Were We Written in the Sand

...

Kise poochun hai aisa kyun

Bezuban sa yeh jahan hai

Abhijeet was standing at the corner of a cliff leaning against the fence in the cold month of winter. Everything around him was silent yet so beautiful and breath taking but his breathes were still held captive in that picture with flower girdle in that house.

He let her go away from him which was as eqaul as drinking poison just to make her life easy and here he came to know about the bitter truth. Tarika's lifeless face was roaming in front of him again and again. It's evidient that she's not over the death yet. How could she? Was it even possible? He left her everything behind to lead a life with that man and she's herself left behind like this.

His heart sank thinking about Tarika's condition more and more. She was all by her side. There's no one. How did she manage? He wanted to ask so many questions. He wanted to shout on her for not letting anyone know about this. He could understand why he wasn't enlightened about the incident. He had earned that himself but why not anybody else! Why she endured all the sufferings alone? Why?

Khushi ke pal kahan dhoondun

Be nishan sa waqt bhi yahan hai

Abhijeet remembered thei sweet memories, how they were inseperable throughout the years. And then he recalled Tarika's gradually changing behaviour and his ignorance. He remembered the night he lost her to Abhinav and closed his eyes in agony. He still couldn't bear it. He went through the pains he gave her in following days and also the ones he endured. Hell! Hell! Hell! It all had been a hell for him. He remembered her last goodbye. Though broken he had wished her all the happiness of the world and here she was now, all broken.

Here at the terrace of Bureau Tarika was also leaning against the railing wearing a light green colour saree.

Jaane kitne labon pe gile hai

Zindagi se kai faasle hain

She remembered all the moments she cried over Abhijeet, her marraige with Abhinav and also the moment he left Abhijeet and her everything behind to do justice with her marraige, with Abhinav.

Base jitte hain sapne kyun aankhon mein

Lakeerein jab chhoote in haathon se yun bewajah

Tarika recalled how Abhinav supported her all the way and also how earnestly she dedicated herself into the marriage only to get disheartened by the cruel fate. Everything vanished in front of her eyes in a blink. She always felt she didn't deserve happiness after what she did to Abhijeet. Although things were pretty inevitable she always believed Abhijeet didnt deserve what he got. And so she was never able to be happy fully. But she had to be happy for Abhinav, for Abhika. But everything's finished. And she blamed herself. She blamed herself for ruining Abhijeet's life, breaking his heart.

Jo bheji thi Duaa

Woh jaake aasman se yun takra gayi

Ke aa gayi hai laut ke sadaa

She remembered how she cried over Abhinash's dead body holding her 2 years old daughter. She felt vacant that day. She needed a friend, a family but no one was there. And she couldn't gather courage to involve them in her pain either.

Here Abhijeet recalled his past too. He felt all his sacrifices to keep her happy went in vain. He cried his heart out.

Jo bheji thi duaa

Woh jaake aasman se yun takra gayi

Ke aa gayi hai laut ke sadaa

W_W_W_I_T_S

0

After years Abhijeet entered into the forensic lab with a hope to see her. His eyes wandered around and settled on her brifely, only to look away after a couple of seconds. She was unimpressed with his presence, busy in her work. She along with her senior explained the forensic details of the dead body and excused herself for the rest room. Abhijeet took a deep breath.

Tarika finished her work and walked towards the parking lot. Abhijeet was standing near her car. Tarika expected him to make a move and she was preparing herself too. She wanted to be done with it too. She's tired to conceal it within her for so long.

"We can have a coffee somewhere." She proposed in a very formal way. She had own him an explination and unlike last time she would do it right away.

Abhijeet nodded with a lump in his throat and got into the car.

Throughtout the journey Abhijeet avoided any type of eye contacts with her. Tarika was glancing him every now and then but he simply refused to acknowledge that. Tarika sighed. Tarika had always been a strong girl. She hardly cried. Of all the persons Tarika cried for Abhijeet was on the top of the list. He made her more vulberable than anyone else. Abhinav's death wasn't a sudden incident. So when he died she was prepared. Her relationship was different with Abhinav and when she lost him she lost more than a husband. But Abhinash had her prepared. Still, she couldn't deny the vacant feeling in her heart after his deperture.

