Harry Potter and the Heir to Gondor
A Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings fusion by Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: This is a fanbased parody work of prose. Please support the official release.
Author's Note: I love Lord of the Rings because it has aged like fine wine. And Harry Potter I'm at best mixed on, as it has aged like warm milk. But it just keeps pulling me back in, just as I thought I was out. So here's something random I cooked up.
Draco Malfoy seethed to himself as he sat in a mine cart, travelling down the rails into the depths of Gringrott's Bank. The stinking goblin next to him was silent as they descended, which the Malfoy heir was grateful for. It was bad enough just looking at the creatures, and smelling them-Hearing them was even worse.
Still, it would be worth it if he could find what he sought. Something to counter that damn Potter.
The Sword of Gondor? The Sword of Gondor?!
And he was allowed to go around with it, like he was some kind of hero!
He wouldn't let Potter win. Not this time. Not again.
They came to a stop outside an ancient looking vault. It was bronze and dark with dust, but Draco could still make out ancient runes and markings all over it in the dim torchlight. He stood up, and climbed out of the mine cart to the stone floor.
"Your parents know you have the key, correct?" The goblin asked. Draco sneered back at him.
"I paid you enough Galleons to not care, didn't I?" Draco demanded. The goblin smirked.
"Did you?" He asked.
Draco grumbled, and reached into his pockets. He pulled out another few golden coins, and dropped them in the waiting goblin's hand. The goblin closed his fingers, his sharp teeth glinting in the light.
"Wait here," Draco ordered. He turned and walked up to the vault doors, looming over him. He felt an ominous feeling just being near it, but he soldiered on. He pulled out the ancient key, and slid it into the lock.
The vault groaned as he turned it, like some ancient great beast, before the doors slowly opened. He stepped back from the opening, and the magical lamps flicked on inside. It cast the interior with dim fire light-But it revealed enough Draco's eyes widened in greed.
Piles of gold sat in splendor. Not Galleons-Gold bars, stacked to the ceiling. Silver bars and coins were everywhere, shining brightly. Draco shook his head-He wasn't here for that though.
There were more important things than money, for once.
Draco pulled out some parchment and read the notes he had taken down.
He made his way through the mess of wealth. He scanned the back, for his quarry... And his eyes narrowed when he spotted what he sought.
It was an ancient looking chest, black iron and dark oak. It was locked up tight, covered in magical chains and a large lock on the front. Draco walked up to it, and read the runes on the chest.
"Oth... Garn..." He read. He nodded. "Yes..."
He took the ancient key, and pressed it into the lock. He turned the key, and the lock came apart. The chains fell away, clattering to the gold and silver covered floor. Draco seized the edges of the chest, and threw it open. He looked down, squinting in the darkness.
On a small pillow, undisturbed by the motions of the crate, sat a small, silver ring. It was plain, but still shone pleasingly in the dim light. He reached down, and seized the ring. He turned it over in his hands, and grinned. He could feel the power running through the tiny band, as though it had been struck by lightning.
He took the ring, and pulled it onto his right pointer finger.
It slid down easily, and the moment it went on he felt electrified. The entire world became darker, colder, and wavering. Like he was the only real thing in a world of smoke. He turned and walked to the entrance. The goblin stared uncomprehendingly, looking confused.
"Master Malfoy? Are you there?" He called.
Draco stood in front of him. He made a face, and made rude gestures with his hands. The goblin remained confused, looking all over.
Yes... Yes! He was invisible! The ring had made him so! It felt so... Amazing, really. Though damn, he was becoming very cold. He needed a warming charm, fast.
Abruptly, another mine cart flew down the rails and came to a screeching halt behind the first one. In it was another goblin, and the tall form of Draco's father, Lucius. His father, usually unflappable, looked alarmed.
"Draco? DRACO?!" He called, leaping out of the cart and searching around. Draco grinned, puffing up his chest.
"Father! I have it!" Draco cried. "Our family's Middle Earth relic! More than a match for Potter, as soon as I learn how to-"
Lucius growled, glaring in anger and fear. So intense that even Draco, invisible as he was, was taken aback.
"You fool! Draco, that ring doesn't work! Don't you know what Othgarn means?!"
