Chapter 166

Dishonest

There was a growing compulsion inside Cameron to 'come clean'. She did not treat her friends as friends. She treated them as pawns and people to 'use'. Her actions were unscrupulous. There was little moral fabric in her make up. It did not leave her with a pleasant feeling.

Cameron approached Allison. She needed to tell Allison she lied to her. It bothered her greatly that she'd lied again. It was in her programming to be duplicitous to achieve her goals. It was all about winning – right?

Not THIS time.

She felt very conscientious about correcting this mistake.

There was a sense of relief as she prepared to speak.

"Allison, there is someth…." Cameron started.

Allison wanted to get something off her chest first. She cut Cameron off.

"Cameron." Allison interrupted. "I talked with Vanna and we will do it if it's the four of us together. We will both be with John and you."

Allison was glad she got that out. It was a life changing decision and she'd just made that clear to Cameron.

What Allison said was everything that Cameron wanted. She wanted to be honest before the girls made a life altering choice like that.

"Allison, I wasn't hones…." Cameron started.

Allison needed to get this out. She cut Cameron off again.

"If we did it before, then we will do it again. We decided last night." Allison interrupted again. "I just wanted you to know that."

Cameron was taken aback. She was going to confess that she hadn't been honest with Allison and lied to her. Now Allison just gave her what she wanted for so long. It was everything Future John wanted and programmed into her. It was for Allison and Vanna to be with John. It was to 'ready them' to replace her as it should be, as it was meant to be and as it MUST be. It needed to be as it was, no – is in the future. It was the 'Natural Order'.

Cameron wanted to finish what she started to say but couldn't right now. There was a massive internal conflict that raged inside of her. It was still not too late to 'take the win'. Not all victories were sweet. This would be a bitter victory built and predicated on a lie. It was more like a mountain of lies at this point.

It seemed both girls were flooded with thoughts about moving forward.

Allison wanted to be guilt free when they were with John. She needed to set down some rules and conditions.

"Tell us when and where and we will be there. You will never let yourself or us have any peace until we do this for you." Allison said. "BUT you have to be there. We have to know you will allow this and that you won't change your mind. If you can watch John 'touch us', then we will know. If you touch us, we will know. We have to know. I HAVE TO KNOW."

Cameron wanted to say she lied to Allison. In fact she started to before Allison blurted out what she said. Now she was torn. She'd won but it was with a lie, another lie. It seemed to be something she did more and more. She always won but at what cost? Was it the cost of the lives of her best friends, John's baby and even herself?

Cameron spoke with moral certitude. It was time to do the right thing. This needed to be corrected before anything moved forward, even if it prevented it from moving forward after the truth. It was time. She faced Allison.

"Allison, I lied." Cameron said.

That caught Allison off guard.

"What?" Allison asked.

There was a conscientious that overwhelmed Cameron.

"I lied to you. I lie all the time." Cameron confessed. "I can't help it. It just happens."

Allison knew she cut Cameron off twice. Cameron hadn't said much. Maybe she missed something.

"You lied about what?" Allison asked a little worried.

Cameron faced Allison. She was not content with being fallacious to Allison.

"I lied about how you – your Duplicate became pregnant." Cameron confessed.

Allison was confused.

"What?" Allison asked. "She was pregnant…."

Sarah, Riley and John Henry all confirmed that Duplicate Allison was pregnant.

Cameron was dissatisfied with her own duplicitous nature.

"It was done without love making or even sex." Cameron said. "It was an artificial conception. Just the genetic material was used. It was not administered in the traditional way."

There, she came clean. Cameron felt better but not by much. She thought it would be more of a relief than it was.

Allison looked at her. She was sure there'd been an error on Cameron's part. This did not sound like how it would be done. She would want a traditional conception for herself. That was the way it was meant to be done. There must be a mistake.

"Did you review your files?" Allison asked. "Maybe some files were corrupted or incomplete. They were transferred from Duplicate Cameron on Holly's chip."

Cameron wanted her deceitfulness and dishonesty exposed for what it was. It was time to 'pay the piper' and 'face the music'. It was time to make clear what she really was. A liar. She briefly reflected that lying was worse than stealing. When you lied you stole someone's trust. That was something more valuable than any material things.

"NO, I lied to you from the start." Cameron said. "I am a liar. I am ashamed I lied to you. Allison, please forgive me. I am not a good person. I am 'evil'."

Allison needed to think about what Cameron did earlier and what she'd done now after she'd agreed to do what Cameron wanted.

"I don't know what to say. You didn't have to tell me the truth. I would never have known." Allison said. "Thank you for being honest with me."

Cameron teared up. She'd just thrown away her 'dream' for John and Allison and Vanna to be together. She failed at her mission. She was a failure.

Allison came to Cameron. She did not like to see Cameron 'hurt' like this. She smiled at Cameron and touched her cheeks as she wiped the tears away.

"I forgive you, Cameron." Allison said. "I KNOW we both know it is what you want for John and us. WE KNOW IT."

Allison's gracious only seemed to cause Cameron additional pain inside of her. She wanted to make Allison understand her true nature.

"I'm sorry I tried to manipulate you. I'm not a good person. In fact I'm not a person at all. I'm a machine. I'm a scary robot. I'm a very scary robot and a cancer from the future." Cameron got out between sobs.

