A Proper Goodbye
…
The world was ending.
Aria stood at the entrance of base the following morning. In the main hanger stood Jolt, Sideswipe, Bumblebee, Ratchet, Skids, Mudflap, and of course, Ironhide.
Optimus transformed behind her, the unexpected sound made her flinch, the first movement she made since taking the last step down from the aforementioned Peterbilt.
She let out a long exhale. It was happening. She needed to walk forward, but struggled to put one foot ahead of the other. Maybe if she turned and ran, they wouldn't make her do it.
They wouldn't make her say goodbye.
Optimus stepped forward, going ahead to join the other Autobots. He easily covered the distance in only a few steps. As much as she wanted to follow, she couldn't. Not that it really mattered, either way, she'd never see them again.
How long would it take them to forget her?
"Aria?" a voice came from her left.
She looked up and fixed her glasses that had fallen down her nose. Lennox approached her, a look of concern overtaking his features. Did she look as bad as she felt? Probably.
"Hey, Colonel Lennox," she said with much less enthusiasm than she intended.
He put a hand on her back and pushed her forward. "Come on, kid."
The gentle pressure of his hand on her back forced her forward. Memories of her first visit flooded her mind. How nervous she was seeing them for the first time since the ship. Yet they treated her with nothing but kindness. Her eyes found Ironhide. Well, relatively speaking.
It went to show how first impressions weren't everything.
At least in the end, they were.
The Autobots waited in silence, their eyes glancing between each other and then back to her. All of them except for Ironhide who stood behind the others, staring off somewhere.
Was something wrong? Shouldn't he look sad too?
Lennox didn't stop in front of the robots, instead he led her up the steps of the large bridge apparatus set up behind the towering robots. They made their way to the center of it, and were now chest level with the Autobots.
"Alright boys," Lennox began, "this is the last time any of you will be able to make contact with Aria, and vice versa. I am aware that some of you have become close friends with her and that you visit her on your days off." He looked pointedly in Ironhide's direction. "This, however, is becoming a danger to not only Aria, but us as well. The Decepticons have been unusually quiet lately, which means they're probably up to something and we don't know what that is yet. What we do know is that they will exploit any weakness, no matter how petty. And frankly, I don't want to know what would happen if they found out about Aria."
As hard as it was to hear, he was right. From what she'd heard of the Decepticons, they were conniving. But still!
Bee and Jolt nodded solemnly in agreement. Skids and Mudflap slouched slightly more than usual. Optimus, Ratchet and Sideswipe wore grim looks on their metallic faces. Ironhide, however, still appeared largely indifferent.
The first to approach her was Bumblebee. The expressive Autobot looked at the floor sadly then looked up at her with the most dejected look she'd ever seen. He brought a hand up and held out his finger in front of her. She grasped it, accepting the handshake.
"So long, partner," came Woody's voice from his radio.
She didn't get to know him very well, but she could see why Sam was so fond of him, he was young and playful and full of vibrant energy.
"Bye Bee," her voice came out a whisper. There was a lump in her throat.
Ratchet came next. She watched his blue optic eyes focus in on her.
"We will all miss you, Aria. We are grateful of your hospitality and kindness."
He came over a few times, talking astronomy and asking sometimes uncomfortable human anatomy questions. He attempted to scan her horses at one point, to no avail.
"I'll miss you guys too. Thank you for coming to visit, it meant a lot to me."
Next up was Skidz and Mudflap. They resembled children that didn't want to say goodbye to their friend. They walked so close together that they bumped into each other.
"Thanks for hangin' out wit us man."
"Yeah, you pretty alright for a squishy."
The twins were an interesting pair that weren't allowed off the base without supervision, and even that was a recent development. She could tell how unimpressed Sideswipe was the first time he brought them along. They bickered and fought, almost taking a few trees out in the process. Once they re-enacted their fight in Egypt using an unwilling Sideswipe as Devastator. Unfortunately, their act ended with Sideswipe throwing Skids at Mudflap, both of them landing in a pile.
Aria smiled at the memory. "I'll miss you two."
Skidz nudged her shoulder then they turned to leave reveling Jolt next.
The blue robot regarded her with a solemn expression. "It was nice to have met you, Aria."
When Jolt came to visit they usually ended up going on a walk around the property. Some days he would hardly talk at all and some days he would politely talk and ask whatever burning questions he previously compiled for her.
"I'll miss our walks," she replied.
