AN at the bottom.

--

Chapter Fourteen

The Gravity of Conversation

Thud, thud, thud. Thud.

A very groggy Quistis stood up and stretched. She was not yet sure where she was, why she was so comfortable, and/or why there was a strange thumping sound piercing her brain. All of her morning rituals seemed as far away as the moon. She looked down.

She was wearing a creamy soft bathrobe (currently not-wrapped around her in a quite inappropriately revealing manner) and was surrounded by the remains of a yellow towel army. Little heaps and puddles of soft butter-yellow towel peeked out at her amidst the mess she had made of her bed. She tied the bathrobe properly, ignored the towels, and went for the door.

Rinoa was standing there, pounding on the door with a look of amusement on her face. She lowered her hand as the door opened. "I thought I'd be knocking for days," she said, giggling at the sight of Quistis in her bathrobe.

"Good morning," Quistis replied, not knowing what to do other than be proper and polite.

Rinoa smiled. "Squall wants me to tell you that there will be a short debriefing meeting this morning, and a full Garden Council hearing based on your findings tomorrow, if you want."

"What time is the debriefing?" Quistis asked.

"Whenever you wake up," Rinoa said with a wicked grin. "We thought you were going to sleep forever. Squall and I made a bet, actually," she continued conversationally. "He said that you'd be up at 6 AM because it was programmed into your brain and you couldn't operate any other way. And I said you'd sleep for a really long time because you'd just been in jail and were really off schedule."

Quistis, amused, leant her weight against the doorframe and asked, "Who wins?"

"I dunno," Rinoa said, chewing her lip. "Not Squall, certainly, cause it's almost 10, but I'm not sure if it counts as a long time, so I don't know if I win either." She flashed Quistis a girlish grin. "It doesn't matter, the bet was mostly dinner, so either way I win."

"Mostly dinner?"

Rinoa's grin turned decidedly, if cheerfully, evil. "Dinner and a little prize," she said. "Regarding Selphie's masquerade."

"Oh," Quistis said miserably. "I don't suppose I'll be able to escape that."

"Probably not," Rinoa said, looking down at the floor. "Actually, um..."

Quistis tilted her head. "What's wrong, Rinoa?"

The girl's posture - her hands clasped behind her, face towards the ground, shoulders swinging slowly - was suddenly deferential, submissive.

"Well," Rinoa began, very hesitantly. "I was wondering if I could, uh, help you get ready for the banquet and all," she said shyly. "I always like getting ready with other girls, see, and Selphie will be so busy all day, and plus I figured you wouldn't have anything to wear since you just got back from, uh, jail, and you might need some help..."

Quistis paused for a moment - oh god, girl talk, getting ready and makeup and oh, the horror - but then she realized: I need to talk to Rinoa anyway, I should be nice, and she's right - I don't have anything to wear.

She gave Rinoa a real, genuine smile and said lightly, "I'd love that."

Rinoa grinned at her. "I was hoping," she said, all in a rush. "I mean, you're the other girl, and I know you're not all that girly, but I like girls - well, I like guys too, but anyway - really, I'd like to hang out with you once in a while. Plus I have some really awesome ideas for your costume."

Quistis wondered whether Squall's lost bet had anything to do with Rinoa's "awesome ideas," but she bit her tongue and said simply, "I'm glad."

"I mean, we wouldn't want you to look horrible for your first banquet back," Rinoa said, teasing lightly but also slightly serious.

"Well," said Quistis, "I could always go as a SeeD Instructor."

"Ah!" Rinoa cried in mock horror. "Perish the thought!" And she and Quistis started laughing.

"Anyway," Rinoa said, once she'd caught her breath, "I'm to escort you to Squall's office once you're ready. Then I think you have to get the Kadowaki once-over - ew! - and then I'm assuming you'll be getting ready for the meeting tomorrow, so I'll come find you here?"

Quistis nodded. "Alright, tell Squall I'll be up."

"Actually," Rinoa said, looking a little hesitant, "Squall said I have to escort you. There's some rule-y thing." She shrugged.

"Oh, right," Quistis said, nodding her head in realization.

Rinoa quirked her head. "What's it mean?"

"Oh," Quistis smiled. "I'm still an active target and cannot go anywhere unescorted until my report has been made."

The shorter girl made a face. "Ew, really?"

"Part of the Prisoner-Of-War Amendment, Part II," Quistis quoted, shaking her head. "I don't believe I forgot about that."

Rinoa grinned and stood up in a mock salute. "I'll guard the door, ma'am! You just throw on your uniform, or whatever, and then we'll mosey on up to the Commander's office!"

