Disclaimer Time: I do not own the Redwall series and hold no copyright authority over any books written by Brian Jacques. This story is not meant to suggest anything about the Redwall universe nor is it meant to be interpreted as such. Blah blah, yada, yada, please enjoy.

Prologue

Why hello there, weary traveler. Have you come to hear another story? Yes, well it just so happens I have found another story of Redwall. Yes, it appears that name had struck a chord in your mind. Sit, sit down. Mind, I haven't gotten very far in it as of yet, so I think we're both in for a surprise. From what I could gather, it is not your ordinary tale. Now let's see… Ahem…

Part One

"He's a skinny lil' one!"

Rain came down in torrents, pounding down on the cloaked figures trudging along the path. One of them stopped for only a minute to sedate the crying babe bundled in her arms.

"Hey, child, i's all right." The former's feminine voice cooed, "Calm yore mouth down now, ye don't hafta be yellin' in me ear like that."

"Keep movin' woman!" The latter rumbled, motioning for the path, "I ain't waitin' here for my fur to water-log."

The lady quickened her pace, "Are ye shore we can't keep 'im?" She asked, her tone pleading, "It ain't like 'ee eats much, an' he's just the sweet-"

"You questionin' me woman?" the lady said nothing, and under the cloak averted her eyes, "Ah told you, he ain't gonna be fit fer the life of no vermin! We put 'im through the test; 'Ee'd be better off with the bunnies than makin' a fool o' me!"

"Aw but where's he gonna go?" she complained, holding the bundle up to her counterpart, "Do ye think a face like this'd be any bit'is menacin' wit' out us?"

"Ya still questioning me?" he growled, watching her quail under his gaze. His face softened, "Like ah said, 'ee'd be better off wit the bunnies, so we gonna drop 'im off with the bunnies, an' the mice, an' the otters, an' all dem fluffy lil' animals."

The woman stopped and stomped her foot in the sludge, "Wit' those beasts? Ee'll never stay dere! They won't accept him there, ne'er in a mil'ion seasons dey won'!"

She said no more at his menacing glare, "We're droppin' 'im off at one'o'dem 'oly places, a "Nabby" er wa'ever they call it. If'n dey don' take 'im, den ee's none o' there problem, but either way, neither do we, uh?"

His pointed ear pricked at the sound of approaching footsteps, "We're close 'nuff to the Nabby; drop 'im off 'ere where dey can see 'im and make yerself scarce."

They bounded off into the woods, leaving behind their thrashing, screaming bundle, moments before the other pair of walkers appeared on the road to the Abbey.

"Blinkin' capital idea, wot!" The hare complained, mocking the other's voice, "Le's go fer a walk outta de h'Abbey, Oi thinks eez goonabe a noice day.' I'm soaked through to me poor bones, chap, and me blinkin' tummy ain't had food for ages, wot." He then fell to the road, "Go on wit'out me Blinky, and Tell de Abbot ah collapsed from hunger, wot!"

Blanka tried to pull his friend from the mud, "Moi name's no' Blinkeh, ees Blankah, an' wot yew mean yew no' h'eat in ages?" The mole struggled to move his portly friend, Yoo 'ad dem h'apple puddens, an' dem meadowcreamy troifles, an' yoo h'ate doze strawbee scones wile yoo were walkin'. Git yoorself bahck oin yoor foo'paws!"

"I think I see the bloomin' tunnel, old chap, that light's comin' for me, Blinky ol' pal. Tell me old gel, I…I…" He looked up at the bundle in the mud, "Wot's that there?" He hopped to his feet, instantly revived, and picked it up from the mud, "I say, it's a lil' Dibbun, and quite an unusual one at that, wot. Let's get him to Ol' man Abbot, afore my ears get shocked out here."

1

"My goodness! You two are a mess!"

The two beasts were dripping wet by the time they had marched into the Abbot's office. Blanka Shook himself off quite messily, then bowed apologetically.

"Zorry Father h'Abbot," he squeaked, "Boora 'ere foundin a lil' Dibbun n' we wann'end to giv'im to yoo."

"A Dibbun?" Abbot Celix stared at them with incredulence, "Boora, if you're going to tell me it's yours…"

"Wot?" Boora hopped once, indignant, "Were you not the Abbot I'd 'ave a jolly well mind to call you on that, rest assured, wot wot! We found the beast out side the walls while trudgin' for our lives in that hella storm out there. I blinkin' nearly lost my life keepin' the lil' Dibbun safe."

The child was now on the Abbot's desk, still fidgeting around in the thin blanket and snoring softly. "I will think this over, you two call Sister Zontia to me please, and get out of those clothes. You're leaving a stream in the hallways."

After a few minutes, Sister Zontia opened the door to the Abbot's study. Celix opened up by saying, "We have a new Dibbun in our walls that needs sheltering."

"A Dibbun?" The sister replied then began giggling, "Aww, congratulations! I didn't think a holy man like you would…"

Celix raised one finger to stop her. For an otter seasons older than he was, she could act quite childish, "It's not mine." He assured her, "A couple of the Redwallers found him in the rain tonight."

"Ah, I see." She said, obviously disappointed that she would have no rumors to spread tomorrow, "Is there something special about this baby, is that why you'd call me?" she asked hopefully, her eyes glittering with child-like enthusiasm.

The Abbot unwrapped the bundle, bringing the snoozing kid before her.

"She's a-"

"He." The Abbot corrected, "And yes, he's a vermin."

Zonita thought it over for a second, "Are you sure?"

"Sure it's a vermin?"

"Sure it's a boy. I mean, it's a little…scrawny for a boy, dontcha think?"

"Focus, Sister, focus!"

"Sorry Father," She picked up the Dibbun, "So what do you intend to do with it?"

"No, that's why I asked for you."

Zonita rocked the little fox back and forth, "My grand-otter used to say…" He began imitating an old man's voice, "'Zonnie, vermin's just another name fer a wildbeast what not speak good. If'n we can teach 'em to be all nice n' chummy, who knows what we can do.' Then he'd begin cackling that evil grand-otter cackle. That always scared me, gave me nightmares in fact. I remember this one time…"

"Zonita."

"And…I…oh, sorry…"

Abbot Celix took the Dibbun from her, "You don't really need to apologize; you made a fine point right up until you started talkin' about cackling. I think if we wanna keep him here, though, were going to have to watch him extremely carefully.

"Well, that goes without saying!" Zonita said, enthusiastically picking up the baby, "You hear that, little one? You get to stay here! You lucky…um…fox? Oh, I walked into that one?" She turned to the Abbot, "Are you really sure it's a boy? I had such a nice name reserved for a girl."

"If you wanna check, be my guest; I assure you he's a boy."

The Sister giggled, "Well, what if he's hermaph…"

Celix rose to his feet, laughing as he chased her out, "None of that Sister Zonita! No talking like that! Not im my Abbey!"