"... Dark Sin?" Draco hazarded. Lucius shook his head.
"It means useless!"
"Useless?! It's working just fine!" Draco insisted. The goblins looked at eachother, as Lucius scowled.
"Is it? Try to take it off," Lucius said slowly, as though Draco was being very stupid. Draco hated that condescending tone of his father's.
He reached down, took hold of the ring, tugged...
The ring didn't budge. Draco's eyes widened.
He pulled harder, grunting as he attempted to get it off. The ring didn't register his efforts-as though it was now a part of his finger.
"It... it won't come off!" Draco cried.
"No, it wouldn't," Lucius stated coldly, "it was a failure. All it does is lock itself onto the fool who wears it, slowly transforming them into a wraith."
"A wraith?!" Draco cried. "F-Father! Father, get it off! Cut off my finger! GET IT OFF ME!"
"If I tried, it would only leave in you that state until you succumbed!" Lucius barked.
"Then-Then what do we do?!" Draco begged. Lucius closed his eyes and sighed deeply.
"There is only one person we can turn to. Get in the cart-We need to make a call..."
Harry parried the strike, and Petunia's follow up swing. Petunia switched her stance abruptly, and thrust Hadhafang for Harry's belly. The boy managed to twist aside, and swung Anduril wide for Petunia. His aunt ducked the blow and abruptly flipped her blade hilt first. She slammed it into Harry's stomach, and the young wizard fell to the carpeted floor with a loud grunt.
"Haa...!"
Petunia panted hard, as her nephew tried very hard to get the wind she'd knocked out of him. She did have a small smile though.
"Better," she managed. "But don't get carried away-If the enemy does something unexpected, it's better to move than get boxed in. Which is why you should always be aware of your surroundings-Understand?"
"Y-Yeah," Harry managed. Petunia held out a hand, and Harry grasped it. His smaller aunt helped him up to his feet, and he stood unsteadily. Petunia nodded.
"Now, let's have a rest and some water before we try again," she said.
"Of course," Harry said with a nod. His aunt was in a tank top and sweatpants, her hair up in a knot. It was very difficult to reconcile her fit, beautiful form with the horse faced nag he'd dealt with his entire life, even after weeks of training. But it was still a step up from how she'd been treating him.
"Blimey Mrs. Dursley, you're rough!" Ron said from the couch.
Another big change, of course, was that Harry's friends could visit. Though judging from the glazed looks in Fred, George and Ron's eyes, Harry didn't think it was entirely just for him.
Hermione was, though Harry had caught her glaring a bit enviously at his aunt from time to time. That was strange.
"Yes, but it's better to sweat now than bleed later," Petunia lectured. "Hermione, will you join me in getting some refreshments?"
"Uh, yes ma'am," Hermione said, standing up. She followed Harry's aunt to the kitchen. Ron, George and Fred all stared after Petunia as she went-Harry had to clear his throat loudly.
"Ahem?"
"Ah, sorry Harry," Fred said, "just uh... Appreciating your decor."
"And Mrs. Dursley," George said.
"There's a lot to appreciate," Fred added.
"I have a sword," Harry stated, "and that's my aunt."
Y-yeah, but still, wow," Ron breathed.
"Mate, that's my aunt!" Harry growled. "So sod off already!"
"It's just very hard not to notice how hot she is," Ron said, shrugging, "you're just kind of have to get used to it, mate!"
Petunia returned, carrying one tray of water in glasses and some sandwiches. Hermione followed, looking a bit unhappy at having to serve food and drinks.
"Thank you so much, Mrs. Dursley," Ron said cheerfully, "and you too, Hermione-"
"Cram it," Hermione muttered, and Ron abruptly squirmed away from her.
Petunia smiled regally, nodding to the visiting boys.
"You're quite welcome, Ronald Weasley. And thank you for the compliment-I am rather hot, aren't I?"
Ron twice to blush and turn pale at the same time. Fred and George remained carefully stoic. Hermione scowled a bit.
Harry sat down on a loveseat next to Hermione, and he tore into the sandwiches and water. Hermione ate her own fill, though she still looked unhappy.
"Anyway, now that you're here, I can help Harry with another aspect of his training," Petunia said, "Fred, George, if you please?"
