Wowee, this one was really tough to write for whatever reason. Just one of those times where the words don't wanna come out. Either way, though, I'm really happy with it in the end. Hope everyone is staying safe, healthy, and sane. Enjoy!

o-o-o-o

"Alright, this should be the epicenter of the signature," Tails stated as he and Rotor came to a stop. They'd reached the sandy beach of a rather large lake, its calm waters ebbing and flowing in what would be a soothing scene, if not for the knowledge that not but a few miles westward lay a stronghold of one Ivo Robotnik.

"Oh, don't tell me," said Rotor, annoyance tugging at his words, "It's underwater, isn't it?"

Tails glanced at the radar on his communicator, then back up at the watery expanse in front of them, "Not likely," he responded, "The lake's large, but it's only 7 feet deep at its lowest. We'd be able to see the glow from here."

"Oh thank goodness," Rotor sighed, but perked up as something seemed to occur to him, "How do you know how deep the water is?"

Tails mentally scolded himself. He'd analyzed the water body's properties without even thinking about it, but he couldn't very well let Rotor know that his living computer of a brain apparently came with a built-in depth finder.

"Sonic and I came out here some years back, before Robotnik closed in on it," he lied, as usual. He'd never seen this lake before in his life, "We thought it might be a good place to fish."

If Rotor thought that suspicious, it didn't show. Instead he gazed thoughtfully at the placid water. The only disturbance on the surface was the small waves sloshing from the wind's gentle push. It was almost insulting to Tails. How dare this day have the nerve to be so gorgeous?

"Welp, guess it's obvious what we do here," Rotor said, glancing down at his wrist, "I'll take the west side, you take the east? Meet up on the opposite bank?"

Tails nodded, eyes surveying the treeline on the far shore. Half a mile as the crow flies; it wouldn't take very long.

"Right. Turn up the sensitivity on your radar," the fox instructed, "Search in a Z-pattern. If you start to lose the signature just double back to the bank. If neither of us find anything, it must be behind us."

"Onward and upward, then," said Rotor, then with a wink, "Just holler if you meet any trouble."

"You do the same," Tails said with a smirk. And with that, the two split off and began the search. For this first time since his world collapsed down around him two nights ago, Tails was alone with his thoughts. He didn't even need to check his communicator for the signature readings; he'd uploaded the functionality into his own software the night before, something that seemed like the prudent thing to do at the time, but was starting to seem less wise after his near slip-up just moments ago.

It was becoming clearer with each passing second how truly untenable this situation was. It had seemed like a good idea in the deadly silence of the server room, when he'd first seen himself for what he was - removing the inhibitors, some select obfuscations, fiddling around with his digital inner workings the way a clockmaker might calibrate a timepiece. He'd been in something of a fervor then, though, not really contemplating the gravity of what he was doing to himself. He was only consumed by panic at the realization that he was tethered to a madman, the same madman that created him.

But though he had succeeded on one front, he had, in certain ways, sabotaged himself on others. As ironic as it was, Tails wasn't used to being a robot. He wasn't used to having to hide his true nature - the subroutines had always done it for him, completely without his knowledge. Now, after his revelation and late-night coding frenzy, the android had opened an electronic can of worms that he was still trying to reign in. And from the response he'd gotten from Knuckles, it didn't seem like he was doing all that great of a job at it. He tried to tell himself that, in spite of all the difficulties it was causing, the modifications had been for the best.

But there were still so many questions, every last one of them horrifying. How much of his anatomy was functional, and how much was purely for show? How had he been aging the past few years, or would he age at all? Why a fox? Why two tails?

Can I really think, or is all this simply the sum of a mess of computing protocols?

Can I really feel?

There was the rabbit hole again, staring him directly in his face. He didn't know if he'd ever be ready to commit and dive in. How does one even confront something like that? A therapist? Oh hey, shrink, good to meet you! Anyway, a while back I found out that I'm a completely inorganic machine created by an insane scientist to murder people and overthrow the government; and my entire life and possibly the entirety of what makes me a person may be a total lie! Who knew, huh?

He just about missed it, lost in his own thoughts, when a stark golden glow revealed itself from within a grouping of cattails, not far from the bank of a small stream that fed into the lake. Mentally switching off the chaos energy detection program, he began the trudge through the soggy underbrush toward the emerald. He habitually kept a lookout for any snakes, but then realized cottonmouth venom probably wouldn't do much to harm his useless circulatory system.

