The sun rose for the first time in Goku Black's misanthropic reality displacement. Still feeling groggy, the Saiyan woke up from his slumber. He had completely failed to consider his shelter situation as he was accustomed to the wooden cabin he and Zamasu had. The cave and haystack he found in the training woods overnight were not the worst things in the world but his situation could be much better. To make matters worse, his exquisite robes were all dirtied up! Annoyed, Black detonated the cave and flew up towards the newly lit blue skies. At least he still had his tea, even if the tea set was a bit filthy.
The situation was becoming dire for Project Zero Mortals. Having to rediscover all his locked powers was already an arduous task on its own but Black completely failed to consider one of a Saiyan's most valuable commodities: rest. Black then closed his eyes, looking for answers to his new pseudo-mortal life.
Come to think of it, it's impossible for Goku and Vegeta to fight at all times, Black thought. The Saiyan body, with as much power it contained, still had anatomical limits. Vegeta, being married into the wealthiest family on Earth had no need to worry about a quality place to stay. For Goku, as Black understood, still had a cozy place where he was comfortable with his wife and child. Much like how this body craves for battle, it craves for proper care and maintenance as well, the Saiyan deduced.
Black opened his eyes, with a much better focus and understanding. Getting a place to rest would lead to more opportunities to get power, power that will be used to fuel Project Zero Mortals. This reasoning seemed logical enough to quell some of the Saiyan's frustrations. But where would he even get a home? There were definitely not enough trees and resources to reconstruct the cabin he was used to. He was going to have to revisit the library again.
Remembering to get his tea, Black exercised his telekinetic powers to retrieve them, satisfied he could still pull it off even if it was not as easy as before. Placing two fingers on his forehead, Black found the same alleyway he used to leave the town yesterday. In less than a moment, Black arrived just as expected and made his way to the library once more.
Making his way to the computer lab, the Saiyan turned on the computer like how that 'Mirio' did. Fortunately this time, there would be no mortal making horrible jokes next to him. Opening the browser, he searched for 'How to get a home?'
To his surprise, he found that the process was significantly more challenging than he anticipated. There were thousands of websites telling him about the process, all of which had very different details. As if that wasn't enough, even the cheapest apartment was significantly higher than the 4600 yen green tea he had, which he thought was already expensive.
"Now how do I earn MONEY," Black demanded, slamming his fist to the computer table again. Once again, there was laughter adjacent to him.
"Mama, why does he not know how to earn money?" a small child nearby asked, pointing his finger at the Saiyan. "Does he not have a job?"
"I don't know but look at him," his mother began to explain. "Looking at how he acts and how tattered his clothes are, he clearly did not make the most of himself in life. If you study hard, you won't end up like him."
Black stared at the two in furious disbelief, even though the two had no idea of his thoughts. To be seen so lowly by mortals! The Saiyan had never seen such a blasphemous attack against him before, not even when he first saw Super Saiyan Blue Goku on Godtube. Blood boiling, Black stared at his computer screen again, remembering his overarching plans for Project Zero Mortals.
The boy said something about 'jobs,' Black reflected. Those did seem to be things that people in his old universe had. Making another search, Black began his job hunt.
Somehow the job hunt looked even harder than the hunt for a home. There were uncountable amounts of jobs, which all had qualifications Black had no way of obtaining. Scrolling more and more, Black finally found a job requiring no qualifications.
Hopper's Cafe in East Naruhata, huh, Black thought. A job posting for a dishwasher at 650 yen an hour for a popular cat cafe would usually not interest him in the slightest. However, weighing all of his other options, Black sighed and accepted that this would be his only chance at employment. This is absolutely embarrassing for a god.
Through gritted teeth, Black made his last search for directions to East Naruhata from the library. Memorizing the map, he turned off the computer and headed out, tea in hand of course.
After heading back into the secluded alleyway, Black shot up in the air and flew towards the cafe at breakneck speed.
"Oi, Ichiro," Jiro Hotta called out to his twin, stunned at the scene he was viewing outside the window. "You're not gonna believe this."
A giant, serpentine villain was in the town, making a huge path of destruction in its path. The destruction looked absolutely indiscriminate; no man, woman, or child was safe from its wrath.
Jiro Hotta looked at the scene, although with a more decided look. This wasn't the first time Naruhata had a villain attack, especially as many of their own employees were once villains themselves. Nevertheless, with The Cruller gone, he knew that people like him had to protect the town in place of the vigilante gone hero abroad.
"We fight back, duh," Ichiro announced with his usual eloquent rhetoric. "Let's transform and get this guy done with."
Jiro nodded and stopped mindlessly staring at the window. The two twins grew new features until they resembled nothing but gigantic grasshoppers. Leaving the cafe, the two taunted the villain.
"You messed with the wrong city, fool!" Ichiro yelled, preparing an all-out fistfight.
"Hotta kick!" Jiro screamed, landing a massive kick on the serpent's spine.
