Sydneys POV

I opened the door to my flat and closed it behind me. For a few moments I just stood in the small hallway.

What now?

I walked through my living room and nearly smiled when I thought back to our first kiss yesterday.

No, that wasn´t right. It hadn´t been our first kiss I corrected myself.

I sighed. We hadn´t even talked about us.

Somehow I felt betrayed. He let me think, that all of the things that had happened between us were coincidences. Us meeting at Starbuck, than again at the library. He had been there, because I was I realized.

There had been no such thing as fade. Had he played me?

If everything he´d said was true, did he knew exactly what and when to say? Did he act like he did, so that I was falling for him? I didn´t want to think that.

I sighed again lying down on my coach.

Suddenly an even more disturbing thought crossed my mind.

What exactly was he able to do? Was he able to compel me? Did I really have this feelings for him or were they just part of his magic?

I felt the tears on my cheek, before I realized I was crying.

I couldn´t remember the last time, I actually cried.

But now lying here in my flat, alone, with everything said, I just couldn´t help it.

I cried and sobbed and felt more alone than ever before in my whole life.

I woke up and it was dark outside. I searched for my phone. It was shortly after midnight.

I had slept for hours. I slowly got up and walked into my bathroom.

I really needed to take a shower and than I would go back to sleep. I didn´t want to stay awake. Being awake meant, that I would have to think and thinking was the last thing I wanted to do right now.

I looked at myself in the mirror and frowned. My eyes looked red and swollen and I quickly turned away.

On my way back from the bathroom my eyes fell on the plate on my counter. The toast Adrian had made for me still was sitting there, untouched.

I cleaned the plate and took a bite of the toast, realizing I hadn´t been eating the whole day.

I was on my second bite, when I realized, that I was eating a toast with peanut butter and jelly on it.

So he claimed he knows me? I rarely ate something that sugary.

I separated the two toast slices and gasped.

In the middle of the toast, I saw a small pink jelly heart. On one side, there was missing a small part, the part I just ate.

I carefully placed the slice back on the counter, staring at it.

I had to admit, it really was cute. I imagined him in my kitchen, carefully painting the heart on the toast and I couldn´t help myself, I smiled.

He didn´t expect me to see this I realized. My heart warmed at this realization. Somehow, this was proof, that he hadn´t been playing with me.

I put the two slices back together and still smiling I walked into my bedroom enjoying every bite of my specially made PB&J.

I was lying in my bed and somehow this little gesture of his affection made me think, that maybe, just maybe, I could cope with all the insanity.

I grabbed my phone and scrolled to his name.

- Thanks for the sandwich. I especially liked the inside -

His response came immediately.

- I am happy you liked it. I wasn´t sure if you were actually going to eat it. You know, the sugar and all... But you have my heart. I want you to know that. Good night -

I read the message a couple of times. The comment about the containing sugar caught me by surprise and the comment about his heart made my head spin.

Oh my... what was I supposed to do?

Why hadn´t we talked about us? Now it was all I could think about.

We´d fallen in love h´d said. Love. I tested the word in my mind. I still felt kind of strange about that.

I suddenly blushed as another thought crossed my mind. Maybe kissing, hadn´t been the only thing we´d been doing.

A flush of embarrassment came rolling down on me. Oh God, I barley knew him.

I turned around once again and grabbed my phone

- We need to talk about us – I typed.

I checked my phone a few times in the following minutes but he didn´t respond.

Maybe he is already asleep, I thought.