They settled on a small coffee table for two at the corner of a small road side coffee shop. They ordered coffee and didn't speak till the coffee arrived. They both found an object to focus their attention on instead of the person sitting next to each other. Tarika started stiring the coffee while Abhijeet was simply gazing him cup.

"I'm fine Abhijeet." Tarika started with very first thing he might wanted to know. "Trust me."

"Trust you?" Abhijeet said with a mild rag. "Trust you with what? That you would ask for help if you need? That you will keep yourself happy?"

"I am not to be blamed here Abhijeet. I haven't chosen this for me." Tarika said calmly.

Abhijeet felt guilt. She's right. But he wasn't able to voice his querry. He actually wanted to know why she didn't let any of them know.

"I left everything behind, like a selfish person, to decorate my life. How could I go back asking for support? I felt that I deserved to go through this pain alone."

"Don't lie Tarika. You never left for yourself. It was halfy because of Abhinav and halfy... for me." Abhijeet whispered the last part.

"True. But also for myself. I wanted to give all three of us a chance."

Abhijeet didn't speak right away. He was boiling inside.

"It's because of me, isn't it?" Abhijeet asked looking down, griting his theeth like a stubborn kid. "You thought I would..."

"No Abhijeet." Tarika said before he could say it aloud. "Don't ever think so. I have forgotten every thing you did to me."

"Then why Tarika?" Abhijeet looked up at her. " Fine, you didnt wanted me to know. You could have talked to Daya or at least even Dr salunke."

Tarika sighed. It'd never been easy to make a stubborn Abhijeet understand something.

"I was enough for myself. Like always." Tarika wanted to dismiss the topic and made Abhijeet felt distant in a fraction of second. He understood there's no room for him in her life, not even as a person she knows let alone as a friend.

"Abhinash was diagnosed with a brain cancer, last stage. He was given 6 months to live. We were prepared. Abhinav gave me all the support I needed like always. I wont lie, I did want to let you all know. But when my mom proposed the same thing I felt enragged. Idk, may be I blamed her for distanding me from all of you. Abhijeet I..." Tarika was speaking looking down and when she looked up to meet his gaze she found him crying, sobbing like a baby, sitting in front of her.

A drop of tear rolled down her eyes as she realized the person sitting next to her still harvoured the same feeling for her he used to have years ago. She understood more than anything he had complaints of not being able to share her pain. His feelings were pure. His guilts were even purer.

Tarika smiled ruefully. She's not even finished with her story and he's crying like this. How she wished she hadn't met him again. She knew he would never move on but she at least hoped his feelings would go numb. And here he was, behaving like this.

Abhijeet excused himself for washroom. Tarika pushed away her cold coffee. She thought to order again but the shop's gonna close soon and they also needed to hurry.

Abhijeet returned with red eyes.

"Sorry," he said taking his seat.

"I can understand." Tarika smiled. "I have gotten over it Abhijeet. Sure, i dont feel triumph or like contempt but its okay. I dont even want to feel those. Abhika fills my empty space. Life is going on."

"Come back to Mumbai Tarika." Abhijeet demanded.

"I would never Abhijeet. Don't even try. I can't."

Abhijeet wanted to argue but remembered he had no rights. She didnt even acknowledge him as her friend anymore.

"How's aunty?" Abhijeet wanted to know.

"Must be doing good in heaven."

Abhijeet looked at her shocked. Too surprised to even shed tears.

"What are you.."

"6 months after Abhinash's death."

"Tarika.. you.."

"I had chosen this life for myself where I refused anyone's attention from Mumbai. I felt cheap to go back there after leaving everything."

"We are like a family Tarika. We would have never judged."

"I know. Its me. I couldn't make myself admit it." Tarika shrugged.

"If I hadn't done all those things or behaved like an idiot you were leaving in Mumbai."

"May be yes. May be no. Who knows Abhijeet? Don't blame yourself."

"And I was thinking all along you were happy with Abhinash."

"I was. And I am not doing so bad right now either. Anyways, lets go. Abhika is waiting for me. There's a lot of time to catch up later."

Tarika stood up. Abhijeet took his time and followed her outside the caffe.

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KK: Hola! Long time no see pals! I actually wanted to discontinue the story but as I am having a week off for Eid I have updated this. I dont know when I am gonna update next. May be sooner, or later. Who knows.

EID MUBARAK GUYS. Don't forget to leave a review.