Chapter 54

Even before Inuyasha had drawn his last breath, the thread of her hope was being gnawed. It snapped when his heart stopped. Time itself stopped. Words stopped in her throat and thoughts stopped in her mind. The blank, solid red her eyes had become slowly melted back to a teary brown as they rested on the lifeless corpse.

Her lips quivered, her knees slowly buckling until she knelt in the ocean of his blood she had drawn from him. She blinked, refusing to believe it, but the realization was already starting to sink in. It felt as though there was an over inflated balloon with a slow leak pressing against the inside of her ribs. It wasn't long until it popped, and her eyes shot wide.

"Inuyashaaaa!" She screamed out his name, long and hard. A second later, the tears had started to flow again, her shoulders slumping as she ripped her eyes away from the waterfall of blood that begun to run down the length of the tree from behind the lifeless hanyou. Her hair cascaded in front of her face, hiding her features, twisted in miserable shock and horror of what she had watched herself do.

His words rang endlessly in her ears, his deathly moan reaching out to her again and again. She could feel his pain, how the arrow stabbed straight through his heart, she could feel something piercing into her own. It hadn't been an arrow to put him back under a sleeping spell. She could that, how the blood trailed down from his unnaturally pale lips.

He hung there, silent, eerily unmoving, those last three words seeming to run off his dead lips again and again. He was dead. Kagome had killed him.

'What have I done...What have I done?'

"N-No...No..." The miko murmured, dropping the empty bow on the spot, wrapping her arms around her, her tears stinging her skin. He was gone. He would no longer be there to hold her when she cried, call her a fool when she was one, protect her in the midst of battle, smile and kiss her lips when she needed it the most.

And she remember those words so clearly, the ones she had dreamed to hear for years on end. His last words as a last attempt to let her know that he wasn't mad about what she had done to him. He didn't blame her, he didn't hate her. He loved her. And she loved him back.

"I love you...I LOVE YOU!" Her screams echoed through the darkness, frightening birds from their nests in the trees. They flapped their wings, sending crushing waves of pressured air onto Kagome's back, as if the inu hanyou's blood on her hands was not enough.

He couldn't hear her screams. He could never know, now, that she loved him with the undying passion she never showed. The worst part, the thing that crushed harder on her, was the pain expression on his face. He hadn't died with a smile, hadn't been happy in the last moments of his life, hadn't taken his last breath grateful that there was at least one more left. He had died, waiting for her reply.

It wasn't enough to simply cry or scream, her hands raised to twist in her hair, ripping at the beautiful raven strands, slick with blood. His blood and her blood. She felt like she was dying, like she would die. And even as she looked up once more at the lifeless shell Inuyasha had left behind, it hadn't yet hit her that she would never see him alive again.

A harsh moan tore from her lips as she hunched over, pulling at her hair as if to punish herself. She hated herself. She wanted to die by his side, if die at all, just so she wouldn't have to stay behind and miss him, nor him miss her. Now they would be separated. He didn't belong where she was supposed to go. Although, how could the miko make it to Heaven now? She would be rejected, the blood of her first love on her hands.

"I...never meant to...I..." Sobs broke through her sentence, until she finally just gave up, screaming out agonizing moans. She didn't want to move or speak or have anyone else near. Her blood had stopped running long ago, no use in waiting to bleed to death now. She was out of arrows. She would have to live for now. But as time went on, she knew it would only get harder.

She longed for his touch, his kiss like the last one. She would cherish that last kiss, even if she hadn't the mind to kiss back. She wanted to feel his arms around her, telling her it was ok and that she would make it through this living nightmare. But then again, if that happened, she would already be relieved from the dream gone wrong.

"Kagome!" Sango's voice rang through the chorus of the hanyou's voice as he uttered those words again and again. She flinched, sobbing harder at the voice of someone to see what she had done. Now she would kill her, rid the remains of the group of a horrible murderer. That's right. Kagome Higurashi was a murderer, and she knew it.

"Kagome, what happened? Why are you crying? What did he do?" She cried, dropping her knees beside her friend, slipping a hand to her bloody back to caress her there, caringly. What had he done? Died, giving off those last words she so wanted to reply to him.

Miroku trailed behind her, beads of sweat rolling down the side of his face, but other than that, he had revived. His breaths were heavy as he leaned somewhat on the twin tailed neko youkai that lingered at his side. Shippo bounded up to the crying miko, burying his face against her shoulder as she hunched over, staring at her bloodied hands.

The monk stared, but before he could utter a word, Kagome raised her eyes back to Inuyasha's hanging body. She dropped soon after, her head hanging again to sob harder than ever. No words escaped her trembling lips. None were needed. They all stared with horrified eyes at the mangled corpse that pinned against the tree.

