Finding Olivia
Chapter 2: Dirty
He walked down the hallway in silence. He knew where he was headed; he had been there many times before but never to do something like this. He entered the room looking around for someone who could help him but saw no one. He found this very odd but he continued on into the room anyway. His task would be a difficult one and he would like to do it alone if he could, no onlookers.
There was only one sheet covered figure in the room and he approached it slowly. He wanted to stop, to turn and run away but somehow he couldn't pull himself away from the figure. He stood beside the slab where the lost life lay, covered only in a white sheet. He reached gingerly to pull back the sheet with trembling fingers. He didn't want to know. Slowly the sheet came away, revealing first the hair line of the woman. He felt his stomach churn but he tried to deny what he saw. Just because the woman who lay before him had the same hair color, it didn't mean it was her.
He pulled the sheet further down revealing the eyes. They stared back unseeing at him. Big doe eyes, glazed over with death. Even so, he could see the fear in them. There was no need to pull the sheet any further. He knew it was her. He felt the tears pouring from his eyes and spilling down his cheeks. He wanted more than anything to pull the sheet back up and run from the morgue. His hand wouldn't obey his wishes and the sheet continued to pull away from the face of the woman he loved. Her nose and cheek bones became visible to him. If he had doubted it when he had seen her eyes, he didn't now. God, he didn't want to be here.
The sheet had fallen away far enough that her whole face was exposed and still he continued to reveal the remains of a vessel which had once contained the most beautiful soul he had ever known. Her neck was marked with angry red ligatures. With the hand that didn't hold the sheet, he reached out and touched them, gently as if he could heal her, bring her back to him. He could swear that he felt her flinch beneath his touch but he chalked it up to wishful thinking.
He had seen enough. He tugged on the sheet to cover the body again but it practically wrenched from his hand and continued to roll off the body, guided by some unseen force. He fought to grasp it again "No more," he cried as he tried to cover her. When he realized that he wouldn't be able to pull the sheet back, he tried to turn away but her hand flew out and held him there. He was afraid now and had no choice but to stare at what had become of her body.
Under the sheet, she wore no clothing. Her upper body was a collage of bruises that made him want to vomit. Her lower body showed the obvious signs of sexual assault. He wanted to throw up and tried to pull away but the grasp on his wrist grew tighter "No more, please," he begged as he felt his legs give out from underneath him. He collapsed onto the ground sobbing "No," he whispered.
"Look at me," her voice commanded "Look at what you've done to me."
"No," he repeated "It isn't true, this isn't real."
"Look at what you allowed to happen," she accused "Where were you?"
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Where were you when I needed you?" her disembodied voice asked as her hand held him in place "Look at what you let happen to me."
"No, no," he stammered through his tears "I would never…"
"You let me die alone," her tone was as ice cold as the fingers that gripped him "You let me die afraid."
"No," He tried to pull away again "I didn't know," he pleaded for her forgiveness "If I had known, I would have…"
"I died alone, in the dark," her voice nearly screamed "I died slowly after they had beaten me and raped me for hours."
"I'm sorry!" he sobbed as he tried to pry the fingers from his arm. Dear God, they were so cold.
"You let this happen," she accused again "Why didn't you come looking for me? Why did you let them kill me?"
"I'm so sorry!" the sobs continued. The hand drew him closer to the cold slab where her body lay and he found himself afraid, truly afraid. He hadn't meant for this to happen. He would have done everything in his power to prevent it if he could.
"They held me down," she continued "In my weakest moments, when I was in so much pain that I didn't know what was real anymore, I cried for you. I called out your name," her tone became bitter "That just made them more aroused to hear me so broken."
"I'm so sorry," he whispered, reaching out to touch the body and trying to pull the sheet over her again. He had no idea why but he had to pull that sheet over her again.
"You let me die!" her voice screamed again and he felt an unseen fist connect with his gut "I trusted you and when I needed you, you weren't there."
"I'm so sorry," was all he could say as he felt the wind knocked out of him again and again.
"I'm dead because of you!" she screamed as he was flung backwards, the cold fingers finally releasing his wrist as he felt invisible fists and feet begin to beat the shit out of him "You let them do this to me! I hate you!"
"I'm so sorry!" he screamed over and over again "Olivia, I'm so sorry!"
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Elliot shot straight up in bed, gasping for breath. He continued to sob. It had been a week since she had gone undercover and he hadn't heard a word about her. Her name wasn't even whispered in the squad room; it was as if they had all forgotten about her. At least that's what Elliot had thought until the third night.
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He had been walking out of the squad room in his ever present gloomy mood when Munch had come up beside him "You wanna go grab a drink?" the older man offered.
Elliot had turned to see John standing there with the most sincere expression on his face. Fin appeared on Elliot's other side "Count me in," he smiled.
"Who invited you?" Munch joked.
"And who's gonna drive your bony ass home when you drink yourself under the table?" Fin asked with a smirk.
Elliot pulled away from his colleagues "I'll pass," he said softly as he pulled open the door.
"Come on man," Fin said gently "We'll have fun."
"I don't feel like having fun," Elliot murmured.
"I know you miss her," Munch stated as he and Fin followed Elliot relentlessly down the sidewalk "We all do but, what would she say if she knew you were moping like this?"
This made Elliot pause at John's words. She didn't want him to mope. He knew that much but he felt like he was betraying her if he didn't "I can't," he quickened his pace to get away from the other two detectives.
"Just because you have a drink with us doesn't mean you're gonna forget her," Fin called out "Having a good time for two hours isn't gonna mean that somehow you're a bad friend."
Elliot turned around "I know that," he told the two men who stood behind him "I just don't feel like it, okay," he turned and finally reached his car.
