Chapter 264

How Long

Derek, Kyle and Jim conducted a series of recons. They'd turned most of them into hits and taken down the targets. This was really a form of veiled combat operations and not recons or surveillance.

They actually expected Cameron or John to put an end to it but for some reason they hadn't. That was fine with them. They liked being out in the field and the targets were mostly soft targets. That wasn't always the case. They'd run into some trouble on the last one and Jim took a few rounds that were meant for one of them.

Cameron was aware of what was going on and sent Dan and Frank to shadow them. They would establish a sniping position if possible to back them up or cover their advances and withdrawals. She knew that John always wanted to be out in the field and so did the Reese brothers. The more she allowed them to do, the less that John could do or complain about not doing.

Kyle was a little worried about Jim.

"I'm really sorry about that last place, Jim." Kyle said.

It was a sobering reminder that things could go wrong, fast.

"I'm one hundred percent functional." Jim said. "The vest stopped most of the rounds."

Derek looked Jim over.

"Maybe it did but a few found their mark." Derek said.

Jim watched Derek kill the man responsible for shooting at him.

"You terminated the Gray." Jim said. "Problem solved."

Both Derek and Kyle doubted that when they would return back to the base. There was sure to be an issue.

Jim drove the SUV. They'd needed to dump the original one they started out in. It received a few stray rounds at another location. They didn't want any unnecessary attention. John Henry did a good job of keeping all local law enforcement personnel away from anywhere they operated and suppressed all 911 traffic in regards to anything they did.

They were in San Bernardino County now. It was a big place. It was bigger than half a dozen European countries were in size and half the size of half a dozen more. It was mostly rural desert terrain. On the back roads one could drive for hours and never even see another vehicle. There were a lot of mountain, hills and rocks. In some places it looked like the surface of Mars.

That is where they were now.

"I'm glad I used the restroom in Barstow." Derek said.

"I'm glad you did too." Kyle said. "The way you kept cutting them was enough to gag a maggot."

Derek didn't think that was his fault. He didn't know they'd actually get a few recons the next day.

"Flatulence is a normal human process." Jim said. "We hear it all the time."

"TMI." Derek said.

"You're lucky." Kyle said. "You can turn off you hearing and olfactory systems. I can't."

They turned off a paved county road and onto a dirt road.

Derek looked behind them as the drove. They kicked up a cloud of dust now.

"If anyone is around where we're headed, they're going to see us coming from several miles away." Derek said.

"I didn't think you would want to hike in on foot in the darkness." Jim said.

"We've been in the car for hours." Kyle said. "I little walk would do us good."

"It's sixteen miles." Jim said.

That was a long hike.

"A little dust cloud is OK." Derek said.

They drove for twenty more minutes.

Jim stopped the SUV.

"It should be right over that ridge." Jim said.

They geared up and headed there on foot.

They reached an observation point where they could look down on the target fifteen minutes later.

There were big piles of dirt around a hole in the side of a mountain.

"I take it that we're looking at an old mine." Derek said. "We passed dozens of them on the way here. What's different about this one?"

Kyle looked over the area with a small pair of binoculars.

"Derek, you'd better take a look at this." Kyle said.

Derek did and noted there were several figures on the ground. They were bloody and looked dead.

"What do we have here?" Derek asked.

"That is what we are here to determine." Jim said. "Skynet likes to hide underground and mines make the perfect place. They are already there with multiple shafts and tunnels."

They moved cautiously down the hill through a gully.

"How was this place located?" Kyle asked.

"John Henry found some images from a Chinese spy satellite." Jim said. "It passed over the location yesterday."

"What are the Chinese looking for out here?" Derek asked.

"John Henry takes control of all satellites as they pass over land and searches for anything they can pick up that stands out as different." Jim said.

"So he picked up those stiffs?" Derek asked.

"No." Jim said. "They were alive at the time."

"Who killed them?" Kyle asked.

"That is what we are to ascertain." Jim said.

They went down and checked the area. Coyotes looked like they gnawed on several of the men during the night.

They inspected the area and into the mine opening itself. It was collapsed a hundred feet in. It looked like a very recent cave-in.

"This mine is unsafe. The timbers are rotted." Jim said. "We are going to withdraw."

They were unable to determine who the men were or what they'd done there. But it looked like someone came there and killed them and blew the mine closed.

Jim was sure this was the work of the anti-Metal faction. They were a threat to Skynet and the Resistance.

"This was nothing." Jim said. "We are going back to the base."

