Authors' Blab: Third chapter! Yay! Be sure to check out our other two stories up, Emilee & Anna Invade Middle-Earth, and The Guide to Dating In The Shire. Read and review and tell all yo' friends!! –Howard & Porta, AKA: Emilee & Anna
--
The weather in Mirkwood had been quite nice for the first week that Gimli and Legolas stayed there. This is important only because the weather was just about the only thing that had been nice for the first week they were there.
As Gimli soon learned and Legolas had already known, Dimthuleion was indeed a snobbish worm, and they'd both had the displeasure of running into him several times in the course of the week.
For instance….
Legolas hadn't seen the worm come up behind him as he was taking a stroll in the garden during the morning of some day in the middle of the week.
"Well look who it is." Dimthuleion's snobbish voice called from behind the prince.
Turning around, Legolas raised a brow and forced a smile to the elf, "Good morning, Dimthuleion." He said politely.
"Oh drop the act, you majesty."
Legolas tensed as Dimthuleion crossed the little space between them and smirked only a few paces in front of him. "Excuse me?"
"You heard me." Dim snarled, "Don't pretend to tolerate me, ever since I saved your father from the assassination attempt you haven't been able to speak to me without wishing you were just like me."
Raising an amused brow, Legolas smirked at Dimthuleion and started to walk away, "I'll see you at dinner."
"You don't deny it?"
Legolas sighed deeply and turned around, taking everything he had to remain calm. "Arguing with you is beneath me Dimthuleion."
Dimthuleion's eyes blazed, "It matters not. I know the truth." He hissed, then swept away, his flowing robes of silk whooshing out behind him.
"If you were to ask my opinion…" A gruff voice started from behind Legolas.
The elf sighed and turned around, "I did not ask for you opinion, Gimli."
"…I would say that he needs to meet my ax, then come back and say that to you." Gimli finished, walking up to Legolas from the gate entrance. "He needs to be taught a lesson, my friend."
"That is not how we handle things here, Gimli."
"Oh you let a worm like him dishonor you right to you face, is that how you handle it?" Gimli shouted.
"No." Legolas replied firmly, "We do not get into foolish arguments with halfwits."
Gimli seemed to be thinking on this, but he was really just trying to breathe. Finally he looked at Legolas, "Fine." He growled, "Then I will be the teacher of lessons for him."
And he turned tail and stomped off, leaving Legolas to sigh and hope his dwarf friend didn't kill himself.
--
But of course, with Gimli's luck, he couldn't find Dimthuleion anywhere…
--
So, a few days went by, and Gimli finally had the chance to meet the epitome of Mirkwood's Royal Family.
Vebor.
"BROTHER!"
Legolas and Gimli had been walking in the garden, arguing about this and that, when the voice of the dubbed 'disgrace of the elves' rang out behind them.
Gimli jumped and turned around with a snort, glaring at the on comer. He recognized Vebor as the laughing elf he had sat beside in the feast days before.
Always the gentleman, Legolas smiled upon Vebor's approach, "Vebor! Gimli, have you met Vebor?"
Vebor rocked back on his heels, "Sat next to him at the feast. Very messy eater. He uses his beard as a napkin." He giggled.
Raising his brows, Gimli looked at Legolas and frowned when he saw his friend laughing. "This is Vebor, Gimli. He's my adopted brother."
Gimli smiled awkwardly and shook Vebor's hand, which the elf promptly sneezed on. Which was odd really, Gimli didn't think elves sneezed very often, or at all for that matter…
"Good to meet you, Vebor." Gimli said, trying to get his mind off of elvish sneezing.
Vebor released Gimli's hand, "I came from daisies!"
Gimli was relieved to see that not even Legolas understood this comment, and they both stared helplessly at Vebor until Calen came running up through the archway and into the garden.
Her blonde hair was wild and her face was flushed from running and she sighed when she saw her cousins. Picking up her skirt, she ran over to them, "There you are!" she smiled at Vebor, and glanced at Legolas and Gimli.
Gimli made a point to stand up a little straighter.
"Come on Veebes, we've got a date, remember?" Calen laughed, linking arms with Vebor.
Vebor looked at Calen with wide, excited eyes and pointed at Legolas with his free hand, "Look Calen! I found Legolas!"
"Spot on Vebor! We've been looking everywhere for him…" Calen replied, smiling at Legolas.
Legolas winked at her and smiled back, "Go on Vebor. Go with Calen."
Vebor gave his brother and Gimli a grin and let Calen walk him off towards the forest, "We're going to find llamas!!" Vebor cried over his shoulder as they left.
-
"Ouch! Legolas watch where you're pointing that thing!"
"Calen, I know what I'm doing, if you'd let go of it for moment.."
"If you were to ask my opinion-"
"We didn't."
"Careful!! It's sharp!"
"Hm…it's a lot longer than it looks from far away."
"Yes well, it's a very dangerous weapon if you know how to use it. The size really doesn't make a difference, you just have to know how to properly shoot."
"Don't you just aim and pull really hard?"
"There's more to it than that Calen."
