Holding On and Letting Go

"I just don't want to look away," Liz murmured as Tom stepped out of the small bathroom, towling off his hair from the shower. She was standing over the crib in the corner, her expression soft and happy, a complete turnaround from the shouting match they had the night before. She had her daughter back, and while that didn't mean all was forgiven when it came to Tom slipping around her to go in against her wishes and going after Agnes alone, it certainly put them on the right track to it.

He felt a smile tug the corner of his lips. "She asleep?"

"Yeah," she sighed and turned to look at him, her eyes narrowing just a little as her gaze zeroed in on a bandage covering a gash left behind by a bullet that had found an opening in his vest earlier that evening. "You okay?"

Tom glanced down. "Oh yeah. It's fine. Barely caught me."

His wife snorted and he moved towards the bed where a fresh t-shirt was left for him. He winced as he slipped it over his head and shoulders, his muscles already aching a little, and he thought about just how much he'd put himself through physically over a very short stretch. No wonder his body was trying to tell him enough was enough. "So, uh, should I make a pallet tonight?"

"Are you asking me if you're sleeping on the equivalent of the couch?" Liz asked, a little humour showing in her eyes.

"I'm well aware how deep in trouble I am," Tom answered quietly.

She hummed softly and moved towards him. Liz was already dressed for bed, her hair hanging loose on her shoulders, and Tom found himself staring as she moved closer. She reached out, her hands trailing lightly over scrapes and bruises that had accumulated over the last several days, and finally stopped when they reached his hands. Hers fit perfectly, his fingers lacing through hers, and Liz stepped a little closer. Tom remained still, following her lead, but leaned in so that his forehead was leaning against hers as they stood silently together and he could almost feel her weighing her words before she spoke them.

"I didn't think it was possible to be so angry at you and so relieved at the same time. Do you realize how badly that could have gone?"

Tom loosed a breath, feeling her grip on his hands tighten a little. "I had to try something. If there was any chance to save you both, I was going to take it. I had to try."

"I'm still angry."

"I know." He sighed and closed his eyes. "I'm not going to ask you not to be angry, just that you try to see it from my perspective? You were going to give yourself up to him, Lizzie. I thought I was about to lose you both, and I can't…. I won't ever let that happen. You and Agnes are my whole world."

She tried for a glare, but if he knew her tells at all, it looked like relief was winning out in her internal struggle. "We're better working together anyway," she said at last. "Just… I don't want to do this without you either, Tom. I won't."

He offered a small smile. "We're in this together. For better or worse."

"Come on. I think we might actually get the first decent night's sleep we've had in a while."

It was an invitation, a pass that said she wasn't going to put him on the floor that night, and while he was relieved to hear it, he only managed a chuckle.

"What?" she asked curiously.

"It's cute that you think we're getting a any sleep tonight."

Her brows drew together and he grinned, squeezing her hands before moving to switch the light off. She crawled into the narrow bed first and he followed, pulling the sheets up around them and he could feel her cool feet against his legs as she inched closer. He wrapped an arm around her. "Agnes was in the hospital for a week after she was born, but the first night they let me spend in there with her I was up all night. Every couple, three hours she would wake up and start wailing."

"Hungry?"

"Yeah, sometimes. And fussy and everything else. Our kid has a set of lungs."

Liz snorted a laugh. "How bad did you panic the first time?"

"Uh.."

"Uh-huh," she teased and wrapped an arm around him. "I'm now picturing you in full panic mode, I hope you know."

"Yeah, it was pretty close. I swear those nurses wouldn't leave her alone when she was happy and sleeping, but the second I didn't know exactly what to do, not a nurse in sight."

Liz choked on a laugh. "You're a quick learner. I'm sure you did great. And will do great."

"We both will," Tom promised as he nestled down, holding her close. He felt her relax against him, easing the tension from him as well. They weren't done. Kirk was still out there, and he knew that the tough calls still needed to be made now that they had Agnes. While he might be inclined to permanently ensure Kirk could never hurt them again, Liz would still want answers, and dead men weren't overly chatty. They would just have to deal with it as it came.

A small sound came from the crib and Tom held his breath, waiting, until he heard their daughter start to cry. He chuckled and sat up, easing his legs over the side of the bed. "Who needs sleep anyway?"

"You want me to get her?"

"I got her." He could feel Liz's gaze follow him in the dark as he padded over to the crib and leaned over to scoop Agnes up. She quieted after a moment as he bounced her, her gaze fixed on him and he felt a sense of peace sweep through him.

"You are good at that," his wife murmured softly, suddenly behind him. He hadn't heard her get up, but she leaned a little on his a and smiled down at Agnes. "Guess we'll have to keep him around, huh, sweetheart?"

Agnes cooed happily and Tom broke out into a grin. "Love you," he whispered. "Both of you."

Liz turned and pressed a kiss against his shoulder. "Love you both too. Even when you do things like nearly get yourself killed."

"Not going to let go anytime soon, are you?" he teased.

She looped her arm through his, careful not to jolt the little girl edging back towards sleep there. "No," she said softly, "I'm not letting go of you any time soon."

Notes: I wanted to get this written in case my predictions are entirely off for tomorrow night's episode, then at least I've got this wish and want. My current prediction stands that Liz will try to give herself up to Kirk (in exchange for Agnes), and Tom will go in to try to save her against Liz's wishes. I just hope he succeeds. That would be amazing. Red can take down Kirk, let Tom save his daughter.