edited Dec. 2022
On the fifteenth floor of the Ministry was the Magical Permits and Licenses department. It was there you could receive a license for Apparition and selling of magical artifacts or permits for magical home addition in a muggle neighborhood or a new fireplace to integrate into the Floo Network.
At the end of the hallway with brown walls and intercompany owls dodging overhead there was a small cubical with the name "Hector Shortbook" etched into a plate that sat on his desk. He was a short, portly man with a terrible toupee and seemed to be sweating more than usual as the couple sat adjacent to him at his desk.
Hector Shortbook took out a handkerchief from the inside of his jacket pocket and wiped his forehead of the small beads starting to pool above his brow. He was having a hard time looking either one of them in the eye from the time they sat down for their business. He had heard them; he was just stalling.
"Excuse me?" he asked again, for the third time.
Sirius rolled his eyes that he was going to have to say it again. He, Hermione and Remus sat in three very uncomfortable chairs with someone who was governing the rules of the new law that was to take effect in four days. Sirius had explained, quite clearly and two times prior, that he was there to obtain a license to marry Hermione Granger. The portly man had practically choked.
"But… but you can't marry her!" he said in a somewhat hushed tone, as if they even being together, was a scandal.
"Why not?" Sirius asked uninterested and picking a lint string off his perfectly pressed pants. He was already mentally exhausted from this whole ordeal and having to explain himself for the third time was beginning to irritate him.
Shortbook cleared his throat, "Well, to start, the Ministry is about to endorse a law on July 28- "
"Yes, yes, enslaving the Muggle-borns to marry Pure-bloods, we know." Sirius announced in a non-indoor voice.
"It's not enslavement, Sirius!" the portly, anxious man corrected.
"It's Mr. Black," Sirius said, returning the correction, his fingers fluttering in the air pompously. Being the last surviving Black had its reputation and he was set on changing it while using it to his own advantage.
Hermione sat stiff and rigid in her seat. Her back not even touching the seatback, with her hands folded on her lap. Compared to Sirius's laid-back appearance looking like he "just stepped off his broom" with his tousled hair, she was the perfect statue. She was felt all eyes were on them, studying their movements carefully to see through their phony performance. From the second she passed through the doors of the department, heads turned, and whispers began to erupt while she walked arm in arm with Sirius. Their insider informed Kingsley that Hermione Granger's name had passed over several tongues on what a high mark she would be to petition for. She was closest to the Boy-who-lived, she was a key player in the take down of Voldemort and was responsible for many family members currently incarcerated in Azkaban. To several, she was a "marked woman" to be petitioned for.
"Mr. Black," Shortbook corrected. "You are the very last of the oldest line of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black and I might advise you to reconsider due to your rare bloodline."
"Not a chance," Sirius teased, elated he would stop the Pure-blood mania.
"In four days, the Muggle-born female community will be paired with practical mates of other Pure-blood ancestry to ensure a stronger growth in the magical population. Muggle-borns will be well taken care of and I'm sure you would appreciate-"
"I don't appreciate any of it! It's a ridiculous law put in place by a bunch of controlling power-hungry fossils with antiquated opinions. I've also noticed you have not looked my fiancé in the eye, since she's sat down."
Sirius glanced over to Hermione and noticed she was practically trembling. He couldn't help but feel sorry for the girl; Hermione had worked herself into a silent panicked state. The two didn't exactly get along and in the past, their voices always rang loudest throughout the room at Order meetings, but she was Harry's best friend, and it meant the world to all of them that she would remain safe. He had a duty; it wasn't a chore. He was devoted to the Order, and he committed to this mission, thus swearing to protect her. He was not thrilled with the idea he was to be celibate for an unknown time, but at least he wasn't going to be lonely. Hermione fought alongside him in the Order and this mission was to be no different.