Quistis genuinely laughed. (Although one did not just throw on a SeeD uniform; a SeeD uniform was earned, and one put it on as one would proudly wear a medal. Rinoa, however, was not a SeeD, and so Quistis kindly forgave her and went inside to change.)

Quistis was 'escorted' to the Commander's office and dropped off with the same silly salute. Inside, she found a busy, focused-looking Squall working through some papers, and a slightly-amused Xu working through a crossword puzzle.

"Quistis," Squall greeted, with a nod towards an empty chair. Xu immediately stood and left; Quistis shot Squall a questioning glance which was answered as Xu quickly returned with a fresh cup of coffee. The mug was bright red and read Who's your daddy? in bold white letters. Quistis shot it another questioning glance.

"From Rinoa," Squall said. "She thought it was funny."

Quistis laughed and sipped at the coffee, smiling at Xu gratefully. "It's almost a Laguna joke, Squall."

Squall briefly rolled his eyes. "I'm sure he'd think it was hilarious," he said, deadpan. "Anyway. Let's have a quick debriefing so that I know what to prepare for tomorrow's beatdown."

Quistis smiled into her cup. She admired Squall's sharp ability to change a subject away from anything regarding Laguna, Rinoa, or the two of them having the same stupid sense of humour.

"Mission details, and then timeline," Xu suggested as she lowered herself behind her prized laptop, volunteering herself to act as the briefing stenographer. Her fingers began to blur over the keys as she tapped. "Trepe, acting mission ID..." her voice trailed off as she entered the appropriate details. Quistis knew that the voice recorder on the laptop was also running, but Xu never missed a detail.

"Right," Squall said, his voice becoming serious. "For the record, this is Balamb Garden Commander Leonhart, debriefing Special Investigator Quistis Trepe. Trepe, your mission entailed investigation and resolution of the situation revealed by the Kinneas-Tilmitt mission last month: mainly, the investigation of traitorous entities within Garden. Please summarize your findings at this point."

Quistis looked down into her coffee. "As stated in the Kinneas-Tilmitt mission report, falsified mission documents were found - the first sign of this subterfuge. The documents were traced back to a division of a scientific organization called Elsevier. Elsevier is a widely-known scientific research organization, but the branch of neomagic and Source magic research has recently split off from the main administration."

She took a sip. "This branch of the organization is housed in Argun, Esthar. They are fiercely interested in secretly recruiting SeeD, but as far as evidence goes have shown no interest in legal hiring. Their research involves pro-Sorceress political groups - ones who want to harness Source Power for global use."

Quistis paused, took another sip to gather her thoughts. Squall was watching expectantly, taking notes on a clipboard; Xu's fingers had been hitting in tandem with her words and paused as she paused; the absence of tapping filled the room.

"This branch of Elsevier is linked closely with Galbadia Garden," she said, and watched as Squall's eyes flew up from his page to her face. "Initially, emails were tracked between the two organizations through Galbadia's computer network. I then followed the leads and investigated further. The operation is receiving funding from Galbadia, marked with Garden Certified Code linking it to Galbadia, and authorized by Martine's GCC access code. Era Maxus, Commander of G.-Garden, appears to be one of the main contacts with this organization. At the point of this discovery my investigation was halted by my imprisonment."

Squall jotted a few brief words down, and then began: "And this imprisonment ...?"

"Yes," Quistis confirmed, "I was taken captive while in Galbadia Garden itself, by Commander Maxus himself, so I can verify his involvement."

Squall had stopped writing. He opened his mouth with a question, but Quistis said very softly, "There is one more thing that might be pertinent to current Garden operation." She paused, watching Squall's eyes flick down to his page and then back to her face. "Elsevier's files state very clearly that they are framing Seifer Almasy, former Balamb Garden student."

Even Xu's head snapped up at this one in surprise. Quistis took a hasty sip of coffee and continued, "They have set him up to appear as the leader of this Elsevier organization. Rumours abound in Argun about the leader, known as Grey, whose physical characteristics and temperament fit Cadet Almasy. However, I found documentation outlining the plan to spread these rumours and frame Almasy as Grey in Elsevier's files: to the point of keeping Cadet Almasy a prisoner in the city of Argun."

There was an extended pause, and then Squall sank slowly back into his chair and said very clearly, "Well, shit."

"On or off the record, Commander?" Xu murmured.

"Oh. Urgh. Off the record, Xu," Squall replied vaguely with an even vaguer hand wave, his thoughts obviously elsewhere, and Quistis shot an amused glance across to Xu. The stenographer did not return it.

