Chapter 16: The Recovery and the Kiss
A/N: Oh, yes, finally a kiss!
Karina was bored. And not just the normal, twiddle-the-thumbs-for-entertainment kind of bored. She was at the point of extreme-anger-with-the-entire-world-and-wishing-for-pain-rather-than-this-kind-of-agonizing-monotony kind of bored. She had been in the damn hospital for three days. Three frickin' days! She'd hardly had any internal injuries at all other than a cracked rib which was healing remarkably well. And the burns on her back were recovering quickly with the salve that was applied every few hours. She was lucky—she probably wouldn't scar at all.
But in her opinion, she would heal just as well in her own room or doing light training with the Slayers as here! Better, even, since she wouldn't have occasional urges to throw scalpels at the doctors who were trying to help her.
The Dragonslayers had come to visit her, of course, and had brought their entertainment and jolly good humor with them. But they were soldiers and had duties to attend to, duties which unfortunately didn't include smuggling her out of the room and taking her with them.
Folken had also visited her several times, gliding in like a phantom in his long, dark cloak and sitting on the edge of her bed. They had talked for awhile, and she remembered the moments fondly; she had almost forgotten how pleasing it was just to talk to him instead of learning to barge into people's minds and take their secrets away. He had held her hand the whole time, gently running his thumb along the creases in her palm and over her fingers, as if trying to memorize the shape. It had brought the familiar shiver to her spine, and the pleasurable racing of her heart.
The one person who hadn't come to see her since her return to the Vione was Dilandau. Not that she was surprised. He had stayed with her for the entire hour that it had taken the cruiser to get back, sitting with her in relative silence, speaking occasionally. Mostly he had simply sat by her bedside and looked into the darkness of the room, a slight frown between his brows as he absently twisted his hands, the one crimson gloved, the other bare. She couldn't expect him to want to be around her anymore when he had spent so much time with her already.
Strange that the fact that he didn't want to be around her didn't make her happy.
A blond head poked itself around the corner of her door, and Shesta grinned at her from behind the wooden frame.
Can I come in? he asked politely.
Karina breathed a sigh of relief. Somebody was here to save her from this hell. Thank god.
Of course, Shesta. He had quickly become one of her favorites of the Slayers, his quiet observations never failing to make her laugh.
I had wondered how you were feeling, and also I have a message from the doctors. The last was said with slight hesitance; everybody on the fortress knew how much she detested them.
What is it?You can be removed tomorrow, instead of in three days like they had previously thought. I think Folken spoke to them. He frowned as he said this and opened his mouth again like he was going to say something, but closed it again, obviously deciding against it.
Karina grinned at him. This day just keeps getting better and better.
Shesta glanced up at her through his blond lashes and opened his mouth, trying to decide whether or not to voice his thoughts. I believe Dilandau-sama wishes to visit you today as well. he said finally.
Her eyes flicked up and she saw that he was looking intently at her, searching her for a reaction. For some reason unbeknownst to her she felt her heart tighten, and she saw a tiny smile cross the innocent Slayer's face. Damn him for his observance.
she said as she adjusted the blankets around her legs, trying to sound nonchalant.
Well, I think he does. That doesn't mean he'll come. He can be very stubborn that way.
Karina laughed; she knew that only too well. He doesn't have to come and visit me. Nobody should make him.It's not us he's being stubborn with. It's himself.Could you be more vague? she asked sarcastically.
I could be more clear, but neither you nor he would listen to me, he muttered.
What the hell is that supposed to mean? she demanded, sitting up a little straighter and then wincing at the pain it brought to her back.
he said, a little too innocently for her comfort. Um, Karina, he hesitated and bit his lip, another frown creasing his brows, when you feel better, tomorrow when you can go to your own room, Folken wishes you to—to come and see him. An escort will be sent for you when you decide you want to come. Shesta's eyes were downcast, the innocence of his face hidden by his lashes and the slight shadows in the room.
Why would I need an escort? I've been to the throne room plenty of times before. Does he think I'll get lost? she added with an amused smile. The thought of his concern for her brought a slight smile to her face.
The request wasn't for you to come to the throne room. Shesta hesitated once more, and then blurted, it's for his chambers. He says that he's quite busy at the moment and his private office is in his rooms.
Karina felt the hint of a blush on her cheeks and glanced up at him, embarrassment in her eyes.
There was silence in the room for a moment, Shesta sitting next to her and looking with a troubled expression at the wall, and Karina with her eyes fixed on the blankets that covered her legs, wondering why Folken would send for her now.
Shesta broke out suddenly.
Don't go.Why not? she laughed, curious as to why he was being so ridiculous about this whole thing.
Shesta moved closer to her and took one of her hands. I'm serious. Or, if you go, don't take one of his escorts, take one of us, and keep him in the room with you. Or better yet, take Dilandau.Why the hell would I want to do that? she snapped, unaccountably irritated at the mention of his name.