Hermione hadn't noticed him looking at her. She remained straight-backed and proud, her hands fidgeting in her lap, her knee bouncing up and down nervously and chewing her lower lip absentmindedly. Something touched her and she glanced down to see Sirius's hand placed over her nervous one and he worked his way into holding it. She was met with the kindest grey eyes and a gentle squeeze once he acknowledged how anxious she was. It was such a small gesture from him, but the value was immeasurable.
For a moment, Hermione forgot where she was, or rather why she was where she was. Instead of worrying about who might discover them, she could only feel the comfort of Sirius's hand holding hers and the way he looked at her for that moment. He offered a small smirk and sealed it with a subtle wink for her.
We will get through this.
"My apologies, Miss Granger," he said with minimal enthusiasm. "It just seems to be a bit sudden; wouldn't you say? A little ill-timed?"
"No, not sudden at all." Sirius lied, suddenly finding it difficult to take his eyes off her. Despite their quandary, he wasn't above admitting she was a rather beautiful woman and he never ignored looking at a pretty witch. "Can you blame me?"
The Order had an inside informant that shared with Kingsley about bribes being made ahead of the law, to take the first placement for petition when July 28 rolled around. It was evident Hector Shortbook was also aware of the bribes for certain brides but wouldn't have guessed the one with the highest bounty would be seated across from him. Once he learned Granger wasn't a free woman and betrothed to Sirius Black, gave him pause. It was in his best financial interests to deter the pair from retaining a license to marry, knowing that he would benefit greatly from other petitioners, as well with his Superiors of the department. He eyed the two suspiciously, for no one had any intel that Hermione Granger was involved with anyone and certainly not with Black.
"Mr. Black, here at the Ministry, we are not taking marriages between Pure-bloods and Muggle-borns for granted, so may I ask why come into the Ministry, now?" Mr. Shortbook inquired, his quill at the ready to document anything that may have garnered a refusal for the license to marry.
"Well, learning about this new law they're hoping to enact, I didn't want to risk losing my witch to a lesser wizard," he charmed, squeezing her hand and trying to come across sincere to the Ministry official. "There's going to be a lot of competition out there for her hand and I just wanted to ensure I was the first, without hesitation."
"Are you insinuating that you are forcing this Muggle-born- "
"Hermione Granger, her name is Hermione Granger," Sirius asserted.
"He is not forcing me to marry him, but if he was, how is this any different than the law you're going to pass?" Hermione finally chirped in, finding strength with the way Sirius was gently rubbing his thumb over her fingers as he squeezed her hand.
"That particular law does not take effect for four more days and right now, we wish to ensure proper protocol until then, Miss Granger." Shortbook was already starting to feel the effects of the stress he was putting himself through. The nervous sweating man continued to write on, making notes about the two of them as they answered a few more small questions. Each time he asked, he glanced over his half-moon spectacles, hoping to catch them in a lie or well-rehearsed story, still doubting their union. He knew what he had riding on it, knowing how valuable Granger was.
Before Hermione could get another word in, Sirius leaned in closer to the administrator and added, "As I said, there will be several vying for her hand, and I would hate to lose her to a lesser handsome younger wizard. So, lets make sure we get this done, before that's even a factor."
"Yes, indeed, Mr. Black there are many petitioning, er- I mean, going to be petitioning for her hand, once the law does go into effect. However, any marriage between a Pure-blood and a Muggle-born will be heavily examined, even before the law follows through." He was quick to correct, but his slip did not fall on deaf ears. Remus, who had sat silent through the ordeal made a mental note to include this with Kingsley. "I feel you should know, Mr. Black, that several have come forward and have… expressed an interest in Miss Granger."
"I would imagine, she is… something, isn't she?" he charmed, giving a low convincing chuckle.
Pulling out a rag to pat his beading forehead, "Yes, sir. People in this department have been, to put it delicately, quite persuaded to take Miss Granger's charge, should she be petitioned." His voice quieted as he finished.
