Dear Reader,

I wanted to apologize for taking so long to make an update. After the last chapter, I felt pretty close to burning out, so I took some time off (admittedly much longer than I thought I'd take) to get myself excited and refreshed again for this project.

What I found was, the longer I stayed away from writing, the harder it became to do. Despite having notes charting each beat of this story up to the end, this chapter took an astonishing three weeks to get in order. Part of the delay was doing back-and-forth "research": asking friends how they found dating in their twenties and then reflecting how their experiences mirrored my own. When it came to writing it all down, I grew obsessed with things needing to be perfect and authentic.

It wasn't until recently that I tried writing for the fun of it, and the past few days have been just that. It's been breezier, and I hope to get you folks more regular updates. I sincerely hope you enjoy this chapter.

Until next time,
ApolloThirteen

What few dates Nishinoya had been on happened when he was in college. He met up with other students who were also strapped for cash; thus, the hangouts were always of inexpensive taste like grabbing coffee or going to the movies on cheaper days of the week. Furthermore, it was mutually agreed that the dates were just a courtesy—litmus tests that confirmed neither person was some sort of deranged serial killer before they hooked up in someone's dorm or in the back seat of a car.

So after graduating and moving downtown, Nishinoya figured then would be the time to explore a more substantial romance with someone. He began his search for love by downloading several dating apps, as per a co-workers' advice about "casting a wide net." Over six months, he met a total of four boys. All of them dressed up rather fancy, as did the restaurants they suggested for the first date—with all the glamor of excessive silverware and difficult-to-pronounce menu items. It was a stark change of pace from college dating, though Nishinoya surmised that such was the norm for dating in one's twenties.

But then the actual dates happened. Gone were the modest discussions, finding camaraderie in anxiously maintaining GPAs or charting career paths. These yuppie city boys were eager to flaunt the success of their lives through tall tales of exotic vacations, extravagant parties, and indulgent shopping sprees. Nishinoya hadn't much to contribute to those discussions, being a recent college grad and ambulance worker—and whenever he tried steering the conversations towards less self-obsessed topics like global warming or politics, the other boy seemed reluctant to engage. Disheartened by the whole affair, Nishinoya resigned to smile and nod politely through dessert.

So when it came to dating Hinata, Nishinoya was terrified. When choosing a place to meet, Nishinoya suggested one of his favorite pubs, perhaps the fanciest he knew, given the washrooms had complimentary mouthwash for guests. Strolling through the park after dinner wasn't planned, and if it were with any other guy, Nishinoya wouldn't have suggested it—he simply had confessions he needed to make, and figured the park would offer the privacy to do so. Then the two of them kissed. After, they agreed to keep going on dates as friends getting to know each other as potential romantic partners. They met up in several more restaurants following that night at the park. Much to Nishinoya's relief, Hinata was pretty easy-going about where they ate—if anything, the boy also had a thing for smaller, more casual dining establishments located in odd ends of the city. Their dates took them from tacos on rooftop patios to pizzerias tucked away in quiet alleys, picnics of take-out chow mein in the park, and gyro wraps in a small Greektown corner shop. Sometimes they found themselves sitting shoulder-to-shoulder amidst a maddening dinner rush. Other times, they would revel in emptier dining rooms, filling the air with the sound of their own laughter. Every time they met, the food was delicious, and their conversations sparked with both humor and sincerity. They remained in touch long after the date ended over text and social media. If ever a discussion seemed to end, neither boy would hesitate to reignite things by sharing a detail from their day, no matter how mundane or trivial it seemed.

It was only a matter of time before Azumane caught wind of what was happening, particularly the stupidly wide smile on Nishinoya's face whenever he checked his phone at work. Azumane brought it up over lunch, and Nishinoya confided in him once again.

"So is that all you guys do…eat and talk?" Azumane asked.

Nishinoya blushed. "I mean, yeah…we both like food?"

Azumane chuckled. "Well, aren't there other things you'd want to do?"

Thus, Nishinoya was incepted with the idea that dates could involve more than just sitting and eating. After two days of brainstorming, he asked Hinata out on a day trip to an island just south of the city. The island was a popular getaway amongst city-dwellers, which Hinata had yet to visit, unlike Nishinoya, who had been several times to take photos and lie on the beaches. The boy beamed with pride, watching Hinata delight in the breeze on the ferry ride to their destination. Upon arrival, they rented bikes to ride along the boardwalk. They shared their second kiss while watching the sunset.

Dating Hinata changed after that. On one rainy weekend, the boys took to strolling through an art gallery that Hinata frequented every month. He volunteered to act as their tour guide for most of their visit, explaining the ingenuity of 18th-century paintings with an endearing lack of academic prowess. It was on that date that the two of them discovered they both enjoyed watching obscure movies. The following week, Hinata and Nishinoya attended a screening of an old Italian horror film at an independently-owned cinema.