Sideswipe approached next. His silver body gleaming bright under the lights of the hanger.
"I'm going to miss your pretty face, little lady," he half heartedly smirked.
Unlike the other Autobots, Sideswipe seemed to favor his alternate mode. When he came alone, they ended up going for scenic drives through the city. Despite Aria sitting in the driver seat, he felt no remorse revving at girls as the crossed the street. One lady sent her a very suggestive look and Sideswipe nearly transformed because he was laughing so hard. Other than that, he liked to go through drive throughs and order things for Aria through his speakers. She was sure he got a rise out of embarrassing her as much as possible.
"I'll miss yours too, handsome guy," she joked with a small smile of her own.
The Prime now stood in front of her. Even from here he towered over her.
"We are forever indebted to you, Ms. Normandy. You have provided us with friendship and a place rest on the days we need it most. You will not be forgotten."
Optimus' words washed over her in a wave of relief. He had been so harsh before. It was probably to distance himself from her mentally in order to make this process a clean break. She was caught off guard. No room to argue, no time to persuade.
As much as it hurt, she couldn't deny his logic. He was the leader. He made the tough decisions. Many tougher decisions than this. He was kind and compassionate, perhaps the most compassionate being she would ever meet. He had so many things to worry about, and yet he came to her home personally to tell her. He allowed her to come say goodbye to everyone. And here he was saying goodbye to her face to face.
"Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your lives. I'll never forget you either."
Optimus nodded at her and turned away. Only Ironhide was left.
Aria's heart beat quickened as the final Autobot approached. He stopped further away from the platform she stood on than the rest. Why was he acting like this?
"Goodbye Aria, try not to do anything foolish," he chided.
Before Aria could formulate her response, he turned away and joined the others.
Aria blinked. She turned to Lennox who matched her look of disbelief with his own. That was cold, even for Ironhide.
"Try not to take it personally." He put a hand on her shoulder.
Aria bit her lip and looked away. That was as personal as it got. If Optimus was trying to make this a clean break, then Ironhide was blowing up the entire tree.
"I think I should go now," she whispered, not trusting her voice.
Aria followed Lennox back down the steps and back towards the entrance of the hanger. The Autobots followed behind. Just outside was a black SUV with a soldier standing beside it.
As they approached it, the sound of large footfalls stopped behind them. When Aria turned around, all the Autobots stood behind a yellow line just before the exit of the base. This was as far as they could go in their robot forms.
Her eyes swept over their faces, landing on Ironhide's. Even now, he didn't look at her. The soldier opened the back door of the SUV. She slowly climbed in.
"See ya, kid. Stay out of trouble," Lennox put his hand on her shoulder, giving her a meaningful look.
"Bye Colonel Lennox," the lump in her throat grew larger.
He rolled his eyes playfully, "Just call me Will."
Aria smiled at his attempt to lighten the mood. "Bye Will, thanks for everything."
"Anytime, kid."
Lennox backed away from the open door. Aria looked at the Cybertonians for the last time.
"Bye guys," she said weakly and waved.
All but one waved back.
She stole one last glance at Ironhide. As the door closed, for the briefest moment, her eyes finally met his.
She sobbed the entire way home.
…
She called in sick as soon as she got home. There was no way in hell she could handle being around anyone today. She felt exhausted and wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed and die. It felt like someone carved out every emotion in her body leaving only sadness behind.
Aria leaned heavily on the railing as she ascended the stairs up to her room. Wheelie's door was half open revealing Sirius sleeping on the floor. She peeked in and saw the little robot on his bed with his old laptop.
He looked over at her. "I'm guessin' they didn't change their minds?"
Aria shook her head.
"They'll come around."
Aria turned to leave. "Doubt it."
…
Aria awoke to a knock on her door. Bright moonlight filtered through her sheer curtains. The clock beside her read 2:24am. She looked back over as her door creaked open. Wheelie poked his head in.
A sultry voice still sung from her speaker on her dresser. She didn't remember falling asleep.
Down on the West Coast they got a sayin'
'If you're not drinkin' then you're not playin'
She sat up slightly acknowledging Wheelie's presence. "What's up?" she asked rubbing her eyes. They were still sore from crying.
But you've got the music, you've got the music in you, don't you?
"You have a visitor," he replied quietly and pointed across her room to the balcony doors.
Down on the West Coast I get this feeling
Like it all could happen that's why I'm leaving
She looked where he was pointing then back at him. Visitor? No one knocked and her room was on the second floor. Wheelie simply glanced back towards her balcony one more time then disappeared behind the door as he shut it.