"That's ... news," Xu began. "Are you sure you...?"

"Am I sure what?" Quistis asked.

Squall was currently rubbing his eyebrows, pinching the bridge of his nose in confusion. "Are you sure you didn't get it backwards, Quistis. That Seifer Almasy is behind this branch of Elsevier and he is framing Era Maxus."

Quistis bristled. "I am quite sure, Commander," she retorted. "Although I have no concrete proof at this time, with a proper GCC warrant we can seize documents from Elsevier which will prove that Cadet Almasy is the target of -"

"Okay, Quistis," Squall said, raising his hand to her, the other splaying itself across his eyes. "I believe you. But no one else will. You realize that, right?"

Xu's voice floated up from the back of the room. "Shall I insert a stop in the recorder? Or should we move on to the timeline?"

Squall shook his head briefly, as if to settle the thoughts better, and then nodded. "Continue. Timeline, Trepe."

She stopped abruptly, trying to hide her discomfort by gulping the remains of her coffee and making a full-mouthed gesture to the alcove where Xu kept the coffee-pot. Squall looked at her quizzically but nodded, and Xu inserted a pause into the tape recorder. She felt a momentary flash of very unprofessional panic. What in Hyne's Green Heaven was she going to say about meeting Almasy?

Lie? Or tell the truth? Her mind whirred as she slowly poured fresh coffee into the glaringly bright red cup. She could simply say she'd been knocked out in the apartment complex, and woken up in Trabia: no harm done, and Seifer would be left alone. But then there'd be a lie on her perfect record, and if that came out, all hell would break loose for her and Almasy and Shain and everyone. However, if she confessed, she'd have to stop Squall (and, much more likely: Xu) from sending out the SeeD Special Ops team to drag Almasy in. Yes, she'd given them a city, but that was much different than saying Yes I saw Almasy and worst of all, I didn't get him. He got me.

Plus, she'd have to admit that Raijin had taken her down.

Quistis bowed her head over the cup as it dawned on her: she'd made her choice the second she'd opened up to Headmaster Shain - no, to Shain Sheridan, who had been her friend and confidant, the one she had gone to for advice. If she'd been able to say it to Shain, she should be able to say it to Squall and Xu, the two people who quite possibly knew her better than anyone on the planet, although neither would have admitted to it.

And then she'd have to go to Shain and ask him to forget what she had said, ask him to help her cover a lie: and it was this fact, this imagined conversation, that settled the guilt directly into her stomach.

So Quistis sat down, sighed, and laid out her mission in blunt, bleak detail.

--

She'd been in debrief all day long, it seemed; together, the three officers had defeated an entire pad of paper and two point five pots of coffee. Quistis had come up with a giant decision tree tracking each branch of her investigation, the information she had received, and how it all related back to Elsevier and/or Grey.

Her mind was exhausted. Its tiny wheels had been turning all day long; she needed to recharge her batteries.

Xu had then walked her to Doctor Kadowaki's office. The verbal debrief was, in many ways, the easy part; Kadowaki's medical and physical debriefings were intense. They were viewed as highly necessary - the possibility of a SeeD coming back from captivity with, say, a rogue GF implanted in her brain was dangerous enough to chill even stoic Squall - but the necessity was not enough to make the experience charming.

Kadowaki, luckily, was as close to an old friend of Quistis's as Xu was, and so the process of blood draws, sensitivity scans, magical histories, and muscle examinations wasn't quite as painful as it could have been. But it was still exhausting. Quistis trudged up to her dorm room with Rinoa (who had come to 'escort' her and was clearly worrying her bottom lip over having enough time to get ready for Selphie's benefit dance) and begged the girl for an hour or two of respite.

The nap was amazing.

And, right on time, there was a pounding on her door.

Rinoa came in, hauling what looked to be a suitcase behind her. Quistis's eyes widened at the sight of it and Rinoa laughed charmingly at her, saying, "Well, I had a couple ideas, so I brought everything I could think of. And I ran into Selphie, and she gave me an awesome idea. And I haven't looked through your stuff yet!"

The small brunette tucked the case-on-wheels next to Quistis's bed and hauled herself into the bedroom, where Quistis heard her making short work of the immaculately organized closet. The instructor tentatively took a step towards Rinoa's case, somewhat irrationally afraid that the thing would swallow her whole.

There was a very girly squeal - high enough to summon Angelo, Quistis feared - and then Rinoa threw herself back around the corner with her arms full of something shimmery and blue and said, "Quistis, where on earth did you get this?"

