Hello and welcome to the next chapter of this fanfic! Yaaaaaay!

...I gotta stop eating chocolate.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this fanfiction. I do own this fanfiction though, but not anything mentioned in it.

Now sit back, read and review please!

Notice: In the real Chrno Crusade anime, they did something different with Chrno's past. This chapter is pretty much about Chrno's past but parodified. Well it isn't really parodied, since there wasn't any evidence that they robbed a bank...

Why am I telling you this when you can just read this?

XD Tee hee hee.

Chrno and the Cookie Factory

Once upon a time, there was a little demon named Chrno. He had purple hair and was a nice person.

"OOooooohhhh! Lookies here!" screamed Chrno.

Chrno used to be friends with this other demon named Aion and 5 other demons too, but then this pretty pretty light from the sky hit Chrno and made him all...er...'stupid'. But thats not until he gets hit by a brick wall. Later.

One day, Chrno decided to rob a bank with his friends, even though banks didn't exist back in the 1900's. The demons (which were Aion, Chrno, Rizel, Genai, etc etc) stole everything and ran the heck outta there when the British police came. These British police didn't have guns but they would hit you with their nightsticks if you commited a crime.

"Oh no! It's the evil Britishes!" yelled Aion. "They have come to tax us! RUUUUUUUN!"

So the demons ran the heck outta there and into an alley when a brick wall fell onto Chrno. That's when he had brain damage and taken to Demon Hospital USA in New York. Fortunatelly, the damage he had was not life threatening. Unfortunatelly, Chrno would have to be stupid for the rest of his life (a/n: no offense to anyone who is or knows a disabled...sorry).

This is how is was the first day Chrno regained concience in the hospital.

DAY 1

"I want pancakes!" Chrno screamed. He began to suck his pinky.

"No way." Rizel said back. "Doctor Billy Joe Bob Sue said that you shouldn't eat anything until you feel better."

"I want pancakes anyway!"

"...NO FREAKING WAY."

"I want pancakes!"

"...eep."

"Pancakes, pancakes, eat them with a fork! Pancakes, pancakes, eat them with a spoon!"

"...help?"

"Pancakes!"

"ALRIGHT ALREADY! I'LL GO DOWN TO IHOP AND GET YOU SOME FREAKING PANCAKES!" Rizel screamed. She then walked down across the street to Ihop, which sells pancakes, and ordered some pancakes. Unfortunatelly they were out of regular pancakes and all they had were caramel pancakes covered with whip cream and a strawberry. Rizel though it wasn't anything wrong and hoped that in buying the 48 cent pancakes would make the purpled-haired demon shut up. But when Rizel came back with the pancakes...

AFTER CHRNO EATING PANCAKES

(note that all the abused capital letters were on purpose)

"WHOOOOOOoooooOOOoooo! WHoooooOOooooOOOO! TEeeeeeeeEEEEEee HHHHeeeeeeeEEEeee! HHheeeeeeeEEeeeeE" Chrno screamed indistinctively.

I knew I should've went to Wal-Mart and bough pancake mix, though Rizel.

DAY 2

It was 7:36 A.M and Chrno was wide awake, playing some game on the computer at full volume.

Then it was 7:42 A.M and Chrno brushed his teeth with milk and cheese.

Then came 8:24 and Chrno played DDR (a.k.a Dance Dance Revolution) on heavy. He got a B.

Finally he woke up Aion and the others by singing "I Like Eggs" at full volume with a band of stick people (as in a rock band) called "The Stick People".

"ALRIGHT ALREADY I'M UP!" screamed Aion, "NOW SHADDAUP AND GET YOUR CORN FLAKES!"

"Yaaaaaaaaaay! Corn Flakes!" shouted Chrno. Then the purple-haired demon began to...slam his face on the wall like an idiot.

"You dumbass!" Shader screamed, wiping off the paint dust on Chrno's face. "We're still paying rent in this hospital! Ugh! Why couldn't you been not stupid?"

"Hmmmmm...I dont knowwwwww!" Chrno said in a child-like voice.

DAY 3

Everyone was trying to think of a way to get out of the hospital without paying rent (the hospital was sort of life a boarding house thing) when...

"HA! Thats it!" Genai exclaimed as he pointed to the ceiling and stood one foot on a chair, the other on the ground as if he was doing that one disco move. Everyone except Chrno looked at him as if he was wearing a huge pink tutu that actually fitted on him. Chrno, on the other hand, was staring at the sun, who he "though was shiny and wanted it."

"We'll go to town and rob a bank! That way, we can pay rent here, then move in to another place! It's genius!" Genai said.

Apparently, no one told Genai that there weren't any banks in a walk's distance and all the cars worked like crap right now.

2 HOURS LATER DOWNTOWN

"Dammit! There are no banks in this freaking city!" Genai said. He slammed his fist at the sidewalk.

"Duuuuude, stop punching sidewalks like you did with the last 38 streets and chill," Aion said as he put a hand on his fellow friend's shoulder. What a Kodak moment.

