Title: Sometimes It's Easier (5?)
Rating: PG or K+
Content: Angsting, sappiness
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue
A/N: Since this has really changed direction to what I was originally intending, I'm not entirely sure of it. Concrit would be really appreciated.

For the next few weeks, Lita made a concerted effort, and seemed to be doing well. She'd re-forged friendships with a couple of the other divas, she'd almost convinced the bosses to let her wrestle again, and she was accepting Randy's efforts to build up her self esteem. Randy for his part was relieved, and for a while their relationship was as close to normal as it could get. The little things were significant to Lita, things like making breakfast in bed for Randy on the rare occasions they had a few days at home, like waking up to a text message professing love on the days they were apart. Randy was quite the romantic, contrary to what people might think of him. He was in many ways different to the cocky persona he portrayed on screen: part of that was him, he was immensely confident in his wrestling talent, and he knew he was good looking. The similarities pretty much ended there though. While the Randy Orton on screen was driven and single-minded, the real Randy was laid back, and pretty much happy to let things go as they were. He didn't like to cause arguments, didn't particularly like to cause trouble for others; while he would fight for things to further his career, he wasn't too keen on doing it at the expense of others. He knew that wrestling wasn't exactly a clean or friendly career though, and having grown up in the business, knew that there were too many people who would stab him in the back for a chance at what he had. He wasn't naïve about how things worked.

In essence, Lita saw Randy as a walking contradiction: as both everything he was on screen and nothing he was on screen. It was one of the things that she loved about him, that one part of his character could come out in two different ways, depending on where he was and what mindset he was in. She loved the arrogant side to him, found that self-confidence sexy as hell and somewhat inspiring; but the vulnerable, sensitive side of him that was constantly worrying about her? That was something she adored.

She leant on him, she realised that. His strength and protection was important to her growth, to her confidence; she wasn't reliant though, he wouldn't let her be. In a way, it had helped that they were on different shows, as it meant she couldn't hide behind him when bitchy comments came her way, she had to rely on herself, on her own strength. And, as much as she hated to admit it, she was strong, she was independent; but now she was those things because she wanted to be, not just because she had to be.

It was only a few times a year that the Smackdown and Raw rosters got together, and the Royal Rumble was the first such time since Randy and Lita had got together. By now their relationship was common knowledge in both locker rooms, and the gossip had pretty much subsided. It was the first time Lita would come into contact with Matt since she'd got together with Randy though, and she wasn't looking forward to the inevitable meeting with him. She knew Matt too well, and from his reaction when he'd spoken to Randy, and the things she'd heard since, he wasn't taking their relationship well, despite his assurances otherwise when she'd last spoken to him. In a way, she hadn't really expected him to, as he was the sort of person to hold things close, and hold them for a lot longer than was healthy or necessary.

She decided to bite the bullet and seek him out. At least that way they worst of any confrontation would take place without an audience. He wasn't that hard to find, being, as he usually was, in catering. She caught his eye and motioned for him to follow her out into the corridor. Without a word she walked away, expecting him to follow, which he did. Eventually she found an empty room and walked into it. He slammed the door behind him.

"What do you want?" He was blunt, making the most of her obvious discomfort.

"I wanted to talk to you, and for whatever arguments we're gonna have to happen in private, and right now," she could be as blunt as he was, because all of a sudden she didn't care. She'd apologised, offered olive branches, she'd done everything she could to make amends to Matt. She couldn't, and she decided right now she wouldn't, do anything else.

"What makes you think I want to argue with you?"

"Well the tone of your voice and your attitude for a start," she'd not intended it to be like this, but as he'd come into this as antagonistic, she saw no reason for sparing his feelings, "plus what you said to Randy about me. Did you really think he wouldn't tell me?"

Matt looked a little shocked, before regaining his composure, "should've known that whiny bitch would have gone running to you."

She laughed, "whiny bitch? That's rich coming from you. Matt, grow up and start acting like an adult. Yes, I cheated on you, and yes, I'm sorry about that. I could apologise until the end of my days but I don't think it would make any difference to you because I think that at the end of the day you like being this wronged martyr figure. You need to move on."

"Like you have? Like it was all a fuss over nothing and like nothing ever happened?"

"I nearly destroyed myself after everything that happened, you know that? I was drinking and doing stupid stuff and I didn't care because I thought I had destroyed everything good in my life. It took me pretty much hitting rock bottom before I realised that I deserved a second chance." She was telling herself this for the first time, realising how much she'd changed herself, as well as revealing to Matt what she'd been through. "I know I'm not the one to be giving you advice, but let it go and move on. I mean, if you want you can carry on as you are, criticising me to everyone, then fine, but eventually people are gonna get sick of hearing it."

"I wanted to hurt you like you hurt me," she already knew that, but to hear him say it actually surprised her. "I wanted to do something that would hurt you more than anything else. I was the one in the right here, I was the one who was hurt."

"And you did hurt me. And yes you were the one who got hurt but things are never black and white Matt, you know that. Sometimes it's not about right and wrong, it's about things that just happen. Now let it go, please. Move on." She stared at the man she used to love, although the man in front of her bore little resemblance to the man she'd fallen in love with. They'd grown apart long before she'd fallen for Edge, although neither had been willing to acknowledge that.

"That's easier said than done Lita. You hurt me, don't you think I have the right to be angry? Do you think that this has been easy for me?"

"I know. Although it was me that made the mistake, it hasn't been easy for me either. I loved you Matt, despite everything…" she looked away, not wanting to see that hurt on his face, knowing she'd caused it yet again. Matt was always a man who wore his emotions on his sleeve. If he hurt, you knew.

"I know," he forced a smile, "I… I'm sorry… I never meant to destroy you… hurt you, yeah… but never that… I thought you were stronger than to let my words affect you like that."

"Thank you." His words brought a little peace to her heart, at the same time as reinforcing how well Randy understood her compared to how her relationship had been with Matt.

"I don't know if I can say friends… but truce?"

She nodded, and held out a hand, "truce."

She walked out of the room with a smile, and more confidence than she'd had in a long time. She'd become the person she wanted to be, at long last. And the incredible thing was, she didn't even need to tell Randy all about it. He just knew.

He looked at her, brushed her cheek with his hand and grinned, "you talked to him?"

She nodded, "we called a truce."

"He understands?"

"Yeah… I realised a lot about us."

"Us… you and me, or you and him?"

"Both… you know me better than he ever did."

That surprised Randy, after all six years was a long time to be with someone and yet still not know them, "thank you angel."

"Why?"

"Because," he leaned down and kissed her slowly, tenderly, but with everything he had, "that you've allowed me to know you means the world to me. I love you babe."