Scene 12: Okay, So You Can't Say It's A Fairy Tale Anymore...
Pintel: Barbossa said you must eat with him tonight. And you have to wear this dress for no reason. gives her a dress
Elizabeth: Well, you tell him that I am opposed to assent to his demand.
Pintel: He said you'd use that button again. He also said then fine, you eat with us and you're naked! HAHAHA I GET TO SEE A NAKED WOMAN! Elizabeth snatches the dress Damn.
in the Captain's cabin, the food is laid out
Barbossa: Elizabeth eats daintily Bitch please, you know you're starving. Elizabeth stares at the food and then rips into it. Barbossa watches her with this creepy lusty look, like he wants to have sex with her eating. I don't mean sex with her WHILE she's eating, I mean… well, it's creepy, okay? He gives her a goblet with wine Drink this. Yes… oh yes… now please, have an apple. offers her one
Elizabeth: Oh shit, you poisoned it! Just like that story!
Barbossa: No… don't stop…
Elizabeth: … Why do you need me around anyway, besides watching me eat?
Barbossa: takes out the shiny!coin Do you have any idea what this is?
Elizabeth: Yes. shifty eyes It's a shiny!coin. A pirate dealy.
Barbossa: True. But it's also Aztec gold. There are 882 pieces of it. And it's cursed!
Elizabeth: Psh, please. I don't believe in fairy tales.
Barbossa: That's funny. A second ago you were thinking I poisoned the apple like in a fairy tale… but anyway, it really is cursed. Anyone who steals one of these gets to live in hell on earth. And my crew, we took all of them! And then we realized we couldn't eat, or drink rum, or have sex… I mean, we COULD… but we always wanted more. We need more! Elizabeth takes a butter knife and hides it which is lame, because it's a BUTTERKNIFE! Hello! The only way we can enjoy life's pleasures again is to get all the shiny!coins together, and put our blood on the gold. And this is the very last coin we needed, if you haven't gotten that by now.
Elizabeth: So you need MY blood?
Barbossa: Duh. Elizabeth stabs him with the knife; he takes it out and it is covered with very fake blood extremely high on the knife for how far she probably could have shoved it in Yeah… good plan. After you kill me, you can kill all of my crewmates! And then, since you don't know anything about ships, you can swim to shore! she runs out and sees the pirates, all decaying skeletons Look at them! We're really cursed pirate skeletons hahaha! It's been too long, bitch! You're gonna give us your blood and then I can get drunk and have sex again! drinks and it pours over his ribs, laughs and the crew laughs with him Hey! I didn't tell you to laugh!
Pirates: Yes, sir, sorry sir.