Quistis focused her gaze on Rinoa's armful as the girl shook it out: it was a dark blue dress, shimmery, with tiny sparkles on it. "No idea, Rinoa. Do you want it?"

"I'm already dressed, Quisty. It's for you," Rinoa said, smiling wickedly. "Here, put it on. I think I've got something."

Quistis stepped modestly into her bedroom and tugged the sleek dress on over her head. By the time she emerged, Rinoa had created what looked like a battlefield of cosmetics and accessories across the bedspread.

"So here's the plan," Rinoa said, looking at Quistis with a particularly mischievous look. "You know how Zell and the other students always joked around, called you the Ice Queen? Back when you were an Instructor and before you were, like, people's friends? Well, we're going to dress you up as Shiva, and make you a real Ice Queen, what do you think? Selphie thought of it!"

Quistis looked at the gleam in Rinoa's eyes and gave up all hope of retaining her dignity. Before you were, like, people's friends? Ouch

"Look, Rinoa," she said, as the girl settled her down into a chair and grabbed an entire handful of select cosmetic products, "I need to ask you a question - something serious."

"I'm not spilling the beans on me and Squall," Rinoa replied cheerily in a sing-song voice. "Nice try, though."

"No - um, no," Quistis said hastily. Gods, no. "It's about Seifer."

She felt Rinoa's hand freeze against her face; convinced that the application of paint supplies had stopped for a moment, Quistis tilted her head upwards.

Rinoa was very deliberately not meeting her eyes.

"Is something wrong?"

Rinoa, her eyes still trained on the floor, gave a very noncommittal and utterly unconvincing shrug.

Quistis sighed. "Rinoa, I do have questions for you, but ... I think you should tell me whatever it is you don't want to say, first," she said, and then Rinoa did meet her eyes, and guiltily.

"I - I can't," the girl replied, awkwardly.

Quistis looked to the floor for a minute, gathering her thoughts - what's the best way to phrase this? - and then looked back up, reaching up to grasp Rinoa's free hand. "Look, Rin," she said, trying to sound as much like Rinoa's friend as possible, "I've come across some stuff about him on my mission. I can't tell you what it's about. But I can tell you that one of the things I need to know is your character judgement on Seifer. And look - I'm not supposed to even be talking about this, so we'll keep each other's secrets, okay?"

The young sorceress crouched down, until her head was lower than Quistis's; she then looked upwards, troubled brown eyes focusing on blue.

"Look, he came to see me," she said softly, actually looking over her shoulder to make sure no one else was in the room. "Seifer did. I was visiting Cara- my father," she corrected hastily. "The summer we were ... he used to sneak in ... just to talk. And I woke up one night and he was ... there."

Quistis's eyes narrowed. "What did he do? Why haven't you told anyone?"

Rinoa shook her head. "He just wanted to ... to talk. To make sure I was okay. To hear that everyone else was okay. To know that Edea had ... that Matron was ... okay. He doesn't even remember a lot of the stuff, and when he did, he ... wanted to check. He was ... nice," she said, the bland word speaking volumes in her soft tone.

She looked down at the sponge (Sponge? A small part of Quistis's mind noted in alarm) and then looked back up. "He said he was sorry," she said, with a small quirky smile that was all too sad on her face.

Quistis shook her head. "And then, two days later, you were almost kidnapped."

Rinoa nodded; having regained some of her spirits, she went back to lightly dabbing Quistis's face. "When he showed up, it reminded me of your warning, so I had Carawa- my father post guards."

Quistis let her eyes close momentarily in thought. Another paradox. Either Seifer had deliberately led Elsevier to Rinoa, or they had followed him unknowingly. Innocent or guilty? And how had he left the city anyway?

"Rinoa," she found herself asking, choosing her words carefully, "did Seifer seem - angry? Vengeful? Irrational, anything?"

She felt hair flicking against her arm in a way that told her Rinoa was shaking her head. "You know Seifer, he's always angry about something," Rinoa said thoughtfully. "But he seemed more - hurt." Again, the simple word had levels of meaning. "Something got pulled out of him during the whole ... thingey ... and I think he's just trying to pull himself back together."

"You don't think he'd actively do something against us, do you?" Quistis opened her eyes to see Rinoa coming in with some strange makeup tool that looked like a projectile weapon; she closed her eyes again. "Us in this case meaning SeeD, meaning Balamb Garden. I mean, I only knew him as a student, so..."

"No," Rinoa said, and she was so confident that Quistis flicked her eyes open to meet her gaze.

