Chapter 2: Pent-Napage!?!

Rating T

Disclaimer: Dont own FE, we OWN Ozzie the Bear bisnitch!!! -snaps in a z-shaped formation-

It was a clear, sunny day. The birds were chirping and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. There on this sunny day, on a random mountain, in a random part of Elimagellius, sat a cute little cottage which currently was housing Louise and Pent. Louise was sitting by a cute heart shaped window that she forced Pent to make last week. Because she is one of those nagging wives that seem sweet when your dating, but once you get married she turns into ultra-bitch? yeah.

She was sitting by her heart shaped window knitting and occasionally looking at the scenery...which right now consisted of a beatiful lake with the cute mutant fishies where the water was a nice beautiful shade of toxic purple. Oh, and you can't forget the nice burnt forest full of charred tree stumps and ashes. Just that week that had been a nice forest with cute little squirrels running everywhere. Poor squirrels. Ozzie the bear (Smokey's Elimagellius counterpart) would have a field day with Pent and his random arsonist moments...that is, if Ozzie hadn't of been cooked for dinner last night. Louise sighed and went back to her knitting.

Currently she was knitting Pent a new scarf. A bright orange and puke green scarf. Why does he need a scarf? Who knows. But that will probably be the next thing to go during his next arsonist attack. Currently, said arsonist was going out and "getting more firewood". Well, they already had a big 10ft tall pile in back so that was his lame excuse to get out and burn more forests down. He would probably come back sopping wet about 2 hours later and leave no explanation. Sometimes she wondered about that husband of hers.

Well anyway, in the middle of the burnt clearing sat a figure clad in a bright orange cape that reads "I'm not a husband stealer". There wasn't exactly many places to hid in the middle of a burnt clearing so they were sorta just sitting there. Smack dab in the middle. Why didn't Louise see them? We're going to figure this out in a multiple choice answer!!! wh00t!!!

A.:) She a dumbass

B :) She can't see shit but refuse to get glasses because they're 'unstylyish' and yes, unstylyish IS a word, or

D :) All of the above

Answer: D

Because everyone knows D) is the right answer to everything!!!! Well, either way, about 2 hours later Pent started walking up the only long, narrow, windy road up to the cabin having started 3 forest fires, 2 riots, and 4 lake toxinings...When he saw...A BOOK OF MATCHES!!!! Perfect, untouched matches just waiting to be lit. Sitting there all alone in the middle of the road!!! Egasp!!! He ran over to the matches only to have run right onto on eof htose genereic traps they always used to use on Poke'mon where you fall into a big hole in the ground covered in dirt.

About five minutes later her woke up from his 5 minute state of unconsiousness to find..."MATCHES!!!! WHOOTAGE!!!!" and he pocketed them quickly...only to find that he was in a random hole in the ground!!! "EGASP!!!!" He gasp'd and then on the top of the hole the culprit looked down to see her victim...Now would be the glorious time to gloat, brag, and in this case, kidnap said sage.

"OMIGOD!!! WHERE'S PENT!!!!?" Louise said randomly from her stitching. She looked around and Pent wasn't there. Oh well. That stupid arsonist would come back eventually...OR WILL HE? DUN DUN DUUUUUN!!!!!

"Pwahahahahahah! You fell for my trap!!" The orange cape clad person also known as '?' screamed from atop the hole.

"Ehm...who the hell are you?" Pent asked looking up from his matches.

"Hmm...well, we'll make this multiple choice because everyone LOVES multiple choice!!! I'm

A :) The boogeyman

B :) Your mom

C :) A pancake or

D :) None of the above?" ? asked

"Hmmm...is it...C?"

"WRONG!!!!! THE ANSWER IS ALWAYS D WITH MULTIPLE CHOICE YOU DUMBASS!!!!!!" and she threw a rock at him.

"But...I still don't know who you are!! Just tell me dammit!!!" Pent yelled

"Um...no?" And with that she threw another rock at him. This one knocking him unconsious.

"Maybe I should look for Pent. He has been gone really long and I don't see him anywhere!" Louise said to nobody in particular. She looked out ther heart shaped window and decided to look for Pent because otherwise she would be sitting in her cottage rocking back and forth in the fetal position until he came back. Which could be days from now. So, she grabbed her bow and 2 arrows because she's a dumbass and didn't want to hold more than two. Then she ran outside to look for her arsonist husband.

? was currently walking away from the hole where Pent was, as in, isn't anymore, carrying behind her a big burlap sack with what appeared to be a dead body in it walking torwards the cottage taht Louise was currently walking away from. Seeing as there is only one windy, narrow road going from the cottage to the bottom of the mountain chances are...They're going to run into each other.

About 20 minutes later Louise came running down the mountain with only 1 arrow left. How she lost the other one? Who really cares. Either way, she finally ran into ? who was walking at a much slower pace because of her burlap sack.

"Excuse me. Have you seen a mage/sage walking around named Pent? Silver hair...probably burning things..." Louise said

"Hmmm..." ? said as she pulled the burlap sack down to show what was inside.

"Does he look anything like...THIS!?!" and in the bag was Pent.

"Why yes..Yes he does!! Have you seen him?" Louise asked oblivious to the fact that Pent was in the bag

"YOU DUMBASS!!!!! THIS IS PENT!!!!" ? yelled.

"Why do you want Pent? I know your not a hussband stealer because your cape says so...so why?!" Louise cried currently breaking into tears for no apparent reason.

It was merely a disguise!! I really AM a husband stealer!!!! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" ? laughed maniacly

"Husband stealer? What the hell does that even mean?" Louise yelled.

"..What you thing it means bitch!!!" and with that? pulled the hand gun from the holder on her leg and shot Louise in the arm.

"But...can you at least tell me..." She coughs up a little blood

"Who you...are?" she says weakly because right now her already low HP is down to like, 5.

"Well...I'm not Ismaire!!!" And then Not Ismaire capped Louise with a bullet through her forehead and walked away, twirling the gun in her hands. Louises's limp body fell down to her knees, with blood now openly spewing out her forehead. She fell face first into the gravel.

OOO dramatic!!! wow...that ended kinda...dramatic...seeing as the whole thing was cracked up...oh well. the next chapter might actually have...A PLOT!!!! GASP!!! possibly. oh well. Its basically made to advance our little plot. R&R DAMMIT!!!!!! Z

to Zetsuke and ForensicDuelist4137:

Whootage!!! Reviews!!! -gives you cyber cookie- thankee for being our first two reviewers!!!! If you have any suggestions on character OOCs feel free to let us know!!!!