Because he won't let anything happen to you. You've sort of become a favorite of the Slayers, you know, and none of us want anything to happen to you. You're like the sister we never had, or that we don't remember, one of the two. And Dilandau is the most capable of making sure nothing at all will happen to you.Why this assumption that something's going to happen to me?
Shesta frowned, and for the first time since knowing him Karina thought that she saw a spark of anger in his expression.
I don't trust Folken. I—I know what happened to us, to Dalet, Miguel, Viole, Gatti. And I know it couldn't have been done without... outside help.
Karina blinked. We're not supposed to be here.I don't get it. You're not supposed to be on the Vione?Well, that too, but what I meant was—Am I interrupting? Dilandau's cold, low voice cut through the conversation like a knife. Karina snatched her hand out of Shesta's, oddly aware of the picture they must present, and watched the General for his next move. He was currently leaning against the frame, looking as relaxed as ever, but with a certain extra amount of danger in his eyes. His customary uniform was lacking; instead a loose, crimson button-up shirt hung gracefully on his broad shoulders, opened up several buttons at the throat. His legs were encased in loose black pants and black boots reaching his knees and his hair was unusually disheveled.
No, you aren't interrupting, Karina replied coolly.
Leisurely he pushed himself away from the frame of the door and sidled over to her bedside, sending Shesta a look that could have withered stone. Taking the hint, the younger man bowed and hurried out of the room, sending a last smile to the invalid. Dilandau and Karina were left in silence.
You seem to have recovered, she observed after a moment.
I wasn't injured badly, he brushed her concern off casually. He paused, and then added, You look like you feel better. He closed his mouth and frowned, annoyed with himself for showing any concern with her.
Karina felt a sudden surge of irritation and suppressed it quickly. Good god she was moody today. I do feel better. The burns are healing well.
He nodded and there was more silence. He was watching her, surveying her unabashedly as she tried hard not to meet his eyes. A disturbing warmth flooded her cheeks and some of her more vital organs as she glanced up at him; her eyes were locked with his and she thought vaguely how easy it would be to lose herself in those twin pools of blood.
I understand that you are in need of an escort, Dilandau said suddenly, breaking the spell. His cheeks held a tinge of color, but his voice was steady.
she replied hesitantly, unsure why he chose to mention it now.
Lord Folken has requested you to come to his chambers. It wasn't a question, it was a statement, and there was something in his voice which worried her.
Yes, he has.
Dilandau searched her face for a moment and then spoke again, turning his eyes to the far wall as he did so. Do you trust him?Do I what?Do you trust him? he asked again, still focused on the whitewashed wall.
Karina opened her mouth to affirm that she did, the word was on the tip her tongue, and she let out, Startled at her own admission she shut her mouth, glancing up at the General again.
he asked bluntly. There was nothing in his voice to suggest what he was thinking; his eyes were closed from her, distant.
She shook her head. I don't know, she said honestly. There's something—something in the way that speaks, in the way that he looks at me, even when he's looking at me with—with lust, that, I don't know, seems malevolent, I guess.You mistrust him and yet you are his lover still? The question held the same tone as the last, casual, indifferent even.
Excuse me? Karina demanded indignantly.
I asked why if you don't trust him you share his bed. he repeated, refusing to look at her.
I have never shared Folken's bed, and I wouldn't, not when I don't trust him. I've never shared my bed with anybody except— Karina broke off abruptly and looked down at her blankets, biting her lip as embarrassment flooded her and the gnawing of past pain came back to her.
Dilandau gazed at her and clenched his fists, quelling the temptation to comfort her. It was ridiculous, absurd. He didn't need to comfort anybody. Who was he? he asked brutally.
She looked up at him, tears of anger and pain welling up in her eyes. She dashed them away furiously and said, her voice barely trembling, It's none of your goddamned business. But I guess if you really want to know, it was a man named Steven three years ago. I was sixteen, he was nice and older, so after awhile I slept with him. It turned out he liked pain, a lot. I only ever slept with him once, and after that he would find me and hurt me. He was a fucking sadist and it took me six months to escape him. That's who he was. You happy? she asked angrily, irritated with herself for having betrayed such a weakness and poured the whole thing out to him.
was his simple reply. Dilandau nodded his head to her and turned to leave. I have stayed too long. The Slayers need their training.All right, Karina said absently. He wasn't happy she had been hurt. He wasn't happy she had been tortured. What the hell was going on here? And when had he turned into a human?
I will escort you tomorrow to Folken's chambers, and I will stay with you while he says whatever he wants to say to you.Why are you and Shesta so protective when it comes to Folken?
Dilandau didn't reply. Instead he walked out the door and shut it softly behind him, leaving her to fume at his unresponsiveness. So Shesta's figured it out, he thought, a little sadly. I wonder when the rest of them will.
