Saving Me Chapter 4: Welcome To My Life, a high school musical fanfic

DISCLAIMER: I do not own High School Musical or any related characters.

A/N: Hi guys! Thanks for all the great reviews; it's such a thrill to know someone's appreciating my writing! Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it!

Saving Me

CHAPTER 4

WELCOME TO MY LIFE

Gabriella stared at her half-eaten bowl of cereal, her spoon dangled loosely in her hand, her mind completely blank. At that current moment Gabriella was devoid of any emotion what so ever, across from her Carmen sat sipping coffee and completely ignoring her only daughter. They hadn't spoken since Gabriella's harsh words in the car, those harsh words that Gabriella oddly did not regret. When she'd said them she knew that she was protecting her mother from the even harsher words that would have come tumbling out of her mouth, she knew she was protecting her mother from her feelings, but why did it hurt so much? Now she wished she could take the words back, say them in a different way perhaps or maybe even ignore the question all together. But she couldn't and now she was stuck trying to think of a way to make it up to her mother. The answer was simple; she could just talk to her mother and tell her everything but at the same time she couldn't. How did she start? That was the hard part, but what about continuing? Would she be able to continue once she started? Or would it be too hard? Gabriella pushed her cereal around her bowl for the tenth time and sighed. Why did she have to live this life? Why couldn't someone else? Why did she have to say those harsh things and than play that song? Why did these thoughts have to circle through her head over and over again until she got a headache? Why did she have to be numb? Why did she have to feel lost? Why did she have to feel like she was in the dark? Why did she feel helpless? Why, why, why? Gabriella slammed the spoon down and her mother looked up in shock.

"Gabriella, you'd better go if you want to get to school on time" Gabriella looked up shock on her face; her mother had just spoken to her.

Carmen looked back down at the book she was reading; amazed that she had actually spoken to her daughter. It had been a natural reaction, she hadn't thought about what she was doing. She had just done it. Carmen heard Gabriella get up and dump her bowl in the sink before heading upstairs. She looked up and sighed, the words that Gabriella had said in the car hung like a cloud in Carmen's mind. Not to mention the song that seemed to be on repeat every time Carmen managed to clear the words. It hurt her so much to know that Gabriella thought that she didn't know she was there or that she didn't know her. Carmen sighed again and looked back down at the book, wishing she knew what to do. Wishing that Carlos was still here, he always seemed to know exactly what to say to Gabriella. He always managed to get through to her and now Carmen wondered who would be able to do that, without Gabriella pushing them away. She looked back at her book and began to read again.

Gabriella pushed her door open and stood in the doorway, her mind still reeling from her mothers words. She knew that they held no particular significance but still she had spoken to her. Something that Gabriella knew that Carmen had been avoiding doing. Gabriella knew her mother well enough to know that when she came to a decision she would stick by it, no matter how harsh the decision was. Gabriella sighed, something that she seemed to do a lot lately, and picked up her bag that held her assignment and the other catch up homework that she had managed to do after she had recovered from the episode in the car. With a last glance at her room, that was still as neat and tidy as it was the day she had unpacked, she left and walked back downstairs. She paused at the kitchen and wondered whether or not she should say goodbye to her mother. She stood there and than walked out the door without a word, she closed her eyes as she shut the door and once again wished she had said the words in a different manner, but she hadn't and now she had to deal with the consequences of saying them.

Gabriella stared into her locker, unaware of all the shouts around her and all the people walking past. She'd zoned out again, but not into a memory, she'd just zoned out. She was in a place where she didn't have to deal with her life and those haunting questions. It was a place where she didn't have to deal with her feelings, no matter how remote they actually were. The bell rang and she snapped out of it, groaning she shut her locker and headed for her homeroom, walking slowly among the other rushing people. It didn't bother that she was going to be late for homeroom, it would earn her a detention and that would mean a few less minutes in her mothers cold company. Normally Gabriella would have thought getting a detention would have been a sin punishable by death but her life wasn't normal anymore, so it didn't matter if she got one or not. She finally reached room 214 and reached for the handle, knowing Miss Darbus would be on her like a hawk. As soon as the door opened someone ran into Gabriella and they both went flying.

