Gibraltar Barracks Room (later in the night)

Dearka couldn't work out what had awoken him. For the space of three breaths he lay there in bed looking at the room bathed in moonlight. He hadn't bothered to pull the curtains when they returned from the mess-hall. Yzak had hit a wall of exhaustion once he finally ate, and had got wobbly on his legs, just walking back. When they reached their room, Dearka had stripped him down to his underwear and rolled him into bed, with only token protests from the other boy. In truth, Dearka had not been that much better himself. He'd just killed the lights, undressed, and crawled into his own bed. The time on the com-unit now read 3 a.m.

So what woke me?

Suddenly a moan and muttered words came from Yzak's side of the room. Dearka lay perfectly still, and began to grin to himself. Was the normally super-inhibited Yzak Joule jerking off? What a golden opportunity for revenge for those embarrassing times in Dearka's past when Yzak had caught him at the same pastime and made his life a misery.

In the next moment the smile was wiped away as a distinct sob emerged from the huddle on Yzak's bed.

What the fuck is going on? "Hey, Yzak. Are you OK?"

Silence.

"Yzak!"

Still nothing, though maybe there was some stirring of the bedclothes.

Dearka got out of bed and slipped over to Yzak's. The moonlight unfortunately didn't quite penetrate the shadow around Yzak's bed. Dearka reached down and shook a thin muscular shoulder. It was trembling.

"Yzak, Yzak, what's the matter? Are you OK?"

Maybe it was some sort of delayed reaction. Yzak had not really had much rest even at the hospital…

Suddenly Yzak uncoiled from the bedclothes and sat bolt upright.

"Dearka? What the hell do you want?"

"You were making noises. I thought you might be sick."

"What do you mean, 'noises'?"

"Like - distressed sort of noises. Yzak, what's going on?"

Yzak wearily finger-combed his tangled hair back from his face. "Nothing's going on. You made a mistake, is all. I'm fine."

Something urged Dearka not to let this go. He sat down on the side of Yzak's bed.

"Hey, get off my bed you great lummox!"

"No, I'm not going anywhere, till I find out what's up with you."

There was a long uncomfortable silence. Then from Yzak, as if teeth were being pulled: "A dream."

"What dream?"

Dearka was surprised at Yzak's response to his question. It had none of the sarcasm or self-protective hostility he normally would have got from Yzak in such circumstances:

"I was re-living the descent, only this time I couldn't get to you. We were both falling but you seemed to be much faster than me. I could see Buster way below, like a glowing ember. Then the ember went out. And I knew you were dead. And I felt…..bad."

"Is that why you were crying?"

"Was I crying?" Yzak sounded genuinely bewildered. Dearka reached into the shadow and stroked a couple of fingers across the curve of Yzak's cheek. Yzak flinched. Dearka turned his hand and showed the other the moisture, in the gleam of the moonlight.

"Yeah, you've been crying, all right."

Yzak just shook his head in bewilderment." I don't remember." His voice sounded dead.

Acting on instinct, Dearka pulled him into hug. He felt Yzak stiffen in his arms. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"Trying to make you feel better."

The simple reply seemed to stun Yzak for a moment; then he found his voice. "Let me go, you moron. I am not some little kid that needs comforting."

Dearka laughed and actually tightened his arms a bit.

"Hell, Yzak. You don't have to pretend with me. I'm the guy whose hand you had to hold all night in the hospital, remember? Sometimes, you just have to have somebody to hang on to."

For a moment Dearka thought Yzak would pull out of his arms, but suddenly the tension went out of him. Dearka felt Yzak's arms go round him and hug him in return. They sat in there in silence for what seemed a long time. Dearka began to feel the strain of sitting in the slightly twisted position.

"Uh, Yzak. I have to move."

Yzak, who must also have been quite uncomfortable, obviously didn't care. He wordlessly shook his head and burrowed deeper against Dearka.

"Look, I'll just move up the bed a bit, so I lie straight with something behind me, OK?"

Dearka swung his legs on to the bed and pushed himself up it, gouging one of Yzak's pillows behind him as he went, till it was sandwiched between his back and the wall. Yzak shuffled up with him to maintain their relative positions. He showed no signs of wanting to move away. With a little wriggling, Dearka made himself comfortable, and Yzak nestled back into place. Dearka's arms firmed a little around the boy's back and shoulders. That's right, don't move. You are welcome to stay right where you are. I want you here with me.