Kyle and Derek were sure there was more in play here but it didn't look like Jim was going to spill it.

"Can we stop in Barstow again?" Derek asked.

"That's it." Kyle said. "You're riding in the back."

Cameron was very worried about Vanna and Allison. That was TRUE love and she somehow ruined it. She knew how much they loved each other. Now it was her fault the relationship seemed to have evaporated. She'd 'pulled' Jesse and Derek apart to get Riley 'out of the way'. Maybe she should just have let John have Riley when this version of her showed up. Then John would've been happy. Riley was a nice girl. This was a relationship that would have developed on its own without outside manipulation. She wondered if she should try to get Jesse and Derek back together to free Riley up for John. Now she was planning people lives for them again. It just happened in an instant in her mind. That's how all the thoughts were.

She was unsure of all her decisions and actions. Was she the 'Bitch' everyone thought she was? That troubled her. Why did they all love her? She couldn't understand it. They should all hate her. It seemed the more she did to MAKE them hate her, the more they LOVED her instead. Maybe they all understood she was trying to HELP. It just seemed so many things did not work out as planned. Things that were clear cut and logical to her did not seem that way to others. That made no sense to her.

Cameron thought about what Vanna told her. Was she drifting too far away from John? She didn't want to but at times it seemed they didn't have anything in common. How could they? She was Metal, a machine, John was human. He was real, she was not. It was two different worlds. She was a mechanical device masquerading as a human female. She would never be a human female. She would always be a machine.

The more Cameron thought about it, the more it made her hate herself. Why couldn't she have been allowed to stay in the future? That is where she belonged and wanted to be. She seemed to have everything she wanted then. Now what did she have? It seemed that it was a nightmare that she'd created. How many lives did she alter and how many relationships did she destroy? Why couldn't these people all understand. She NEEDED to protect John and the future. THAT was what she was trying to do. THAT was her function. She wanted to share with John now to show him she loved him.

Cameron walked up to John and kissed him.

John thought that was different. He wondered what was up.

"Hey, good looking." John said. "Is there anything I should know about?"

Cameron felt a little offended.

"Did you ask me that because I kissed you?" Cameron asked.

John was a little displeased with everything that seemed to be going on. He felt it was a fair question. He doubted he would receive a straight answer.

"Yes." John said. "I don't see you often and I don't even know if it is really you or Ally playing you or some other copy of you I don't know about."

Cameron was already on her way to being angry.

"If it was a copy of me, it WOULD be ME." Cameron said.

She was now even angrier.

Cameron couldn't understand why John couldn't comprehend that her program was her. It was not her sheath or chassis. They were interchangeable. Now she needed to worry about Ally. She wondered if there was some 'hanky panky' that went on that she didn't know about.

"I hope Ally hasn't played any 'games' when I'm out. I wouldn't put it past her. I can switch chips with her if you would like to compare our chassis 'performance'. Her chassis hasn't been touched by a male…." Cameron said. "You know I want you to be with the 'real girls', John."

'Here we go again.' John thought.

"I know you say you do but I don't believe you really do." John said.

John saw how Cameron would start to glitch when she was trying to push the girls on him. Cameron may have 'believed' that is what she wanted for him. He saw it differently. She was still trying to do what Future John must have programmed her to do.

Cameron was unsure why John could not comprehend what was needed for the future. There was so much that revolved around him and his survival.

"John, it's something that must be done for the future. The sooner you get it over with and accept them, the sooner I will be able to adapt to it." Cameron said. "I will allow each of them two nights a week with you and only one for myself."

John smiled to himself. He wondered how Cameron, how anyone, could say that about the person they loved. It would kill him if the roles were reversed.

"What better deal could a guy ask for?" John asked. "Did you ever consider the other peoples feelings? If people are 'together' they are going to develop feelings and become possessive. It will lead to conflict. Love and hate will build, jealousy will follow."

"The nature of the future will allow for many things to be shared." Cameron said. "Females not under 'protective custody' will face many hardships."

John was unsure how many times he'd heard the same story. It was probably in the thousands by now. He thought all of this was a deflection off of the real issue.

"So we saw." John said. "Now, why are you really here?"

That statement offended Cameron even more. She really did not care for John's disposition.

"I'm here to catch up with you." Cameron said. "I've been busy and I don't want you to feel neglected."

John pointed out she'd provide him with others so she wasn't really necessary.

"Jesse and Vanna are here." John said. "Isn't that what you want?"

Cameron did not like John's attitude. Cameron decided to tell him the truth but not why.

