinn who is the Earth Member of the Walking Blades." "A sand what?" asked Draco. "In more simple terms, a genie," said Drakesword. "And who are you?" asked Chip. "I am Derrick Drakesword, Fire Member of the Walking Blades." "Are there Wind and Water members too?" asked Draco. "Sure," said Ostarus and turned towards his side yelling, "Griffaxe! Bowturtle! Get over here!" Griffaxe and Bowturtle walked over to the doorway and asked, "Who are these guys?" "I'm Draco," said Draco. "I'm Chip," said Chip. "Nice to meet you," said Bowturtle, "I am Carol Bowturtle, Water Member of the Walking Blades. And in case you're wondering what I am, I'm a Mock Turtle." "And I am Louis Griffaxe, Wind Member and leader of the Walking Blades." "What exactly are the Walking Blades?" asked Chip. "We're alchemists," said Griffaxe, "We wander through the many worlds of the multiverse, seeking out all new forms of magic. We're like magical scientists." "I thought alchemy was the search for the Philosopher's Stone," said Chip. "Been there, done that," said the Walking Blades. "Do you mind us moving to your dimension?" asked Griffaxe, "It would be easier to talk with you." "We don't mind," said Draco and Chip. "Is there a large open plain we could use?" asked Drakesword. "There's one a couple of miles from here," said Draco. "Great! Meet us there," said Ostarus and the doorway closed. Chip looked at Draco and said, "Do you think this is a good idea?" "Hopefully it is," said Draco. Suddenly the doorway opened to Dimension SMID again and a Dr. Zoidberg came out saying, "I demand anchovies." Draco grabbed a chair and pushed it against Dr. Zoidberg and said, "Back! Back, you smelly beast! Back!" Dr. Zoidberg was forced back through the doorway, which Chip closed. "We have got to get this thing fixed," said Chip.
Here's the start of a new fanfiction. In case you can't place where the SMID residents are from, Peter Griffin is from 'Family Guy', Bart Simpson is from 'The Simpsons', Patrick Star is from 'Spongebob Squarepants', Billy is from 'The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy', and Dr. Zoidberg is from Futurama. I'll try to get pictures of the Walking Blades onto as soon as I can get a scanner. Please review.