Calen rolled her eyes and snatched the bow from her cousin, giving him an easy smile, "It can't be that difficult." She said matter-of-factly, then pulled an arrow from the quiver that was slung over her shoulder.
It was mid-day on the eighth day since Legolas returned home and he'd finally agreed to give Calen the archery lesson she'd been pestering him about since she could walk.
Calen had complained the entire time thus far.
First of all, Legolas had them (Gimli tagged along, uninvited) walk deep into the woods just incase Calen decided she'd try to aim for King Thranduil's royal advisor or some other unsuspecting elf, and she'd complained about that.
She'd complained that she hadn't gotten to use the bow Legolas had been given by Galadriel. She'd complained that Legolas was being too bossy and wasn't letting her try it.
She'd been a pain in the ass, pretty much.
But for some strange reason, Gimli found himself all the more attracted to her.
Anyway, after giving her all the instruction she would allow, Legolas took a few steps back, and gave up teaching for the day. He wasn't going to help her anymore, unless she asked. Even if she was holding the bow upside down.
Wasn't going to help.
Not at all.
Silence.
Not a word.
No helping.
He couldn't stand it.
"Calen you've got the bow upside down!" Legolas yelled, just as Calen's arrow shot off, with surprising momentum, into the woods.
The three of them watched the arrow speed off into the woods, Gimli very proud of himself for watching at a safe distance, Calen very proud of herself for making the arrow 'go', and Legolas with his hands over his eyes hoping that the arrow didn't hit anything.
With a satisfied grin, Calen turned to her cousin with her nose in the air, "I think I've proven my point."
Gimli couldn't help it, "What was your point?" he asked.
"What was my point!?" Calen repeated with a huff, turning to glare at the dwarf.
Gimli and Legolas blinked at her, waiting her response.
Calen looked from one of them to the other, then whipped out another arrow, "I'll do it again."
She looked indignantly at Legolas and turned the bow over before loading the arrow.
"Lets hope she doesn't kill anyone.." Legolas muttered to Gimli as they stepped back, watching her.
And just as she was letting go of the arrow.
"Darling!" Dimthuleion exclaimed, appearing seemingly out of nowhere and smiling at Calen.
"DAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
--
King Thranduil narrowed his eyes at his niece. "And where did you say the arrow hit him?"
Calen lowered her eyes, her pointed ears burning with embarrassment. She was standing in front of her uncle's throne with Legolas and Gimli to her side. It was assured the Dimthuleion was going to live, but he was very upset for the injury and kept grumbling something about an attempted assassination on his life.
"Well…sort of on…the upper thigh, your grace…"
Gimli hid his laughter with a clearing of his throat and made his smile vanish, "Pardon me, your majesty, but I'm afraid the arrow pierced his ass."
The King blinked, but dismissed Gimli's crude use of words as 'a dwarf thing'. "Oh did it?" he mused, smiling slightly.
Legolas frowned, not believing his father was smiling over this matter, but couldn't help but smile himself, "Father.." he warned.
Thranduil's grin vanished but laughter remained in his eyes as he nodded to Calen. "The wedding must be postponed then, dear."
"That's what I've come to ask you about. Dimthuleion wishes it pushed back a month at least, until he is fully healed." Calen requested, after giving them all repressive glares, hiding her own laughter quite well.
"A month?" The King repeated, surprised. "A month it takes to heal a wound…of this magnitude?"
Gimli and Legolas snickered.
Calen glared at them, then turned back to the King with stern eyes, "Yes, your highness. A month."
Thranduil smiled to his niece, "Very well.."
--
"TAKE IT OUT!! TAKE IT OUT!!! CALEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNN!!!!!"
"Hold still Vebor, it's only a splinter." Calen laughed, holding down Vebor as he squirmed. Her balcony was suddenly where every passing elf was looking as Vebor struggled against Calen as she tried to take the splinter out of his finger.
"Noooo…." Vebor cried, his lip poking out childlike.
Calen pulled out the splinter and smiled at him, "There. Fixed. See that wasn't so bad."
Vebor was still whimpering when Legolas walked onto the balcony, his eyebrow raised, curious of the commotion.
"You wouldn't be climbing anymore trees for quite some time, will you?" Calen said with a slight laugh, waving as she spotted Legolas at the door.
"What's going on up here?" Legolas asked, walking over to Calen and Vebor's chairs.
Vebor stood up and shoved his finger in Legolas' face. "I have a little prick!"
Legolas blinked, "You do?"
"Well, it's gone now. Calen fixed it." Vebor answered, dropping his hand to his side. He spotted King Thranduil walking on the path below them and ran over to the balcony edge to talk to him.
Calen smiled at Legolas as he sat down next to her.
"How's Dim?"
She frowned at him for using Dimthuleion's nickname, but shrugged it off. "Traumatized. I don't know how he'll go on."
Legolas laughed, "Has he cancelled the wedding for good now?"
Sighing, Calen leaned back in her chair, "Not yet…"
Then they both jumped up when they saw Vebor put one leg over the balcony railing.