"Anything you want, Mrs. Dursley!" Fred said, immediately on his feet.
"Absolutely anything!" George added, mirroring his twin. Petunia nodded.
"Now, please walk over to the far side of the room and pull out your wands," Petunia said, "we're going to learn how to deflect spells."
"Er," Harry began, "but the Ministry of Magic will see it."
"Yes, through the Trace," Hermione added, "put on all wands of young wizards."
Petunia nodded.
"Ah. I forgot," she said. She walked over to the nearby wall, and narrowed her eyes. She stuck her tongue out one corner of her mouth, as she quickly slashed a series of runes into the wallpaper. She then pressed her hand against it, and the Elvish runes glowed briefly, before they vanished.
"There," Petunia said with a nod, "that will prevent any magic from being able to sense anything within this house."
"You know magic?!" Harry gasped. Petunia turned and nodded.
"How else would we have kept magical items and tomes secret?" She asked. "Go ahead Fred, George. Cast a Stunning spell at me."
Both twins frowned.
"Er, are you sure ma'am?" Fred asked. "One Stunner is pretty strong-"
"And two at once, if they hit-" George tried.
Petunia pressed a finger to her chin, tilted her head, and smiled warmly. Her face softened as her eyes seemed to shine.
"Please~? You can use your weakest spells, if you're concerned about hurting me~," She simpered.
Ron stared with a slack jaw. Harry grimaced, as did Hermione. The Twins grinned, and raised their wands.
"Stupefy!" They cried. Two red stars of magic shot forth at Petunia. She swung Hadhafang at them like a cricket bat, and the two stars flew backwards and slammed into George and Fred. Both of them were slammed back into the wall, making the few pictures still hanging from them fall. Harry, Hermione and Ron were on their feet and heading over to the twins almost immediately.
"Fred? George? Are you all right?" Petunia called.
"Let me try," Hermione said, pulling out her wand, "Ennervate."
She tapped both of them, and Fred and George slowly awakened. They looked over at Petunia in amazement. As did Harry, for that matter. Petunia smiled, and as though reading their minds...
"Magical items of sufficient power can deflect magical spells, if you train to use your blade properly," she said.
Hermione had new respect in her eyes for Harry's aunt.
"Oh!" Hermione gasped, "so that's why Godric Gryffindor had a sword?"
"Probably," Petunia said, "though I don't know much about wizard history-Save where they made things worse for everyone else."
Ron winced, as did Harry.
"Now Harry, I'll have you start with deflecting from one wand at a time," Petunia said, "after you've rested ten more minutes. Ron, Hermione, I'd like you to work with him. Fred, George, would you kindly rehang the pictures please?"
"S-Sure Mrs. Dursley!" Fred said.
"As you wish, Mrs. Dursley!" George replied cheerfully, and they both got to work. Ron, Harry and Hermione sat back down on the couch and love seat respectively. Harry shook his head in amazement.
"I guess that's why you wanted to keep this magic hidden," he finally said to his aunt. He looked at her, "even from yourself?"
Petunia was silent for a moment, before she nodded.
"Yes," she admitted. "But I suppose there's not much point in hiding it now."
"Still, just because Harry found one powerful magical artifact doesn't mean you have to be so serious," Hermione said, "You-Know-Who is still a formless wraith. You act like he has to prepare for a war!"
Petunia fixed her eyes on the young girl.
"The reawakening of Anduril isn't just like turning on a light switch," Petunia said firmly, "the magical power it is giving off is now radiating across the world. Many things that have lain asleep for ages are waking up."
"That and it did turn Mrs. Dursley hot, Hermione," Ron pointed out.
"Thank you Ronald," Petunia replied.
Hermione scowled more deeply. Petunia rested a hand on her shoulder, and smiled comfortingly down at her.
"Your time will come," she said gently, "but don't be so affronted-A woman has many potential tools, including her mind. Don't neglect any of them, as I did."
"I, uh," Hermione stuttered.
"What does she mean?" Harry asked.
"N-Nothing!" Hermione squeaked.
There was a knock at the door. Petunia sighed.
"Excuse me for a moment," she said. She turned and headed out to the front door. She opened it, and frowned deeply.
"Albus, what are you doing here?" She asked. Dumbledore smiled wryly.