She was insane. She could feel it. Her touch with the world was slipping as a silence grew over them, drowning out her terrified crying. At least she was sane enough to know she was insane.

Miroku wandered from Kirara, dragging his unwilling feet to the tree, blood cascading in a river down the smoothed bark. The slim hope that he was still alive by the least was starting to fade as he raised two fingers to set on the side of his friend's cold throat. He jerked slightly at the feel of frozen skin. He gulped reluctantly, staring with eyes that refused to see the blue in his lips and feel the ice on his skin.

His lip quivered as he searched for a pulse. A moment later, his eyes glazed over, his fingers dropping from the boy's body. He let out a shaky breath, turning to the awaiting group. He hesitated to say anything at all before finally dropping the bomb.

"He's...dead..."

He heard Kagome slump over and scream. Try as she would, Sango couldn't calm her, tears coming to the slayers eyes to join the club. Miroku couldn't stop his own tears, feeling them streak down his cheeks in mini rivers as he tried to kneel by her and comfort her. Shippo's voice couldn't reach her, Kirara's velvet fur didn't soothe her.

She refused to move, her knees melting into the blood covered grass, her head shaking wildly and harshly. She moaned quietly, letting the feeling break through the bridge of hope she had struggled to put up. He was dead. And he wasn't coming back.

Raising her eyes to look at him, she felt empty, like she was starting all over again. The last year and a half was just pretend. This was exactly how she had found him, minus the blood and pained expression over his handsome face. This was the way Kikyou had left him, and now she had thrown him into this spot once more. Maybe he /was/ destined to stay pinned to that tree for all eternity. Or maybe it was just her who had picked out that fate.

'If I had just been stronger...If I had just pulled through, I could have saved him.' She told herself, scolding herself, punishing herself for all of it. Each mental wound she created on herself just didn't seem like enough to repay the death of the boy she loved.

Cackles lifted into the air, but she didn't bother to shift her gaze to see where the laughs echoed from. Her teeth grit angrily. Who could laugh at such a thing but the hanyou himself. She was staring straight at him. He was still dead as ever. Sanraku was the only other being who would dare to be so evil. But, again, she didn't bother to look.

Sango shot up, gripping the katana hilt that rested on her hip. The others swarmed around her, grabbing for their weapons to protect their broken friend. Shippo stuffed a hand into his pocket, ready to rip out anything at any moment , Kirara growling menacingly as the monk gripped the beads that shrouded his cursed hand.

Silence.

Ting!

The four whirled around, gazing with wide eyes through the hazy pink barrier that separated them from the others. Her head turned to gaze over to them with a limp and lifeless expression. Her face was pink, even through the glaze of the barrier.

"Damn! They tricked us!" Sango cried, pounding her fists to the pink glaze, calling the girl's name. Beat and scream as they would, the wall that severed them held strong. This demon's barriers were stronger than they could handle. What was left to do but destroy the beholder of them. The group was gone within the next few minutes, leaving the sobbing miko alone with the boy she had murdered.

Her head dropped back, her tears dropping straight to the grass below. Her vision was far from clear by now, no matter how much she tried to blink her tears away, they just kept filling to the brim once more. Memories flooded her mind, how the hanyou had slept, curled to her side. How he held her close to stop her tears and cure her unseen wounds. How he had caught her just in the nick of time when she stood on the edge of that building. How he had aided her wound when she had fallen, and then carried her afterwards. How he had let her kiss his cheek in the rain. How he had held her endlessly, so protectively, so lovingly. How he had kissed her so hungrily. How he had taken that last blow for her. How he had kissed her to pull her back to the surface...how he had died whispering that he loved her...

"How does it feel...losing the one you love? I know what it feels like...now you know too." An eerie voice tickled Kagome's ears. She lifted her bloodshot eyes to gaze upon the miko who stood before her, blocking her vision from the hanyou. She stood, hand folded behind her back, a sickeningly pleased smile forming on her lips.

..:----..-.-.-.--.-.-:..

Okay, heads up, lots and lots of blood up ahead. But just so I don't lose you completely, there is a happy part before this thing is over.

Right...glances around...I'm in a crappy mood. Bear with me, please. I'm really about to lose it. Maybe that's why I killed poor Inu off. Dunno. But here's a hint...I'm in love with that hanyou. I seriously love him with all my heart and would cry my eyes out while reading this, if it wasn't mine.

That give you any hope?

Well, I'll be gone for awhile, so I'm trying to get out as many updates as I possible can before I leave.