Allison tried to think of a reason that Cameron was 'confused' about it. There must be some other explanation. She did not see Cameron at all like she'd just depicted herself.

"Cameron you were with us when all this happened with our Duplicates. It was easy to mix it up. None of us was there." Allison said as she tried to comfort her. "Maybe some files were misplaced and only found now."

Allison's words dug deep into her. She didn't want an 'easy out'. She wanted the truth known.

"NO. I LIED. I knew I was lying and I did it to coerce you and manipulate you. I lied to get my way. I lied to win. I'm not worthy of your friendship. I've deceived you." Cameron sobbed. "I KNEW what I was doing. I knew it was wrong and I did it anyway."

Allison wiped some more tears away from Cameron's cheeks.

"Do you feel 'bad' about it?" Allison asked. "I mean what you did?"

Cameron felt worse than 'bad'. She felt terrible and was plagued with guilt.

"YES, that's why I told you. I started to tell you before you interrupted me. I was trying to do the right thing. I don't always need to win." Cameron said. "I don't want to lie to the people I love. I need to play fair. I need to be a better perso… - machine."

Allison viewed what Cameron did just now as strength. That took courage to do that. It took an honest person to do that.

"Isn't that what you just did? You tied to be a better person. To admit your mistake freely, especially after you got what you wanted shows integrity. THAT takes a very big 'person' to do that." Allison said. "You came clean when you did not need to. That says something about your character."

Cameron only felt ashamed of herself.

"I am unworthy." Cameron said.

Cameron looked heart broken to Allison. It was time for her to reach out and 'give back'.

"Cameron, I love you as much as I always have. No, I love you more for being honest. I love you more for thinking about Vanna and me. I know it is hardwired into you to do what you THINK needs to be done. I know you believe you are protecting John and the future. You are a better and stronger person for telling the truth, even if you don't 'win'." Allison said. "You did the right thing and that is more important."

Allison gave Cameron a warm hug and a soft kiss on her cheek.

Cameron felt confused. That was a loving gesture from Allison. Allison should hate her now.

"You don't 'hate' me?" Cameron asked.

Hate was the farthest thing away in Allison's mind when she thought of Cameron.

"Hate you? I LOVE you, Cameron." Allison said. "I LOVE YOU."

Cameron felt so ashamed.

Allison wanted to make her position clear.

"Cameron, if you were not with John and I was not with Vanna, I would want to be with you. I can think of no finer PERSON in this world than you." Allison said.

Cameron needed to hear that so much. She was a little worried that maybe Allison just said that. Maybe Allison thought she would 'hurt' her 'again'.

"Really?" Cameron asked. "Do you really mean it?"

Allison placed Cameron's hand on her neck and looked her in the eyes. She wanted Cameron to know this was the truth.

"I do." Allison said. "I love you, Cameron."

This made Cameron flashback a little.

"When I went back to the future and saved My Allison - Future Allison. I loved her, Allison." Cameron said. "The months we spent together made me love her as I knew her more and more everyday. I wanted to stay in the future with her and not give her back to Future John. I know she loved me too. I did everything I could to make her a better person and fix her health. I tried to tell myself I did it for Future John but I did it because I loved her. I love you just as much, Allison. You are what John needs, not me. That is why I broke my heart and gave My Allison back to Future John. I love every Allison I know. Both of you are special people. Allison, can you ever forgive me for 'killing you'? I've killed you twice, once by my own hand and once by my foolishness. I killed your baby, Allison. It was my fault. Can you ever forgive me?"

Allison wanted to point out it was Duplicate Cameron, not her, who was responsible for the baby and Duplicate Allison's demise. Cameron also went back to the future and prevented Future Cameron from killing Future Allison. The Cameron here now with her was not responsible for any 'Allison's death. She decided to move the discussion forward instead.

"Cameron, I will always forgive you. It is YOU who needs to forgive yourself. That is what is killing you and tearing yourself apart. You never let anything go. You blame yourself for everything that goes wrong. Everyone feels like you sometimes. It is just not ALL the time like you do. I've read your poems. I've felt like that many times but I try to move on. I try to move forward." Allison said as she hugged Cameron. "Look how much you have helped everybody here, even Riley. There is NOBODY here that is loved more than you by humans or machines. That's even with a few 'mistakes' here and there. As humans we all make mistakes and lie sometimes. You are everything to everyone. There is no other like you."

Allison looked Cameron right in her eyes.

"I love you, Cameron." Allison said as she left her player with Cameron.

'California Dreamin'' by 'The Mamas And The Papas', was the tune that played.

Allison left Cameron and went straight back to her room. She was very moved with what Cameron had just done and with her honesty.

Sitting on her dresser was a new Smith and Wesson Model 66 that Cameron hand polished to a mirror finish.

"I love you, Cameron." Allison said softly as she cried. "I LOVE YOU."

Dishonest

They don't always like the way I do things

I may be deliberately
Deceptive and duplicitous
The information I dispense
May be somewhat fallacious

The actions I take
Can be audacious
My dealings with others
May seem ungracious

To break down personal barriers
I may be flirtatious
The next minute
I can become contentious

To get things done
I must be unscrupulous
Things can't bother me
As I act without feeling conscientious

When we interact
I may be contrarious
I am dishonest as necessary
I can be very vicious

They don't always like the way I do things

Nobody