With Hinata, Nishinoya found there was always an adventure to be had. Aimless strolls would stumble into small street festivals and city-owned greenhouses. Conversations would brew up more things they could try doing together. And with each date that passed, Nishinoya became more convinced of his affections for Hinata. He found Hinata to be intelligent and open-minded, an inspired storyteller, and the sort of debate opponent who was both fun yet infuriating to engage with. He had a dorky, mildly self-deprecating sense of humor that felt as dry as it did charming. He never shied away from serious conversations, and he held space for Nishinoya to do the same. Wherever their dates took them, from posh lounges in the financial district to loud flea markets in warehouses near the harbor—in every light, Hinata seemed to shine iridescently.

They continued to date in that manner, technically as 'friends,' though ones who dared the occasional cautious yet tender moment of romance—from the sweaty hand-hold to cozying up in the dark of a theatre. It was a detail that Nishinoya was okay with at first, but, as the summer flew by, Nishinoya grew increasingly excited—if not, all the more anxious—for if and when the next stage of their relationship would begin. The anticipation would hit hardest whenever Nishinoya was asked about Hinata by Azumane or Tanaka. Sometimes the feeling would spur without warning, through a sudden longing to hear Hinata's laughter or smell his cologne. During those times, Nishinoya's heart would flutter, as if it were about burst with how lucky he felt.

One Sunday afternoon in the early fall, Nishinoya was vacuuming around his apartment when Hinata rang his cell with a daunting proposal.

"I mean… I've never been clubbing before," Nishinoya replied.

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, it's just not my thing."

"It's not really mine either. It's just something I do once a year with Sugawara. In any case, I just thought I should ask."

Nishinoya heaved a deep sigh. The image emerged in his mind of Hinata dancing and getting hit on by another fellow—presumably someone taller and dressed better than he. The visual made Nishinoya's stomach lurch, who then gulped nervously before uttering, "Well, it's good to try everything once, right?"

…

They met the following Saturday at a bar near the club—a tiki-themed establishment on the east side of town adorned with tribal wood carvings, old surfboards, and lights fixtures made of tinted glass and rope. Nishinoya arrived twenty minutes late.

"Noya!"

He looked up to see Hinata waving from a booth at the back, sitting across from Daichi and Sugawara. Nishinoya approached them, taking a seat next to Hinata. The boys then exchanged greetings, ordered several tequila shots at the bar, and commenced with drinking shortly afterward. Meanwhile, the boys went around the table, catching up on each other's lives. As much as four years had passed since Nishinoya had last seen Sugawara and Daichi—for the most part, they looked the same as they did back then, save for some added lean weight. The two of them were still dating, having moved in together after graduating. Sugawara was working as a chemistry teacher at an all-girl catholic school. Daichi was employed at a startup as a UX developer for an upcoming alternate reality gaming platform. The two of them took turns sharing the way couples do: by interrupting each other with every seemingly crucial detail that their partner missed.

Sugawara butted in, "Wait, wasn't Mae the one who thought we were brothers?"

"No, Mae's the landlord's daughter," Daichi clarified. "It was his niece, Sarah."

Sugawara then stared at his glass, as if questioning whether his error was due to the liquor or his own faulty recollection.

Overall, the duo's collective effort in recounting their lives together was sweet and comical. It contrasted mightily with Nishinoya's recount of his past four years involving the sobering realities of coming out and finding self-acceptance. Perhaps it helped that everyone at the table had some relation to the subject, such that no one asked Nishinoya to go into the details. Still, he found opportunities to weave in bits of levity—namely learning about all the bewildering 'gay' stereotypes like having an unhealthy obsession with brunch or Soulcycle. Hinata hadn't much to share given he'd seen all parties at the table within the past month, merely mentioning that work was great and that his family was doing well. He casually brushed over how Nishinoya and he had been seeing each other frequently—a tidbit that Daichi and Sugawara didn't seem interested in pondering further. Nishinoya was hesitant to add anything else, unsure of how much information Hinata wanted to let his friends in on.

As the drinking went on, the conversations grew louder, and the jokes seemed funnier. Through it all, Nishinoya would notice how physically intimate Sugawara and Daichi were as a couple—spontaneous moments where either boy would brush their hand against the other's, or playfully knock their shoulder into the other. It made Nishinoya wonder if that was the sort of thing Hinata would be into. Then, sometime later that night, Hinata excused himself to go to the bar to ask for some waters for the four of them.

"Hey, that's my job," Sugawara protested, drunkenly raising his hand.