He picked up the stone and admired the power emanating from it, similar to that of the Master Emerald, but intrinsically incomplete. It sang a song in waves of energy, calling out a plaint to its six brothers.

Tails raised his wrist and dialed Rotor's communicator, but stopped just short of sending the call. An idea began to germinate, one that was decidedly underhanded and would only further confound the web of lies he'd been casting these past few days. But if he was going to find out the necessary details of his nature, it seemed like his best shot.

He let his eyes drift through the willows to the north, beyond which, he knew, rested a relatively small but nevertheless well-armored Robotnik outpost. Its outer walls began just shy of three miles from the lake, and the android figured it would hardly take him any time at all to reach it, especially considering how quickly he'd found the emerald.

Tails reached into the bag he'd been carrying since the two had left the plane, and removed a small, metallic cube. With the press of a button, the cube expanded outward until it was only just small enough to hold in one hand, and the fox quickly placed the emerald within and sealed the container. Immediately, the outpouring of chaos energy ceased, trapped and subdued by the device, and Tails returned it to the underbrush, carefully covering it in any spare brambles and leaves he could find.

Tails examined his handiwork after a short time, done in much the same way the killer in a murder mystery novel might hide a body, and continued onward around the edge of the water. If he played it cool enough, this would work. All he needed was a few minutes away from Rotor to execute what needed to be done. Get in, get the data, get out, and "find" the emerald. Simple as that; Rotor would never know Tails took his little detour, they'd accomplish the mission, and the fox would have his answers.

That was it, then. The plan was set, at least in his mind, and it was a rather uneventful trip the rest of the way around the lake. Tails took care to measure his pace, agonizing as it was, to hopefully make it seem like he was still searching. Even still, he reached the halfway point a solid five minutes before he saw Rotor brushing away the thickets toward their meeting spot.

"There's the wonder kid!" the walrus greeted playfully, "Find anything in your neck of the woods?"

"Zilch," Tails responded, schooling his expression with all his might.

"Yep, no dice on my end either. Hope this whole chaos connection stuff that Knuckles fed us wasn't just a load of bunk."

Better cut off that train of thought, Tails figured. He didn't need Rotor coming up with reasons to leave, but then again, directing him toward the actual emerald's hiding spot was beyond out of the question. He could, however, send him as far away as possible within their current operation zone under the pretext of a wider search. Yeah, a goose chase would do nicely.

"How about you circle back behind the lake and check around the plane?" he offered, "I can keep looking through these woods and see if there's anything that sticks out."

"You sure? Robotnik's got his whole outfit set up just over that rise; I'd feel weird making you head that way on your own."

Tails waved him off, hoping his mannerisms conveyed an adequate amount of nonchalance, "It's all good. It's only an outpost anyway, it's not like he's got any major operations happening there. I'll keep well enough hidden."

Tails could see visible concern work its way into Rotor's brow, but he didn't move to vocalize his reservations. They'd been on so many missions now that there was a layer of intrinsic trust to all of their interactions - a comradery amongst fellows, one that Tails knew full well he was violating.

"10-4, bud. But we've got the comms; make sure to holler if something doesn't feel right."

Tails gave a quick, two-fingered salute. "Always do."

And with that, the pair parted ways once more. As soon as Tails was sure he was out of Rotor's line of sight, he darted toward the direction of the base, twirling his tails not only for the extra speed but also to avoid the increasingly thick and noisy swampland.

He wouldn't have a huge amount of time, maybe 20 minutes at best, before Rotor inevitably came back empty-handed and confused. It would be enough time, but it was far from comfortable, and the android knew that most of that window would have to be spent waiting for his moment to enter the facility in the first place. What he'd told Rotor about its relative lack of protection was true, it wasn't a particularly well-guarded or critical infrastructure point for Robotnik, but dutiful SWATbots still lingered around the grounds like red ants on a hill, and thus the potential for danger was very much present.

Once he was near the compound, close enough to see the tall chain link fence topped with barbed wire through the trees, he floated himself toward the top of one of the taller pines. Careful to keep himself concealed, Tails ran an analysis program as his eyes scanned the expanse of the outpost.

Twenty-five SWATbots, his systems told him, all ground-based. He could only see seven patrolling the outer edges of the campus, so the rest must be inside, and once he was closer, he might be able to sense where exactly in the facility they were. It was something he'd learned from the files: all Robotnik SWATbots had a cybernetic link for communication and coordination in battle, and since Tails himself was more or less a highly advanced and intricate SWATbot, he was no exception.

