Chapter 4: Faith

Logan finally found his frustration overwhelming. He stared at the mess he'd just created. Lashing out was not his style, but he'd just thrown his table over, and now his files were laying all spread out over the floor, out of order. It would take him hours to sort everything.

How was it that Max was always so calm? In spite of everything, how unfair her life had been, she managed to keep going and still have hope. Well, she can still actually do something, Logan thought to himself spitefully. He on the other hand was not enhanced, far from. He could walk only thanks to a machine that was subject to break at any moment, and at this rate, he wouldn't be able to afford fixing it. His sources were getting harder and harder to keep quiet and loyal with his lacking resources. He was facing a disease so that he couldn't even touch with his fingertip the woman that he loved. And the person responsible, at least in Logan's eyes, he couldn't fight or lash out against because Max felt he was on their side now.

The thought of Alec upset Logan. Alec, who had infected Max. Alec, who Max now would turn to without Logan's ability to give 100. Alec, who had a connection with Max and an understanding that Logan still didn't have but had worked to gain for 2 years now.

Logan realized where his thoughts were taking him. He almost laughed at himself, his human weaknesses coming through. He really was pathetic. He was blaming Alec for all of his problems. Though Alec had been the messenger, so to speak, bringing him one of his problems with the virus, it wasn't his fault.

Logan gave a defeated sigh. Manticore was all that he could blame. But it was bittersweet. Without Manticore, he never would have met Max. He couldn't imagine his life without her. Though he had lived with the thought of no Max a few months ago, when she'd been captured.

At the time, he knew she was alive, but he didn't know her state. Manticore could have been brainwashing her, experimenting on her, torturing her. The flashback of his dark thoughts at that time made him shudder. He of course knew what Max was going through. She didn't know right now whether or not her brother Zack and the rest of her siblings were safe. Those same horrible possibilities must have been going through her mind.

But she's stronger than me, Logan thought. She was able to suppress all the anger and manage to work through, still having the strength left for hope. She's always been stronger than me. Logan hadn't seen Max break down often. He saw the signs before, but never completely. She always held herself together around him. He was the same, of course. He would've been ashamed to find out if Max had seen his anger get the best of him here.

Thoughts of Max inspired Logan, willed him to keep going, and gave him a little hope. He knew that Max would find a way, she always did. In the meantime, he would just need to have faith and trust that everything would work out. He would keep on his sources. Maybe they would get a lucky break, some sort of tip about Zack.

Though Logan didn't like Zack, he loved Max. And he knew how much she needed Zack. Logan would put the virus at a lower priority for now. There was no need to tell Max, he would still be searching, but the bigger focus would be on Zack, the option with the most hope at the moment.

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"Well, you look strong…this job is pretty dangerous, though. You think you can handle yourself?"

Zack nodded, giving a fake smile, even adding some conversation. He was learning quickly how to avoid any type of suspicion of not being 'normal'. "I think I can handle myself well enough, I always have."

The man nodded, holding out his hand, "Well, good then. I say you've got the job!"

Zack accepted his handshake with a smile on the outside, but inside without any care. He had another job, for another month. Then it would be on to the next one. In the back of his mind was a thought, a bit of hope he didn't want to admit he had. That maybe, just maybe, if he traveled enough, somewhere along the lines, he would spot someone or some place that would trigger a memory. But for now, he would have to just keep going after jobs, and keep holding onto his piece of paper. He would have to just have a little faith that the rest would work out.