Hinata smirked. "Well, mothers need to be taken care of too sometimes," he quipped before scooting past Nishinoya. Nishinoya turned to observe the boy walk off towards the bar before turning back to see Sugawara leaning forward onto the table, forearms landing with punctuated 'thud'. A grin of mischief appeared on his face.

"So…what's up with you and Hina-chan?"

Nishinoya chuckled. He figured the subject might be brought up if ever he or Hinata were left alone with the other two boys.

"Nothing, we're just friends."

Sugawara pouted, unsatisfied with the answer.

"Maybe they're just taking things slow," Daichi offered. "How long have you two been seeing each other?"

"About two months now?"

"And have you slept together?" Sugawara pried.

"No, not yet."

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah, we agreed it might complicate things."

"But do you like him?"

Nishinoya could feel his heart fluttering in his chest once again. "I-I do. A lot, actually. I think he's something special."

Sugawara squealed excitedly, like someone reading some rather saucy fan-fiction." Oh, Hina-chan! You two would look so cute together! When are you going to make it official?!"

"I-I don't know yet," Nishinoya answered. "I don't really know how."

"You've never been in a relationship?" Daichi inquired.

"Not with another guy."

"But then you've dated girls. How'd you ask them out?"

"I dated one girl, and…I just asked her. I heard from a friend that she was into me, so I just dropped the question."

Sugawara leaned back into his seat, crossing his arms. "And you don't think Hina-chan likes you?"

The fluttering in Sugawara's chest grew all the more uncomfortable. "I guess he does. He just mentioned he didn't want to rush it. And I've never had to ask someone I've liked as much as I do with Hinata."

Sugawara bit his lip, trying to suppress an all too eager smile. "Well, you're asking all the right questions. Daichi didn't even know he had to askme."

"Ask you what?"

Nishinoya was startled to turn around and see Hinata standing behind him, holding a pitcher of water and four plastic cups. The boy then immediately stood up, allowing Hinata to take his seat further into the booth. Daichi covered his mouth, trying to conceal his laughter at the irony of the predicament. Only Sugawara, despite being as drunk as he was, maintained an impressive level of calm. "We're just talking about how Daichi asked me to his boyfriend," he stated with all the world's innocence.

Hinata smiled without delving further into it, pouring and handing out cups of water to each of his companions. Sugawara then began telling his story. "So Daichi was throwing this party during spring break. At the time, we were dating for about a month. Daichi was introducing me to some of his friends at this party as his boyfriend when I reminded him in front of everyone that he technically never asked me to be his boyfriend."

Out of the corner of his eye, Nishinoya could make out Daichi palming his face with embarrassment. "This again," the boy groaned.

Still, Sugawara pressed on, "So, Daichi stopped introducing me as such, but I didn't know he already told everyone beforehand that we were official. So I had to address the rumor every time it came up."

"But did you need to?" Daichi argued.

"Then, later that night, Daichi pulled me aside, and we had a small argument about it—at the end, he just asks me, 'Fine, will you be my boyfriend already?!'"

Nishinoya and Hinata burst into laughter. Only Daichi remained unamused. "Well, you did say 'yes' in the end."

"Well, of course, I did. Why wouldn't I?" Sugawara ceded, grinning warmly from cheek-to-cheek.

Daichi rolled his eyes before landing a quick kiss on the boy's lips.

…

It was no surprise that, given Nishinoya's height, the bouncer took longer to scrutinize the boy's ID. Ahead of him, he could hear Sugawara and Hinata giggling by the entrance to the club. Nishinoya bit down on his tongue, fighting the urge to start an argument with the security guy. Eventually, the bouncer handed Nishinoya back his driver's license and stepped aside. Nishinoya strolled through the front doors and found himself in a darkened lobby. A brightly-lit booth sat at the far end of the room, where the boys paid for cover. After, Sugawara led the charge down another hallway to the right where they encountered a second booth to coat-check their belongings.

Nishinoya hadn't brought anything worth checking in, and so he stepped back while Hinata and his friends handed over their jackets. Nishinoya then took the time briefly mull over the present situation—despite having eight or so shots of liquor in his system, he felt particularly uneasy about what was to come. He felt helpless to all the signs that cemented his fate, from the music reverberating through the walls to the other guests excitedly brushing passed him.

"Alright, it's time to dance!" Sugawara exclaimed moments later, before darting down the hall. Daichi trailed behind him, groaning with a sense of familiarity with the routine.

Hinata turned around, before smiling and holding out his hand. "Ready?"

Nishinoya grabbed hold, putting on as brave a face he could.