It disgusted him, to put it simply, to look at these hulking goliaths of steel and destruction and to realize that he was considered among their ranks, even if only in a technical sense. He'd smothered his own cybernetic signature the moment he found out about it, which wasn't too difficult since it was tied to his locator which had to go as well. Two birds, one stone. Not that it made it any easier to stomach, of course, but he was getting pretty good at blocking those kinds of things out.

Tails figured a relatively direct approach would earn him the best chance of success. He couldn't fly in, it would leave him far too exposed, but there was a section of the southern fenceline heavily draped in foliage, which would provide him enough coverage to work his way toward the main building and slip inside. He kept among the trees as he worked his way around, careful to avoid any branches that wouldn't support his weight, and flitted down to the ground near his entry point.

But as he began his climb over the fence to begin the infiltration, he became aware of two things simultaneously: one, a snapping of a stick behind him, and two - the most readily apparent - Rotor's voice emphatically whisper-yelling his name.

Tails whipped around to meet his partner's eyes, alarm and confusion plain to see within them. Tails figured his own expression looked much the same. The two gawked at each other for what seemed like hours, but could only have been a couple of seconds, before Tails broke the silence.

"I-I thought you were checking the other side of the lake."

"Well we weren't strapped for time, so I thought I'd come give you some backup first. Didn't realize you'd be hoppin' fences on me."

"Look, Rotor, I-"

"The hell are you thinkin', kid? You tell me you'll be fine over here and the second I turn my back you decide to roll on in, guns akimbo?"

"What's the big deal, Rotor?" Tails countered, "I was just going to run in and do some recon. It's a new base so we'll need info on it; we do this kind of thing all the time."

It was bullshit, and Rotor knew it. Tails knew that Rotor knew it.

The fox quickly realized his options for talking his way out of the situation were dwindling with each passing second. Rotor was becoming agitated and the fox in all honesty couldn't blame him one bit.

"Right, with days of planning, backup, and risk assessment. I don't think I've ever seen a team member try to dive into hostile territory with zero reinforcements. Plus you tried to send me off so I wouldn't even know what was going on, and I'd bet dollars to donuts Sally has no clue what you're up to! What is all this, Tails?"

"Okay okay okay, Rotor, listen," Tails interjected, "Look, you're upset, I would be too. But I just need to get in and out real quick. There's crucial data in Robotnik's network I need to get my hands on."

"What kind of data?"

"I can't tell you that, Rotor, just please trust me. There's a reason I didn't tell anyone; if too many people know about what's going on it could be extremely dangerous. People could die."

That seemed to strike a chord with Rotor, as Tails witnessed his expression fall from one of worry and irritation to one of pure terror.

"Seriously? What kinda shit did you get yourself in, bud?"

Tails crossed his arms and turned away from Rotor. How much did he really want to divulge to his teammate? He obviously couldn't just come out with everything, but he'd been caught red-handed. It wasn't as if he could just sweep everything under the rug like he'd somehow miraculously done with Knuckles.

Rotor's been my friend for years. I don't have to tell him everything, but he's earned the right to know at least part of what's going on.

"To be honest, I don't entirely know," Tails finally said, "That's part of the reason I need to get into that base. I swear I'll come clean to you and everyone else the second I can, but...but I just can't right now."

"Tails, if your life is in danger, I have to-"

"All our lives are in danger!"

If I even count as alive…

The thought came unbidden, and so quickly Tails didn't have time to stifle it. It felt like a stake driven through his mechanized heart, and he had to make a conscious effort not to physically wince. He had plenty to panic about as it was, he couldn't afford to fight an existential war at the same time, but it was always there, nagging at the back of his mind - no doubt a mangled cluster of 1's and 0's.

He must have betrayed his sudden apprehension, because Rotor immediately softened.

"Look bud, let's just find that emerald, we'll head back to HQ, and you and I can talk this whole thing over with Sally. We'll work everything out; there ain't no need for daring-do type antics."

"They're not antics, Rotor," Tails responded, his voice steely and determined, "This needs to be done, as soon as possible. I'm going in there, and there isn't anything you can do to stop me."

Rotor seemed pensive, but only for a moment, before his countenance resolved into one of equal certainty.

"Well if that's the case, then I'm going in there with you. We're a team after all. I can't let you do this by yourself."

