A/N- This chapter is very fresh- as I wrote most of it tonight... I didn't like the two chapters I had originally as it didn't seem to fit into the storyline as much as I thought it had. However, this chapter I feel fits their reunion much better. Please leave your thoughts...
Chapter 43
Location: Naberrie Residence, Imperial Center
Month 2 Day 1 Year 27 BBY
Padme rubs her eyes tiredly. She had been scourging over the files again on both transfers from Rush's computer. There are literally tens of thousands of files on her datapad to go through. She and Ashoka had worked on mainly encrypted files over the past two months in some of their spare time. Ashoka mainly worked on the encrypted files and allowed Padme' to read through them on her own. She didn't want to read them or watch them. She had made that mistake when she had opened one such holo file. The holofile was a file of Rush with his mistress having sex on his desk in his personal office at the penthouse. Apparently Rush liked videoing himself with her. Since then Ashoka has sworn to not open any holo files and Padme' could do that all herself which had taken twice as long, since Padme' had to go through them herself.
She hadn't been successful in finding out too much other than what he spent on his lavish mistress, Corde' and his business trips back and forth from Scipio. Nothing out of the ordinary, but she'd wait for confirmation now to find the information she needed to prove that Rush had ordered the death of her and her daughter.
She sighs eyeing the legislative bills about insignificant things. Most of these bills hadn't passed the Senate and the work and wording had to be read very carefully. Padme' enjoyed reading legislative bills that came through Bail's office- but she does that during the week- all day and to have to search through past bills is dull and boring. She enjoys her new intern position with Bail. She has been able to shadow him on many occasions in the Senate. Some days the action is incredible- and others she has to drink a cafe' to stay awake. And now she could use some cafe'.
She stands to her feet and eyes the cafe' pot. She grabs it and slides the liquid into a mug and turns her eyes back to the datapad. She thumbs through another bill and notices a change in the document dated from a year prior. Her lips sip the hot liquid as she reads the document in more detail.
The Empire requests funding for a personal project by the Empire. The Project includes the needed materials, durasteel, at least ten thousand builders, data parts, wires, coil.
The exceedingly long list continues on. But she continues to read it until she eyes the words under the last sentence. The Emperor seeks approval of funding by the Intergalactic Banking Clan. The Senate needs to have a committee check over the specs of this personal project for the Emperor before funding can be distributed and approved.
The name of the life form who signed the document catches her eye. Senator Rush Clovis.
Had someone blackmailed Rush over a project that he didn't approve of? If so then someone very high up had done the blackmailing. But who? Her mind searches for a connection and the beeping of her entrance panel catches her attention.
Who could be out at this hour? She eyes the time. 2300. It's late even to her, though tomorrow is not a work day. She switches the datapad off and sighs. She knows she won't be getting any work done tonight.
Her feet pad to her doorway and she presses the panel and sees the large form of her best friend staring down at her.
" Hey there stranger," comes an all too well known voice.
Her gaze flickers to those azure eyes she knows like her own soul. His chiseled features form that ridiculous grin she is used to seeing.
Her eyes blink back in surprise at seeing him in the flesh. It has been two months since she last saw his face. The night they had argued plays in the back of her mind. She also had been avoiding him at all costs since his release. She didn't know how to apologize for what had transpired that night. It had ripped her up inside knowing that he pushed her away as he had
And then out of protection for her sake, had gotten himself arrested. The guilt had eaten her alive for these many months.
" Hi-" She manages while her heart pounds in her ears.
She eyes the red bag in his hand and he peers into the apartment. " Can I come in?"
She swallows thickly and turns to the side to allow him to come in. She keeps her back to him, and tries to calm the nerves wrecking within her. She knew they needed to speak of many unspoken things, but now wasn't the time to speak of those things. Now she needed to try to get through one awkward meeting with her best friend and inquire about his well being. Ben had told her about the state he had been in when Admiral Jinn had picked him up for release.
As she tries to calm her thudding heart, Anakin's gaze sweeps over her apartment. The walls are decorated with paintings from Naboo, scenes from their childhood. Pictures of family line the walls as well.
The golden sofa seems to stick out within the blues and greens of the walls and paintings. There's a small round hazel cafe' table near the sofa. There's also a small holo on the wall.
His gaze sweeps to the dining room table and he places the bag he brought with him.
In his mind, he had played out what he wanted to say tonight. In his mind, they'd chit-chat over a bit of whisky and Nabooian food from her favorite restaurant close to the Senate building. In his mind, the night would be smoothed over by a bit of alcohol and laughter. He'd apologize for being an ass the night before he was arrested. He'd apologize for keeping away for an extra week, but he didn't know what to say. He had wanted to be close to her the day of his release, but with the news of his parentage hanging over his head, and just being back in the normal world was enough to exhaust him. He felt guilty for not telling her the truth and admitting what they both already know. He had pushed her away and now he didn't want to. But that would be another visit. Right now, he just needs time with his best friend alone.