You for the moment, you for the moment, Boy Blue, yeah, you
Aria slowly got out of bed and grabbed a cardigan to put over her silk nightgown. She walked over to the drawn curtains and pulled them back from the French doors. She opened them and wandered out in disbelief. The white light was not from the moon.
Your flyin' high at the show, I'm feeling hot to the touch
You say you'll miss me the most, I say I'll miss you so much
There, standing before her, was Ironhide.
But something keeps me really quiet, I'm alive, I'm a lush
Your love, your love, our love
He looked at her in silence. The lights on his chest illuminated the area in a dim white light. His good eye glowed brighter than his injured one. They looked at each other. The only noise was the slow song flowing from the room behind her.
"You look awful," he finally spoke.
Was this real?
Was Ironhide actually here right after he was told that he could never see her again? He was so cold to her earlier, and now he was here in the middle of the night. No, this couldn't be real.
"Am I dreaming?"
Ironhide smirked, "Would you like me to pinch you?"
"No," she said airily, "You'd probably kill me."
"You will have to take my word for it then"
Aria meant to laugh, but loud sob escaped her throat in its place. Ironhide stayed quiet while she did her best to compose herself and wipe the tears that refused to stop falling down her face.
"Are you allowed to be here?" she finally asked.
"No."
Down on the West Coast, they got their icons
Their silver starlets, their Queens of Saigons
She stepped forward and rested her arms on the metal railing. It was cold. "But you came anyway?"
He took a step closer as well, placing a hand on the railing beside her, "To say a proper goodbye." His voice was gentle.
And you've got the music, you've got the music in you, don't you?
Aria looked into his blue eyes. He was so close to her, if she reached out she could touch his hand if she wanted. So close she could feel the heat radiating from his body.
She stood there taking in all the features of his metal face. Every piece of metal that connected to form shapes that mirrored human features, every intricate symbol, every scratch that marred the surface.
"I'm sorry it had to be this way, Aria."
It was then she saw an expression that she had never seen on him before. Sadness. So they were friends, after all.
"Me too." More tears fell. She tilted her chin up, blinking her eyes.
Was it possible for him to miss her as much as she would miss him?
Slowly, he let go of the railing beside her. He brought a finger up to her face, and with a touch more gentle than she thought him capable of, he brushed a tear from her cheek. He stayed like that for a moment before recoiling his hand and putting it back at his side.
You push it hard, I pull away, I'm feeling hotter than fire
I guess that no one ever really made me feel that much higher
"Goodbye, Aria. Be safe."
She swallowed. "You too."
Te deseo, cariño, boy, it's you I desire
"Don't do anything dangerous," he crossed his arms.
"All right."
"Don't talk to strangers."
She nodded.
"Train every day."
"I will."
I can see my baby swingin'
His Parliament's on fire and his hands are up
"Always keep your guard up."
"Of course."
"If you see a Decepticon-."
"Ironhide," she interrupted.
He recoiled. "What?"
When did he get so close?
"You're rambling," she gave him a gentle smile.
On the balcony and I'm singing
Ooh, baby, ooh, baby, I'm in love
His expression softened, "Maybe I am, but you are the one prone to running toward danger instead of away from it."
"I do not," she mocked offense.
He leaned in. "Tell me again how you ended up in Egypt?"
"Curiosity." She matched him.
"Don't you humans have a saying for that?" the Autobot gave a lopsided grin.
Aria returned his smile with her own. "We do."
I can see my sweet boy swayin'
He's crazy y Cubano como yo, my love
Once again, he reached towards her, but this time put his hand over the railing beside her, palm up. Aria looked from his hand to his face. He nodded at her.
She approached his hand and hoisted herself up. She sat on his palm and held on to his thumb, her legs dangling.
Her grip tightened significantly as he raised his hand back up and held her in front of him. He sat down heavily behind her house he rested his arm on a bent leg, keeping her close to his chest. He was very warm. At least she could trust that he wouldn't drop her.
"Have you learned any new poems?" he asked.
"No, I didn't get a chance."
On the balcony and I'm saying
Move baby, move baby, I'm in love
"Surely you remember at least one?"
I'm in love
She shook her head. No, but she could do one better.
"There once was a blackbird
Who met a dove,
They sat for a time
Looking above
Words unspoken."
I'm in love
…