Ladies Who Lunch
…Two months later
This wasn't how senior year was supposed to go at all. Audrey in her calm state of mind
arranged for her daughter to be home schooled by a qualified tutor. It was better this
way. No taunts, no threats, and no cruel jokes. Mindy defied her extreme right-wing
mother and made sure her lunch periods and other free time was spent at the Nichols-
Parker house. Mindy nervously broke a breadstick in half not sure if she should ask a
question.
"Mindy, what's on your mind?" Josh/Dina asked
"Nothing—I was doing my own research on the web and many transgendered don't
even do their real life test…why are you putting yourself through this?"
He/She sipped from a straw in can of diet soda before answering.
"You should know better than to lump people in a category. But if you are going to read
something go to trans hyphen health dot com. And to me, it's good to know who is
accepting and who isn't—right from the start." Josh/Dina picked the pepperoni off the
pizza.
"I wonder how Drake---"
"Before you start, knock it off."
"I'm sorry, but I can't like him, Dina. I can't. Not after all the crap he's put you through.
He's about as understanding as a starving shark."
"That may be and I love you for caring. But I'm always going to love Drake even if he
never can return that feeling."
Due to him being an insecure Neanderthal macho jerk.
Mindy kissed her on the lips. It's only been two months but the face electrolysis was
starting to "kick in", she loved the soft cheeks. Mindy never said anything, but she hated
prickly male facial hair. There were some minor blisters and dryness but that was
nothing that needed to be brought up.
"I suppose. Your hair is getting longer in the back."
"That's not an issue. I already have another wig that I special ordered from France,
that's why it's taking so long. Although, I'm happy my real hair is growing…do you have
to leave in twenty minutes?"
"Yeah about that. Where's your tutor?"
"Miss Jones had to leave early."
"I can be persuaded to skip gym class." Mindy purred.
Phys. Ed. was always awful for Mindy who hated being put through a microscope by the
pretty popular girls, but the 'dyke jokes' just wouldn't quit and she knew if she was
pushed hard enough she'd in the Principal Raymond's office for starting a fight.
The doorbell rang.
The UPS man got a surprise two weeks ago when Josh/Dina came down the stairs in
dark mauve twin set and pleated white skirt.
"It's here, Mindy!"
"Your wig?"
"No. Something else I ordered from that vintage store in Los Angeles. Hand me that box
cutter on the table."
It was a vintage white corset with built in bra. What a great addition this would be. Even
after the SRS surgery.
"Wow…that's really pretty, Dina. It's a pity we are different sizes and can't share
clothes."
"I have to try it on…"
"I'll help you…."
Mindy needed the touching. They haven't made love in months. She had to respect that
they might never again in the male-female way.
"I want to make love to you, too."
It's bad enough he had to still pee with the penis. Josh/Dina tried sitting down on the
toilet to urinate but made a mess due to the extreme nervousness of wanting to get it
right.
"It's okay. I realize you are in transition." She laced the back of the corset up for her
girlfriend, the criss-cross laces making her lower region throb.
"Mindy, if you want to, we still have time. Tighter please don't worry about hurting me."
This was going to make all those wonderful and soft sweaters that Grammy sent him/her
look one thousand times better. Grammy also sent a handwritten ten-page letter and the
words that meant the most of him were in her last paragraph:
…I will always love you, Joshie, Dina. It's just a name. You're beautiful no matter what.
I'm sorry that I am in the Caribbean on one of my adventures, but I will be in San
Diego before you go in for your surgery.
Love, your Grammy
P.S.-Remember it's what inside that really counts.
The good mood was ruined when Walter came home early to pick up some papers; he
looked as if he ate a whole crate of sour lemons from the tree outside.
Walter Nichols didn't care about getting the folder that he left in the bedroom. His son
was wearing a corset. He wished somebody would just shoot him so he wouldn't have
to be a witness to this vulgarity.
"Dad…" Mindy had just finished tying the bow in the back, "Dad.." Josh/Dina grabbed
her blue v-neck sweater off the sofa. "Dad…"
By the time He/She got outside the Buick was speeding to get out of the driveway.
"Dad…"
"I'm sorry, Dina."
"I'm sorry, too. Listen, why don't you go back to school? I have homework to do for Miss
Jones and I want to go vent on my Yahoogroup."
Josh/Dina met about ten fantastic online friends. Everyone told him he/she was normal.
It was society's problem if they couldn't accept it. But that didn't erase the constant
hurting of a life without Drake or Walter in it. Most of the California members were going
to meet at member Veronica's house in Santa Monica next month to see the 2005
filmed called American Beauties. It was a story about four immigrant male to female
transgenders.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," Josh/Dina tugged at the strand of pearls, "And I want to look up some DVDs to
bring to Veronica's party. I'm fine, really. This is unfortunately par for the course."
One more kiss on the lips.
"We're still having lunch tomorrow?"
"Of course we are."
There was still guilt over the decision. All of the great people on the internet group told
Josh/Dina, not to feel guilty. But many members on the list all had at least one family
member who "wasn't cool with it". Brothers (there was a shocker) were less supportive
than sisters. Fathers (another surprise there) fewer than mothers.
But the need to go through with the true identity was more important and necessary then
satisfying the fragile egos of a slightly overweight TV weatherman and a cocky teenage
boy who used females for pleasure.
Audrey came home to find Dina loading the lunch dishes in the dishwasher.
"Hi, Sweetie. How was lunch with Mindy?"
"Good, Mom. I'm going upstairs for awhile to use my computer," He/She was halfway
out the swinging door before turning around.
"What is it, Dina?"
"I've come to a conclusion. For my own mental health---I'm done chasing them. If Dad
wants to talk to me—well he won't anytime soon. Ask him why he left the house a few
minutes ago when he had to have come back for a reason. And I can't tell you how many
times I thought of going through your phone book and calling Uncle Richard just to try
and reach Drake---I can't do this anymore. He knows where I am and I don't hear the
phone ringing nor do I get a letter in the mail. I'm done chasing them. I'm simply done
with them."
And for one moment of confident bravado there were no tears. Just a solid
determination to stop living this Josh Nichols lie and cross another day off the calendar
in red ink until Dina Nichols would be officially 'born'.
Fuck Drake and Walter.
What they thought did not matter. Not anymore.