"I'm getting real sick of your attitude," John spat "You think you are the only one who has a void in their life ever since Olivia left."
Elliot stepped back out of his car "I'm the only one who cares."
"That's complete bull and you know it," John told him "She was our friend too. We all miss her."
Elliot walked up to his two friends. He stared at them for a long time before he said "One drink and then I really have to go home."
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Elliot was snapped from the memory by the shrill ringing of the cordless phone that sat on his nightstand. He reached for it, wondering who would call his house phone at this hour. If it was work related, the person would normally call his cell. For a moment the hope flickered in his heart that it was Olivia. Still he answered in his professional manner "Stabler."
"Elliot," the spark of hope died upon hearing George's voice "You need to get over here right away. We have something we need to talk about."
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Olivia rubbed her eyes. It was 2:00am and she had gotten stuck at the store doing the books. Normally it would have been Jeremy's job but he had a family emergency and had to leave early so she promised to cover for him.
She had been working at the store for about a week and had found no useful information about EDG. She missed Elliot practically every waking second of every day and when she wasn't awake, she dreamed about him. Sometimes the dreams were good, sometimes they were horrifying nightmares of what could happen to him if a rookie was watching his back on the job.
She heard the office door open and looked up to see her boss, Derek Moonshower enter. He regarded her with a puzzled look for a few seconds before speaking "Persephone," he said surprised "What are you doing here so late?"
"Just doing the books," she answered. She couldn't help feeling a little nervous that she was alone in a room with this man.
Ever since her first day, she had been trying to get the chance to talk to Natalie Moonshower about the bruise that Olivia had seen but the other woman avoided Olivia like the plague. Still Olivia had found it hard not to miss the way that Natalie always seemed to shrink into the background whenever Derek entered a room. This and other such nervous behaviors of Natalie's led Olivia to believe that Natalie was being abused and that her husband, Derek, was the abuser.
"That's Jeremy's job," Derek told her as he took a step closer to where she sat.
"He had a family emergency," Olivia answered, feeling more unsettled the closer Derek moved towards her "I said I'd cover for him."
"You're a good girl," Derek told her as he placed his hands on her shoulders and began to massage them gently.
Olivia pulled away quickly from his touch "I think I should go home now," she said as a way of excusing herself from this awkward and potentially dangerous situation. She stood up and headed for the office door.
Derek blocked her path and leaned in. Olivia could smell alcohol on his breath as he spoke to her "Let me walk you home," he offered.
"No thanks," she said quickly, backing away from him and managing to open the office door "I'll take a bus."
"The busses don't run this late," Derek smiled at her. There was something unsettling in his smile "Let me walk you home. Pretty women aren't safe on these streets so late at night."
Not with you around they aren't "I'll be fine," she reassured him.
"I'd feel better if I made sure you got home safely," he leaned in close to her.
I'd feel better if you didn't "No, it's fine," she was at the front entrance to the store when he grabbed her.
"Persephone," he let the word out slowly as if he was cherishing the taste of it "Don't be like that. Let me walk you home."
"Mr. Moonshower," Olivia began as she pulled away "I told you, I'm fine," her tone was firm. She finally managed to escape his hold on her and she began the long walk back to her place.
There weren't a lot of street lamps but the moon and stars were bright. Olivia would have almost enjoyed the late night walk home in the peaceful Oregon town if it hadn't been for her encounter with Derek Moonshower just before she had left the store. She made her way through the quiet streets, her steps echoing hollowly in the silence that at times seemed almost eerie when she thought of New York.
Finally she reached her street and eventually the door of her own building. A rather bright street light lit up the entrance and revealed who else but Derek Moonshower leaning against the building to the left of the door. It was obvious that he was trying to blend into the shadows.
Olivia took out her keys, wishing more than ever that she had her gun with her but it was upstairs in the drawer of her nightstand. It had taken a lot of arguing on her part to even get Star to concede to letting her have a gun at all. She didn't have a cell phone either. Olivia remained under the street light as she spoke "What are you doing here?"
Derek smiled and took a wavering step towards her. Olivia wondered if he had had more to drink since she had last scene him "Just wanted to make sure you got home safely my dear," he reached out to her with both arms and pulled her into an awkward hug.
"Okay," Olivia managed to remove his hands from her "I'm home, so you can leave now."
Derek put a finger to her lips "You can stop playing this little game of yours dearest," he smiled.
Olivia backed away from him "What game?" she asked. She didn't want to blow her cover by going super cop on his ass but he was quickly forcing her hand in that direction.
Derek pinned her to the side of the building and Olivia realized that going super cop on his ass would do her little good. This guy was way too strong for her. He brought his lips close to hers "Stop pretending you aren't attracted to me."
Olivia wanted to laugh. She wasn't attracted to this guy. She found the very thought of him repulsive "I'm not," she told him as she attempted to duck out from under his grasp.
"Come on Persephone," Derek smiled as he kissed her "Why don't you show me your place," he wasn't asking her, he was telling her.
Olivia tried to fight him off as he moved with her to the door of her building. He was going to take her up to her apartment… her apartment… her gun. She willingly opened the door and walked inside with her boss who the whole time kept an iron grip on her waist.
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"You brought me here to look at a bunch of bank statements?" Elliot asked incredulously. Truthfully, he was glad for the excuse to be pulled away from his bed after the nightmare he had had but he didn't understand what the significance of these statements was.
"Someone's been paying her off!" George waved the pieces of paper around in the air like a mad man "She's a dirty agent!"
TBC
A/N: Interesting cut off I know but review and I'll see what I can do about updating quicker.