"Unfortunately I wasn't able to reach you via Floo-They couldn't find your fireplace, apparently," he said, "quite mysterious, really."
"Isn't it?" Petunia deadpanned. "Once again, what are you doing here?"
Dumbledore cleared his throat.
"I did at times employ your sister as a consultant on Middle Earth lore and magic," he explained, "and as I recall you were just as well versed-"
Petunia began to close the door.
"Petunia wait!" Dumbledore said, quickly sticking his face and foot in the door.
"Stop wasting my time and spit it out," Petunia hissed. Dumbledore coughed.
"Right, well... It seems the Malfoy family had a failed Ring of Power, and their only son put it on and... It cannot be removed."
Petunia stared at Dumbledore in disbelief.
"He did what?!"
It had taken Petunia a few minutes to shower and change. And a few more minutes for Harry to argue with Harry Hermione and Ron about why Petunia shouldn't bother saving Draco. Then several more minutes of Petunia arguing that they shouldn't come along... Which Petunia had failed. Eventually though, Petunia returned in her dress and her coat. Dumbledore smiled at Petunia as she girded her sword on.
"We'll just need to head over to-"
"Arabella Figg's, yes, I know," Petunia stated, imperious as a queen. "She's your spy and always has been."
"She has?!" Harry cried out. Dumbledore cleared his throat uncomfortably.
"She was here to keep an eye on you and make sure none of Voldemort's supporters were able to find you or do you harm," Dumbledore admitted, "I was going to tell you eventually-"
"Nevertheless, let's get going," Petunia stated primly, "come along. Fred, George, please stay. I made sandwiches for you."
"Sounds good to us!" Fred said cheerfully.
"You lot have fun fighting the untold horrors," George added, already tucking in.
"You guys are terrible," Hermione growled. The Twins just shrugged, as Petunia smiled.
"It's all right, Hermione. We have all we need. Come along. I suppose we'll be travelling via Floo?" She looked over at Harry. "What is that like?"
Harry winced.
"Um..."
A few minutes later, they emerged in a cold, marble laden mansion from an ornate fireplace. Harry fell over on his side, while Petunia landed on her face. Dumbledore, Hermione and Ron came through just fine.
"Are you all right, Petunia?" Dumbledore asked. Petunia stood up, brushing off her coat. She reached down and helped Harry back up, before she glared at the old Headmaster.
"Never. Again," she growled. "Haven't you idiots heard of airplanes?!"
"Would take too long, I'm afraid," Dumbledore said, almost cheerfully.
"I wouldn't mind the wait," Harry groaned. Hermione and Ron helped him up. He extended a hand to Petunia, which she waved off. She stood up and composed herself just in time for a tall, pale and long-haired blonde man to stride into the vast hall. Ron shot him a vicious glare, that the man ignored.
"Headmaster, a pleasure to see you," Lucius Malfoy said. He glanced over at Petunia. "And I take it you are Mrs. Petunia Dursley? The Deep Magic expert?"
"Yes," Petunia replied calmly, "at your service."
Lucius raised his pale brow higher at the trio of school children behind the two adults.
"Harry Potter, and… His friends?" He asked, confused.
"I am training Harry and his friends in my arts," Petunia explained, before Harry could say anything. "They may also aid in saving your son, given they are his school mates."
"Not by choice," Ron muttered, even as Hermione elbowed him. "Erk!"
"I see," Lucius murmured. He nodded. "Please, with me."
They followed him up stairs decorated in what appeared to be animated griffins and dragons made of marble, under a silver chandelier, to an ornate black, green and white hallway. They entered one of the nearest rooms, which was similarly furnished in such bland, but expensive looking decor. Though judging by the posters of the Holyhead Harpies and the Wiltshire Whirlwinds (the latter of which Ron snorted at), it had to be Draco's room.
A beautiful blonde woman was cradling something invisible in the bed. Something that left a boy-sized and shaped impression on the silken sheets. She looked up in shock as Petunia walked in, along with the three children, and Dumbledore.
"Headmaster Dumbledore?" She asked. "Why-This is the expert?"
"Yes," Lucius said. "Now, what would you-?"
"Stand aside, now," Petunia ordered, "we don't have time. Can you conjure ink?"