The silence looms over them. She turns back to him and gestures to the bag, smelling the delicate aromas coming from the bag. She knows it's her favorite Sharru-T steak with onions and shuraa fruit sauce. " Should we eat before it gets cold?"
The side grin appears once more on his features and he says awkwardly, " Sure."
He pulls out the Corniellian whisky and she chuckles through her nerves. Thank the Force he brought some booze. I need it to have this conversation.
She goes to the kitchen and grabs two large cafe' mugs and his eyebrow raises in interest.
He hands him the blue mug and suggests, " It holds more."
He takes the clear glass bottle and pours both of their mugs to the brim. She smiles and takes it gladly, sipping a very large amount without speaking. They stay like this for a time as he unpacks the food and they get their utensils.
Padme' plops down on her sofa with her mug and tray of steaming hot food. She sniffs it gratefully. He knows what she likes. The sofa sinks on the right side as his own weight put onto the sofa cushion.
She gingerly takes a forkful of already cut up steak. The steak is cooked with a slight pink in the middle. The onions are mixed on the tray with the meat and the delicate shuraa sauce is purple in color on her plate.
Anakin doesn't take a bite, but comments, " I like your place. It's homey."
She nods as she swallows her bit and sips a bit of her whisky. Small chit-chat is exactly what is needed before ranging into the guilt eating at her. He takes a few small bites and tries to have an appetite for the food in front of him, but with the silence brewing steadily between them, he isn't sure if small chit-chat is going to be smooth sailing. Perhaps it had been a bad idea to come tonight.
She notices his picking at his food and asks, " Is something wrong with your steak?"
He shines at a small smile at her and replies, " No, just not too hungry."
She sips her drink in thought. He matches her pace with her drinking as well. It seemed he knew as well for whatever he desired to say needs to be with a bit of a sway of a buzz. Padme' cannot quite feel the buzz yet, but can feel the warmth forming in her belly from the liquor. She hadn't touched this whisky since the time she'd gotten drunk at his going away party. She had sworn off that liquor as it was a reminder of him and too painful to think about at the time. Now, it's a simple reminder of the first time they had drank and gotten drunk together.
She smiles softly murmuring, " I remember the first time I tasted this liquor."
His eyes find her brown ones as the memories of that day come flooding back. He chuckles, " Yes, we stole your father's best Cornellian Brand Whisky that had aged 25 years and drank the whole bottle by ourselves."
She chuckles, " Yes, I remember sitting on my bed and watching the world spin so hard. But after I had that near death experience- I figured it was okay to get drunk at 13."
He nods in agreement. " I don't think I've seen you any drunker than that night."
She wags her finger in the air and comments, " I don't know about that. The last time I touched this stuff was the night of your going away party. I was pretty hung over the next morning."
There is a flash of that night in the front of his mind. Of her wet brown curls and makeup ruined from crying and the rain. He hadn't thought of that night in awhile- at least since his imprisonment.
" Why haven't you drank this brand since that night?" He questions out of curiosity
She takes another sip and murmurs, " At the time, it was too painful to be reminded of you. Now? I just remember the awful two hangovers I had."
He takes a large swig of the drink and puts the food down. He knows he won't be eating anymore tonight. She notices this and comments, " You don't seem to have an appetite anymore. Did the prison food destroy your large appetite?"
He takes another large swig and his mug is empty. He calls within the force to bring the bottle of whisky to his left hand. He opens the bottle and pours himself another mug full. He takes another large gulp and states, " Perhaps- or it has more to do with that I need to apologize to you."
Padme' takes another sip of her drink and shakes her head in agreement. " Yes, you do owe me an apology but I owe you one too."
He takes another swig and replies, " That night I went after Rush, I wasn't thinking of anything other than keeping you safe. I was arrogant and I'm sorry rushing ahead and taking my rage out of that son of a bitch. I- just wanted him to pay for how he's treated you. The fact that he thought you might come crawling back was sickening."
She takes his hand in hers and squeezes it tightly. " Anakin- you were only trying to protect me. I forgive you."
He stares back at her without blinking. She had forgiven him so easily. How had he thought this would be so hard to speak about? But then he senses the guilt eating at her force aura. He knows she feels responsible for his arrest.
" P- there's nothing to apologize for. It was my decision." He answers to her without thinking it through.
She bites her red lips and replies, " I feel guilty because if I had just talked to you, maybe you wouldn't have gone after him. You were arrested because you were trying to protect me- as my friend."
His eyes flicker to his cup and he dismisses, " Don't apologize for that. You've always been your own person and I- should have listened to you. I could have been more of an asset out of prison, instead of 10 weeks of lockup."