"Look," Rinoa said shyly, "it's like another ... Sorceress thing. Like when you were trying to explain what a Sensor was to me? It's like that, but with ... feelings, like, or truth, or something. Especially cause Seifer was ... one of ... our Knights."

Quistis couldn't help but shiver at the use of our and wonder what, in the dark of the night, Rinoa had to face alone.

The girl shook her head, pulling a smile back onto her face. "But no," she said. "You can kind of - feel it, I guess. He's not out to get anyone. If it had been five years, maybe, just cause he's so angry. But right now? Seifer's still in pieces."

Quistis filed this away under Information that will Not Hold Up in Court but is Good to Have Anyway. "Have you ever - have you ever seen him lie?"

Rinoa giggled. "Absolutely not," she said. "He wouldn't even lie when I wanted him to, when we were ... yeah. Not even then."

Quistis found herself relaxing. Rinoa's soft touch, as strange as it was, was kind of soothing. Quistis made a mental note to look into spas in the future as a SeeD relaxation technique.

Eventually Rinoa finished; the girl bound Quistis's hair high on her head in a Shiva-like ponytail, then began doing something almost massage-like which turned out to be (to Quistis's utter horror, once her eyes were open) dying streaks of her blonde hair a bright blue. Rinoa laughed and told her it was quite washable and she should lighten up for once.

Finally done, they stood in front of the mirror. Quistis looked over at Rinoa as the girl fastened on her little halo and wings: angel, obviously. Her own outfit - blue dress and high gloves and icy tinted lips and hair - had actually turned out looking much like the ice goddess herself might have looked, and Quistis smiled involuntarily.

She felt Shiva stir in her mind, having heard her name, and Quistis wondered if the GF could look into the mirror and see what she could see. Surprisingly, she felt Shiva's consciousness became a little more pronounced, inducing a slightly hazy, static-y feeling; unbalanced, one hand flew out to grasp the edge of her bathroom counter, and Quistis took a sharp breath.

Rinoa gasped beside her, and Quistis turned (dizzily) to the young Sorceress, whose eyes had opened wide.

A look of disbelief spread on Rinoa's face. "She - she's laughing at you," the girl said, her mouth slowly spreading into an amused smile.

Quistis turned back into the mirror, staring deliberately at the reflection, feeling Shiva rear up inside of her, almost like a Summon, one she could not quench -

Ice Queen.

The words were obviously aimed directly for her ears (or, more accurately, her inner ear) and move obviously tinged with humour. Quistis watched, astounded, as the air around her neck began to shimmer, and a delicate line of ice crystals formed like the strangest frost above her collarbone: an organic necklace.

"Wow," Rinoa said, reaching out and almost-touching it. "I can ... feel the spell," she whispered. "It's beautiful, Quistis."

Quistis was still a little nonplussed at having had (as far as she knew) the first ever pseudo-conversation with a Guardian Force that did not involve a Sorceress, a Sensor, or Source Magic of any kind. But then again, she and Shiva did have a special kind of bond, and it had certainly saved her life many times, not to mention the science-defying feats she had witnessed in Argun. She'd take whatever friendships she could get, she decided. As the ice summon faded back town to a slight tingle in the back of her mind, Quistis smiled into the mirror and watched as her icy blued lips smiled back.

Begin long author's note.

I know I haven't touched this in a long time. Here's a brief list of why: (1) dad had cancer (2) senior project (3) dad had surgery (4) finals (5) graduation (6) moving (7) new job (8) adjusting and taking the hell out of a break i sorely needed.

I do have plans to finish SLG, but it's mostly because (a) i have the end planned out and (b) i hate unfinished fic. Frankly I've lost interest in this sort of writing. I started this to teach myself to write "normal" fic about "normal" people (as normal as teen!killers are. By normal I mean it didn't have total bizarre magic and unicorns in it), and I learned a lot about doing that, but frankly what I learned most is that I really like the creativity aspect. Having these dictated plot notes over here on my computer was a big step for me but it's taken a lot of the fun out of things.

I've recently begun dabbling in FF7 again. Soon I hope to dabble in FFX as well. I also hope to return to FF8, because I have what I consider to be a totally rockin' wonky plot twist, but I will need to take a break after I finish SLG. I'm not begging for reviews - it has nothing to do with the response to this story, which has been overly pleasant; it has everything to do with my (questionable) mental state and current preferences.

So, in fin, I talk too much, and (I guess) if you ever had an inspiring (or blatantly flattering) review up your butt, now's the time to pull it out. XD

- sev