Sirius smirked, leaning in closer and speaking very slowly, as if sharing a secret between the two men. "Are you insinuating that my fiancé's hand is being promised to the highest bribe?"
Immediately, all the blood drained from Shortbook's face as he hushed him, "No, no! It's just that… that's what I've heard."
Sirius smirked and sat back in his seat, reaching into the inside pocket of his jacket. He pulled out a small envelope, albeit thick, and slid it on the administrator's desk and under some papers. "I'll tell you what, Shortbook, how about you make sure to ignore those petitions coming across your desk and we move this along swiftly. I don't believe any further word on it would be necessary." Hermione looked away, silently appalled by the transaction, but aware it was necessary. Sirius assured her his fortune was intended to go to "good fortune" and thought nothing of it, before they even entered the Ministry.
Mr. Shortbook shook his hands nervously, throwing additional papers over the envelope that wasn't that well hidden as he would have liked. "Right. So, how long have you two been courting?"
"Does anyone say that anymore?" Sirius asked, glancing to his best friend that sat quiet as a witness.
"Six months," Hermione added, replaying their scripted backstory in her head. "I'd had a crush on him for years and I finally built up the courage to- "
"She was quite persistent, the little minx," Sirius cooed, playing into the part well. "She was wearing this low cut- "
"Sirius," Remus hummed.
"Right, well, it's our story to tell, isn't it?" Sirius ran a hand over his stubbled beard in thought, watching the portly man write down every word they said.
"So, with all that's about to transpire, Miss Granger, are you prepared to become the wife of the most notorious Azkaban convict?" Mr. Shortbook inquired, resting his quill on the desk.
"He's not a convict, please stop insinuating that he is," she announced, causing a few heads to turn from nearby cubicles. She was already on edge, her nerves beyond shot and she felt tears threatening to escape.
Dipping and re-dipping his quill into the inkwell, Shortbook was doing his best to stall them, to read them, to test any cracks in their unity, despite the handsome amount of money Sirius just slid over his way. "Apologies, apologies, Miss Granger." He pulled out a form and dipped his quill into the ink. "Now, Miss Granger, how old are you?"
"Twenty-two," she said confidently.
"Mr. Black?"
"A very fit and healthy forty-three," he said, squeezing Hermione's hand gently.
"Upon your union, there will be several inspections to see this Pure-blood and Muggle-born marriage is well-suited, overall." Mr. Shortbook placed his quill down and addressed the two of them together, nervously adjusting his tie as he spoke. "Your newlywed period will fall under the new law put in place and you two will be subjected to the same as others. We will be making appointments with you, via owl, when it would be a good time to visit you at your home and inspect the premises."
"Is the Ministry afraid of Pure-bloods torturing their new brides?" Sirius balked, his foot falling from his knee with a loud thud.
Shortbook nervously adjusted some papers on his desk and continued, "We intend to make sure all marriages of this pairing are… genuine. Where is it, you'll be living?"
Sirius looked at Hermione and then to Remus. He swallowed hard, unsure about that minor detail, but Hermione prevailed, "We don't know, yet. We're currently flat hunting right now."
Damn, so close.
"All right, and how soon are you planning on having children?"
Hermione's eyes widened, unprepared for that direct question. She cleared her throat and adjusted her skirt, for the very idea of she and Sirius would be-
"Right away." Sirius quickly answered, hoping to unsettle the man. He offered a side smirk, after hearing Remus give a slight chuckle under his breath. "We're actually, already trying." The portly man looked up, swallowing at the tone of Sirius's voice. "I know it's not particularly proper to discuss the intimate details, but let it be known that we're shagging like rabbits." Sirius smiled, his eyes darkening in a most sinister manner.
Crossing and uncrossing her legs, Hermione leaned closer to Sirius and laid a hand on his chest, "Sirius, darling, I'm sure he gets the point."
