Chapter 12: The Black Dog
Viktoria made her way down muggle London. It was October fifteen, not a very happy occasion for the past several years. It seemed that once it was one of the happiest days of the year, the one day she used to look forward to every year, but now it seemed to be the loneliest and saddest day of the year. It always reminded her of Viktor, as it was their birth day, and as Severus was back at Hogwarts teaching she was completely alone.
Not that it would have been any better to have him around. He'd written to her a letter at the beginning of the previous school year, telling her that Remus would be teaching at Hogwarts, something that Viktoria cared nothing for, she still refused to forgive Remus for not attending her wedding. She hadn't thought about the fact that her brother would spill the beans about her relationship with Sirius, which turned their already struggling marriage even more sour.
They're marriage was already suffering because he was gone all year to be teaching, the distance was hurting them, but after that blow Viktoria had begun to fear that they would not last together much longer. She was getting tired of the constant arguing and the fact that Severus would just leave for days at a time after a particularly nasty argument. Viktoria was slowly getting very tired of it all. It didn't help that she was still hurting from the fact that she had lost her first child. Severus wanted a child, and she wanted to give him one, but she was too scared of what would happen.
Viktoria closed her eyes tight as she walked. When she and Severus had first found out that they were going to have a baby, they were so very happy. It was going to be a boy and they were going to name him Marius, but she lost him. Apparently her body was not able to provide him with what he needed.
Viktoria looked up at the sound of a dog whimpering. She looked down at the black dog that was limping over to her. Viktoria furrowed her brow as she crouched down to grab the little guy. She stared at its big black eyes which were shining with pain, he looked so adorable. The dog was thin and scruffy, but was very adorable despite it all.
Viktoria furrowed her brow as she looked at it, a very familiar looking dog it was. Viktoria looked around as she grabbed the dog and apparated it home. 'All right Sirius, I know it's you,' the letters glowed green as she stared down at it. The dog merely tilted its head in that cute way dogs do. 'Oh don't look at me like that. I know it's you.'
The dog rolled it's eyes as its shape shifted into that of a rather tall, thin man that looked like he'd gone through hell and was trying to recover from it. She guessed twelve years in Azkaban really was a lifetime. "All right, why are you not afraid of me or looking at me like I am a murderer?" he asked as he stared down at her. "Have you talked to Remus?"
'I haven't talked to Remus in, about twelve or thirteen years,' the letters glowed green as she turned away from him and sat down, like it was a perfectly natural and safe thing to be speaking to a man who had escaped from prison and was the most wanted man in the entire wizarding world. He stared at her, wondering why it was then that she wasn't afraid or calling the local authorities on him.
"Then why are you sitting there staring at me like I'm not a threat to your life?" he asked as he stared down at her. She stared at him with very sad eyes. He noted that a lot had changed about her. She was as beautiful as ever and she still seemed young, but her eyes seemed to be filled with grief and despair, the likes of which he'd never seen written there. Sure he had always seen that sad look in her eyes, but this was ten times worse then ever before.
'You're not going to hurt me. I know you Sirius. I know you would die before letting anything happen to James or Lily. I don't know what exactly happened, but I know that you're innocent, which is why you can stay here as long as you want,' the letters glowed before him and he merely nodded as he stared down at her.
"Really? I mean I'd hate to impose, but spending any longer on the streets..."
'Of course I'm serious. You can stay as long as you wish. So what happened at Hogwarts? I've heard a good deal about the fact that you were there. But would care to elaborate and tell me the whole story?' the words glowed in front of him as she smiled that sad smile of hers.
Sirius merely sat down as he stared down at her and sat down next to her. He told her about his year, about his capture, his escape and the fact that he was close to Harry, their godson. Viktoria smiled as she heard about what he had to say. After what happened to Lily and James and Sirius, she'd wanted to take Harry. She wanted to raise him, but Dumbledore said that he should be brought up by actual relatives and away from the wizarding world. He also pointed out the fact that Severus would have hated to raise Harry, therefore she merely watched over him as best she could from a safe distance.
"I wish that I could take him away from his awful aunt and uncle, but ..." he trailed off as it was obvious why he couldn't.
'Yes I know. I watched over him as best I could, from a safe distance. But I had to stop when he was about eight or nine,' she said as she looked over at Sirius. He nodded. He understood why Dumbledore had wanted Harry to be raised by his aunt and uncle.
"So what has been happening in your life? Why haven't you seen or talked to Remus in such a long time?" he asked as he stared at her with a furrowed brow. Her and her brothers had always been as thick as thieves. He didn't understand how or why she hadn't seen Remus in such a long time. Viktoria sighed.
'As you may have found out when Viktor died Severus and I were back together,' the letters glowed before him and he nodded.
"Remus wasn't very happy about that and as a matter of fact neither was I. I was worried about you, after what happened the last time," he said as he stared at his good friend. She smiled bitterly as she looked at him.
'Well Severus and I got married, after the war with Voldemort was over and he disappeared,' Sirius grimaced as this and motioned for her to go on. 'I asked Remus to come to the wedding, but he absolutely refused and I've never wanted to talk to him since. I've never forgiven him for it. And as he was working with Severus, he let it slip that you and I were together once upon a time and our marriage problems only increased and it's gotten to the point were I don't think I can take it anymore.'
"What problems are you having?" Sirius asked as he stared at her. She then went on to explain all of their problems, including the miscarriage in which she burst into tears. "Please don't cry Viktoria, everything is all right," he said as he reached out and brought her to his chest.