∞§∞
It was oddly comforting to have Dilandau walking beside her on the way to Folken's chambers, one of his pale hands resting casually on the hilt of his sword. He was dressed in armor once more today, and his appearance was formidable as he strode down the hallway. She was wearing her customary uniform as well, her hair in a tight braid down her back and her black coat buttoned up to her neck. Her gloves were in place as well, fastened snugly around her wrists with their silver buttons.
Neither of them had spoken a word since he had come to the infirmary that morning with her uniform in hand, and the silence was growing uncomfortable.
Karina said suddenly. What if Folken orders you to leave?
A strange expression came over his face and he ground out, Why the hell should I listen to him?He is your superior, she pointed out reasonably.
Maybe he was.From the history books I would say he was the only person you ever took orders from. she said conversationally, glancing up at him through her lashes to gauge his reaction.
He was.Why was? she probed.
It's been years since I've trusted him.Why don't you?It's none of your business.You asked me, she said fairly.
It was your choice to answer.Like you would have let me alone if I hadn't.
She was right. God he hated it when she was right.
He frowned, a thought suddenly occurring to him. You haven't been reading my mind, have you, Telepath?I thought we had progressed to my actual name, and no, I haven't. You would have felt it for one thing. I've only been in that twisted head of your once, and that was purely accidental.Let's keep it at once, then. You're in my head enough already.
I said let's keep it at once.Not that, she shook her head. The other thing.I didn't say anything else.
She searched his face. You aren't lying.You sound disappointed. No, I'm not.Then I'm hallucinating.Strangely enough, he remarked sarcastically, that doesn't shock me.Shut up. she snapped irritably.
Dilandau's eyes narrowed. What did you say to me?
Karina looked up at him, a smirk remarkably akin to his own playing about her lips. I told you to shut up. And if you think I'm going to quiver in my boots, you're wrong. I'm not afraid of you, Dilandau, not anymore.
In less time than it took her to blink he had gripped her shoulders and shoved her up against the wall, eliciting a gasp and a curse from her. His grasp was strong but not painful, his face close to her own.
Are you afraid of me now, Karina? he whispered, almost huskily. His eyes were on her grey ones, the length of his body pressed against hers.
she replied defiantly. Her voice trembled slightly, but not with fear.
he demanded, not releasing her. I wanted to kill you, I hit you, taunted you, hated you, took every opportunity to insult you, I even put that scar on your throat... he trailed off, tracing the mark gently with his finger. So why?
She shook her head, shrugging. I don't know. Something about saving a person's life changes the fear factor.I know I owe you a life debt, you don't have to remind me. she continued, as if he hadn't spoken, the Dragonslayers told me a bit about your—about your past, and I guess I sort of understand.
He raised an eyebrow. You've been created almost from scratch and endured weekly torture for the first years of your life?No. But I know what it's like to be alone, and to be apart from people. And I know a little something about torture.I don't want your pity, he told her firmly. I don't need your pity.I wouldn't pity you if you asked me to. she replied without heat.
A few seconds went by and Karina rolled her eyes. Are you planning on letting me go any time soon? I have a place to be.
It was his turn to smirk. Maybe I don't want to let you go.Somebody will come looking for me eventually. You can't hold me here all day.No, I can't. You heartbeat's sped up. he observed. I wonder why that is. Out of fear, maybe?Yours has sped up too. She could feel it thumping against her chest through his armor and her uniform. Does that mean you're afraid?I don't fear you, he said scornfully.
Do you fear anything? she asked curiously.
Then why is your heart beating so fast?
Dilandau said nothing. His eyes flicked to her lips and then back to her eyes, which widened as she realized his intention. He was so close to her, his parted lips centimeters from her own.
she whispered in question.
The sudden sound of a door opening echoed through the corridor and they broke apart. She was cold now that he wasn't pressed against her, her lips were untouched by his, and her mind whirled with the conversation—and result—of the past few minutes. Had he really been going to— and more importantly, had she really been going to let him—?
Karina, how pleasant to see you. Folken's voice cut through her thoughts and she turned, facing the man who usually caused the birth of butterflies in her stomach. She felt a sudden surge of anger at the sight of him and shook her head—where were all these ridiculous feelings coming from? She didn't trust the Strategos, but she didn't hate him by any means.
Hello, Folken, she said nervously.
Why don't you come inside? he beckoned gently, holding his metal arm out to her. He looked at Dilandau and, as if only just noticing his presence, said, And the General can return to his Slayers.I have no intention of leaving, Dilandau snapped savagely.
