Merged

Chapter 16

Jontek was pleased that he and T'Pol were traveling back to Earth for Hoshi's and Malcolm's wedding. From the date the invitations had arrived, they'd had two months to plan the time away from their jobs on Vulcan. Seeing as Jontek worked for T'Pol's Department, it was felt that to quash any rumors that might develop as well as to provide Hoshi with some assistance, T'Pol would stay at Hoshi's home. Since taking on the Communications Department of Starfleet Academy, Hoshi had purchased a home in the hills of San Francisco. It was nice. Jontek would, of course, stay in his apartment.

Malcolm had a small apartment as well, although he seldom used it. As chief of Starfleet Security he was often away, providing training in weaponry and ballistics, inspecting various ships' security sections, and generally enjoying his life. He planned to give the apartment up after the wedding and move into Hoshi's house. He had quite of bit of his things there anyways.

Porthos had been left back on Vulcan with Spobra's family. The canine was getting older and the change in temperatures, gravity, air pressure and all for a second time in seven months did not seem kind to the animal. Besides, Savan had figured out a recipe that provided Porthos with the taste and texture of cheddar but without the side effects. Jontek wasn't sure how he did it, but the little dog sure enjoyed being at their home.

As Jontek walked back into the space that had been Jon's home on Earth, he felt memories playing through their shared mind from Jon's viewpoint. This had been his home for many since he'd joined Starfleet. He had returned again and again to this abode. Every picture on the wall, every photo still spoke of the man who had inhabited it. He looked out the window at San Francisco and suddenly, Sontek felt a deep sadness envelope his other half.

"Jon? Are you all right?"

"I guess it just hit me. This really isn't my home anymore. We live on Vulcan."

"It will always be our home as well. I believe there is a concept on Earth. One's home away from home. This apartment is like that We may live on Vulcan but you are still of Earth.."

The human side sighed. "You're right. Whenever we come to Earth, this is our home. Still, I can't help but think about the way things used to be for me. I'm not complaining, Sontek. I truly feel content in our life. Yet…"

"You wish to exist as yourself alone again. I understand. I too miss being only me. I accept our fate and have grown to truly embrace your presence. It has been an incredible journey. Yet, I cannot say that if there had been another way, I wouldn't have taken it."

They unpacked their luggage, putting their clothing into the still full closet. Jontek pulled out a casual outfit and tried it on. He was surprised to find that the clothes did not fit him quite as snugly as he remembered them. For the first time in awhile, he took the time to really look at himself in the mirror. He found that he'd lost weight.

Continuing to examine the man in the mirror, what he saw pleased and shocked him at the same time. On the one hand, he could clearly see that they were Sontek with all the physical attributes of the Vulcan. And yet, there was a human countenance as well. It was as if the muscles on his face had accepted both of them and was showing the two to the world as one. They had become truly merged when neither was behind shields.

They decided to try that out as well. Jon was the first to pull up the dividing mental construct and allow Sontek to see himself with their primary consciousness. Sontek had been somewhat concerned to have seemingly lost himself in the merged being. Yet now, looking at himself, he found he looked mostly as he always had. He was fully Sontek now, a Vulcan. It gave him a sense of self. He was satisfied. He called to Jon and let him have his turn. Somehow he knew this would be an emotional experience for the Human, being back on his planet, his space, his 'turf.'

Jon looked into the mirror, holding their primary consciousness, and found a Vulcan face that reflected humanness in it. He knew he would never see his own face in a mirror again. The face he had looked at just about everyday of his life prior to the accident. The face that he saw in the pictures that were scattered around the apartment. He and his father. He, A.G., and Trip. He and his crew. He, Rebecca, and Porthos. He and T'Pol.

He was surprised to see a tear drop from his eye. He wiped it away quickly. There was nothing to be gained by feeling sorry for himself. This was reality. It could not be changed. Yet another tear came unbidden, and then another producing streaks down the high boned Vulcan cheeks. Without realizing when it happened, he found himself on his bed, his face in the pillow which continued to sop up the tears that he didn't seem able to stop. After awhile though, they stopped on their own. He continued to lie on his side on the bed, drained…thinking.

He had to admit, he had found he liked being on Vulcan. Being in a Vulcan's body may have played a role in that feeling but he felt it was more. He enjoyed teaching at the Academy. Mostly, though, he enjoyed being with T'Pol in her environment, seeing her deftly move through Vulcan society with an ease she did not always show with humans. Prior to going to Vulcan, he would have sworn she was comfortable in his world; that she had learned to accept life with humans like a glove. He now knew that was not really true.

A bitter laugh left his lips. His world. His world was now hers. He thought how T'Pol had changed through the years. T'Pol was more comfortable than any Vulcan he had ever known while in contact with humans. He knew she had developed that over time, over the many months and years she had spent on Enterprise. And yet, seeing her on Vulcan, seeing how she handled being on her home world, he knew that the woman he loved was still truly Vulcan.

