Scene 4: Main Characters Can't Die

Jack: in boat with guards...and then I do some foreshadowing! I'm totally psychic! Elizabeth splashes into the water in the background

Norrington: Elizabeth, are you done celebrating? Elizabeth? Realizes she feel into the ocean Elizabeth ! ZOMIGAWHD! rips off shirt like superman to reveal sexy!man chest

Gillette: stops him You're not superman! It's totally amazing that she didn't hit the rocks and die! It's probably because she's a main character. But you are a secondary character! You can't afford to jump!

Jack: Dudes, are you gonna save her?

Mullroy: Uh, no.

Jack: glances at Murtogg who stares back at him Right, I guess I will. I'm also a main character, and therefore am likely to not die. hands the guards his effects Lose them and I break you in half with my karate skillz. dives in to save Elizabeth

the medallion calls to the Black Pearl, making a big boomish type noise that starts up a hurricane and such which is the very subtle clue that something is going to happen.

Murtogg: Dude, WTF? helps Jack with Elizabeth OMG She's not breathing!

Jack: Move! Jack hip-checks Murtogg and slices open Elizabeth's corset, letting her immediately gasp and basically look like a dead fish, only beautifulMullroy: Whoa, cool trick.

Jack: It's all the rage in Singapore. Apparently, they also have corsets, and since I probably haven't been there in awhile and corsets seem to be a new trend in London, Singapore must be more trendy than London, savvy? Notices Elizabeth's shiny!coin and fingers it in awe How the heck did a beautiful girl like you get this?

Norrington: to Jack, pointing his sword at him Back off my soon-to-be fiancée, bitch!

Governor Swann: helps Elizabeth up Elizabeth! Has this corrupted you in any way?

Elizabeth: No, I'm still innocent at this point, father

Governor Swann: sees Murtogg holding Elizabeth's corset and almost pops a blood vessel; Murtogg points at Jack; Swann looks over at Jack and almost has a heart attack Kill that bitch! He could have made my daughter less innocent!

Elizabeth: Father! Commodore, can you really kill him? I mean, he saved my life.

Norrington: jealous! My apologize, let's shake and make up. offers his hand to shake; reveals 'P' for pirate on Jack's wrist Aw snap, I can't believe you fell for that. Beckett burned you did he? Not that I know Beckett. No one knows Beckett… yet. Mauhhahahaha!

Governor Swann: Looks curiously at Norrington Would you just hang him already?

Norrington: Right, sorry. Keep pointing your guns at him. Bitch number one, put handcuffs on him. sees tattoo of a sparrow in flight Well, well... a Sparrow… that means you must be Jack Sparrow, because it couldn't possibly mean anything else.

Jack: Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy?

Norrington: Yeah right, Captain's have ships. And you ain't got one. What now?

Jack: grumblegrumble

Murtogg: He told us he was gonna steal one!

Mullroy: See! I told you sexy men don't lie about anything. hands him Jack's effects These are his.

Norrington: You have one shot… your compass is totally fed up, and, no wait, damn, your sword is okay. But seriously, what kind of freaking pirate are you?

Jack: Well, hey, you knew who I was. is pulled along to be put in chains

Elizabeth: Commodore, hello! I told you not to do anything to him!

Norrington: Ignore the girl. Keep locking him up or he won't be able to have a daring escape, not that he could 'cause he's a sucky pirate.

Elizabeth: He still totally saved me.

Norrington: Okay, but think of all the other things he's done. You are safe, but the other things are totally inexcusable. Besides, I'm a commodore; I have to make sure I can keep my hero status.

Jack: Hero? You aren't even a main character.

Norrington: STUF n00b. Gillette moves away from Jack

Jack: BONDANGE! throws his irons around Elizabeth 's neck

Governor Swann: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Jack: I knew you thought I was sexy! Commodore, give me my stuff back and I won't do naughty things with your little girlfriend here.

Elizabeth: Obviously pissed Excuse me?

Jack: Now, darling, please put these back on my body while I hold this pistol to your head, it excites me. And be careful not to damage any of my sexy body parts. she straps on his sword, puts on his hat, etc.

Elizabeth: I thought pirates were supposed to sweep you off your feet.

Jack: Not today, love. I saved your ass now you're saving mine, savvy? Gentlemen, beautiful girl, this is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught sexy man! I mean, Captain Jack Sparrow! pushes Elizabeth away and escapes, swinging around and landing on a beam above their heads

Governor Swann: OMFG shoot him already!

Norrington: Open fire! Jack is shot at, but of course he doesn't get hit because he is indeed the mainest of the main characters Follow him! Bitch number one, that man is seriously going to die tomorrow. You make sure we catch him or I's gonna be pissed.

Soldier: the soldiers run around searching for Jack Look everywhere except the blacksmith's shop! There's no way he'll hide there!