"I, yes-" Narcissa began.
"Then do it. Cover his hand," Petunia stated. Narcissa quickly waved her wand, and a small black cloud appeared. It fell, and a black trembling hand appeared where it landed. There was a ring on the pointer finger of the hand. Petunia nodded.
"All right," she said, "we just have to cut off the ring and he should be-"
"NO!" Draco shouted, and the black hand leaped. Ron and Harry, trying to guess where the rest of Draco was so they could block him, moved into the way. Hermione practically leaped aside as the boys moved forward. They both struggled as the flailing invisible boy tried to flee.
"Draco! DRACO! Stop that! They're trying to help you!" Lucius bellowed.
"DRACO! STOP!" Narcissa cried.
"Get him to the bed, quickly!" Petunia shouted. Ron and Harry bodily shoved the invisible boy back to the large bed. "Pin him down!"
Harry and Ron pinned him by his shoulders. Draco continued to cry out.
"N-NO! NO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS! THE RING IS MINE!" Draco shouted, "IT'S ALL MINE! YOU CAN'T TAKE IT FROM ME!"
All present felt a… Push on their minds. Like it was something to actually consider. Petunia shook her head furiously.
"Don't listen to him!" Petunia cried, "the ring is pushing him into the Wraith World! His magical strength is increasing, but it will consume him!"
"Draco, you want to get rid of the ring!" Harry tried, "you don't want to become a wraith! Nothing but a mean little ghost! That's what Voldemort became! Don't do it!"
"Maybe not as helpful, Harry!" Ron shouted. Lucius pulled out his wand.
"I'll just Stun him-"
"NO!" Petunia shouted, holding her hand up, "more magic on him will just accelerate the process!"
"NO! I WANT THE RING! I NEED IT!" Draco screamed. "LET ME GO! LET ME KEEP IT-!"
It was at this point Hermione walked up to the flailing invisible boy, guessed where his face was, and slapped it. His screams stopped, and the room went silent. Narcissa's Pureblood dignity vanished as her jaw dropped in shock, and Lucius's eyebrows were about to leap off his forehead.
"Listen you pampered, pompous little twat," Hermione growled, "you're going to give this ring up! You're always boasting about your lineage and power! Well what's it worth if you're going to be enslaved and made into a ghost by some little ring! A malfunctioning broken little ring! Where's your Malfoy pride, huh? Are you going to just let that ring rule over you? Or are you going to be a real wizard?"
Draco slowly stopped struggling, though Ron and Harry still held him down. Hermione took a few deep breaths, and nodded to the invisible boy.
Narcissa's face became a wry, knowing look: One she shared with her husband, who had also calmed down. Petunia's lip twitched, as Dumbledore's eyes just twinkled.
Naturally, Hermione and the other children didn't notice any of this.
"All right… Miss Petunia?" She asked.
"I'm going to need some help," Petunia said, drawing Hadhafang. "Dumbledore, Harry, Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy, please-Touch me, and focus your magic into me. You too, Ron and Hermione."
Everyone gathered around Petunia, save for Harry and Ron who held Draco down. Petunia moved up close, and she began to glow. Her skin shone like a full moon. She held her sword up, and flipped it to point down. The blade burned with white energy, and the ring glowed in reaction.
She held up Hadhafang. Harry could almost see stars shining in her eyes.
"NANKARI!" Petunia roared, thrusting the blade point down. At the last moment before the blade pierced Draco's finger, she twisted the sword-And the ring split apart. The two pieces fell off the bed, tumbling to the black carpeted floor, and burned away into ashes.
A very pale, sweaty, and exhausted Draco Malfoy appeared, fully visible, with a blackened hand. He breathed hard, shivering, underneath Harry and Ron. Both boys slowly pulled away, leaving the sallow faced Malfoy heir to try and catch his breath.
"Haa… Haa… Haa…"
Narcissa moved to hug Draco tightly. Lucius moved closer, and rested a hand on his son's shoulder. Hermione and Dumbledore moved back from Petunia… Who promptly fainted and fell forward.
"Aunt Petunia!" Harry cried, leaping up to catch her. "Nngh!"