---
"You wanted to see me?" Sirius asked as he walked up to Viktoria, it was nearly the end of the school year and Severus would soon be returning home. Sirius hated to have to leave Harry alone as his last task was a mere day away, but Viktoria said it was urgent for her to see him. That she had very big news to tell him.
He'd stayed at her house for quite sometime, then left, then came and then left. Viktoria didn't mind that he just came and went and that he was gone for months at a time. He was just a good friend, but they did do something the last time which was probably not the best thing for them to do, not that either one of them regretted it.
'I'm pregnant,' the green letters glowed in front of him as he stared at her in complete and utter shock. Of course he was not stupid enough to ask the question if it was his, he already knew it was. Viktoria had not seen Severus in nearly a year and she certainly had not slept with him in much longer then that. Therefore he knew that it could be no one elses, but he just simply couldn't understand how that happened.
"Are you planning to keep the baby?" he asked as he stared at her. She looked down at her feet as Sirius held his breath, he didn't want what might be his only child to be thrown away.
'Or course I am,' she simply said as she touched her flat stomach. 'I'm less then a month along, but it's a little life inside me and I could never destroy his only chance at living. But I am worried Sirius,' she said as she looked up into his eyes, her eyes were sparkling with unshed tears.
"About what Severus will say?"
'NO! That I might lose him, that my body might not be able to sustain the little life growing inside of me,' she said as she looked up into his eyes.
"What are you planning to say to Severus?" he asked as he stared at her.
'The truth, what else can I say?' she asked as she looked at him. He placed his arms around her and held her tight, despite the hurtle that this was going to cause he couldn't keep the joy he was feeling away. He was going to have a baby!
"OH, don't worry about anything Viktoria, everything will be fine!" he said as he stared at her.
---
Viktoria sat frozen, her face very pale as Severus finally fell silent about the return of the Dark Lord and the fact that he had to go back into his service. He'd just gotten home from Hogwarts, the school year had finally ended and he'd just told her about everything. "I think that it would simply be for the best if we separated. Our marriage isn't working and the added stress of having to constantly return to the Dark Lord isn't going to help. I have this place in Spinners End where I can stay," he said as he stared at her.
"You're leaving me?" she asked as she turned her gaze, her voice was dead and hollow, devoid of all emotion. It wasn't like she wasn't expecting something like this.
"Yes and no. I will continue to support you, I will visit you, but this is for the best," he said as he stared down at her. She took in a deep breath, after everything that he'd told her, she wasn't sure if she could handle this, especially not in the condition she was in. The first few months of pregnancy were critical, if she were upset, it was very harmful to the baby, which she still had to tell him about. "I'm not asking you for a divorce. I still love you, but as things are and everything that is going on and as we know what's to come, I don't want to be around you. It's more for your safety than anything."
"You don't have to explain Severus. I understand why you're leaving," she said as she looked at him. She looked down at her hand and stared at the wedding ring on her finger. Despite the fact that she loved Sirius and cheated on Severus, despite the fact that they were having so many problems, he was still the love of her life and nothing would ever change that. Therefore, it did hurt that he was leaving. "But before you go, there is something that I have to tell you and I understand if you hate me and never want to see me again."
"What is it?" he asked with a furrowed brow.
"I'm pregnant," she said simply as she looked into his eyes. His eyes clouded over with anger as he stared at her.
"By who? When? How could you do this to me?" he said as he stood up and turned his back to her. Viktoria stood up.
"I didn't do it to hurt you, but I've gotten so tired about the way that you refuse to let my past go. Like in the four years that you were a Death Eater you had not slept with Bellatrix!" Severus whirled around and stared at her with a furrowed brow. "What did you think that I didn't know? Of course I knew, but I never gave you a hard time about it, did I? And she was married, so don't act like I was the only one to commit adultery."
"But there is a very big difference in what I did and what you have done," he said as he stared down at her and she looked up into his eyes. "Have you come to hate me that much that you would betray me this way?" he asked as he stared down at her. She shook her head.
"I don't hate you. I love you just the same as I always have, but you haven't exactly been acting like you love me. You've left me alone for years, not just recently and I needed someone," she said a she looked up into his eyes. "I'm not blaming you, but I needed someone and it wasn't expected."
"Whose is it?" He asked as he stared down at her.
"Sirius," she said simply which sent him into a rage. He turned away and stared to pace furiously.
"What! Out of all people in the world it had to be that man? You better not be planning to keep it," she said as he turned around and looked down at her, coming dangerously close to him. She stared up at him with a furrowed brow.
"It's a child Severus, of course I'm keeping the baby. It's not the baby's fault that our marriage has been falling apart and it's not the baby's fault that I had a moment of weakness. Besides, you're leaving me as it is, what do you care if I keep the baby or not?" she asked as she looked up into his eyes. She wasn't afraid of him, she never was. "Just leave Severus, if you're going to go."
Severus stared at her as she turned away from him and walked away. She was hiding the tears that were building up in her eyes, something she'd taken to doing ever since he found out of her past relationship with Sirius. He watched her as she started walking away and looked down at the wedding band around his finger. "Will you still love me in the morning?" he asked softly as he looked up. She stopped walking.
"I should be the one asking you that. You know my answer and it will never change. You have always been and will always be the greatest love of my life," she said without looking at him, he could hear the tears in her voice. He walked over to her and turned her around gently. He wiped the tears that had spilled from her beautiful eyes and down her cheek.
"I don't wish to leave you alone in this condition, but you and I both know that it is for the best that I leave. If I stay I will stress you and the child will be at risk. Besides I need time to deal with this, but I will try to take care of you," he said as he stared down into her eyes.
TBC…