Unclaimer: Lemonsa no owns, no sue her. 'sides I only own this stuffed turtle. AND YOU AIN'T GETTING I, FUCKAAAA!

Chapter : 3 : Steve

Cheesy and Ambo woke up in the Slytherin dorm rooms on the first day of classes

"Shchool time!" Cheesy yelled.

"Oh what fun we shall have!" Ambo helped with the yelling, succeeding in waking up the rest of their dorm peoples.

Then they both stopped with the omg-it's-too-fucking-early-to-be-yelling yelling and looked over to the bed situated between Ambo's and Jub's. It was empteh!

"WHERE'S THE LEMON!" the screamed in panic.

"Citrum, where for art thou Citrum!" wailed Ambo.

The pair leapt out of their pickle and cheese shaped beds and dressed quickly before running downstairs to the Slytherin common room.

"LEMON!" they yelled.

Of course, they had no idea of the changes that Lemon had gone through over night! Muahahahahahaha! I know!

…Sorta…I'm really just winging this thing, letting the creative juices flow.

…Ew…Dirty…

Anyway!

"Lemo ain't home right now," said a voice-that-sounded-like-Lemo-but-obviously-wasn't-because-it-sounded-like-a-dude from behind them. "She decided I would be a better candidate for the more violent pranks she had planned."

Cheesy and Ambo whipped around so fast that they almost became whipped cheese and whipped…Ambo…And then I'd have to put them in those cool ass lil spray can thingys…

w00t for spray can thingys!

Anyways…

"Steve!" they cried.

Myes! For it wasn't Lemo, it was Steve! Lemo's other personality whom hasn't been mentioned until now.

"Yo." greeted Steve. Steve was the more…violent of Lemo's personalities. He was taller than Lemo (somehow…This is teh Potterverse, ok? Everything and anything can happen as long as I get it on paper), his hair was shorter, and he wore red pants and a black top instead of Lemo's freakishly curly black dress 'cause that would be weird. He did like to wear Lemo's purple (or as I like to say, plurple) eyeliner though. Steve always wore Lemo's beanie though, 'cause Lemo would have killed him if he went out in public without it due to chronic hat-hair.

"So, Steve," Cheesy began. "It's been a few months, how's it going?"

"It's been rather boring living in Lemo's head with all her other personalities." He said. "Her head is rather…empty."

…Mumbob says that all the time…bitch…

Ambo tilted her head to the side. "Lemo has more than two personalities?" she questioned.

Steve went all shifty eyed. "Let's not go into that right now…"

"Alright…" Ambo said eyeing him suspiciously. "Hey...Don't you usually carry around a huge axe?"

"Myea, It's up in the boys dorm." Steve answered.

Cheesy raised an eyebrow. "Why's it up there?"

"Well I wouldn't exactly put it in the girls dorm, could I? You lot are all…nekkid in there…" he answered pulling a face.

"Roooight…Let's go to breakfast." Cheesy said, turning to go up the stairs leading out of the dungeons.

"Rap sucks."

Steve and Cheesy nodded to Ambo's random (and true) comment.

"That it does, Ambo," Steve said putting his arms over hers and Cheesy's shoulders and leading them out the door. "That it does."

w00tscenechange!

When the trio entered the Great Hall, they hadn't expected to be glomped by a flying pink ball called Jub.

"Meh friendlies!" She yelled, pulling all three of them into a choking hug. She then paused and narrowed her eyes as Timmy Weasley walked past. "It's the pimple," she hissed glaring at the pus filled zit attached to Timmy's greasy little weasel face. "I'll get that bastard, just you wait…."

Steve took Jub by the shoulders and steered her towards the Slytherin table. "Come and eat breakfast," he said. "I'll beat Timmy up for you later."

"Myay!" she cried and pranced off to the breakfast table.

"Onward to victory!" Ambo yelled, and, using her arms like wings, 'flew' off after Jub.

Cheesy and Steve planned to follow, but were, once again, glomped.

"CHEESEH!" shouted the blue haired boy who was currently attached to her and Steve's shoulders.

"Mr. Sexy!" Cheesy shouted back. "…You're nekkid…"

"Myea! Nudie run all the way, man!" Mr. Sexy whooped gleefully. Indeed, Mr. Sexy had ditched his leather pants and grey top in favor of…nothing.

"Oh…wow…" Steve blinked staring at Mr. Sexy's ass...ets. Myea, assets. cough

"So, Mr. Sexy, wanna go have hot gay sex sometimes?"

"Sure!" Mr. Sexy replied. "But for now I must go put my clothes back on. Woooooooooosh!"

With that, Mr. Sexy ran off to the dungeons.

"When'd he get his nipple pieced?" Steve asked.

"Over the Summer Vacay." answered Cheesy.

Once Cheesy and Steve FINALLY made it to breakfast, they discovered Ambo and Jub had devoured all the pies! Those fiendish bastards!

So Steve had toast instead. Oh the toasty goodness! Toast kicks pie's ass any day!

Ambo jumped out of her seat and looked up at the ceiling, "HOW CAN YOU SAY/TYPE SUCH A THING!" she screamed.

"Your words BURN US!" cried Jub.

Ha! I laugh at your toastless pain!

Steve just continued eating his toast and Cheesy stole Jub's last pie like the thiefa she is. OOOOH WHAT A WONDROUS MORNING!

TEH END, MAN!

Is P.E class over yet?

A RANDOM MINI INTERLUDE THINGY!

"Hey Steve?"

"Myes, Ambo?"

"Where does Lemo go when you're in control of her body?"

"Hell."

"…Hell?"

"Myea. That's where our family lives, so Lemo goes all out-of-body-experience like and goes home for a while."

"That lucky bitch…She has the internet there doesn't she!"

"Indeed she does, Ambo, indeed she does."

TEH END, AGAIN!

Dude, someone's smoking and it shmells bad.