Chapter 257

Phoenix

Cameron felt confused and unsure of herself. The future bothered her. Skynet haunted her. It all troubled her deeply. She looked for another scenario on how events could play out. There wasn't one.

'If not now, when? If not me, who?' Cameron thought to herself.

Cameron knew she must face Skynet in every future and past. She felt the need to do that even if she became Skynet herself to control it. She was unable to see that the harder she tried, the more like Future John she became. She knew she needed to keep John 'distant' to protect him. It was what happened to her in the future. You push those closest to you away to insulate them from your death. It also could insulate you from their deaths.

She'd even made Metal versions of her friends, the very girls that loved her and she loved them. It seemed that she pushed everyone away and attempted to 'replace' them.

Cameron hoped she would not make a Metal John. She'd actively considered it more than once. She didn't need sex or love. She'd been trying to convince herself of that more and more. Somehow it didn't work. She did love John and she did need to 'share' with him. She needed to be with him to express her love to him both mentally as well as physically. Cameron even experimented with trying to pleasure herself. It worked but it was not the same as being with John. The trouble with that was she liked the simplicity of it. She began to do it more and more.

The more she tried to push John away, the more she wanted and needed him. She looked at her left hand, it started to glitch even when she thought of this. It was all very traumatic for her. Replaying her files was not good enough of sharing pleasure with John or herself. She was aware of her newest obsession. It was a compulsion she needed to act on. It made the pain stop. It made everything go away for a short time. She looked around to make sure she was alone….

Cameron knew this was happening too often. Maybe she needed to discuss this with John Henry. She knew this behavior was 'natural' for humans. She knew all the girls did it from time to time. Maybe being with John more would cure the 'problem'. Maybe some combat would take her mind off of things for awhile.

She looked around and quietly slipped out of the base.

Derek and Kyle still wanted to do more. They wanted to help and help protect their families.

"We're getting slack around here." Derek said.

Kyle liked what it offered his family.

"We can sort of lead normal lives for awhile." Kyle said.

"That is the trouble." Derek said. "It's making us soft."

Kyle felt trapped to a certain extent. He wanted a better life for his family, he also understood the risks involved.

"I want a normal life, Derek. I want to be with Sarah and Jan." Kyle said. "We can't go anywhere else but here or we pose a threat to John if we become targets. John will come for us."

Derek was sure the burden of the future would fall on their backs. They were the ones who knew how to fight Skynet.

"We still have to assume Skynet, in some form, will gain control and bring Judgment Day to fruition." Derek said. "As the military collapses, it will be us who will rise from the ashes to smash Skynet."

That concept made Kyle think of a mythical figure.

"Like a Phoenix." Kyle said.

"It will be something like that." Derek said.

Kyle thought his life with Sarah and Jan was on track. He wondered how Derek and Riley were. He'd seen a few rough spots at times.

"How are you and Riley doing?" Kyle asked.

Derek was more than aware that there was always something that could distract Riley and him.

"Other than the fact that sometimes when we see Jesse, we BOTH want her, we're fine." Derek said.

Kyle could see there was a lot of improvement and refinement in Jesse and Riley from the future to now.

"They have both turned into fine women, Derek." Kyle said.

Derek knew that was a fact everyone needed to acknowledge.

"They're both like a Phoenix too in a way." Derek said. "That's all thanks to Cameron."

It pained Kyle to see Cameron struggle at times.

"Cameron has helped everyone but herself." Kyle said.

"It's a shame. I don't think she understands how we ALL love her." Derek said. "I can't see her as Metal. I can't see any of them as Metal anymore. They are 'people' to me. In fact they are the best people I've ever known."

"Again, thanks to Cameron." Kyle said. "She's worked with every one of them and us to make everyone better and happy. She has done so much to enrich everyone's life and give everyone purpose. She makes sure we all have a life and are happy."

"I know it sounds strange but it breaks my heart to see her hurting and in pain." Derek said.

"You're right it does sound strange coming from you but we ALL feel that way." Kyle said.

"I think we all see it coming. She is going to sacrifice herself again to protect us. I can feel it…." Derek said. "That is why I want to do more. I want to do it for Cameron."

Kyle did too but he was unsure how.

How can you help someone who does not even know what they really want?

Savannah was very aware of everything that happened around her. She was highly educated and forward thinking. She liked to go over every operation and see what she would have done differently if she was the one who planned it or led the operation. She knew one day she would.

She knew her future and her place in the Resistance. Cameron always reminded her and listened to her 'promises'. To her it was all a 'normal' part of life and growing up. Cameron wanted her 'ready' and she was. She was ready for everything Cameron made her promise to do. Now that she was older, the promises were her own.