Much to the Hottas' misfortune, the red serpent simply shrugged the injuries off. Giving yet another massive roar, this time, it gave its undivided attention to the grasshopper brothers.
"Oh crap, what do we do now?" Jiro wondered, feeling unease by the villain.
"No idea, but we're still gonna have to fight!" Ichiro answered with a hint of uncertainty in his voice. If only Takobe or Kamachi were here today. Guess they earned their time off though.
Suddenly, from the air, a loud whoosh sound descended upon the Naruhata residents and onto the serpent's head. Goku Black appeared before them, defeating the serpentine villain with one, swift, powerful blow. The Saiyan felt absolute disgust at having to land on top of such a terrible creature as well as share the world with insect people like the two in front of him.
"Wow, you did great there!" Jiro congratulated, having never seen such power before.
"It's like All Might himself trained you, dude!" Ichiro added on, giving praise he's rarely ever given.
Black ignored their praise, still fixated on his goal in mind.
"Where's Hopper's Cafe?" Black asked.
"Oh, it's right down the corner," Jiro replied. "We're the owners, actually!"
The two brothers reverted back to their human forms to properly greet the Saiyan.
"I'm Ichiro Hotta and this is my twin brother, Jiro," Ichiro explained. "Pleasure to meet you!"
He extended his arm for a handshake. Noticing Black's discomfort, he put his hand back.
"And I'm Goku," the Saiyan responded.
"So, what's interested you here out in Naruhata?" Jiro asked. "Would you like to get a drink from our cafe?"
"I believe that your cafe was open to employment," the Saiyan responded. He was holding himself back from not annihilating the town on spot. "A 'dishwasher' position, if I was not mistaken."
The Hotta brothers couldn't believe what they were hearing. A man as powerful as this just wanted to have a job as a mere dishwasher?
"You're hired," Ichiro said immediately.
Black looked back, confused, angry, and a bit relieved. Well, that was far easier than I thought.
"We can get you started if you're not busy right now," Jiro offered.
"Yes, I would like to commence with my work as soon as I can," Black replied, satisfied that things were going into motion the way he wanted.
The trio walked to the cafe, where the Saiyan was shown around the premises. By human standards, it was a spacious cafe with plenty of room for man and feline alike.
What a ridiculous business premise, was all Black could think of upon exploring the place.
"So here's our kitchen!" Jiro explained, pointing to a large room full of many plates, cooking utensils, and sinks. "As a dishwasher, you'll be doing your work over there."
He pointed to a corner of the room with a kitchen sink.
"That's where the dishes will be done," Ichiro said. "Got any questions?"
Black took a moment to think. The job sounded easy enough. If it would help him get the money he needed, he supposed that he would cooperate for now.
"I'll be good, thank you," Black replied.
"Great!" Ichiro said. "So the pay will be 650 yen an hour, 8 hours from Monday to Friday, and meals will be free. We don't really have much to do today other than clean up after that snake guy made a mess but you can go off and come back tomorrow for work!"
The Saiyan kept his usual scowl, unsure of what he could do. He could try to hunt for those top heroes right away but without a real place to rest, his body would give out at some point. He then voiced his concern.
"I'm still quite new here," Black explained. "I don't really have a home to stay in."
The Hotta brothers looked at each other and nodded. There was something they could pull off.
"Well, we got some room in our basement," Jiro offered. "You could stay down there until you have enough to move out."
The Saiyan's ears perked at the sound of this offer. Even if it was filthier than his old cabin, it had to be more comfortable than sleeping outdoors.
"Alright, let's see how it is," Black replied, feeling more relieved that his plan was moving smoother than he had anticipated.
The trio walked down to the basement and turned on the lights. It was full of various other supplies for the business such as new plates, food ingredients, and cat toys. The brothers took Black all the way to the back of the basement to a door. Unlocking the door, the brothers introduced Black to his new living quarters.
"And there we go!" Jiro said. "You got a place to live now!"
In front of them was a small, empty room. While more promising than the cave, it didn't seem to provide everything needed in a home.
"Hmm," Ichiro thought, inspecting Black's tattered look. "While we could always get some furniture here, what are we gonna do about cleaning him up?"
"Well, there's a swimming pool pretty close by," Jiro responded. "He could shower there by the lockers. There's also a laundromat right next to it so he could get his clothes done there too."
"This will be fine, thank you," Black said through gritted teeth, still trying to use his politeness from his time as Gowasu's apprentice.
"No worries!" Ichiro said. "We'll let you out of your hair. You can come up to use the bathroom, and you can also use a large cat bed for now. Enjoy your stay!"
Black followed the two back up the stairs, feeling extremely unstimulated from the lack of activities to do. As the trio arrived back into the main room of the cafe, the door opened.
"Huh, business is doing well," the man said sarcastically. He was a very unkempt man, wearing black that matched his long, black hair and a gray scarf.
"Ah, Aizawa!" Ichiro eagerly said. "Long time no see, man!"
