Annoyed!
Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy, nor will I ever!
Dear Readers: I am so sorry I haven't updated this story before now. Yes I realize that it had been two years before this update and it kind of sucks! LOL! Unfortunately I have had so much to do and so much going on that my real life did not permit me to continue my writing! Thankfully, however, my writing is starting up again. So be prepared to read, read, read!! LOL! Let me know what you think of the story so far. I am not going to give hints to what happens. You will just have to catch the next chapter!
Baralai couldn't believe that after three years of pain and torment that he was putting himself back into a place that was bound to hurt him in the long run. He felt that he didn't deserve to be around her and for that matter his friends. Actually he knew he didn't! That day he almost killed them had really did a number on his heart and soul. Although he had tried for three years, he couldn't forgive himself for allowing that to happen. There must have been a way he could have prevented it. Something he could have done that would have ensured the safety of those he loved. In all truth he wasn't really worried about himself. He would have gladly died that day, and if he could live that day over again, he would have allowed that to happen. Death had to be better than what meager existence he was living now. No friends! No real life! Just staying hidden and moping!
As they stepped outside, dusk had just begun to fall. He knew that if they didn't hurry the market was going to close. If that happened, he would have to deal with Paine meddling in his life tomorrow. Of course it wasn't that he didn't try to appreciate what she was trying to do, but he had shut off his feelings a long time ago. He could almost guarantee that those feelings would stay shut off.
Baralai quickened his step, not really caring whether Paine was keeping up. Unfortunately he remembered that she had long legs and could keep up with just about anyone. As he walked, he thought about the past three years. He hadn't really bothered anyone with his thoughts and feelings, so he was sure that no one had a clue at the guilt he had been feeling as well as the pain of watching his friends continue with their normal lives. Walking into the market five minutes before closing was a really bad idea, but he had no other choice if he wanted her to go away and leave him alone.
"What are you rushing for? We have time!" Paine reached forward and grabbed his arm. A small zing ran up her arm almost causing her to drop his arm. She longed to pull him against her and make him forget his problems by seducing him. However, in the long run, she was sure he would never forgive her for something like that.
"Time?" He stopped in the middle of the aisle and turned to face her. "No Paine…we don't have time! We have five minutes to get everything we need. Not everyone likes to do things at the last minute!" He looked around quickly and said quietly, "Let's split up! I will get food and you get cleaning stuff." Not waiting for her answer, he walked away as if he couldn't wait to get away from her.
Paine was so confused. Before she joined the Gullwings, they had been really close almost to the point of her thinking he would propose. Unfortunately so much has happened since then and it hurt to know he was alone and hurting all the time. She would love to soothe that pain away for him. Hold him and kiss him until he forgets everything but her. As she walked towards a stall selling cleaning supplies she couldn't help but hope that Baralai wouldn't kick her out as soon as they got back. She had only made a little bit of a dent in his house.
The moment she walked up to the door she smelt the stink that obviously came from the trash and left over food all over the house, as well as the laundry that had piled up. For the life of her, Paine could never begin to understand why guys insisted on living in such filth. Grabbing one of everything, she paid and headed towards the food part of the market. She was sure that Baralai would buy food that wasn't really healthy.
For the passed few years, Spira had been coming out with portable food packages that allows people a little freedom along the way of cooking. Paine had to admit that being able to pull out one of those packages and just popping it into the little oven was really nice when she didn't feel like slaving over a meal. If she had to say, it was perfect for those single people who had no one to share a meal with. Unfortunately, Paine belonged to that group. Not that she minded much, since she normally was a loner. Guessing that this was a weird situation, she couldn't begin to explain why she insisted on being around Baralai. In a way, he seemed like a loner to her, especially in the last few years.
Glancing around, she noticed him as he stood talking to one of the vendors. She could just barely make out his face from the side, but the side she was seeing looked gorgeous. His back muscles were lean and his shoulders broad. She longed to run her hands and nails down his back towards his luscious butt. Actually she had a lot more in mind, but she would just have to wait for that. "We will take three of everything!" She hadn't waited for him to ask her to join. If he wasn't going to take care of his life, she was just going to step in and take over.
He gave her a dirty look as he watched the vendor package the items she just ordered. "So who is going to eat all of this? I can't eat it all before it spoils." He had dreaded even asking, but he couldn't help asking. She was basically saying with the purchase that she planned on being in his life for the next week at least. It wasn't as if his body minded a beautiful woman around, but his heart and soul did mind. How could he possibly begin to try and get over the fact he almost killed his friends…well…his old friends…with her around? He would have to work ten times harder to hide his feelings. Actually, he couldn't really decide whether it was the invasion of his life and privacy that he was upset about or whether the invasion was going to be by a woman he wanted any way he could get her. It would be calling himself a liar if he didn't admit that the woman standing next to him didn't stir a longing in him.
All he knew was the next few days were going to be torture by having to deal with hiding his want for Paine and having to deal with someone always being around. He could actually feel that she was going to suggest that she stay over and it was completely rude for him to tell her no. She was going to help him clean up his house, which he didn't realize was getting so bad. Plus, she had a cute ass, but he wasn't getting on that subject since he would think of her in his bed. Way to go Baralai! Got yourself thinking of that! "Let's just go! I think this is enough food." He forced himself not to grab the bag away from the vendor and stomp away. It would be like throwing a tantrum in the middle of the store when you were six to get what you wanted. What he wanted was simple. One was to be left alone and the second was Paine on his bed with him between her legs. Neither was going to happen obviously, but he had to hope!
They made their way towards his house without speaking. Each step held more dread for him. Each step was a sign that he wasn't going home alone. Each reminded him that he was getting shook out of his little world whether he liked it or not. That day when Shuyin possessed his body and made him control Vegnagun was the worst day of his life. He had almost been the animal that killed his friends. Thankfully they ended it and he didn't have to live with the fact of killing them. In all truth…living with the thought of that possibility was enough of a heart ache. Some might think he was overreacting a bit to the whole situation, but in his mind, he wasn't. How could anyone know if they hadn't been in the same situation? They couldn't and thanks to Yuna and the Gullwings, they wouldn't ever have to find out.
Paine watched the different feelings cross his face. Despair. Hurt. Anger. And what really hurt her was that she hasn't been able to figure out a way to help him. Each day of the passed three years she had worried. He meant everything to her. He was the only person that actually knew her. And what made things worse was that she hurt just as much as him through this whole ordeal. That day she couldn't believe what was happening. At first she thought it was him really controlling it. After everything they had been through, she couldn't understand why he would want to do away with it all. A sense of thankfulness came when they found out he was possessed, but when she looked into his eyes and saw that the man she loved was no longer there, it hurt her to the core. She still saw that every day and up until now she had no clue what she was going to do.
"Let's get to work!" She knew she startled him when she spoke since he jumped. Paine didn't even wait for him to answer. She just walked into the house. Even as she stepped in, she still smelt the nasty stench. Most of it had gone away and she knew that by the end of the night, all of it would be gone. "Alright, you start in the living room unless you want to do laundry, while I work on the kitchen? Here!" She handed him one of the boxes of trash bags. "Some of this stuff can't be cleaned even if we wanted it to. So just throw it away!" She turned and walked into the kitchen. As she started scooping up trash, she listened for sounds of him moving. She didn't want to force him into doing something he didn't want to do, but this was unhealthy. Since she loved him, it was her job to help him. Right before she dropped her bag on the floor, the noise of a trash bag being opened made it to her ear. "Good!" She said under her breath and continued to work. "Now we can get some work done!"