"Ah!" Chrno exclaimed. He pointed to a building across the street.

"What?" asked everyone.

"Ah!"

"What?"

"AH!"

"What? Little Timmy is stuck in the well?"

"AHHHH!" Chrno exclaimed louder, pointing at a cookie store with a sign that read "The Cookie Factory - Only the best!" on it.

Everyone shrugged. No harm done to a cookie store right?

Wrong. Well...maybe. Maybe not.

As soon as everyone walked in, Aion gasps. There were about 5 people standing near the counter. Aion sneered at them. They were obviously...

"The Evil Villans in Lemons," Aion said.

Rizel, Genai, and Shader all stared at him. "The what?" they all asked.

"Well well, if it isn't Roberto 'Aion' Bob-Joe," laughed the leader of the 'Evil Villans in Lemons'(aka EVIL), Bob Willsueyou, who was wearing a red jacket, buckled up with black pants and dyed red hair. Remember the chapter where everyone went to the arcade place? Yea..that's the Bob I'm talking about.

"What the hell?" asked Genai.

Bob then went into some weird battle stance. "You are a POKOMON master! I must challenge you!" (a/n: yes i spelled it correctly. just didn't take 'pokemon' cause i felt like it, and fear of copyrightness)

Aion blinked. "Hah! Give it up, bitch! You're out numbered!" He walked to the side to reveal himself, Rizel, Genai, Shader, and Chrno.

Bob snorted. "Wrong, bitch!" He also sidestepped to reveal his 'awesome' team, himself, a girl with green pigtails, a monk named Monk, a can of beer, and some kid named Billy with an afro.

"Hyaaaaaaaahhh! Go! GreenTea!" Bob shouted. He then proceeded to open his jacket to throw a plastic square pokoball on the ground. (a/n: you know those pokemon ball things they used to sell in Burger King back like in 2003 or so? thats what I mean).

The pokoball exploded and revealed a small little creature that resembled a water bottle. Only with mouth and eyes.

"GreenTea!" it said.

"What the hell?" asked Genai.

"Fine. I accept your challenge!" Aion said, "Go CheeseDude!" Aion then searched somewhere around his belt and also threw a square pokoball. The pokoball exploded, too. Out came something that resembled...a box! Only with eyes, mouth, and arms.

"Cheeeeese!" The thing said.

"What the frick?" asked Genai.

"Hah. What weaklings!" Monk said. "I shall defeat you all with my pinky!" He sticked out his pinky and everyone fainted. Even Monk, well...except for Chrno and Bob.

"Hahahahahahahaa-coughcough...bwwahahahahah!" Bob yelled through the dead corpses. "I shall defeat you here and now, weenie! GreenTea! GO!"

"GreenTea..."

"What? NO! I dont freaking care if your hungry! Fight now, bitch!"

Chrno yawned. "This is kinda boring. Let's make is funner! Hot-Dog!"

"What!"

Unfortunatelly, it came too late. Chrno had somehow already got his hands on a pokoball and it blew up to reveal...a hotdog. With eyes.

The hotdog then shooted lasers out of its eyes and killed GreenTea.

"What the hell!" asked Bob.

"You don't understand..."Chrno said. "The hotdog shoots lasers out of its eyes."

"Fah Wah Lah Lah Lah!" said the Hot-Dog.

"The hell with that! I know!" Bob said. "Fine! I admit defeat!" He kneeled down to retrieve the remains of GreenTea when a foot stomped on his back.

"AAAAAAHHH! MY BACK! MY PRECIOUS BACK! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" Bob said. "ALL I COME WAS TO AVENGE MY COMRADE, BILL, BUT NOOOOOOOO EVERYONE HAS TO GO AND BE PSYCHO B--" Bob passed out before even finishing his sentence.

"Bwahahahahahaha!" Aion evily laughed. He patted Chrno on the shoulder who was...hugging Hot-Dog.

Aion looked at Chrno, then at Hot-Dog, then at Rizel, and back to Hot-Dog and Chrno.

What another Kodak moment.

Then Chrno ate Hot-Dog, just for the hell of it.

Hey, Hot-Dog tasted just like a hotdog.

"FAH WAH LAH LAH LAH LAH LAH LAH LAAAAAAHHHH!" The Hotdog-like creature screamed.

While Aion, Bob, Genai and Rizel were trying to get the half-eated Hot-Dog out of Chrno's mouth, Shader nodded her head in disagreement.

When they were unable to retrieve Hot-Dog, Chrno ate the rest of him. Then, the day that Chrno met Mary Magdalene, Hot-Dog was reincarnated to Hot-Dog 2, which was in a human form with 4 arms.

Then Hot-Dog 2 bitch-slapped Chrno for good measures.

Poor Chrno.

THE END

Yup. Another chapter made...and delayed. Ah...(slumps back in chair) this author is a big slacker. I feel so unaccomplished since the last chapter didn't have much review and it wasn't that good.

Moo...just read and review...pretty please?

...Buttered Chicken anyone?