Tails did a double take. Out of all the responses Rotor could have had, this was one he hadn't particularly counted on. Nevertheless, he didn't want his friend to have to shoulder any of this weight.

"No, I can't let you do that. Like you said, this is way against protocol, and you need plausible deniability. At least this way you can tell Sally you tried to stop me."

"I don't care about that, I care about you comin' out of there in one piece. We'll deal with Sal when this is all said and done. But if what's in there is as important as you say it is...I trust you. I want to help."

Tails didn't know what to think. He'd been so wrapped up in his own issues these past few days, fighting a silent war with his own identity, and fearful for what he might do to those he loved, that a genuine display of how much his friends truly cared for him nearly knocked him off his feet. For the first time since his revelation in the server room, he felt a small spark of optimism.

He just hoped that, once Rotor and the others discovered the truth, they'd still feel this way.

"I...I appreciate that. But I still don't want you coming in with me. You've got your blaster, right?"

"Always."

Tails glanced skyward, "Then get to the top of one of these trees and spot me. I don't plan to get into any trouble, but if I do, some cover fire would really help."

"Consider it done, but don't think I'm happy about this. You owe me one hell of an explanation after all this."

"You're not the only one," Tails commented under his breath.

o-o-o-o

"Bogey at 3-o-clock, Tails. 'Round the corner."

"Roger."

Tails already knew that, of course. Now that he was down in the thick of it, his cybernetic link was strong enough to pinpoint any nearby enemies that might accost him. Still, it was nice to have the backup, plus the comfort of a familiar voice. A little redundancy was more than welcome if it meant he could get in and out of this hellhole without incident, and for once, Tails didn't feel like he was completely alone in this fight.

He waited until the aforementioned bot was out of sight before slipping around the edge of the main building. His target wasn't there, but was instead an unassuming (some might say squatty) outbuilding nearby, decorated with all the taste one would expect from the doctor. Which is to say, none at all. Not all Robotnik outposts contained a dedicated network terminal, but by necessity, they all contained some access point to the infrastructure, which Tails knew with near certainty was in that shack.

Dipping past a few more roaming guards, Tails got to work on the door to the building. A simple keycode lock that he could hack in his sleep even if he weren't a walking computer; doubtlessly the doctor didn't expect anyone to show much interest in this particular access point.

Not covering your bases, doc, Tails thought idly to himself, Guess it's that ego of yours.

With a simple wireless interface - not from his communicator, but from himself - the android was through the system and in the door. The equipment in the one-room structure was basic, as he expected, and possessed no terminal, but that was fine. He was going to be the terminal, after all.

The front panel of the central machine opened without resistance, and Tails got to work connecting with the network. He was getting quite adept at controlling the more robotic elements of his body, and quickly opened the connecting ports that had surprised him in the workshop a mere two days ago. He connected himself to the machine, mentally triggered the interface, and then the world went...digital.

Directly interfacing with a computer while you yourself are a computer was an experience beyond description. It was nothing like in the movies, as one might have expected, where the hero wanders around in a stylized dreamscape of pixels and electronic noises, looking for a physical representation of files and folders.

No, Tails was in another headspace, an experience completely removed from traditional concepts of self. The sea of information surrounded him, though in this realm he had no body. He didn't move through the network so much as he became a part of the network. He didn't see, or hear, or feel, he could only know or not know.

And he knew what he was after.

He became aware of the breadth of the system, and to be quite honest he wasn't entirely ready for it. But he was part of it from the beginning, in a way, so it detected no intrusion. He was free to traverse the cyberscape at his discretion. It took him a moment to get his bearings, but soon enough he was able to navigate his consciousness well enough to track down the logs. There were records upon records detailing thousands of projects. Some failed, some were successful. Some were typed, others recorded with video or audio. But the largest was obvious.

[PROJECT BRUTUS]

The key to his existence, the answers he needed, were right there at his metaphysical fingertips. He tapped into the data, and with as much terror as excitement, initiated the download.

Only to be suddenly and unceremoniously thrust out of the cyberscape.

The metallic, tinny voice he heard next sounded from his left as Tails jerked back into consciousness, the words only barely resembling coherent speech as his mind struggled to re-adapt to the material world. As he whirled around the fox found himself face-to-face with the tell-tale red eyes of a SWATbot.

"Tails! Tails come in! KID! GET OUTTA THERE!"