He stopped for a moment and thought about the man he now was. He suddenly realized that he truly cared about the being he'd been forced to learn to live with. Initially, he'd been certain there was no way that a human and Vulcan could coexist this way. That it was a doomed arrangement from the start. They didn't just coexist though, they thrived. He and Sontek had found a way to do it.

He knew, of course, that it had been a joint agreement to do this. Jon could tell that Sontek cared about him as well. He had helped him to fit in on T'Pol's world. Jon had found that the man he'd been merged with was a being he respected, a man who when presented with an opportunity to live the IDIC had accepted that reality. This experience had taught Jon many things, and learning that Vulcan's came in more than one model had been huge. Oh, he'd accepted that on several levels before. After all, T'Pol had been his first teacher. Then Surak. Then Soval. Yet his experience with Sontek had provided him with a deeper understanding of this reality than any he had faced before. He looked at his timepiece and realized that he'd been musing for over an hour. Time to bring Sontek back.

After contacting the Vulcan, Jon voiced mentally, "Thank you."

"For what?" Sontek's hand reached to his face, feeling the tightness from dried tears. "What happened?"

"I've had a catharsis. For the first time since our accident, my emotions of loss flowed out. I realized that I needed to thank you for accepting me. For finding a way to make this work with me."

"I believe my response should be, 'you're welcome.' Will you be all right or will this catharsis keep occurring? It is not seemly for a Vulcan to cry."

"Yes. I'll be fine. Human males don't generally make a habit of it, either. Human women are another story. I guess I didn't realize how coming back to Earth would affect me."

"Indeed." He checked his timepiece. "We have dinner plans tonight. I believe we should plan on getting cleaned up."

"That is a logical plan."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo

They all arrived at Madame Wong's, Hoshi's favorite Chinese restaurant in San Francisco, enjoying the camaraderie of long friendships. This had been Hoshi's favorite Chinese restaurant in the Bay City for as long as Jon had known her. Hoshi had invited Travis and he was thrilled and happy when all congratulated him on making Lt. Commander. She had asked Phlox as well, but he was back on Denobula and would not be able to arrive until the day before the wedding. Being together like this brought the memory of their fallen colleague, Charles "Trip" Tucker, III to the minds of all gathered. They raised their glasses in toast to the man, sad that he would not be with them again.

Jontek noted that after the toast, the Humans at the table made sly glances at him, not wanting to be seen looking, but exhibiting that very human trait of morbid curiosity.

"I'm still here, guys." He knew that the juxtaposition of considering Trip's death with the reality that they would never see Jonathan Archer again was the key. After all, he'd had a similar reaction earlier. "Look at it this way; you gained Sontek as a friend as well."

"That's true, 'Jontek.'" Travis stated, smiling. "It may not be exactly the same as before, but you both are alive. I'm thankful for that."

"We all are. And happy that you'll be with Hoshi and me on our big day. It means a lot to us."

"Okay, that's enough. Don't need to get emotional about it."

The humans laughed and Jontek gave a smile. T'Pol just raised and eyebrow. The dinner commenced and all parties were happy to provide updates on their most recent activities and plans for the future. Talk turned to the Federation and situations that were of concern in their part of the galaxy.

Travis, still an explorer and close to the scuttlebutt asked, "Did you hear about the Andorian Rowtorn Syndrome? It started on a planet close to Romulan space. They think it might be a virus which took hold during the war since it didn't start affecting their population until Rowtorn was discovered and settled."

T'Pol asked, "What are the symptoms?"

Travis explained. "There seems to be five stages of the disease. First the Andorians experience pain in their muscles and joints with accompanying headaches. This progresses to mental confusion and chronic fatigue, and then to short-term memory loss accompanied by gastrointestinal upsets. Stage Five is characterized by food intolerances, allergies, and vision problems ending quickly in death. It takes about 6 months for the disease to run its course."

Jontek looked thoughtful. "When did this start?"

"Only about eight months ago. It's been spreading from planet to planet, heading towards their home world. My understanding is there isn't a cure since they don't know what's causing it."

T'Pol was concerned. "I don't know why we haven't heard of it on Vulcan. We should be having our doctors working with the Andorians on a potential cure."

"I guess the Andorians haven't been very willing to speak of it until recently. They thought they could handle the epidemic themselves. You know how self-sufficient they are. Now, they are hoping the Federation will help them."

Talk continued through the evening. It was late when they decided to call it a night.
As Jontek headed towards home, something hovered in his thoughts. He couldn't seem to capture the idea, though. He noted that he seemed to be somewhat distracted. He figured that it was, perhaps a combination of his earlier thoughts or perhaps seeing old friends. He decided to let it go for now. At some point the thought was sure to come back.