Something Like That . . .
Part II
Ramón and Julia (Act 1)
Temari yawned as she looked at herself in the mirror, holding the Julia costume over herself. "A real Shinobi would never wear this." She commented on her extravagant dress, but the lights dimmed and suddenly there was narration provided by Ino . . .
"A long time ago, in the lands of Myth and Fantasy—"
"There is no village of Myth!" Someone shouted.
The narrator continued, barely acknowledging the outburst, "Shaddap Kiba, don't make me come down there, I'll get you myself and you won't have to wait for your dramatic death scene! Uh, I mean a long time ago two villages were at war! Many battles were fought, and many brave Shinobi were lost . . . I said many battles were fought . . . what the heck are you idiots doing?" Ino screamed.
A little reluctantly the two "armies" came out to the stage and began fighting . . . poorly. The most enthusiastic was Rock Lee, whose fists of fury were carefully avoided by the less zealous actors.
"Come, I shall destroy you all!" Rock Lee cried, "For I, the great Ramón will—"
"Damn it Lee I told you you're not playing Ramón!" Ino cried.
"Why not?" That crybaby Shikamaru demanded, "He's perfect!"
"Eyebrows, eyebrows, eyebrows!" Ino cried, and Temari agreed. Those things were so freaky . . . there was no way she'd pretend to be in love with Lee.
So who was playing Ramón? She hoped it was that Neji kid, he was pretty good looking . . . except he was currently on the side of the "fantasy" nin along with her brothers and Kiba, so . . .
"What are you all—did you read the script! Why are you wearing—oh never mind!"
That comment was probably directed at the fact that like Temari nobody had put on their tights except Lee, they were just dressed regularly. Some of them accessorized, Tenten wore a pretty gold tiara, and Shikamaru was wearing a queer little purple cape, and wisely perhaps, Chouji had taken one of the prop swords, which he used to fend off one of Kankuro's puppets.
Ino sighed resignedly and said "Alas, but where upon the battlefield is our brave Julia?"
Temari just stood on the side lines and scoffed. "Forget that, let those losers beat each other senseless."
"Get out there before you ruin the play!" Ino cried into her ear with the microphone.
Temari shuddered and stumbled onto the 'battlefield' and was immediately beset by Lee.
"Beautiful Julia, I Ramón have come for your hand—hey you're not Sakura-chan!"
"Caught that?" Temari asked, annoyed.
"And you're not Ramón!" Ino cried, throwing the microphone at him, and snapping it back to her hand with the cord.
"Ouch! Very well, I concede the role to Shikamaru!"
"You can't call him that; you have to call him Ramón!" Chouji said.
"Aw man, he's Ramón?" Temari pouted.
"He's the only one who could remember the lines in time and . . . okay, where the heck did he go?" Ino demanded.
The audience went into an uproar, Temari bowed and Ino ran out onto the stage, waving her arms and crying for the curtains to close.
Ino shook her head, "Okay, everyone get off the stage, Hinata! Hinata! Get those props set in place!"
"B-but I don't like having to be the props!" Hinata said.
"Hey, you want to stay you're gonna work!" Ino cried.
"I don't want to stay, you're forcing—"
"Get the props!" Ino cried.
Hinata created some clones (two) and the three of them went onto the 'battlefield' and played dead.
Ino hurried everyone else off the stage, "Find Shikamaru!" She cried, "Temari, you stay here and pretend to be inspecting the bodies!"
"Uh . . . okay." Temari complied.
The curtains drew back again, Ino returned to her role as narrator, "After the bloody battle, our heroin Julia inspects the dead, searching for survivors from her village's ever shrinking ranks . . . our hero Ramón . . . I said our hero Ramón . . ."
"Found him!" Neji called, shoving Shikamaru on stage. "He was asleep behind the stage!"
"Sleeping?" Temari whispered, "When did you become narcoleptic?"
"I was bored, this is so annoying." Shikamaru whispered back.
"Ahem, our hero Ramón happens upon her on the battle field—"
"Oh right, were enemies! Let's fight!" Temari cried, leaping into the air and landing right in front of Shikamaru, she drew her fist back to punch him but she froze.
Stupid shadow control jutsu!