"If you want the truth, I want it to be Allison." Cameron said.

John believed he could work through some of Cameron's thought process. He'd been around her long enough. Then again, he really didn't know her at all.

"I know." John said. "That's because she is most like you and you do not think I will wander too far. You believe your bodies are identical. You think you can 'take' me back easier if it is Allison. Vanna and Jesse are different and you may lose me to them. You are worried I may find something I like better."

It was what Cameron thought.

"I've run the calculations." Cameron said. "You are correct."

This all still seemed like a lot of deflection to John.

"Why are you really here?" John asked again.

Cameron felt frustrated at this point. She did not want to be confronted or be confrontational.

"I don't know. I don't want to drift too far away from you." Cameron said. "We can't have a normal life."

John wanted to salvage the relationship. He loved Cameron and he was sure she loved him. It was the circumstances they were in and the future that weighed on them. He thought he'd come up with a solution.

"Cameron, if we get the TDE working into the past again, would you go back in time with me fifty or a hundred years ago to live a normal life?" John asked. "It could be a new beginning for us."

Cameron wondered about this same thing many times. In most of the scenarios she often sent John back without her to protect him from 'everything' including herself.

"Do you just mean the two of us?" Cameron asked.

It seemed pretty simple and straight forward to John. The fewer people there were, the less complicated it would be.

"Yes." John said.

Since she was a machine and unable to produce human offspring there was a major problem. She already knew what he wanted.

"I still would be unable to provide you with children." Cameron said. "I know you would like to be a father. I know you want your own offspring. You've told me that. I'm trying to help you. I'm trying to provide for you what you want."

John looked at Cameron for a minute and ran over many of their conversations together. He was sure he'd never mentioned that.

"I never said that." John said.

Cameron looked at him with a faint smile.

"No, not yet but you do, you will." Cameron said. "We've spent days discussing everything."

John was irritated to hear that. That was not him. He hated when Cameron equated him to his future self. The more he knew about Future John the more he hated him. Maybe that was the point. Maybe that is how Cameron prevented him from becoming 'Future John'.

"That wasn't me, Cameron." John said. "That was Future John."

Cameron didn't see there was a real difference.

"You are him." Cameron said. "You will be."

At this point along with everything that he knew, he really hoped not.

"That I seriously doubt." John said. "If one of the girls was to have my baby and give it to you, would you go back in time as just the three of us?"

Cameron thought that would be acceptable.

"Yes." Cameron said. "I love you and you love me."

John doubted Cameron was serious.

"And after I am dead, what will happen then?" John asked.

Cameron didn't say anything at first. She just looked at John and wondered where it all went wrong at. She came to him to share with him now, not fight with him.

"John, I don't want to talk about this." Cameron said. "I came here to see and be with you. Can't we just have our lives here and now?"

John could see Cameron was serious. Now he felt foolish.

"I'm sorry, Cameron." John said. "I didn't mean to seem like a jerk."

Cameron gave him a faint smile. She'd already calculated every possibility.

"I know, John. It's alright." Cameron said. "I've run every scenario you can think of millions of times. I worry about all of this and EVERYTHING. I'm trying as best as I can. I am. This is where we are at now."

John knew that could change and change fast.

"For how long will it be?" John asked.

"I wish I could answer that." Cameron said. "I really do."

"I wish you could too…." John said.

Cameron led John away to their room.

She knew the more she did this, the more John would never let her go. She couldn't help it. She wanted it too. She wanted to be with him. She wanted him to touch her.

Cameron stopped outside the doorway.

"Well?" Cameron asked.

John picked up what she wanted.

"Do you want me to carry you over the threshold again?" John asked.

Cameron smiled and her face lit up.

"I want our wedding night again." Cameron said.

Cameron replayed that night over and over. It was never as good on a rerun. Cameron liked to have John actually do it, as if was their first time. She always created a new file so it really was like her 'first time' to her. She'd revert to her regular programming after the first round. Cameron wondered how many times it had been her 'first time'…. It was a lot.

'Wild Thing' by 'The Troggs', played as John slowly stripped Cameron.

Amend

I'm not like the others
I never tried to pretend
Everything I said was true
Never to hurt you did I intend

I wanted to share
I wanted a friend
I wanted to be loved
I never wanted to offend

You said I was different
My true self I did extend
Love is more than physical
To your heart I did ascend

Whenever you needed help
On me you could depend
I never took advantage
Your honor I did defend

I believe in you
Your inner beauty to commend
I'm HURT but still here
Never to demean or condescend

Nobody