It's not that Nishinoya was against clubbing. He knew he wasn't much of a dancer, and doing so in public made him feel self-conscious. As he and Hinata pressed on, the hallways became narrowed by people loitering around—boys clad in button-downs with fashionable prints of paisley or pinstripes, or tank tops revealing elegant tattoos on toned bodies. One individual wore an intricately studded leather jacket, while his hair was styled in a slick pompadour. Nishinoya felt extraordinarily underdressed and underprepared, and he struggled to focus on the path ahead. Eventually, he could make out the figurative and literal light at the end of the tunnel—a room lit by flashes of purple and orange, colors switching to the roaring beat of disco. Nishinoya walked inside.

You mean I've been dancin' on the floor darlin', and I feel like I need some more.

The lights pulsed dizzyingly, briefly illuminating the crowd congregating at the room's center in washes of color. On the outskirts, people zipped every which way, holding drinks and shouting at friends at unknown ends of the room, their voices adding to the cacophony. The music overcame it all, with volume so aggressive, Nishinoya felt like a power drill was being driven through his skull.

"Woot!" Sugawara howled ecstatically. "I'm going in!"

"Wait up!" Daichi yelled, chasing after.

"W-Wait, what does he mean?" Nishinoya yelled, struggling to make his voice heard above the din.

"Just hold on to me!" Hinata replied.

Nishinoya tightened his grip on Hinata's hand, and the latter began moving into the mess of sweaty bodies on the dance floor.

And I feel your body close to mine, and I move on love. It's about that time.

The farther they got, the denser the crowd became. Despite the harrowing noise, Nishinoya could make out the groans of several who were inconvenienced by being brushed aside. Slowly, the image became Hinata eclipsed by the other patrons—the only reminder of his existence being the hand that Nishinoya held onto. And then, with one final tug, Nishinoya was pulled into a small space at the center of the room where he could barely make out Hinata, Sugawara, and Daichi. The four of them glanced at each other, briefly acknowledging their proximity before Sugawara began dancing with Daichi.

Make me feel mighty real.

Nishinoya gulped.

"It's alright, just stick with me!" Hinata reassured, wrapping his arms around Nishinoya's neck.

Nishinoya chuckled nervously before placing his hands on Hinata's waist. He felt the boy's hips swaying with the beat of the music, compelling his own body to do the same.

Make me feel mighty real.

Nishinoya then observed Hinata's shoulders moving to the rhythm. The boy closed his eyes, and a steady smile spread across his face. Then in one sudden move, Hinata unwrapped himself from Nishinoya.

Oh, you make me feel mighty real!

Hinata moved freely to the music, hands in the air, hips moving carelessly yet sensually. Seeing him made Nishinoya all the more aware of his own clumsy motions, as if he were a tin-man made of rusted joints.

Oh, you make me feel mighty real!

Nishinoya began hesitantly around for anyone staring or laughing, though people's faces remained veiled by the dimness of the room. His mind started concocting notions of what people were thinking—insults towards what he was wearing or how he was dancing. They all seemed to sense his panic, like that of a child abandoned by his parents on the first day of kindergarten.

"Hey, you came with me!" Hinata shouted, placing two hands on either side of Nishinoya's face.

Nishinoya smiled weakly. "Sorry."

Hinata let go and began dancing once more. This time, he rolled his arms around each other before throwing either hand into the air to the rhythm. Nishinoya observed once more though he couldn't help but sense a silliness to Hinata's new routine—as if the moves were pulled from a campy 80's jazzercise video.

"Are you teaching Zumba...?" Nishinoya joked.

"What?"

"Zumba! Are you teaching Zumba?" The boy repeated louder.

Hinata said nothing, though, given the humorous smile that grew on his face, it appeared he was more than aware of how he looked.

Oh, you make me feel mighty real!

Not knowing what else to do, Nishinoya tried copying Hinata—rolling his arms before throwing either hand out. He closed his eyes to allow his mind to dissect and process his surroundings. He focused on the music, allowing it to riddle his veins with its boisterous yet admittedly infectious beat.

Oh, you make me feel mighty real!

He began to notice what little space around him seemed to move on its own according to the music, implicitly guiding Nishinoya on how to sway and where to step. Nishinoya began moving in time with the ocean of bodies that engulfed him. It was then that the heat of the room grew to be an affirmation that he was not just in the caught middle of something, but a part of it. The sensation of being an outsider seemed to dissipate, and he no longer felt the need to fixate on how precise his movements were. Right there, on the dance floor, Nishinoya found himself swallowed up by a resounding urgency to celebrate life.

In the midst of it all, he heard Hinata shouting, "And you told me you couldn't dance!"

The other opened his eyes and grinned, replying, "I can't!"

Hinata grabbed hold of Nishinoya's hands, and the two of them continued to dance in whatever way their hearts desired.

I feel real…I feel real…I feel real.