Chuckling and winking at her, Sirius rested back in his seat, letting it appear she had tamed him for the moment, "I'm hoping he does. Just want to give him the visual."
"We all got the visual, Sirius," Remus said, clearing his throat.
"-sometimes, four times a day!" Sirius rambled on, finding the Ministry official's discomfort rather amusing. It pleased Sirius to see the man manifesting a glass of water with an unsteady hand and his wand slightly shaking.
"Remus, please rein him in," Hermione whispered, but her friend was of no help, finding the entire situation equally as humorous. He failed to muffle his own laughter, quite amused by the whole scene. "I swear, you two are like children." Mr. Shortbook took another big gulp from his water glass, afraid to make any eye contact with Mr. Exhibitionist.
The final forms had finally been filled out for the license to be granted. Mr. Shortbook failed to stall them any longer and it was with great trepidation he handed the finalized documents to Hermione's waiting hand. With an extra tug from his chubby fingers, she reminded him to let go by shoving the not-so-well-hidden bribe money towards him as a distraction
In a blur, the three of them vacated the offices and headed towards the elevators, with Hermione's heavy click-click of heeled shoes that echoing off the walls. Her nose was buried deep into the documents, reading every fine line meticulously. She nearly forgot about the two men trailing behind her as she knew her way without looking up, stepping right into the open elevator as the grate opened as if waiting for her.
A suited wizard fixing his hat glanced to Hermione, "What floor Miss Granger?"
Looking up at the sound of her name, she smiled pleasantly to the wizard at the controls, his finger poised over the buttons. "Good morning, Theo. First floor, atrium, please."
Sirius nudged Remus to the side, as they stood behind the young witch and whispered, "Does she know everyone?"
"Well, everyone knows her." Remus confirmed, sliding his hands into the pockets of his pants. "She's about as famous as you, here in the Ministry." He nudged his friend back in the same manner.
The elevator emptied out, Hermione still walking ahead of him going over the document. Sirius was the last one to exit the metal deathtrap and with a nod to the wizard at the buttons, he thanked the man. "Thank you, Theo!"
"Quite welcome, Mr. Black."
Remus chucked under his breath, "Told you."
Sirius walked confidently through the throes of people passing through the atrium. As he glanced up towards the building windows, a long portrait of Kingsley Shacklebolt slightly billowed, though it was tethered tight, calmy poised and sitting proud. He followed his friends in step, winding around the obnoxious water feature in the center and reached into his pocket for all his loose coin. As his hand slid back into his jacket pocket he looked up and met the eyes of a fit looking red-headed witch wearing sheer low-cut blouse and white slacks that accented the curves Merlin gave her. He offered her a smile as she passed, a lip bite returned to him, and he spun around in mid step as he continued to walk backwards away from her with their flirty exchange.
A painful slap on the back of the head righted him forward as his vision was disrupted with Remus glaring at him. "You're about to get married! Act like it."
"Oi! Sorry. Just habit, Moony," Sirius defended, shrugging his shoulders with the reminder his days were numbered. As they exited onto the public street, he glanced over Hermione's shoulder to peruse the document himself. "So, how long does it say before we tie the knot?"
"It says, we have one week," she replied, looking up to him as he was putting on sunglasses. With a proper celebratory yelp, he bid the two of them good-bye and started in the direction where he parked his motorbike.
Feeling one of the weights off her shoulder, she watched as Sirius walked away, carrying himself in such an arrogant manner, she wondered how she would tolerate his company. A hand rested on her arm, gently squeezing it with a support. Knowing their friendship had long since faded from teacher to mentor to friend, he felt no harm in pulling her in for a much-needed hug. "It'll be all right, Hermione. It's not forever."
She rested her head against this chest, comforted by the soft fabric of his suit jacket and his woodsy scent that always reminded her of a calm forest. Feeling his hand reach up and lay behind her head in a light scratch she closed her eyes, "I hope not, Remus. He's a handful."