"We're kinda doin' maintenance at the moment!" Jiro chimed in.
"So, how's teaching at UA?" Ichiro asked.
"Oh, well, it's alright, I suppose," Aizawa replied. "There are times where I feel like I would rather fight some villains, though. The admissions exam is coming soon up so I guess I'll see if I'll have to expel the new class the day they get on campus."
Ichiro gave a hearty laugh, happy that his old friend is acting as cold as always. The two sat down at a table.
"Hey Goku, why don't you make him some coffee," Ichiro said.
"Ichiro, he's new!" Jiro said, wanting to save a bit of face.
"Oh, alright, how about you?" Ichiro said to Jiro.
"Oh, alright, fine," Jiro replied with slight annoyance.
"Actually, Goku, why don't you join us with our little chat," Ichiro offered.
Goku Black walked to the square table and sat with Aizawa to his left and Ichiro to his right.
"So this is our new dishwasher, Goku," Ichiro explained. "And Goku, this is Shota Aizawa, UA teacher and Pro Hero, Eraserhead!"
A hero, huh, Black thought, having unexpectedly come across a treasure trove of resources. I don't remember seeing him anywhere in my research but perhaps he could be of some use to me, even if it's only for a moment.
"A pleasure to meet for your acquaintance," Black introduced, still using false-politeness.
Aizawa just nodded, accepting the introduction. Ichiro carried the conversation on.
"Ya know that snake guy who just popped up?" he explained. "Well this Goku guy just popped up from the sky and practically flattened him! It was incredible!"
"Ah, that was why I was sent here, actually," Aizawa replied, getting more curious about Black. "Luckily, the police sent adequate forces this time so there wasn't much that I needed to do."
"U...A," Black muttered out loud. He saw something about that with All Might and Endeavor but he couldn't remember what was so significant about it.
"Oh, you got something to say about UA, Goku?" Ichiro asked Black, enjoying the conversation.
"Yeah, I do," Black responded. "What is 'UA'?"
Ichiro fell back in his chair in comical fashion and Aizawa widened his eyes by a small amount. UA was practically common knowledge and he didn't know what it was?
"UA is a secondary school in Musutafu," Aizawa started to explain, ignoring Ichiro clumsily getting back in his chair. "I happen to teach the Hero course."
"Yeah, dude, how do you now know this?" Ichiro asked, still surprised. "It's like the best hero school out there!"
The best, huh, Black thought. I knew those 'UA' letters felt familiar; All Might and Endeavor went to this school! The Saiyan sought more information about this UA school.
"And what do these students learn in that course?" Black asked, yearning for more knowledge.
"In three years' time, our students are expected to have gained enough insight to perform activities expected of a Pro," the teacher responded, still in disbelief at the situation he was in now. "Students are prepared for anything ranging from combat, support, and rescue just to name a few things."
"So what do they do for combat?" Black asked, his body itching for a decent fight.
"Hey, you're kinda into this fight business," Ichiro said to Black. "What are you trying to do, go toe-to-toe with a pro?" He laughed and slapped the Saiyan's back, much to his awkwardness.
"In any case, students are to further develop their quirks and use them when the situation arises," Aizawa said, noting Black's curiosity into combat. "Our students are very resilient and will put a stop to whatever is seen as a threat."
Whatever is seen as a threat, huh, Black thought amidst his inner cackling for Project Zero Mortals and his divine powers. These mortals really are as naive as they are stupid.
"I see," Black said, smiling and closing his eyes. "Thank you very much for this valuable information."
"Alright, I brought the coffee right here!" Jiro said, with two cups of coffee in his hands. He gave one to Aizawa and Ichiro, leaving Black empty-handed.
"Ah, sorry Goku," the brewer said. "I'll get you some now!"
"No need," the Saiyan replied, with actual politeness this time. "I still got my tea leaves."
"Oh, alright," Jiro said, joining in on the chat.
The group chatted about various miscellaneous things, such as their old escapades against this apparently monstrous 'Number 6' as well as 'The Cruller/Crawler.' Black kept silent throughout it all.
"Well in any case, it's getting a bit late now so I'll go back on patrol," Aizawa said. "Nice catching up here."
"Come back anytime!" the brothers said in unison.
Black looked at him, with a new interest in heroes.
Well, I suppose there will be nice appetizers before I commence with the main course.
Author's note: So there's the chapter! Very slice-of-life I think. Goku Black does seem kinda dumb but I had it in mind with his pre-existing knowledge of the universe, his time as a deity, and his extreme hatred of mortals. So with that in mind, I reasoned that it made sense for him to not really know how to politely interact with humans or know much about their culture. He'll figure it out(?) And yea, I threw in some stuff from Vigilantes.
Oh, also, as for powers, Black can still use instant transmission and things like energy blasts and super strength, which again, are scaled much much lower. Although it follows anime canon, he has used telekinesis in the manga so I decided to mix some manga powers too.