"Yeah . . . ahem. Never before have I looked upon such a fair lady. Prithee what is tine name?" Shikamaru said with no enthusiasm.
Temari blinked—or tried to and failed—and whispered "You know my name, and are you hitting on me in front of all these people?"
"The play." Shikamaru explained in a whisper.
"Oh right!" Temari nodded—or tried to and failed, her mouth seemed to be the only thing she could move. "Uh . . . yeah. Well I'm hot stuff, that's common knowledge. I am Julia of Myth—"
"Fantasy." Shikamaru whispered.
"Right, Fantasy."
"And what brings thee beauty to this battlefield so bloody?"
Temari had an idea, "Release me from this jutsu and I'll show you."
Shikamaru shrugged—so did Temari, but not of her own will—and then she was free.
She knelt down besides Hinata number two. "Oh my gentle, sweet sister. Wimpy, I knew her well . . . we were sisters all of her life and most of mine. Now she's dead. Except for her hair."
Temari's hand shot out and she tickled Hinata, who began to giggle, and then laugh, she leapt up and tried to escape Temari's tickles.
The crowd laughed, Ino cried "Uh, hey uh . . . and of course Julia is an incredible Medical Nin."
The crowd applauded lamely as Hinata and her clones disappeared.
"Uh . . . okay . . . well in search of Julia, her brother . . . uh brothers and his—their team close in on Ramón, he must flee, but not before Julia asks to see him again."
"I don't want to see you again!" Temari cried, "You're my enemy, I will destroy you!"
Shikamaru shook his head, "Troublesome woman." He sighed.
She'd said all that just to hear him say that. "Well in that case how's about five at my place?"
Shikamaru sighed, "Beauteous maiden, by your window shall I stand when the moon shines full."
"I said five horn dog!" Temari cried.
Shikamaru just shook his head and turned and walked off. The curtains closed and Ino came rushing towards her, "That was good; your lack of effort is obvious!"
"Well if you'd give me a script—"
"Oh . . . well there's no time now, just remember that you're supposed to be in love with Ramón!"
"I thought the relationship should move slowly, resist him a bit, you know? So he doesn't think I'm easy." Temari said.
"You're not you, you're Julia." Ino pointed out. "Julia is really easy."
Temari's eyes narrowed. "There's a sex scene isn't there?" She accused.
Ino became very busy with a stack of blank papers, "Sorry, no time now, have to get ready for the next act, get into position, its almost time for the window scene!"
More to Come . . .
Writer's Note: Well I told you I'd update as reviews came, so here's your reward you five wonderful reviewers and thanks for the "vote of confidence" Cass (Sun-Tzu), I promise to screw up with all my might just for you. And for your information, you troublesome woman, joining the ranks of ShikaTema devotees is actually very different than working on Ranma 1/2 stories. Unlike NabiRyo, ShikaTema actually still has a slight chance of happening, I could be wrong but I don't think it's actually been officially decided yet. Unlike Nabiki and Ryoga they actually acknowledge one another and share some moments that could be viewed as a typical teenage romance, in other words I've traded a dead horse for a living one that's easier to ride.
Now the idea to do this as a play actually came to me as I was arguing with someone (right Sun-Tzu?) about the possibility of ShikaTema over ShikaIno. We ended up comparing them to Romeo and Juliet and she said "Well write a fan fiction like that, I promise you wont get any reviews" so I did, and cheated by requesting reviews for once. (Incidentally even she reviewed) So really, if you like this story thank Sun-Tzu for making me write it, I was going to just keep my fingers crossed for the couple and stay out of it all but our conversation moved me to write this story's first three chapters and I'm working on the fourth.
Now it's not that I've never read Romeo and Juliet (well actually . . .), or that I haven't seen that movie where they run around in cars and shooting at each other, the reason this is so far from it is that I refuse to adhere strictly to that story, Ramón and Julia (Wish I'd bothered to think up Japanese names, but I wanted the Romeo and Juliet thing to be as obvious as possible) is very loosely based on it, it's a ninja tale and someday I might tackle it seriously . . . but I doubt it.
The window scene is just . . . well, basic spoof material, not to mention it ended up being my favorite chapter so far so review if you want to see it.
Yes Cass (Sun-Tzu), I'm cheating.
It feels good.
Cheers!