"Take her to the room next door, I'll get the elves to bring up food and potions," Narcissa said. Harry and Dumbledore carried the unconscious woman out. A house elf appeared, and Narcissa gave her some directions. The little creature teleported away, before Narcissa fixed a grateful look to the strangers in her home.
"Thank you. Thank you so much."
"You have the eternal gratitude of the Malfoy Family," Lucius said, still arrogant but more subdued and sincere.
Hermione flushed, but managed a little curtsy. Ron shrugged, but managed a little bow. Draco looked up at his school rivals in disbelief. He swallowed some of his saliva, as he felt the expectant looks from his mother and father.
"Th… Thank you," he managed. Hermione's blush vanished, as she gave him a stoic expression.
"You're welcome," she said.
"Yeah, that," Ron managed. He shook his head. "Gotta say though… The Wiltshire Whirlwinds? Really? Those showboats?"
Draco narrowed his eyes. Despite his weakened state, the Malfoy scion was still able to look indignant.
"Better than the Cannons any day," Draco gasped back. "Least they can win."
Ron growled.
"You take that back!"
Hermione bit back a sigh, and pulled Ron out of the room.
"Let's go, we need to help Miss Petunia," Hermione said.
"But-The Cannons!" Ron whined.
"RON!"
Petunia slowly woke up, feeling wiped out. She saw an ornate ceiling of white marble, with silver lamps. She made a face.
"Ugh… It's all so… Tacky," she mumbled. She saw Harry slide into view over her, looking worried.
"Aunt Petunia? Are you all right?" He asked urgently.
Some strange little goblin like creature appeared, and forced a potion bottle into her mouth before she could answer. Petunia drank it down, and her exhaustion vanished with every gulp. The little creature pulled back, smiling with shiny teeth.
"Does Missuss need anything else?" It asked in a feminine voice.
"Uh… No, I'm fine," Petunia managed. The creature nodded, and then teleported away with a pop. Harry smiled in relief, as he looked down at his aunt.
"You… You're feeling okay, right?" He asked. Petunia slowly nodded.
"Yes," she managed. Dumbledore leaned into view, smiling.
"You've done a very good thing here, Petunia," Dumbledore said, "I regret that you never attended Hogwarts. You would have been exceptional."
"Yeah, I suppose I would have been," Petunia managed, still able to glare at Dumbledore. He chuckled.
"It's good to know that you remain acerbic and unpleasant-It means you're well on the way to recovery," Dumbledore said cheerfully.
"Bugger off," Petunia growled.
Dumbledore smiled and nodded.
"Before that though... When you've recovered, I hope you will join your nephew and other students at Hogwarts this semester? I have the feeling your services will be required."
"I'm not a teacher," Petunia snorted.
"No, but I will pay you as one," Dumbledore said. "As you require employment right now, why not?"
"Aunt Petunia?" Harry asked. "Please?"
Petunia sucked in a deep breath through her nostrils, and closed her eyes.
"... If only to prevent your usual wizarding stupidity from getting children killed? Fine," she said, "but no. Floo. Ever."
"Done and done," Dumbledore said cheerfully. "If you'll excuse me..."
He nodded to Harry, and exited the guest room out into the hallway. Harry watched him go, and then looked back at his pale aunt.
"Are you really okay, Aunt Petunia?" Harry asked. "What happened?"
The middle aged woman snorted dryly.
"I haven't used these arts in decades, that's what happened," Petunia replied. She shook her head, and sighed as she looked up at the ceiling again. "That's all. I had to make sure that the ring was destroyed. That required overloading it."
"And if it hadn't worked?" Harry asked. Petunia was silent. Harry scowled.
"You wouldn't be fulfilling your oath very well if you just died on me," Harry said.
"That wasn't my intention," Petunia sighed softly. She looked at her nephew and gave him a small, reassuring smile. "I'm not about to kill myself. I'm just… Not as strong as I thought I was."
Harry was silent for a time. He then reached out, and squeezed her hand.
"Then I'll just have to become strong enough you won't have to do this alone," he said.
Petunia closed her eyes and sighed despairingly.
"Still too kind, boy," she murmured.
"Yeah, I guess so," Harry said with a smile. "But you're not going to get rid of it."
"No," Petunia said softly, gently squeezing his hand back, "I suppose I won't."
And some more character development... Tell me what you think!