You may wait outside if you wish, but you may be waiting quite awhile. He sent a caressing look at Karina and she turned away, her eyes lighting on the General. There was such an expression of fury on his face that she wondered if he would attack the Strategos.
she said softly in warning. There's no need for him to get into trouble on my account, she thought, smiling inwardly at the fact that she was looking out for the man who only three months ago had wanted to kill her and torture her in all manner of ways.
He turned to her, looking into her eyes before taking his leave. In his eyes was something she was certain she had never seen before and would never see again—pain, pain that somehow, inexplicably, she had caused.
Now that that particular nuisance has been removed, Folken said softly as Dilandau's boots padded gently down the corridor. After you, Karina. He gestured with an elegant hand to the open door of his chambers, smiling at her a warm smile that made her blush. How did he do that to her? What was it about his flattering smile that made her feel like he was undressing her with his eyes?
Karina stepped into the room and gaped. It was even more extravagantly furnished than her room—a king four-poster with a canopy stood in the center of the room, a pair of french doors that clearly led out onto a balcony, an entire section of the enormous room devoted to a deep armchair and coffee table. Two doors led out of the room, one which stood ajar was the bathroom, the other, which was closed, she assumed to be his private offices.
She turned at the sound of her name and was once again given a reason to stare. Folken had taken off his cloak and was standing in a snug, sleeveless shirt, one that emphasized every movement of the muscles in his real arm and torso.
she managed once she had snapped herself back to reality.
I suppose you must be wondering why I've asked you here today. he began in his low, seductive voice.
I was a bit. she agreed, twiddling her thumbs behind her back in her nervousness. I was wondering to myself, hmm, I can't think why I would be going to his rooms instead of the throne room and then I realized that you had private offices in your rooms, and... she trailed off as he let out a quiet chuckle, stepping a few feet closer to her.
Why don't you sit down? he suggested. I'm sure I have something for you to drink if you're thirsty.Actually I'm pretty good. I've been sitting for quite awhile in the hospital and I'm feeling so much better I'd rather stand. And I'm not really thirsty. She was babbling, out of nervousness and out of something else that was tightening the pit of her stomach into knots. Her cheeks were delicately flushed as well—he disconcerted her—so at least she knew what to attribute the stomach flutters to.
You're charming when you're nervous. he said playfully. Then, more seriously, There was a reason that I invited you here today, and it was to discuss your reading of the prisoner.The Queen of Fanelia? Hitomi Kanzaki? She met his eyes with a challenging look, momentarily forgetting her nervousness.
Yes, Dilandau has told me little to nothing about that expedition of yours, and I wanted to know more about it. But also, he paused, as if contemplating what to say next, there was another reason.Another reason? Karina repeated, her brain freezing like a deer in the headlights.
Yes, another reason. He was moving closer to her, his light eyes on hers. Instinctively she backed up, slowly taking steps back until the back of her knees bumped the bed.
And what might that be? she asked innocently, her heart pounding in her chest in a way that she didn't think was romantic anticipation.
I think you already know. His metal hand came up to caress her cheek, the other he placed gently on her waist, and she took a sharp intake of breath. I've been waiting for this for a long time, he whispered in her ear, and brought his mouth down to hers.
As kisses went, it was certainly one of the better she'd had. It was gentle at first, soft and pressing, and then more passionate as she responded. God only knew why she responded, but she suddenly she was no longer kissing Folken in her mind's eye, and when she opened her eyes she was startled to realize that the eyes looking into her own were not crimson, but in fact a light garnet that she distrusted.
She shook her head. Suddenly all she knew was that she couldn't be here. Every piece of her was screaming at her to get out, to run while she still could. Folken, I have to go.I'm sorry if you don't feel the same way I do, Karina, I simply wanted to let you know. He held her eyes again. I thought you felt the same way.I did—maybe, I don't know. Do? Did? Does it really matter? She held a hand to her head. I don't think it does. Especially when everything's all... bendy. The world was twisting before her, distorting the furniture in the room into hideous nightmarish shapes. What the hell have you done to me?Good night, Karina.
She held on to the post of the canopy, trying to keep herself up right, commanding her legs to make run for the door, but she wasn't moving, nothing was responding to her commands. What did you do? she demanded again, gasping with the effort it took to get so few words out.
He smiled slightly. A kiss can be deadly if you mean it. Don't you fret now, Karina, I haven't killed you.
She could feel consciousness slipping away from her, and she grasped at it even as it slid through her fingertips.
Son of a bitch—
In the training room Dilandau looked up, aware of the fact that the bizarre sensations he'd had a minute ago had stopped. He could have sworn that he had felt ill only a moment ago, whoozy. And now it had stopped. And so had something else, something was missing, something was wrong, but as he looked around the room, he could neither answer the question what it was or how he knew.
A/N: So the line about the kiss was from Batman the Movie, the one with Michael Keaton, but it seemed to fit so perfectly. So, what did you think? Reviews are uber appreciated, so review for me. Please. Pretty please.