Thank you to all my reviewers! So here's Hurley. You asked for it, so you got it.
Hurley'Know your stars. Know your stars. Know your stars.'
"Dude, I can't see you. Where are you?"
'Hugo Reyes, he can speak bird.'
"Bird? Dude, just because that bird said my name-"
'Hugo Reyes, he has many bird friends.'
"Dude, I'm warning you. If you tell anyone-"
'Hugo Reyes, he sings lullabies to his bird friends every night.'
"How did you find out about all of this? I made sure I was alone!"
'Hugo Reyes, he is in love with a bird.'
"If you hurt one feather on Miss Pink Sparkles's wings, I swear I'll kill you!"
'Hugo Reyes, he killed two people.'
"That is so second season."
'Hugo Reyes, he hugs pricker bushes.'
"It was only that one time!" He turned around and looked directly at the hidden camera. "If I could give our readers out there one piece of advice, it's to never hug a picker bush. Trust me, I've learned from experience."
'There's not supposed to be a moral to this story! It's just random, pointless-'
"Dude, relax. I never said that was the moral! I'm just giving them some good advice."
'Whatever. Now where was I? Oh yes. Hugo Reyes, he is a singing chicken in disguise.'
"And what does that make you? A dancing corndog?"
'Oh no!' The body-less voice said seriously. "I've been found out! They're not supposed to know what I am!'
"Dude, I was just joking. Are you really a dancing corndog?"
'No! Now leave my fortress of doom!'
"Dude, it's a hatch."
'Well, it's my hatch, so get out! Or I'll send my hot dog minions of destruction after you!'
"I'm going! I'm going!"
'And tell the others never to come here!' The bodiless voice sighed then said to the camera, 'And now you know Hugo Reyes.'
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So who should I do next?