It was a dark abyss outside, nearing midnight and exceptionally cold for an autumn night in the tropics. Business for the pub was surprisingly sparse, for everyone was at home or at sea, traveling to get home, during this time of year. The front door opened, letting in a cold rush of air and a small man dressed in thick, dark clothes. He clinked slightly with each step, suggesting that he had armaments and the possibility that he was a pirate. The man walked up to the bar and sat down next to a stool occupied by a flamboyantly dressed man. He ordered Irish dark ale and settled in, hunched up against the cold.
"What's your name, love?" asked the flamboyant man, raising his eyebrow at the man size, or lack there of. "Richard," the man replied, removing his tri-corn and scarf, "Who might you be?" The flamboyant man smiled, a flash of gold teeth, and replied, "I'm Captain Jack Sparrow. Surely you've heard of me?" Richard smiled back at Jack, it was tight lipped and sad, "Yes; in fact, I'm looking for you."
"Ah, my reputation precedes me," Jack said flashing another bright smile, "Why so morose, little man?" "Did you merely not hear me, or are you really that daft?" Richard said, though there was little humor in his tone, "I'm looking for you." Jack laughed raucously and put his hand on Richard's tiny shoulder, "Wanna join me crew? Have a death wish, do ye?" Richard nodded, a small, true smile breaking out upon his face.
"We sail in the morn, which is rather soon," Jack continued as Richard received his ale and took several gulps. "I know weapons quite well," Richard replied, "And most say I fight like I was bred for it." Jack laughed again, downing his rum and urging Richard to finish his own drink, "You sound like just the thing for the Pearl!"
"I've got a room here, and you're welcome to stay," Jack said when Richard finished his drink. "I think I should like that," Richard replied, a small smile tugging at his lips. Jack stood and beckoned Richard to follow him. "It's this way, and hurry! I'd like to get some sleep before the morn," Jack said before he turned and walked to his room with Richard in tow.
…
Once the door was shut, Richard found himself shoved against the door with Jack laving at his tonsils. Richard responded to the kiss exuberantly, and they broke apart several minutes later.
"I missed you, lad," Jack said, panting heavily and placing butterfly kisses on Richard's face. "I missed you too, Jack," Richard responded as he hugged Jack tightly, "Please, don't leave me again."
"What?" Jack questioned with evident shock, "I didn't leave you; quite the contrary, actually!" Richard shook his head slightly in confusion before saying, "You left me. I remember, Jack." "I did no such thing!" Jack said, and he was about to continue when he heard giggling coming from within the lavatory. He stalked over to the door and pulled it open, revealing the culprits: Will and Elizabeth.
"What the bloody - ? You little… eunuch I swear I'll - !" Jack lunged for Will, and was attempting to strangle him when Richard broke the up.
"What in the blazes were you two thinking?" Richard asked Elizabeth as though she were a misbehaving child. Elizabeth giggled and said in her posh voice, "We thought you needed to appreciate your love!" She giggled again and reverted to her usual tone, "Just like Will and I did."
Richard smiled at the two miscreants, before he ushered them out, saying, "You've interrupted us enough for one night!"
Finally alone again, Jack swept Richard into his arms. "What do you think about make-up sex?" Jack asked as he plopped Richard down on the bed and loomed over him. "I think you're ahead of our time," Richard answered slyly.
Over the next few days, there were many complaints from customers about a strange racket coming from one of the rooms. "Coincidentally," Jack and Richard were no where to be found. Luckily for them the odd commotion stopped just a short while before they reappeared.