The room was silent as everyone stared at the two people on the floor in a tangle of limbs and backpacks. Even Miss Darbus stared at them in shock; this was not something she had to deal with often.

Gabriella stared up into the electric blue eyes of Troy Bolton and felt herself begin to blush as she released the position they were in. Her back was to the floor and he was on top of her, holding her waist, her arms were holding his shoulders and his face was centimeters from her own, their lips almost touching, Gabriella found that she couldn't tear her eyes away from his and her breath quickened, as did her pulse.

"Mr Bolton get off Miss Montez right this instant!" Miss Darbus shouted; that was when both Troy and Gabriella became aware that the entire class was watching them with interest.

Gabriella removed her arms from Troy's shoulders and he rolled off of her and sat up. Gabriella closed her eyes momentarily and sat up as well. Her waist was still warm from Troy's hands and her breathing was beginning to slow down. She opened her eyes and looked over at Troy who had a small smile playing on his lips. As if he felt his eyes on her, he looked over at her and the smile turned into a full grin. She looked at him questioningly and was stunned to note how cute he looked when he smiled, his blue eyes sparkling, his dirty blonde hair falling into his eyes. Gabriella bit her lip and pushed those thoughts out of her mind.

"You know, that's the second time we've run into each other and ended up on the floor" he said in reply to her look and as Gabriella realized he was right she cracked a grin.

"Except this time you were the one that wasn't paying attention" she informed him as he stood up.

"True" he offered her his hand and Gabriella took it hesitantly.

He helped her up and when she was firmly on her feet, he didn't let go of her hand, like she assumed he would. They had both forgotten that they were being watched curiously by their homeroom. Troy opened his mouth to say something more, when they were interrupted for the second time.

"Mr Bolton, Miss Montez I will see you both in detention" Miss Darbus roared and Gabriella yanked her hand away from Troy's.

Suddenly the silence was broken by sudden protests. The loudest coming from a bushy haired boy that Gabriella remembered seeing Troy with yesterday.

"Miss Darbus, you can't give Troy a detention. We have practice and because Troy is our sta-" Miss Darbus cut him off with a menacing look.

"That is enough Mr Danforth; you can have fifteen minutes as well" she snapped.

"Oh poor Chad, forced to actually work for fifteen minutes" an African-American girl said sarcastically and instantly regretted it when Miss Darbus swooped down on her before Chad could say anything.

"That's fifteen minutes for you too Miss McKessie, will there be anymore comments? Because I will happily put more people on detention, there are plenty of things that I have to get done after school" Miss Darbus yelled and the classroom went dead silent again.

Gabriella stood in shock at what had just erupted. She glanced at Troy who was rubbing the back of his neck embarrassed at the outbursts and that's when Gabriella began to wonder exactly why a simple thing such as him being put on a detention could result in such an outburst. She would definitely have to ask someone about Troy Bolton and why he seemed to get such a reaction from his classmates.

"Mr Bolton, Miss Montez, would you please take your seats!" Miss Darbus yelled turning around to find them still standing.

Gabriella and Troy both jumped and hurried to their respective seats. As soon as she sat down Gabriella sunk so low in her seat, making herself as small as possible. Miss Darbus finally began with the morning announcements and Gabriella rubbed the palm of her hand which was still tingling from when Troy had been holding it. Her eyes drifted and they landed on Troy himself, who was staring straight ahead. For the first time since they had met yesterday Gabriella studied him. She discovered that his face bore planes and curves that she hadn't expected to be there; she noticed how his dirty blonde hair fell into his eyes, she noticed that even though he was being serious he still managed to look cute. Her gaze drifted down and Gabriella could just make out his well defined body, he had to be an athlete of some sort, she decided. She shivered as she remembered that just a few moments earlier he had been on top of her. Gabriella tore her eyes away from Troy and stared at her desk as she realized something else. He had somehow managed to make her forget her predicament; he had managed to pull her thoughts away from the never ending circle of questions that were constantly in her head. What scared her the most, though, was that he had managed to do all that, but at the same time he only knew her name.