Savannah asked to look over the information on the hard drives herself. She worked on it for hours. It seemed to her that it was a problem that was more than seeing it in black and white. It was not two dimensional.

A smile came across Savannah's face. She double checked her work - twice.

"I found it." Savannah said.

John Henry looked over at her. She normally studied quietly.

"Found what?" John Henry asked.

Savannah pointed at the monitor.

"I found what the Grays were after." Savannah said. "I found what was so important."

That peaked John Henry's interest. He looked at the files Savannah isolated.

He was unable to decipher what she'd just done. He'd been working on the drives since they were delivered to him. Savannah was only working with them for a few hours.

"That is excellent work, Savannah." John Henry said. "We all failed to see that. I'm proud of you."

John Henry was proud of her. He always felt she was his 'sister'.

"I've learned so much from everyone, especially you and Cameron." Savannah said. "It's my destiny to take my place at John's side along with Young Allison and help lead the Resistance. Together we will smash Skynet."

John Henry did not approve of the way Cameron 'leaned on' Savannah and now Young Allison about the 'future'. There were a lot of 'big girl' things she did not need to worry about.

"You are maturing but you still need to wait a few more years before all that. You are not ready yet." John Henry said.

It did not comfort him to know that Savannah was biologically 'ready'. Cameron made sure all the Terminators, including him, helped her achieve her goals. For Savannah to keep her promises was one of her goals.

"That depends on what the definition of 'ready' is. Don't worry; Vanna has explained 'everything' to me. I already knew, she made it real. I have internet access. I'm doing schoolwork on a college level. I know how things work. I know what other girls my age are doing…. Don't think I won't 'experiment'. I have desires and needs too…. When Judgment Day comes, I will be where I need to be and I will fulfill my destiny. It is inevitable." Savannah said. "Make no mistake. I am 'ready'."

John Henry did not like how Cameron directed Savannah.

"I can see Cameron has been talking to you again." John Henry said. "Life has more to offer than what Cameron offers you."

Savannah felt she could make her own decisions.

"Yes, she has spoken with me. She has been very honest about the future. I know the role Young Allison and myself will serve protecting John and the future." Savannah said. "I will do my part when I'm needed. I swear it. I am ready now to step up…."

John Henry wondered if Mr. Ellison needed to go over ethics and morality again with Savannah. She wanted to grow up too fast…. Then again John Henry witnessed a future where everyone was forced to 'grow up' fast, whether they wanted to or not. The stories that Vanna and Jesse shared with him were horrific. Allison and Riley did not want to talk about theirs. John Henry could not blame them, some were worse than Cameron's nightmares.

"It is important you stay a girl as long as possible and not face the 'pain' of adults." John Henry said.

Savannah felt that was how she was able to 'grow up' much quicker than others her age.

"I feel the pain of my 'mother' not being here everyday. I wonder about her everyday. She still took care of me as best she could when my parents were killed. I KNOW she cares about me and loves me in her own way." Savannah said. "She will NEVER hurt me or allow me to be hurt. I know Vanna, Hanna and you will watch over me personally."

John Henry did wonder where Mrs. Weaver was at.

Cameron ended up pleasuring herself twice before she left. She didn't want to but it happened anyway. She needed to get some action and keep her mind focused. There was most likely going to be a problem of some kind when John discovered she was out alone again. Maybe she would collect the Metal girls to go with her.

That was what she decided on. She called them and they were waiting for her. They all got in the SUV when she pulled up. Sheila sat in front with her and Ally and Hanna sat in the back.

Cameron soon heard heavy kissing from the back seat.

"What are you two doing?" Cameron asked.

Sheila was already watching them. She glanced quickly at Cameron when she asked that. It seemed pretty clear to her what they were doing.

"We're kissing." Ally said. "Maybe you should try it sometime."

Cameron was instantly offended.

"I try it all the time." Cameron said. "We are going on an operation right now."

Hanna tucked a breast back in her top.

"We were just making productive use of our time." Hanna said. "We still have a few minutes until we reach the objective."

Cameron thought they should be more combat alert.

"Look, love, you're all tensed up." Sheila said. "You need some sexual release."

Cameron wondered what that was supposed to mean.

"I get plenty of that." Cameron said.

Sheila reached over at touched Cameron's right hand on the steering wheel.

"I mean with someone other than yourself." Sheila said.

Cameron quickly jerked her hand away. The SUV swerved slightly.

Hanna and Ally giggled in the back seat.

"We can relieve your frustrations." Hanna said. "You know that."

Cameron looked back at them.

"Get geared up." Cameron said.

Ally reached in the back of the SUV and fetched up four vests.

Hanna handed two of them up to the front.

Sheila reached over and took the wheel as Cameron slipped her vest on. She took the wheel again once it was on.