Dearka began to move a heavy lazy hand in circles on Yzak's back. For a moment Yzak tensed, and then with a little sigh, relaxed even more deeply into Dearka's embrace. They lay like that for a long time. The silence was the most comforting thing Dearka had experienced since they fell to Earth. For the first time he felt as if his mind was clear, except all he wanted to think about was Yzak, and how good it felt just to be here with him like this.

What is going on here?

It was almost as if Yzak could read his mind, or maybe he was puzzling over the same question. "Dearka, do you think we're cracking up?"

Dearka drew a deep breath while he thought about the question. "Remember those lectures we had back in the ZAFT Academy about combat stress? It can manifest itself in lots of different ways. I guess you could argue we're prime candidates for it at the moment. Consider how we're fixed: we're isolated from our unit and commander, dependent on each other in an alien environment, facing a dangerous enemy…Yeah, guess you could make a case for us cracking up, Yzak."

"You seem to remember a lot from those lectures. You always had your eyes closed during them – I thought you were asleep for most of the time." Although still slightly strained, Yzak's voice sounded a lot more normal now.

"Yeah, well, I had an ulterior motive for paying attention." Dearka felt embarrassed now to admit why.

"Which was?"

"Um. I had this half-baked notion that it might prove useful to get girls. You know, play the sympathy card about the poor combat-stressed pilot needing a little feminine comfort…"

Dearka both felt and heard the shaky laughter that came from Yzak. "You are a sick bastard, Elsman. You know that don't you?"

He had a sudden flashback to a certain scene in the hospital and couldn't hold back his own laugh. "Well, what about you and the quartermaster's clerk?"

He had woken up at the hospital to the sound of Yzak on the phone. He could only hear Yzak's end of the conversation, but it was easy enough to fill in the other side of the dialogue.

"Yes, I said, Joule. J-O-U-L-E. Same spelling as Ezalia Joule, the Supreme Council Member. Yes, that's right."

"I've given you our names and numbers. Get the details of our sizes out of the damn personnel database. And get those uniforms over here within an hour or you will live to regret it, soldier!"

"Well if you're just there for emergencies you'd better get ready for one. I am an emergency as far as you're concerned! If I have to go over there with my arse hanging out of this hospital gown, I will. And it will be the last thing you will ever see, because I will gouge your fucking eyeballs out and force them down your damn throat!"

"No, I'm sure violence will not be necessary. Good. Don't forget the boots, too. Thank you so much."

Yzak disconnected. "Arsehole."

Yzak dug his chin sharply into Dearka's chest by way of protest. "There was nothing underhand in my dealings with that guy!"

"Yeah, but I doubt he'd testify in your favour at a sanity hearing. Especially when you greeted him at the door when he delivered the stuff, with that sheet wrapped round you like a toga. It was probably the bandaged head that really put the wind up him, though. I bet he thought you'd hit your head and were unstable. He was sure glad to dump the clothes and go." Dearka chuckled at the memory of the soldier's strained face, gazing at the strangely draped Joule boy.

"I should have told the doctor how you got our uniforms. Poor bastard looked as if he could use a good laugh."

"I don't like doctors, and I certainly don't want to socialise with one. The less they know about you, the better."

"Aw, c'mon, Yzak. He wasn't such a bad sort. Actually, I think he felt sorry for us."

"Sorry for us? Why the hell would anybody be sorry for us?"

"Beats me, Yzak. The world is full of strange people"

Yzak wriggled. "I have to get up and piss."

Dearka relaxed his arms. "Be my guest."

Yzak got up out of the bed and stood beside it looking down at Dearka. "I'm all right now. You can go back to your own bed."

"Do you want me to?"

Yzak hesitated, then shrugged. "Don't care. Up to you."

"Well, I'll stay then. I'm kind of comfortable here. If you don't want to join me, you can always use my bed instead."

Yzak didn't say another word, just left for the bathroom. Dearka lay propped where he was for a moment, then slid a little more comfortably down into the bed. Wonder if Yzak will call my bluff?

He had his answer a little later when Yzak slipped back into bed. "Move your big lummox body."

"Ouch! There was no reason to use your elbow, Joule. You just have to say you want more space."

"Shut up and go to sleep. And Dearka?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"G'night, Yzak."