Gabriella slammed her locker shut; her mood had changed drastically from this morning. She was now in the worst mood that she could possibly be in and it didn't seem to get through to people that she was tired of being asked the same question over and over again. 'Did Troy Bolton really kiss you?' it seemed to her that gossip spread quicker around this school than a wildfire tore through the bush. Gabriella had heard more than ten revised versions of what had happened that morning, the best one being that she and Troy had walked into the room in the middle of a make out session and that she had tripped and that's how they had ended up on the floor. On the other hand Gabriella had found out some things about Troy Bolton, such as he had the entire school wired, he was the starting center, and captain, for the school Basketball team who were going to the championships in a few weeks and that every girl that went to the school had a crush on him. Gabriella let out a sigh as she headed to English, it was her second last period for the day and it was the one that she had to present an assignment in. It also happened to be one of the classes that she shared with Troy.

She walked into the room and ignored that looks that she was getting from the girls, she determinedly avoided looking at Troy and sat down at the back of the room. It was a safe choice, after all if they wanted to look at her they would need to turn around in their seats and besides Troy was sitting up the front, she would have to worry about him watching her.

"Alright, now that we're all here, Sharpay, it's time we started on the assignments and seeing as I'm such a gentleman the ladies may go first" Mr Hall announced.

The announcement was met with a chorus of groans and he just smiled.

"Sharpay, you can go first" he called and a blonde girl got up the front and slipped a CD into the player.

Gabriella tuned out and thought about the assignment, it had been an easy one. All they had had to do was find a song that seemed to talk about their entire life and explain why they had chosen it. This meant that they had to listen to the lyrics; Gabriella hadn't needed to think about what song she had to choose or why it was a simple choice and the assignment had taken her all of ten minutes to complete. She was snapped out of her thinking when the teacher called her name.

Sighing she stood up and took her CD with her, she opened the player and set it in. Ignoring how the other students perked up, wondering what was about to come blaring from the player.

Do you ever feel like breaking down?

Do you ever feel out of place?

Like somehow you just don't belong

And no-one understands you

Do you ever want to run away?

Do you look yourself in you room?

With the radio on turned up so loud

That no-one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

No one ever lied straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like, what it's like

The class sat in shock as the song finished, Gabriella knew that they had been expecting something totally different from her. She looked at the ground and than looked back up and cast her gaze around the room. Her gaze landed on Troy Bolton and she stood there looking into his blue eyes as the teacher cleared his throat.

"Miss Montez, would you be able to tell us why you choose that song?" Mr Hall asked and Gabriella tore her gaze away from Troy's and looked at him.

"Because you don't know what its like" she replied her voice barely audible.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You don't know what it's like to be kicked when you're down; you don't know what its like to feel completely and utterly lost, to be on the edge of breaking down and living with the knowledge that there's going to be no-one their to save you and you definitely don't know what its like to be hurt" Gabriella said and the bell rang.

Gabriella grabbed her CD and than went back down to her desk and picked up her bag and her books. She walked out of the room without a word to anyone, knowing that none of them knew exactly what to think of her answer. As she walked down the hall she heard her name being called.

"Gabriella, wait" she stopped because she recognized that voice, it belonged to Troy.

"What?" she asked when he was close enough to hear her.

"Why that song?" he replied stopping in front of her and looking down.

"I told the class, you don't know what its like" Gabriella said and than without another word she turned on her heel and walked away, leaving a very intrigued and slightly confused Troy Bolton standing in the middle of the hallway.

As Gabriella walked she knew that he would seek her out again for a straight answer and she wondered. Did she have a straight answer for everything that was happening? Did she know the reason why she was so lost? Was she sure she was in the dark? Gabriella sighed because she knew the answer to all those questions, but she refused to acknowledge them.

A/N: Finished! This chapter was so hard to start because I was already planning the next one, apart from that I hope you all liked it! And just in case you didn't know the song was 'Welcome to my Life' by Simple Plan.