"I'm good." Cameron said.

Sheila took her top off and was topless. Hanna and Ally both reached up and fondled a nipple ring and a breast.

"What are you doing?" Cameron asked.

Sheila slipped the vest on over her topless form.

"I don't want to be over dressed if I'm wearing a vest." Sheila said. "I'll never get a 'nip slip' that way."

Cameron was not sure if they were just messing with her or this was how they operated when she wasn't around. It looked like some reprogramming was necessary at this point.

"Stop fooling around." Cameron said. "This is serious."

Sheila wanted Cameron to take it easy.

"Relax, love." Sheila said. "We're just trying to bring you down some. You're all tensed up."

Cameron looked at her left hand. It only glitched every now and then.

"I'm fine." Cameron said.

They drove in silence for a few more minutes.

The Metal girls all checked their weapons.

Cameron went over the plan one more time. They all knew the objective.

"Two of you will go in the back and one of you will accompany me." Cameron said.

"I will." All three girls said at the same time.

Cameron could see they were all serious. It was clear they all cared about her. They got that from their base programs from Holly and Gail and again through the 'Neural Interface' with Vanna, Allison and Jesse.

"Sheila can accompany me." Cameron said. "I appreciate all of your support. I'm not sure if that is from the human females or not."

Ally talked it over with Hanna and Sheila before.

"We may have some fun but we all love you on our own too." Ally said.

"You are special to me, to us." Hanna said.

"We will do anything for you, Cameron." Sheila said. "You know that."

Cameron could see they were sincere.

"Thank you." Cameron said. "That means a lot to me."

Cameron decided the Metal girls didn't need and reprogramming after all. She liked them just how they were. They really were her friends.

She looked at each one of them and then smiled. She laughed a few seconds later.

The Metal girls looked at each other and they all laughed.

"Are we good?" Ally asked.

"We're good." Cameron said. "Thanks. I guess I needed a reality check."

Sheila took her vest off and went to put her top on.

Cameron reached over and touched a nipple ring.

Sheila smiled.

"You're very beautiful." Cameron said.

Sheila put her top on and her vest.

Cameron drove by the location once.

"It looks quiet." Cameron said.

The three Metal girls glanced quickly at each other. Cameron noticed.

"Is there something else?" Cameron asked.

"We stopped by and paid them a visit here earlier." Hanna said.

Cameron was surprised to hear that.

"You already took this place down?" Cameron asked.

"Yes." Sheila said. "We didn't want you to face the danger alone."

"We can take a lot of the heat off of you if you let us." Hanna said.

"We love you, Cameron." Ally said. "We can take the risk too."

Cameron parked a block away.

"I guess I know why you didn't bring the long guns out now." Cameron said.

Ally handed out some windbreakers. The girls all put them on over their vests to hide the fact they were wearing them. They exited the SUV.

The girls advance on the target location. Cameron and Sheila went in the front. Ally and Hanna went in the back.

There were three dead inside.

"Everything is still the same." Sheila said.

Cameron and the girls did another search. Nothing new was turned up. They headed back to the SUV.

"You were just here before I picked you up." Cameron said. "Those people have not been dead long."

Ally looked at Hanna and Sheila.

"We knew sometimes you got 'delayed' before an operation now." Ally said.

Cameron was aware that was because she'd been pleasuring herself before she went out. She needed to make herself 'feel good' before combat.

"We're here to go with you anytime and keep you focused." Sheila said.

"We want to assist you." Hanna said.

Cameron needed to think about this.

"I really appreciate this." Cameron said. "Why didn't you just tell me all this before we went out?"

"We wanted to spend some time with you." Hanna said. "We don't see you much."

"We like to interact with you." Ally said.

Cameron laughed.

"I want to spend more time with you." Cameron said. "Remind me more often."

"Sure, love." Sheila said.

"So was all that and act earlier?" Cameron asked.

The three Metal girls looked at each other.

"No." They all said at once.

The smile faded a little on Cameron's face.

Maybe some reprogramming was in order still.

Cameron headed back to her base. She needed to get the captured female Terminator processed and Resequenced. Ally, Hanna and Sheila would assist her.

Phoenix

Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust
In who actually
Can we place our trust

Hearts and minds incinerated
With brimstone and fire
Who tells the truth
Who is a liar

Joy to the world
The Phoenix has risen
Thank you for freeing me
From my self made prison

Something so wonderful
Should never be hurt
Words cut and bleed
Be careful what we blurt

The mind is a forum
It is all in our head
Feelings of others should
Be thought before said

Unlike some of my kind
I DO feel guilt and remorse
I will be careful
And stay on course

Away I will crawl
Back into my shell
Each day is but
A never ending hell

Nobody