Welcome Insanity...now leave!
A/n:Hello!I'm starting this little selection cause I was so bored these things just randomly came to me!Ya there is indeed somthing wrong with my head but I know the
Chapter 1:Sharing rooms
Ever since Ed became a homunculus, the homunculus household, had become even crazier.Since there were already 7 sins,so Ed couldn't have a name of a sin.Nope,instead he is from now on called Insanity.And believe me its was a good name for him since he makes everyone around him go insane, not to mention that Ed himself was clearly classified insane.
Anyways, since the humunculus household already had 8 people living there plus Greeds little friends,so there was no room for Ed to call his own.So naturaly he had to share a room.Sadly for our cute litte(Ed:I AINT FUCKING LITTLE,though I must admit I am cute !!!)Edo has to share a room with our favorite green palm tree-
-Dramatic Silence-
ENVY!
The green haired tree thingy hated the idea of sharing a room with the blonde chibi.Envy was so pissed off he deiceided to talk spaz on Dante to make her change her mind about Ed staying in his room."Yo old hag!"Envy yelled as he entered Dantes study.Dante looked up from her book and asked him ever so casualy,"Oh,Envy.I didn't hear you come in,"She finished with a smirk."You fucking bitch!I wanna know why the fuck I'm stuck sharing my room with that pipsqueek!"Envy yelled,and just as he finished his sentence the ground began to shake.
The door to the study came flying open and on the other side of the door was an enraged chibi."I'M NOT A FUCKING PIPSQUEEK YOU GREEN PALM TREE THAT IS A CROSS DRESSER!!!"Ed yelled and then dissapeared into thin air."Okay...anyways...",Dante cleared her throat,"My dear sweet,sweet,Envy.I know you don't like the Elric boy because he resembles Homhenhiem of light but you need t-""I don't care that he looks that bastard!"
Hohenhiem runs out of the closet and yells cutting off Envy,"I'm not a bastard I'm a turkey!"The oldest humunculus threw Hohenhiem a roll of tape,"Go play..."The blonde man caught the tape and began to eat it."Yummy!!"He shouted as he began to burrow a hole in the ground and dissapears.
Envy and Dante just look at each other with a look written on there faces -What-The-Fuck-Was-that-About-.Envy being the impatent one and decided to break the silence with another rant."Anyways I don't wanna share a room with him because he is insane!He keeps talking about chicken nazis coming to invade and that nacho cheese in running the white house!"Dante just looked at him as though he were crazy."If you don't believe me I'll show you!"He said as he marched out of the room and headed towards the yard where Ed was presummned to be residing.
As if he could read Ed's mind there indeed sat the boy in the middle of the yard with his back to Envy and Dante.From what they could hear Ed was talking to himself.The two watching him decided to move up a bit so they could hear him clearly.
"Shh...you must be quiet Captin Morgen!If your not they might hear you and our plans!"Envy and Dante looked at one another,"Who is he talking to?"Asked Dante."Look in his hands."Envy stated as he pointed to Ed's hands.
In his hands was a potato with a spoon sticking out of it."Oh my..."
"So anyways like I was saying Captin,the nazi chickens plan to attack at dawn,get all of your troops ready,this battle...they might not be able to get value sized meal with everything on the sides."Ed stated making a look of deep depression.
"He just has imagination Envy,you should get one."Dante said as she walked back into the house.
"Oh god..." Envy breathed as he walked into the house and up to his room.
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For the rest of the evening eveything was fine.That was until everyone was heading to go to bed,thats when the trouble began again.
Envy lay on his bed his face down in the pillows trying to sleep,but he just couldn't sleep knowing Ed was standing right beside him next to the bed staring at him.Ed didn't do anything at first so Envy just tried to play it off and act like he wasn't there.But when Envy didn't aknowlege him while he was standing there quietly was when Envy was ready to kill him.
The blonde chibi then began to poke at Envy with a noodle he managed to snag at dinner.Envy rolled over and stared at Ed,"What!"Ed looked at him with cute adroble puppy eyes.
"I don't have a bed and the floor is hard,can I sleep in your bed?" Ed sounded so cute envy couldn't turn him down."Fine what ever I don't care,just don't cling on me or kick me."Ed then hopped into the bed with Envy and fell asleep instantly.
The next morning Envy had gotten woken up by a nice kick to the ribs.So to be nice he diceided to return the favor,he kicked Ed out of bed.Ed woke up,"Ahh!!!Leave me alone pequin!I swear it wasn't I who took your toothpaste!!Ahh!!"
The palm tree got out of bed and smacked Ed in the face,"Shut the fuck up already!!"Ed looked at him in shock,then without warning slapped him clear across the face.Envy was very very very pissed off now.So he stabbed him threw the chest and then threw him to the floor.Ed laid there dead for about 2 seconds when the door burst open.
"BROTHER! Oh yea! NOO!!"Al shouted as he came threw the door.He was painted red and look like he was wearing a costume of a pitcher glass.(A/n: Picture Al as the KoolAide dude)"I'll save you!"
All of a sudden Eds head popped up,"Al...What the fuck?"He was questioning Als aperince."Its a new job..."-acward silence-
"Anyways...I HAVE COME TO SAVE YOU BOTHER FOR I AM THE PHILOSEPHERS STONE!"Al yeld almost sounding like Armstrong,he really needs to stop hanging out with that guy.Al opend his chest plate to reveil a cheese hogie.
"Thats not the stone Al..."Ed stated Al just nodded,"I know,I'm just hungry!"
Ed looked at Envy,"Well...I'm going to go an talk to Captin Picklepuck!"
Envy has never been the same since...
A/n:This is an act of pure randomness...I have alot of issues if you couldn't gess...oh well REVIEW AND I SHALL GIVE U A PENGIN WITH A SHOE!