She adds, " But I'm also apologizing for pushing you that night to talk about what had occurred during our meditation. It wasn't the time to speak of such things- and I wasn't in the right place to even pry to what I had witnessed. You hadn't wanted me to see those images and I shouldn't have pried in such a way. As your friend, it was wrong of me."
He swallows thickly, listening to her apology. He watches her brown eyes display the guilt she'd been holding onto for those past ten weeks. He takes another swig of his drink as he listens and at the end he squeezes her hand and murmurs, " No P- I should have just told you the truth. But I didn't back then because I knew we had futures apart and Katrina was right- I wasn't right for you."
Her eyes hold his as he responds to her comment. She bites her lip murmuring, " You know I was in love with you too, right?"
His adam's apple shows the hard swallow he has taken of the liquor. He's glad the beginnings of a buzz are beginning to show. His body is somewhat relaxing even with their emotional release. He murmurs, " I wasn't sure how you had felt at the time. All I knew was a life of waiting on a soldier wasn't one I wanted you to have. I wanted you to have your dreams of becoming a Senator and not stand in your way."
She laughs dryly. " And look where that got us?"
He comments, " You're studying to become a Senator, are you not?"
She smiles sadly and mutters, " Yes, and almost divorced at 19. How successful does that sound?"
He asks, " When is your divorced finalized?"
She sighs and mutters, " It should have been finalized a few weeks ago, but Rush wants to fight over properties on Naboo that were given to me. I just want the land that father gave to us on the island. The cabin at Lake Varykino was a wedding gift. I don't care about the small estate of my grandmother's that I inherited from my mother. I've never been there so it doesn't hold memories like the cabin does."
Anakin nods watching her and listening to her. The awkwardness fades away with each stroke of her speech, but at the same time a stroke of his damaged heart falls away as well. He had heard her usage of the past tense when speaking of being in love with him. He knows she'll probably never give her heart again to another man- not after what Rush did to her. He'd be surprised if she ever bedded another man after what he did as well.
" I would think after I beat him to a pulp that he'd try to have a smooth divorce with you." He mutters with a hint of anger.
She pours herself another glass of whisky and snorts. " I think a part of him is still wishing I'd come back to him, which isn't going to happen."
He smiles into his mug and leans comfortably into her soft couch. She notices his force aura becoming more relaxed even though she had heard the anger in his voice a moment ago. The whisky worked fast as she has felt a bit lightheaded for a few minutes now.
She leans her own body against the couch as he states, " I'm glad to see you happier without him."
She nods and states, " I am happier. My internship is going well , and I really enjoy sparring with Ashoka every week. It's also good to have you back."
He smiles at her and nods, " It's good to be back."
She takes another sip of her drink and asks, " What was it like? If you don't mind me asking."
He lifts his eyes to hers. Blue on brown. " In prison? P-you don't want to hear about that."
She nods, hearing the hint of defensiveness in his voice. She questions, " What got you through those long days and nights? I mean something or someone must have gotten you through it."
His eyes peer away from hers. He sips his drink in silence as he tries to think of what to say. Should he tell her the truth? That every memory they had, had floated in his mind. That she was the reason for his determination to make it through every interrogation and every night alone in that dark dank cell.
The look in her eyes tells him she should know the truth. He whispers, " I thought about you- how much I'd give to see you one last time. How much I-" He stops himself from finishing his sentence.
She blinks hearing those words slip out of his mouth. He had almost admitted that he still loves me. She says nothing- lost in her own thoughts.
Anakin eyes the time on the wall. It had been an hour since he had arrived and he had come and said what he needed too. He needed to leave before he slipped up again and told her the truth- that his feelings for her were still as strong as they were back then.
He places the mug down on the cafe' table and his mood changes suddenly. He announces, " It's late and I think it's time for me to go."
Padme' blinks away the fog of her thoughts and notices him closing up his food that he had barely touched. She reaches for him then, not thinking about anything other than his almost admittances. She didn't want him to leave. He had just gotten back from prison.
She states clearly, " Anakin- please don't leave things like this."
He smiles at her and says, " I came to say what I needed to say. How bout we try to have lunch in a few days?"
She reaches for him and grabs his hand. " Ani- please don't change the subject and leave like this. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable."
His smile fades at her pleadings. He stands up and mutters, " It's better if I leave now before I say things that I shouldn't say."
She stands as well and states, " Remember we made a promise to each other to tell each other everything, even if the truth makes us feel uncomfortable. I don't see how this is any different."
He runs his hands through his golden locks. He says softly, " P- please just let me go home and pretend this conversation is over."
She scoffs, " Why?"
He repeats again, " P, please just forget it." He turns his back to her and begins to gather his things to leave. He's got a buzz, but not enough to handle this conversation which could easily bleed over into an argument.
She nods not accepting his cowardly answer. Her eyes narrow and she can sense her anger at his cowardice as he tries to leave. " Why can't you just admit that you still are in love with me?"
To Be Continued...