When he woke up that morning, Reno wasn't expecting it to be his last day on the Planet.
It had started out normal enough -- throwing the alarm clock across the room, which would always mysteriously work the next day; falling out of bed, dragging the sheets along with him; stumbling into the kitchen for a cup of precious coffee; receiving a phone call from Rude to ensure he was actually awake --
"What?"
And that was where his world fell apart.
Reno absently wiped the coffee off his feet, easy enough to do now that he was on the floor. "Are you serious?" he managed to choke out. The silence on the other end of the line only assured him that yes, Rude was very serious.
Reno let out a breath that would only arrive as static in Rude's ear. "Guess it had to happen eventually," he said with a grim chuckle. Again Rude said nothing, his silence managing to convey everything. "Gonna be a bit late, then," he continued, staring at the ceiling. "Gotta prepare, you know."
"Yeah," said Rude finally, his voice seemingly devoid of emotion.
"See you then, partner." A click indicating that Rude had hung up, and then a dull done. Reno closed his cell phone.
For a while he drew designs in the spilled coffee with one finger. For once in his life -- however inaccurate that qualifier was, he threw it in anyway -- Reno was at a loss. If he let it, a blanket of despair would fall over him and he would merely lie there, immobilized.
Instead he stood up, grinning in the face of certain death. "Time to pay the piper," he said to no one in particular, not sure what it meant, but figuring it probably applied.
But before he headed to the appointed meeting-place, he had to pick something up. He had been putting it off, but it was now or never. He went to a certain shop he frequented and stared at the shelves. There were so many possibilities, and yet in the end, nothing would be enough. Instead he picked something at random and took it to the cashier, who at first gave him a confused look, thinking it strange that he would buy such an item; but then upon seeing Reno's face he nodded in pity.
Soon he found himself standing in front of a door that made him shiver with dread. It was an unassuming door, with its number plate and chipped black paint, but Reno knew what lay behind it.
"This is it," he said, presumably to the door. "I'm gonna die in there."
The door, unsympathetic, said nothing.
He opened the door, and there, not even deigning to face him, stood his doom. The figure turned, those terrifying eyes catching his, and before he could have any second thoughts, Reno drew out his specially prepared item and let it fly with a prayer.
And a hand reached out to catch it.
Reno gulped, trying to ignore the knot in his stomach. Now, all hope was lost.
Elena slowly held up her present, wrapped with a rakish red bow. "Why the hell did you get me tampons for my birthday?"
Reno grinned unashamedly. "Well, I kinda figured it was your time of the month, so..."
Later, tied to a chair with a bundle of tampons shoved in his mouth, he reflected that that probably wasn't the best thing to say.